Bountiful Mothers, I stretch my arms out to you

[yemayasdaughter]

This year has been one of many ups and downs, I have laughed a lot and shed many tears. Now as winter is making is presence known, I am here, feeling alone in a room with many other people in it. I feel unloved, undesired, and worthless. I can even manage to find a job, when I have been working since I was 14 years old. I hate having to ask my Mother for money, I hate the fact that my sister's success makes me envious. I just want my moment to shine, that moment to rectify the mistakes I have made in my past. I want to move on to a better place, emotionally and physically.

I know you are with me, beautiful Mother Yemaya and Mother Pele. I know it is your arms I feel when I cry, Yemaya, and your fire which fuels me to fight this depression, Pele. I ask that you help me out once again. Please help me find a decent job. Please help me to become secure again. I am in debt and in a lot of trouble. Even worse, the shadow of my Father looms over me, and I fear that my family sees me as the loser they consider him to be. I want more out of my life. I want to make you proud, Mothers, and I want to make myself proud. I am comsumed by utter shame now. Please let my resume shine and glitter to the eyes of someone who would want to hire me someplace kind, and secure. I need a duty, I need purpose. I need to leave my house everyday, and have someplace important to go. I am ready to start my life now Mothers. Please help me to make that first step... I have been sending resumes every other day for the last two weeks.... it is your turn now. You and the fates please shine on me and let me get some interest.

I know that it is your will, not mine... but I cant be a burden any longer. Please, please. please hook me up.

With perfect love and trust, so mote it be.

Your daughter, Audrey