questions & answers

[Contra Mundum]

millions of questions and no answers.
so i'm going to put all my questions in this thread :thumbsup:
feel free to post yours too.

[Contra Mundum]

moldamn it ,i've been sitting here for a freaking half an hour and i can't find the words.
and this computer is acting up !!! :achillpil
all i wanna ask is, can you teach someone how to feel emotions over the internet. ?
to me it comes natural ,but i know someone who is having difficulties with this .
anyone know how i can help her ?

[Contra Mundum]

and i've got another one , i can be so annoying. :lilangel:
have you ever felt abandoned by your empathy ?
most of the time it warns me when someone bad is playing with me,or if someone is lying, you know what i mean right >?
but still there are times when you fail to see and feel things and you get burned, esspecially when you're in too deep,like in a friendship or something.
am i making any sense ??
i just can't seem to find the right words today. :ack:

[~*Ginger*~]

and i've got another one , i can be so annoying. :lilangel:
have you ever felt abandoned by your empathy ?
most of the time it warns me when someone bad is playing with me,or if someone is lying, you know what i mean right >?
but still there are times when you fail to see and feel things and you get burned, esspecially when you're in too deep,like in a friendship or something.
am i making any sense ??
i just can't seem to find the right words today. :ack:
Oh, I understand this one...

Yes, and when asked, he lied...

But that's ok, I know his worth now!
:adidas:

[Pesha]

Ok can you be betrayed by empathy. Yes you can. I have a couple of times and gotten very hurt in the end. My ex husband turned out to be abusive. My second husband was harbouring serious ilness and never let on til too late and he died. My exboyfriend ...........oh I still have trouble with that one. So yes hun t happens to all of us.


Teaching someone to use emotions fron on line. I can give you technique and then you have to go and try it out. Coming here and reading what is going on asking Q's as you do are all good ways to learn sweety.

Hope that helped a bit. :hugz:

BB
DS.

[Contra Mundum]

offcourse it did :smoochypo
thanks for taking the time to respond g & d ,
and (don't) worry there will be loads more questions :toofless:
here's another one :
do you ever feel guilty when you can't help someone and how do you deal with it ?
i always feel it's my duty to help others even when they betrayed or hurt me.
if i don't ,guilt makes sure i won't forget that i failed.

[Pesha]

offcourse it did :smoochypo
thanks for taking the time to respond g & d ,
and (don't) worry there will be loads more questions :toofless:
here's another one :
do you ever feel guilty when you can't help someone and how do you deal with it ?
i always feel it's my duty to help others even when they betrayed or hurt me.
if i don't ,guilt makes sure i won't forget that i failed.

The best way to answer you is this: You are not responsible for the whole world. We are going to be able to help some and some we will not be able to help. You ned to want to be helped before you can receive it. It is very important to remember that you must ask permission of a person before ever doing a working or empathic touching. If the person in question is very ill or unable to repond. You attempt to access their higher self and ask that way. I worked that way when I was nursing. You need not feel guilt. When I first began my empathic path, I wanted to help everyone and did feel guilt. But it will drive you crazy and make you ill if you do that. It is not failure at all. And remember too that in all things sometimes, failure is good. It teachs us. :hugz:

BB
DS.

[Lunacie]

That was actually one of my first "lessons". Someone asked me for healing for a sore elbow. I began sending energy and it felt like it was just running and running and running without filling his etheric body. Now I know that he wasn't keeping any of the energy, it was just running through him or across him without helping him any. Why? Probably because he wanted to hold onto that sore elbow for some reason. Maybe he hadn't learned the lesson it was giving him yet. Maybe he enjoyed the attention from having an "owie". Maybe he actually needed to see a physician about the problem. *shrug* I felt crappy for a little while, like I had failed, but then I realized I hadn't done anything wrong, or inadequately. He just couldn't accept the healing energy for some reason.

Yes, my empathy has been betrayed. Sometimes I ignore what it's telling me, but some people just don't seem to show up on our radar for some reason.

[Contra Mundum]

The best way to answer you is this: You are not responsible for the whole world. We are going to be able to help some and some we will not be able to help. You need to want to be helped before you can receive it. It is very important to remember that you must ask permission of a person before ever doing a working or empathic touching. If the person in question is very ill or unable to repond. You attempt to access their higher self and ask that way. I worked that way when I was nursing. You need not feel guilt. When I first began my empathic path, I wanted to help everyone and did feel guilt. But it will drive you crazy and make you ill if you do that. It is not failure at all. And remember too that in all things sometimes, failure is good. It teachs us. :hugz:

BB
DS.
:hmmmmm:
*takes notes* :toofless:
yeah you're making sense.
but i still get angry at myself when i'm unable to help,
and don't talk to me about people who are asking for help but don't freaking work with the help that's offered.
oh that's another question
like the other day i was in the helping hands forum and i'm talking and talking and talking(get the point?) :toofless:
given out advice after advice and this person just keeps complaining and i feel the energy pouring out of me, and then i get angry and become very harsh and annoyed.
what do you do ????
walk away ,stay,tell em the truth ,be harsh,say nothing, :whatgives

[Contra Mundum]

That was actually one of my first "lessons". Someone asked me for healing for a sore elbow. I began sending energy and it felt like it was just running and running and running without filling his etheric body. Now I know that he wasn't keeping any of the energy, it was just running through him or across him without helping him any. Why? Probably because he wanted to hold onto that sore elbow for some reason. Maybe he hadn't learned the lesson it was giving him yet. Maybe he enjoyed the attention from having an "owie". Maybe he actually needed to see a physician about the problem. *shrug* I felt crappy for a little while, like I had failed, but then I realized I hadn't done anything wrong, or inadequately. He just couldn't accept the healing energy for some reason.

Yes, my empathy has been betrayed. Sometimes I ignore what it's telling me, but some people just don't seem to show up on our radar for some reason.
do all these lessons have to be learned the hard way ?
don't get me started on energy and healing because that will take me another hundred posts. :lol:
oops sorry too late ;)
how does it work ???
are empaths natural born healers ,with that i mean physical healing not emotional ??
and why do we ignore things ? is it because we are not ready for it ,or that we need to learn a lesson ,and why do some people not show on our radar ? how is that possible?

if i'm getting annoying please tell me, because i can go on and on with asking questions :bigredblu
i just love to know the why's and the how's :uhhuhuh:

[Lunacie]

I haven't had that happen in the Helping Hands forum here, but on another board where I was doing some free readings (tarot and runes) there was one person who asked for one reading after another. I finally explained to her that I needed to spread my energies around, that it wasn't fair to devote so much of my time and energy to just one person. I think I managed to get the point across that she needed to do some thinking and work out some answers for herself without pointing out that she hadn't been grateful for the answers she had already gotten. With her it worked, with another person it didn't work quite as well, but she got too busy or found someone else to steal energy from and I didn't see her so much anymore.

You have to figure out where your boundaries are, and then let folks know when that's as far as it goes. If you can do it by building up their ego instead of making them feel like crap for asking, then it seems to work better. On this forum you have the option of putting the person on 'ignore' if they keep trying to take your time, your attention, your energy if nothing else works.

[Lunacie]

do all these lessons have to be learned the hard way ?
don't get me started on energy and healing because that will take me another hundred posts. :lol:
oops sorry too late ;)
how does it work ???
are empaths natural born healers ,with that i mean physical healing not emotional ??
and why do we ignore things ? is it because we are not ready for it ,or that we need to learn a lesson ,and why do some people not show on our radar ? how is that possible?

if i'm getting annoying please tell me, because i can go on and on with asking questions :bigredblu

i just love to know the why's and the how's :uhhuhuh:

It may seem like you're learning the "hard way" right now, but it's probably got more to do with the way you're feeling a lack of control than because it's actually that hard. When you look back later you'll think it wasn't such a big deal as it seems right now. You'll have a different perspective.

I don't think all empaths are natural healers, it's just that many of us tend to feel both the emotional pains and the physical pains because for many people they are too interconnected to separate them. And because we feel that pain and we want to stop feeling it, naturally we think "hey, how about if I try healing that pain?"

Why do we ignore some things? Good question. No answer here.
Why don't some people 'ping' on our radar? Maybe a past life connection with a lesson that wasn't finished. Maybe they have really good shields. Maybe they have themselves fooled so well that we can't tell the truth any better than they can. Maybe they are really good, convincing liars. Having empathy doesn't make us invincible. *pout*

[Pesha]

I feel emotion and I feel actual pain. I was working once when I had one of my CNAs come in with a terrible toothache. She would not go to the dentist. I finally had to send her home as the pain she had was in my mouth , my back and my arms. I could not do my job. It is no picnic beleive me. But it made me a more effective nurse. So it is good and bad and that is how life is....a a little light a little dark. Some grey inbetween.

Never apologise for asking Q's Borderlinsin ok. How else will you learn sweety.

BB
DS.

[Contra Mundum]

thanks lunacie ,i'm taking it all in .
Maybe they have themselves fooled so well that we can't tell the truth any better than they can. :T :T that made me laugh because it's so true !!:T :T
i don't really mind learning the hard way ,sometimes it's the only way.
well for me it is :bigredblu
*is thinking of new questions*

[Contra Mundum]

I feel emotion and I feel actual pain. I was working once when I had one of my CNAs come in with a terrible toothache. She would not go to the dentist. I finally had to send her home as the pain she had was in my mouth , my back and my arms. I could not do my job. It is no picnic beleive me. But it made me a more effective nurse. So it is good and bad and that is how life is....a a little light a little dark. Some grey inbetween.

Never apologise for asking Q's Borderlinsin ok. How else will you learn sweety.

BB
DS.
:dontknow: like this smilie we live.

never apologise ? but i know how annoying i can get once i'm on the question train
and at home i'm never allowed to ask questions ,they always get mad because i ask too many .
so for me it's safer to apologise in advance :bigblue:

thanks :smoochypo

[Contra Mundum]

is there something going on ??
for the last two weeks i've been getting nothing but bad news :(
it's so weird all these issues have things in common and i've been having bad nightmares.
anyone else having problems ?

[Pesha]

I hear there is something astrologically. I do not do charts and stars. I depend on others. Maybe someone else might know hun. This whole month is being difficult for me emotionally. Ask in the Astrology forum.

BB
DS.


PS. Ask me Q's. If it gets to me I will tell you. Otherwise ask me or anyone. we are here to learn. OK.

[Contra Mundum]

I hear there is something astrologically. I do not do charts and stars. I depend on others. Maybe someone else might know hun. This whole month is being difficult for me emotionally. Ask in the Astrology forum.

BB
DS.


PS. Ask me Q's. If it gets to me I will tell you. Otherwise ask me or anyone. we are here to learn. OK.
well the only thing i can find is that saturn is opposite neptune all month, that could give trouble.

On a sociopolitical level, the Saturn-Neptune opposition can lead to disillusionment with dominant ideologies and paradigms .
On a spiritual and psychological level, the Saturn-Neptune opposition represents a Dark Night of the Soul, a sense of isolation or imprisonment from the transcendent or the sense of the divine. Like all dilemmas involving the astrological Saturn, however, the response may inflict a sense of apathy or futility, on the one hand, or may strengthen a sense of spiritual fortitude and mettle.

and thank you :smoochypo

[LadyAriana]

and i've got another one , i can be so annoying. :lilangel:
have you ever felt abandoned by your empathy ?
most of the time it warns me when someone bad is playing with me,or if someone is lying, you know what i mean right >?
but still there are times when you fail to see and feel things and you get burned, esspecially when you're in too deep,like in a friendship or something.
am i making any sense ??
i just can't seem to find the right words today. :ack:

YES! That fits my last relationship to a tee! Couldn't pick up a blasted thing from my now ex. Finally I got a tingling of something was wrong, but I tried to ignore it when he didn't seem to be acting off. Well, damned if I wasn't right.

Normally I don't mind not feeling people, sometimes I feel like its an invasion of their privacy but you'd think that when MY feelings are at risk I should fairly have some sort of warning

[Contra Mundum]

YES! That fits my last relationship to a tee! Couldn't pick up a blasted thing from my now ex. Finally I got a tingling of something was wrong, but I tried to ignore it when he didn't seem to be acting off. Well, damned if I wasn't right.

Normally I don't mind not feeling people, sometimes I feel like its an invasion of their privacy but you'd think that when MY feelings are at risk I should fairly have some sort of warning

yeah see i think that's the case, we ignore it ,it's not that we don't get the warnings ,we just don't want to see them. :eyebrow:
i do not like it when i cannot feel someone makes me wonder what they've got to hide, know what i mean ?

[ravenmyst]

I find myself clouded when trying to read those close to me, as though my own hopes and expectations are fuzzing the picture, so yes, empathy has let me down, or more accurately I let my empathness down. as for feeling weird the last few weeks it is again trying to reach overload standards although my reflection shielding is helping. :hugz: and love

[Contra Mundum]

I find myself clouded when trying to read those close to me, as though my own hopes and expectations are fuzzing the picture, so yes, empathy has let me down, or more accurately I let my empathness down. as for feeling weird the last few weeks it is again trying to reach overload standards although my reflection shielding is helping. :hugz: and love
haven't seen you here in quite a while,good to have you back sis !:hugz:

[Contra Mundum]

what i was thinking about :wtf:
this maybe a bit off topic but do you think that all people treat you the same way, because of the energy you sent out or the way you behave?

what annoys me about this is that we as empaths know how people really feel and that makes it easier for us to know how to respond to them.
well not all the time but i think you know what i mean.
but most non empaths just don't (imo) .
or do they ? how do they do it ?
to me it seems that everyone i meet treats me the same way,is it because of me and how i come across or is it them and their lack of empathy?
i hope you understand what i'm trying to say,it's a bit confusing :hrmm:

[Pesha]

I understand hun. I feel personally non empaths have their own range of emotions that differ from ours. This due to the fact that emotionally they have flat affects. We as empaths being more sensitive, are more dimentional. So We are going to get the real lowdown on how a person feels about us and use it to our advantage. My POV.

BB
DS.

[Contra Mundum]

thanks dragonsinger i really appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions. :hugz:

[Contra Mundum]

headaches ?????
i worked with my friend today who recently lost her dad,
made me so tired just felt all my energy go out of my body and now i got this terrible headache.
how can this be,anyone of you ever get headaches because of your empathy or are there other reasons?
__________________

[Bethra]

I have experianced something similar before also. I wonder sometimes how much is actualy coming from the outside though. This type of headache is usualy due to a build up of pressure. This could be due to the energies coming off the other person or it could come from the presure you feel under trying to maintain a level energy for them.

:hugz: Don't worry too much about it honey and to help ease it try taking time outs from this person, go to the toilet anything just to ease the presure you are feeling :D

[Lunacie]

Yeah, most of my headaches are due to atmospheric pressures, but I've had a few as reactions to pressure coming from others or from trying to block them or shield from them. Probably more common for the headache and loss of energy to come when the pressure is gone.

[SammieAnn]

yes I get the headaches... I have one now. actually I should probably get out of here for now until I feel better. anyone know of something I can do for this sore throat? see you guys later

[Pesha]

Headaches, yes I get them. I have to distinquish whichare from just regular conditions and which are due to my empathics. Sometimes it all just blurs together and I have to shut my self off for a while.

BB
DS.

[Astara Seague]

yes I get the headaches... I have one now. actually I should probably get out of here for now until I feel better. anyone know of something I can do for this sore throat? see you guys later

Honey and Lemon tea!:uhhuhuh:

[SammieAnn]

Honey and Lemon tea!:uhhuhuh:
thank you so mutch, Iwill try it tonight

[Contra Mundum]

I have experianced something similar before also. I wonder sometimes how much is actualy coming from the outside though. This type of headache is usualy due to a build up of pressure. This could be due to the energies coming off the other person or it could come from the presure you feel under trying to maintain a level energy for them.

:hugz: Don't worry too much about it honey and to help ease it try taking time outs from this person, go to the toilet anything just to ease the presure you are feeling :D

i saw her again today and i tried it out ,i don't know how many times i went to the bathroom :lol: but it helped ,i only have a minor headache ,still feeling tired but not as bad as yesterday .
thanks :smoochypo

[Lunacie]

:T
Now that's a 'potty break'.

[Bethra]

i saw her again today and i tried it out ,i don't know how many times i went to the bathroom :lol: but it helped ,i only have a minor headache ,still feeling tired but not as bad as yesterday .
thanks :smoochypo

I'm so glad it helped a little for you honey. You will be bound to still feel a little tierd since you are having to maintain a level with this person so it's perfectly understandable but it's good that you are headace free in general.

Whenever you feel your shield isn't strong enough this time out is a wonderfull way to help. Sure you get sick of the sight of the bathroom after a while but it gives you time to put that shield back in place and give it a quick clean :D

[Pesha]

If I had a dollar for every time I have had to go into the bathroom or other room, I would be rich. Borderlinesin, hun, hang in there. It does get better and you will get stronger. :hugz:

BB
DS.

[Contra Mundum]

:T
Now that's a 'potty break'.
:T i know :T

[Contra Mundum]

:T thanks bethra and dragonsinger :smoochypo