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flar7
December 8th, 2001, 02:02 AM
Do you use them? If not why?

Flaire-FireStar
December 8th, 2001, 03:19 AM
never had a need to use one. ;):nyah:

Drisel
December 8th, 2001, 03:41 AM
I used to use them all the time but I am that one that they don't always work for. I belive that my seven year old was a trojan and the new baby ( 13 months) was sheik. I really didn't want anymore(children) so after the last one I "closed the factory". :)

Since then we havn't really used anything and I have to say it really is better without. ;)

Myst
December 8th, 2001, 04:07 AM
Not anymore. Why? Two words - monogamy and testing. Those would be the only two reasons (and in conjunction) in my mind to not use them. *shrugs* (and psst you should've added those options to the poll :D)

mato
December 8th, 2001, 05:13 AM
Well what would I be protecting myself from, computer viruses? celebit (sp?) :):(
:wah::lol::woah::huh::wave::ugh::thumbsup::sunny:
:spidey: (:hearteyes wow wered he come from?!):smoke::smash: (ouch!) :sick::uzi::shot::shaker::scream::apirate: ( :eyebrow::rolleyes::rotfl: ) :nonono::meanhead:
:meanface::shift:
and besides theirs only one guy for me :devil: ( :heartthro :hearteyes :smooch: :mmm::bubbles: )
Ok thats enough smilies from me! :evilway: Oh now how did you get in here! Naughty naughty smiliey! Off with you now, go play with the others...

Did i meantion that I am tired and it is far past my bed time?

flar7
December 8th, 2001, 05:26 AM
implied, "if you are sexually active?" Just thought it was
obvious? LOL

Myst, after I started thinking of reasons not to use condoms,
there werent going to be enough options. So, I went with the
trusty ol' "other" option. -le sigh-

Girls could have reasons even I aint familiar with for not liking
condoms!!! LOL

mato
December 8th, 2001, 05:28 AM
:rotfl:

StormChaser
December 8th, 2001, 03:35 PM
Originally posted by Myst
Not anymore. Why? Two words - monogamy and testing. Those would be the only two reasons (and in conjunction) in my mind to not use them. *shrugs* (and psst you should've added those options to the poll :D)

What she said.
That accompanied by the pill, which I have my OWN method for taking... because the doctors method just doesn't work. I take 3 pills for 3 days when I'm "due".

I have yet to have a doctor tell me exactly what is going on in my uterus. I'm either very fertile half the year, or only fertile 2 to 3 times a year *thats how many times a year i get my period without pill induction*

SimplyStrange
December 8th, 2001, 05:07 PM
I've never had to use one. And I'm only 15, so I don't see myself having to use one anytime soon (and I'll be sure to tell the ol' boyfriend, too ;))

Wyrdsister
December 8th, 2001, 07:34 PM
I use condoms, though I use the one's without spermicidal lubrication. Both my Love and I are allergic to Nonoxil 9, and we haven't found any spermicidal condoms without said ingredient. And really, adding lube to a condom is fun! 8O :D

We've been using a condoms and withdrawl combination for birth (and disease) control. To be honest, I didn't know just how effective this combination was until I checked out the link to Planned Parenthood that StormChaser posted in the "Damn these people!" thread (i.e. nearly 100% effective). Wowee! :D

And now you know what birth control I use! What fun... ;)

Wyrdsister

---------------
Here is that link I mentioned: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/bc/CONTRACHOICES.HTM

Laiste
December 8th, 2001, 07:46 PM
My husband and I have used condoms for birth control for the last 12 years! Never had a problem with them and never had one break! I can't take the pill and the last time we tried the pull-out method...well, put it this way, my son is now 8 years old!:p

Laiste
December 8th, 2001, 07:48 PM
Oh yeah...I just wanted to mention for those who don't like the sensation or lack of...there are condoms out there that are ribbed and textured....oohhh :D

StormChaser
December 8th, 2001, 07:55 PM
Still horrible. for me though, it depends on the size of the guy.. if he's well.. hung.. hey yeah.. go ahead use a condom.. won't matter.

If he's average.. well.. unless he MREOW in the sack, i'm gonna be bored anyway, last thing hed want is a condom to put me to sleep.

*laughs*

God i'm tacky.

Siren
December 8th, 2001, 07:57 PM
okay, when i was with my ex-bf, we were together for so long we stopped using them....which was a dumbass move on my part cause he was cheating.....and never told...so the so-called monogamy idea doesn't always work....

and, i am on birth control pills....which seem to work quite well....

and, yes, i have made a dumb mistake before....not using a condom when i should've (one night stand....d'oh!)....but went and got tested.....no std's ....close call....*grin*

so now i am not with my ex...and i use them....

so ha!

USE THEM!!!!!! THEY ARE A VERY GOOD WAY TO STOP STDS FROM SPREADING....

although, they do nothing for for AIDS.....but, you can't win them all....

:smoke:

Myst
December 8th, 2001, 09:44 PM
Siren, if he was cheating, it's not called monogamy anymore. :D

Second, condoms do offer protection against STDs including HIV

http://www.thedailyapple.com/target/cs/article/cs/100282.html#ITEM 5
http://www.ppmarmonte.org/news/viewer.asp?ID=136
http://www.fda.gov/fdac/reprints/ots_stds.html

Third, you guys should really check out the Fertility forum once in awhile coz this condom stuff and tons more info about this is there.

Sage Witch
December 8th, 2001, 11:05 PM
We use them. Had one break just last week. Under the circumstances of the break, (before he climaxed, we were using an extra spermicide, and we caught it right away) we decided that if I am pregnant I'm the Virgin Mary, but I'm still going to test as soon as I can just in case. I'm still debating about whether or not to go on the pill. I'm afraid of the extra hormones making overly emotional me even more so.

Laiste
December 8th, 2001, 11:45 PM
Originally posted by Myst
Siren, if he was cheating, it's not called monogamy anymore. :D

Second, condoms do offer protection against STDs including HIV

http://www.thedailyapple.com/target/cs/article/cs/100282.html#ITEM 5
http://www.ppmarmonte.org/news/viewer.asp?ID=136
http://www.fda.gov/fdac/reprints/ots_stds.html

Third, you guys should really check out the Fertility forum once in awhile coz this condom stuff and tons more info about this is there.

Thank you Myst!! the last thing we need is people getting the wrong idea and not bothering to use a condom because someone told them they don't protect you from HIV!!!:rolleyes: There is no other protection from HIV or other STDs besides abstainance and in my opinion that's just no fun!! :p

Lucidia
December 9th, 2001, 07:28 AM
the world is an icky place. it's sad that spouses and lifemates cheat and ruin lives of those who trusted them.

however, i trust my husband. i'm on injectible birth control. so.. well... i'm just dandy without them.

before i was married, and i had to use them (of course), i recommend durex. they have a vareity of sizes, thicknesses, strengths, and they come with, and without lubrication (spermicidal or not).

also, those polyurethane(sp?) ones... for people with latex allergies.. well.. they only come in one size.. and yeah.. they do let body heat through.. but well... they aren't sure IF they protect against STDS (like lambskins). but they do protect against pregnancy.

Wyrdsister
December 9th, 2001, 11:04 AM
Originally posted by StormChaser
Still horrible. for me though, it depends on the size of the guy.. if he's well.. hung.. hey yeah.. go ahead use a condom.. won't matter.

If he's average.. well.. unless he MREOW in the sack, i'm gonna be bored anyway, last thing hed want is a condom to put me to sleep. I'm assuming you've tried a lube of some sort? That could make a most pleasureable difference... :D

Wyrdsister

raevyncigany
December 9th, 2001, 11:40 AM
Hubby and I don't have to use them anymore...hubby's fixed ;)

We used to, though, right after the birth of our second and third child and for a long time afterwards...I guess now you can kind of guess just about when we STOPPED using them....hehehehehe

BB

Rae )0(

Psyche Ague
December 9th, 2001, 12:11 PM
Don't leave home without 'em.

I swear by condoms and I refuse to have sex without them. It's just stupid if you're like me and you DON'T want to get pregnant. Monogamy is great, but pregnancy is not. Well, it's not if you're 17 and hoping to go to college and have a life without a child.

I've had one condom break on me, but thankfully, nothing happened. (thank you, spermicide!!!) We caught it in time, too.

I'm all for condoms.

kittiepoetrygod
December 9th, 2001, 02:31 PM
I've bought condoms on occasion (those cool multi-colored ones) but normally there wasn't enough time to do all the fun stuff before someone came alookin ... but even if you don't get to use them the useual way, they're very fun to play with. hehe.

StormChaser
December 9th, 2001, 03:00 PM
Originally posted by Wyrdsister
I'm assuming you've tried a lube of some sort? That could make a most pleasureable difference... :D

Wyrdsister

Lube? If you need lube with me, you'r doin something wrong. If I'm turned on lube will be an absolutely retarded and redundant additive.

Siren
December 9th, 2001, 09:38 PM
The little virus that transmits the HIV virus is smaller than the holes that are in latex....every solid constructed thing is made of molecules that bounce around, so there are holes in it....even in desks, tables, chairs, and condoms....

these holes are certain sizes depending on the material (ie. wood, latex, metal)...

latex's holes are larger than the size of the virus that transmits HIV.....

this was only a recent finding through scientific research (in canada, which has the most advanced research in std's and pregnancy...cause the hospital that does it is in my hometown....they are also the ones who are ahead on DNA stuff.....)

so that is how i know...and it is not an excuse for not using condoms....cause i usually do....i just made a stupid mistake.....i know it was stupid...and i learned from it....

i now carry "extra strength" condoms...all the time....

SimplyStrange
December 9th, 2001, 09:55 PM
I'm kind of praying that the issue of sex doesn't come up soon with my boyfriend...though I'm sure it will come up eventually... Till then I'll say I haven't the need for condoms...and hopefully not for awhile. Well, rather, I'm pretty sure it won't be for awhile. I mean, I'm hoping the issue stays away for awhile too...

Uh...I've lost myself? :)

Xois
December 9th, 2001, 10:50 PM
Well, I have been with the same person for 5 years and we are monogomous so we no longer use condoms. When we first were together, we did however and if I ever were to leave this relationship, I would always use them!

I am on the pill so pregnancy is not an issue for me (thank goodness!)

I chose the second option. I had to go off the pill for a few months and found that I could not reach orgams when my mate was using a condom. So we ended up having only oral sex for the months I was off the pill...

Now I am back on so it is no longer an issue.

Cheers
Xois

Xois
December 9th, 2001, 10:54 PM
The little virus that transmits the HIV virus is smaller than the holes that are in latex....

this is no my understanding...could you give me a source please?

I found this on the CDC website

"HIV can not get through latex or polyurethane condoms. Don't use lambskin condoms"

I believe the latex does block it but the lambskin does not...

Thanks
Xois

Pheonix
December 10th, 2001, 01:28 AM
My husband and are only with one another, (and I trust him) so we know longer use condoms. I also have depo to stop the worry of children so I think thing are perfect.

Myst
December 10th, 2001, 02:21 AM
Originally posted by Xois
"HIV can not get through latex or polyurethane condoms. Don't use lambskin condoms"

Xois is correct. Research shows that used properly condoms help prevent the transmission of HIV. Please review some of the links I shared or other ones, in particular the second link, which discusses how recently the department of health spread some misinformation on the subject.

"Laboratory tests show that organisms as small as sperm and the HIV virus cannot pass through polyurethane condom. But the risks of STDs, including HIV infection, have not been well studied in actual use with polyurethane condoms. So unless one or both partners is allergic to latex, latex condoms should be used.

Labeling for latex condoms states that if used properly, latex condoms help reduce risk of HIV transmission and many other STDs. This statement, a modification from previous labeling, now appears on individual condom wrappers, on the box, and in consumer information."

As Xois said, HIV can't get through latex or polyurethane, but as of now latex is still preferred.

Kaylara
December 10th, 2001, 10:17 AM
With Traz, we don't use condoms anymore. With my new boyfriend and girlfriend (who are dating each other too), you bet we use them! I get tested regularly and have come up negative for disease everytime. I don't use birthcontrol pills because of their very negative side effects on my psyche. I'm in a polyamorus relationship, but one of the stipulations is that if either me or Traz sleep with someone else that condoms must be in use.


Kaylara

ANUR36
December 10th, 2001, 07:24 PM
What would be a religious reason not to wear a condom???

StormChaser
December 10th, 2001, 07:47 PM
Several religions have rules regarding inhibiting procreation. Catholicism has been against not only birth control devices but also against any form of abortive methods. While there reasoning is mostly to prevent promiscutity it's also against hindering "God's work"
MANY other religions have sited birth control as being unnatural and against god's work and desires.

Siren
December 10th, 2001, 08:00 PM
can't really give you the resources since they are in medical books and pamphlet in my college health centre......sorry.....

and other places are kinda slow on the advanced research done around my area.....so we are lucky to be well informed i guess....

to not get HIV, abstinence is the only way.....

and yes, i read all your info....and it was all from the US...which means nothing, since their STD and Pregnancy information and education is years behind canada......

flar7
December 10th, 2001, 08:08 PM
? is hard to talk about something if you cant give a source. The
World's Health Orginizations, (with France which is the leader in
AIDS research) tell you to use condoms to avoid HIV. Perhaps it
is in the wording. HIV causes AIDS. Condoms prevent HIV.

plus, if it is in print, it is not cutting edge. Especially at a school.
Most research that is new is currently in the lab.

flar7
December 10th, 2001, 08:23 PM
http://www.who.int/HIV_AIDS/Condoms/effectiveness_of_condoms_in_prev.htm

Xois
December 10th, 2001, 08:48 PM
thanks flar that was interesting!

flar7
December 11th, 2001, 12:59 AM
France's work, it quit workin?

Myst
December 11th, 2001, 01:08 AM
RiiiIIiight.

flar7
December 11th, 2001, 01:11 AM
take search engine, insert France, AIDS. and start there.
It was like third on my msn list. reeeallllyyy!!

Starlight
December 11th, 2001, 10:21 AM
Originally posted by SimplyStrange
I've never had to use one. And I'm only 15, so I don't see myself having to use one anytime soon (and I'll be sure to tell the ol' boyfriend, too ;))

Yep I'm with you SS! I'm only 17 and the last time I checked it required a mate to do the horizontal mombo and I don't got one of those soooo...! :D Oh well I like to think of it like this anyway......."No ring , no shwing" :lol:

Wyrdsister
December 11th, 2001, 10:47 AM
Originally posted by Siren
can't really give you the resources since they are in medical books and pamphlet in my college health centre......sorry.....

and other places are kinda slow on the advanced research done around my area.....so we are lucky to be well informed i guess.... Wow, when did Hamilton become the hotbed of advanced research? We certainly haven't heard this information up in Ottawa. :p ;)

Actually, you can quote us the names and dates of the medical books if you like. Are you in med school? If so, I'd imagine you'd have pretty up-to-date books (at least I'd hope! 8O) :D Mind you, if you're talking about a college health centre, I don't know if I'd trust them to have the most up to date info.

Wyrdsister

Midnight_Raven
December 11th, 2001, 10:54 AM
i dont need one quite yet thank u

Myst
December 11th, 2001, 11:35 AM
I was wondering about that. Even in London we don't have that kind of info. *sigh* Go Steeltown! Err, I mean, go Forest City!! :D

Danustouch
December 11th, 2001, 11:43 AM
Okay..these are my views on Condoms.

I don't use them, because I don't need them. I'm in a monogomous relationship, married, 26 years old, with a man who doesn't cheat (he wouldn't have the time, trust me.). \

However...if you are not married, or in some other long term, monogomous relationship, where the two of you have an understanding that you are entirely committed to eachother, and a future together, you should use them.

They may not protect against pregnancy ALL of the time. You should always have a back up method, too.

They might not always protect against STD's...but..that is why you should be tested, and have your partners tested, and feel free to ask ANYTHING about their past, Take a while to get to know them, first, etc, etc, etc. Condoms may not be a perfect defense against STD's. But it is one of the best shields we have at the moment. The best idea we have...

Besides that of common sense.

Danustouch
December 11th, 2001, 11:49 AM
By the way...you know what really bothers me?

The attitude that.."No birth control method, or STD prevention method is perfect..so why bother? Just go out and have sex...and hope that nothing happens.".

That is rediculous. You can't be sure, even with condoms, that you will be protected. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't at least "TRY" To protect yourself by using them. That's like diving into a lake that you don't know the depth of and saying.."Well, I probably won't need a life preserver...I don't think it will be that deep".

They are currently, our best line of defense, aside from abstinence. If you aren't going to abstain from sex, then do the responsible thing. Don't think about your "Sensations" or what a pain in the butt it is. Think responsibly. Birth control pills fail, too. And I can tell you, Raising an infant, as a single mother, when you're also trying to complete your education...or ..Having a disease of ANY sort, that you got from a partner you thought would be faithful, is MUCH more a pain in the butt. And if you want to claim..."oo..it diminishes my sensation.". Umm...since when did that become the ONLY method of acheiving sexual gratification. And I'm sorry..but though it may somewhat diminish your or your partners pleasure during intercourse....if you love that person, and you are joining them in a union of body and soul..NOTHING can diminish your pleasure to the extreme that you'd feel nothing.

Psyche Ague
December 11th, 2001, 12:52 PM
INCREDIBLY well-said, Danustouch!!! :thumbsup:

flar7
December 11th, 2001, 03:28 PM
those unfortunate guys who are out having sex for themselves.

You may not like em' but they are out there. And the sensation
thing is a huge issue for lots of guys. I wouldnt be surprised
if it wasnt the number one reason most guys who dont use em, dont use em. (did that say what it was supposed to?)

Comfort or discomfort is a major roll in sex. Not making love,
which I consider something else entirely.

The guys I know who use condoms, do so out of fear! Not
responsibility. Us guys have shown that we arent very
responsible unless you make us. Not all guys, but you would be
surprised at how many!

Danustouch
December 11th, 2001, 03:55 PM
You are right. Not all guys OR all women, will choose to do the responsible thing, if it inconveniences them. And that is a really sad statement on their personalities, if you ask me. Part of the reason that the levels of unwanted pregnancies, and STD's are so high, is because people are out having sex, for the SOLE purpose of sexual gratification, in as many ways, as many times, and with as many people, as humanly possible. I'm not a prude, and I don't say that people should only have sex if they are in a monogomous long term relationship. But..if they are GOING to have multiple sexual engagements..they should protect themselves, and the person they are having sex with. I do want to emphasize the routine testing thing, though. I think it cannot be stressed enough, that if one intends to have multiple sexual liasons in their lifetime, they need to be tested, and tested often. Yes..I know that there are some people, with HIV or other STD's, who go out and have unprotected sex ANYWAY...which, is horrible. But hopefully, some people who got positive STD results, would think twice before giving the same nightmare, to another person.

Back when I was on the dating scene..I got tested regularly. Even though I was using protected sex. And I kept the reports from the doctor, giving me a free bill of health. Anytime I started dating someone, I brought the topic up, after a while. And told them I would gladly show them the test results. And that I'd like to see theirs, as well. If they didn't have any results, or if they hadn't yet been tested. I'd ask them to go and GET one. If they weren't willing to do that, it showed me volumes about how selfish the person was, and what their true feelings were about me, and about life in general. Chances are, if a guy isn't going to aknowledge the sacredness of MY life, and value that, enough to get a test. He just isn't worth my time.

Wyrdsister
December 11th, 2001, 04:17 PM
Originally posted by Myst
I was wondering about that. Even in London we don't have that kind of info. *sigh* Go Steeltown! Err, I mean, go Forest City!! :D :lol: I guess London and Ottawa must be the "research backwaters" of Ontario! :D

And well said, Danustouch! *applaud* I know some birth control/STD protection methods aren't good for everyone, but if you are going to be sexually active with multiple partners why wouldn't you want to use something? Maybe it's a bit of a "cramp in one's style," but doesn't it show respect for your lover that you want to protect them as well as your self?

Kaylara, I liked what you said about your's and Traz's relationship. You are both very open with one another, and you always use protection when you are with someone other than each other. Kudos to both of you and your openess! :thumbsup:

Wyrdsister

flar7
December 12th, 2001, 04:19 PM
bump

Starlight
December 13th, 2001, 08:06 AM
:eyebrow:

Myst
December 13th, 2001, 08:15 AM
so far

15 do, 6 don't, and 18 chose other (presumably because they're either not having sex yet or because they don't use condoms for some other reason). And we wonder why HIV and other STDs are still spreading!? Considering of all those who chose a side of the fence half as many who do use them do not, for reasons like "lack of sensation" or "just don't like 'em" or "allergies" (uhm use polyurethane)?

Wow I have to say I am really disappointed.

StormChaser
December 13th, 2001, 10:46 AM
The poll is far to specific to be precise, implying always and never terms. A lot of people may be choosing "other" because "yes I use them" "no i dont use them for this purpose" is just to black and white. For example:1. They HAVE used condoms, but don't now, or vice versa. 2.They who use female condoms, not male condoms, which is what the general assumption is when they hear condom. 3.They are all those celibate
4. They are fixed and committed. 5. They are in poly relationships where they use condoms with people other than their spouse.
There are a million reasons for not being able to pick "Yes" or "No because..."

I've been involved with the same man for over a year. We don't use condoms. We've also both tested clean. We're also monogomous. He also has a harder time getting it up and keeping it up without the use of a condom restricting bloodflow, than I do of avoiding getting pregnant from a half sterile man. Because of his.. inability to keep an erection on the high holy days, i really don't worry much about him sleeping around.

If he and I broke up tommorrow.. I'd still test clean..
And my future bf\gf would still have nothing to worry about.

I personally, would never have sex with a guy or girl who didn't go with me to planned parenthood or their doctor and get tested.
Being responsible has a lot more to do with being sexually discriminant than it does to picking a color or brand of condom. There are a million other diseases out there much more common than aids, that a condom doesn't do jack against.

Casual sex, more than unprotected sex, is the danger.
You don't really get more unprotected than bedding a total stranger.

~Storm

Happydog
December 13th, 2001, 12:45 PM
I used to and then I got a vasectomy. No more condoms

Danustouch
December 13th, 2001, 01:51 PM
Are you Single? Married? Long term monogomous relationship? More info please?

Happydog
December 13th, 2001, 03:36 PM
Long term monogamous relationship, now married.

The vasectomy is a great thing. We decided a long time ago we didn't want kids. Previous to the vasectomy we used condoms, but after the last breakage and subsequent pregnancy scare, I basically said "The hell with this," and went ahead and had it done.

It wasn't like there weren't breakages before, because no matter what brand we bought, at least one out of the pack would break. And none of them fit very well; they were always too tight around the base, which can get to be painful. We tried all sorts of brands. The polyurethane one was the second worst, it felt like having sex while wearing a sandwich bag. The worst was the lambskin, which was just plain...WRONG. Eucch. Grotesque smell and feel.

The good thing about the condom part, though, was that when we ran out, or when we just didn't want to bother with stopping all the action to rip the pack open (a chore in itself with some brands) and rolling it on (also a real fun job with some brands), we learned to improvise and do things that didn't involve intercourse. This was good because that way you learn all sorts of other fun stuff to do.

I used condoms before I met my wife, but most of the people I had relationships with were on the pill. I never, never had sex with anybody with no protection, even before AIDS was on the scene (yes, I am that old).

Anyway...hopefully not too much info!

Arduinna
December 13th, 2001, 06:05 PM
I don't use them, I'm married. I should add I became sexually active before Aids/HIV. So I never used them much, the pill was much better.

Also the sensation/feeling issue also effects women and not just men. Condoms make it feel very different to me as a woman, yuck I hate those things.

StormChaser
December 13th, 2001, 11:19 PM
Originally posted by Arduinna
I don't use them, I'm married. I should add I became sexually active before Aids/HIV. So I never used them much, the pill was much better.

Also the sensation/feeling issue also effects women and not just men. Condoms make it feel very different to me as a woman, yuck I hate those things.

I agree. As far as sexual pleasure goes for me. I may aswell not be having sex if a condom is being used. I think something about latex puts me to sleep :lol:

Myst
December 14th, 2001, 02:32 PM
"Condoms break about 2 percent of the time".

http://www.thebody.com/cdc/factcond.html

A link including some reasons "carelessness is the main reason condoms break".

http://www.halifax.cbc.ca/streetcents/show/more/show_02_00/condoms.html

"HIV cannot get through latex condoms unless they break"

http://www.state.ma.us/dph/cdc/factsheets/CONDOM.HTM

Valoe
December 14th, 2001, 02:56 PM
Originally posted by Myst
[B"HIV cannot get through latex condoms unless they break"

[/B]

I work with young people (for a charity) including running sessions on sexual health. HIV *does not* get through condoms. There are other life threatening/ life changing diseases that condoms protect against too: syphilis can kill if untreated (and as it attacks the central nervous system can cause insanity); there is a rising epidemic in chlamydia among young people - many have no symptoms and it can cause pelvic inflammatory disease and infertility if untreated. Something else to consider - how many people use condoms for oral sex? The risks of infection are just as great. I have met too many who think that as long as they use condoms for penetrative intercourse, anything else is OK. Dental dams are effective for protection with oral sex as well.

Raindancer
December 14th, 2001, 11:23 PM
They're a pain. They don't just slip on, you have to muck around with them to get them on right. When you are deep in the throes of passion, and your hands are trembling, its awkward. Another thing is that you have to stop everything so you can do this unsexy thing. Its like stopping to read a page out of the phone book. On one occasion, I had one, and it was a good one, a Trojan, literally explode on me. All that was left on me was this little latex ring, though getting the pieces out was interesting. It would have been more fun if we werén't worrying if we were going to be sudden parents. You would think that in the last several decades that they would have come up with something better. Maybe some kind of fast applicator where you just slap in on and go for your life.
Raindancer

Chibi-Fallon
December 15th, 2001, 12:02 AM
Well you were put on this Earth for a reason. ;) Or have a kid and do the funky Gattac thing and pick him out to invent crazy condom applicators (that actually sounds kinda cool). That movie is crazy. The dude who plays the real cripple Jerome is dead sexy tho.

Raindancer
December 15th, 2001, 04:47 AM
There's gotta be something better than present day condoms. Maybe a latex spray that creates an instant bug proof barrier, Or some kind of low temperature shrink wrap that becomes form fitting using body heat? Meanwhile, I would suggest not having sex with someone unless you would have a baby with them, and are sure they're clean. Makes me think of the old WWII movies when the guy is masquerading as a German and some Gestapo officer always confronts him and says "Show me your papers". It just pays to use some sense, but then, as H.L Mencken once said: "Nobody ever lost money betting on human stupidity".
Raindancer

Chibi-Fallon
December 15th, 2001, 10:14 PM
If I bet on it it would. Everything I bet on never wins. :( Kinda sucks.

StormChaser
December 16th, 2001, 06:15 AM
Originally posted by Raindancer
There's gotta be something better than present day condoms. Maybe a latex spray that creates an instant bug proof barrier, Or some kind of low temperature shrink wrap that becomes form fitting using body heat?

"Nobody ever lost money betting on human stupidity".
Raindancer

I heard of a kid using saran wrap once.. obviously the girl got pregnant... but i couldn't help laughing.


Wheres the betting booth on that.. my bfs tryin to buy a house, he could use a few...

*laughs*

My philosophy is simple, if they won't walk to planned parenthood with me, then they won't be laying in the bed with me!

Raindancer
December 16th, 2001, 07:24 AM
Saran wrap? Talk about desperate... As I said before, I had a Trojan fail in a big way once, what kind of chance does Saran wrap have? People find the most ingenious ways to be stupid. Going to Planned Parenthood and discussing options, picking one and being responsible enough to stick to it sounds like the only way to go. There is just too much at stake to play Russian Roulette with your lives, and a possible child/ren.

Chibi... smile, think of all the money you save by not betting...
Blessings, Raindancer

Danustouch
December 17th, 2001, 11:53 AM
Well, Frankly, I'm really disturbed by the number of people who are sexually active here, and not using condoms. With this attitude, the incidences of AIDS will continue to be on the increase. I just hope that none of you ever have to face that harsh reality. And that you are all being tested on a regular basis, at the very least, so that you can at least be that responsible. I mean..if you are getting tested, then at least you're not knowingly passing anything on to your partners.

lucidfire
December 18th, 2001, 12:43 AM
condoms all the way! The pill is nice but the side affects for women aren't good, and that's her call.

Siren
December 22nd, 2001, 01:18 PM
When i was with my ex...and we first started sleeping together, the condoms kept on breaking, it was a pain....talk about pregnancy scares....(i was on the pill, but, antibiotics cause them to stop working...and of course, this was when the condom broke....right at christmas too....happy holidays to me....)...thank the gods for the morning after pill...

and yes, putting on a condom is not sexy...but the more you do it, the easier it gets....

doesn't bother me any when a guy stops to put one on....i can wait....*grin*...i have fingers and toys that can keep me occupied for a couple of minutes....

and, when i thought i may have had an STD, i was tested for chlamydia, herpes, and gonorrhea....but not AIDS or HIV....apparently it's not a priority in clinics.....they test for the "swab" stuff first....

turned out that the pains i was having is what they thought was a cyst in my uterus...then it turned out it was an underdeveloped ovum (which i should not get since i am on the pill)....and that it went away...i still get pain there however....but apparently there is no reason to....maybe it's psycho sematic...but it sure as hell feels real....

Happydog
December 22nd, 2001, 04:52 PM
I don't know if I would worry that the people who say they don't like condoms aren't using them. I don't like them but before the vasectomy I sure used them! It helps to have a sense of humor about it. "Wait! I must prepare the royal spear to venture into the Cave of Mystery!" Something like this usually makes the other person laugh and in my (male) experience, if you can get her to laugh she'll be that much more into it, because women like guys who make them laugh.

There are a lot of people here, I think, who are in committed relationships, too, and a lot of people who are flying solo. So I'm not sure it's as bleak as it looks.

Myst
December 23rd, 2001, 04:11 PM
Makes sense. I agree with that thinking too, Happydog.

DreamSpell333
January 3rd, 2002, 04:25 PM
Don't use them, cause we want to have a child, plus the lack of sensation with them . for him.... Plus were getting married, so were not roaming. He's the one for me :)). We were both tested before we got serious, I wanted to make sure we did , before we got serious serious... ( I knew we'd both be ok though ) :)

StormChaser
January 3rd, 2002, 05:24 PM
Originally posted by Happydog
"Wait! I must prepare the royal spear to venture into the Cave of Mystery!"

Oh good.. I'm not the only person guilty of using a bit of SCA type humor in the bedroom.

"your my first mate so..."
"Well I like to mate.. but I wouldn't call me'self the first"

"are ye into sailin your own vessel or would ye like me te navigate for a while?"

*chortles*

s1ren
January 3rd, 2002, 05:46 PM
I wasn't gonna get into this, but...

Ok. Have used condoms, but they're a pain in the ass, don't work real well, plus I'm REALLY allergic to latex, so I don't anymore.

I've used Depo for a year now....and Phoenix...you said you were on it. Please, please, please be careful. I thought I had done all my research before I took it, and there was SOOOO much I didn't know. Depo is wrecking my body. That's not what this thread is about, so I won't waste a whole lot of space on it, but I just worry about anyone who takes it now :ack: :( I'm going back on the pill this weeked.

-s1ren

p.s.: hi siren!! You're the first person I've ever met online with the same name :cool:

Myst
January 3rd, 2002, 05:57 PM
Have you tried polyurethane condoms instead?

s1ren
January 3rd, 2002, 06:15 PM
:eek: I didn't know there was such a thing! Neato!

Bet they're still a pain in the a$$, tho ;)

-s1ren

Haedis
January 27th, 2002, 10:19 PM
Don't use them because my boyfriend literally feels nothing when we used them. I know he wouldn't lie...and I could TELL he felt nothing. I'm not too worried about disease (we were both virgins when we met and i know he's faithful). We don't use any protection, though he's very good about pulling out. Yeah yeah, I know its a terrible way to do it, but nothings gone wrong so far and we've been using this method for...well quite some time.

something i heard from my health teacher...i dont know how true it is :
This teenage couple were about to have sex...but didnt have any condoms. They decided to use saran wrap. Well the saran wrap came off inside and she was too squeamish to get it out, so she just left it in there. The acids in the vagina eventually dissolved the plastic and it went into her bloodstream and was poisioning her a few days later. She nearly died, but thankfully went to the hospital in time. uh...the moral of the story: leave the saran wrap to the leftovers. or at the very least...reach in and pull it out if it gets stuck. hehe
well that was my "enlightening" contribution.

JuNiPeR
January 28th, 2002, 01:19 AM
I'm on birth control, sometimes we use condoms but mostly we don't. I know my boyfriend is faithful so I'm not worried about STDs. I don't trust condoms anyways in my experience they don't always work!

Sleeping Ghost
January 28th, 2002, 10:43 PM
and now i swear by them... i dont want to take any more chances of getting my g/f pregnant than i have to (although i dont have to)

Myst
January 28th, 2002, 11:28 PM
Originally posted by JuNiPeR
I know my boyfriend is faithful so I'm not worried about STDs.

Was he tested for STD's since his last partner?

For those who use the excuse that "they don't always work" - well, if you like 0% chance of preventing yourself from getting AIDs better then 98% or 99% that's up to you.

Same goes for birth control :)

Pagecrd
January 31st, 2002, 12:38 AM
there is now a female condom which i find to be rather comfortable and not restricting in the least! comes with plenty of lube too! so try em just once all you condom lovers out there. Im allergic to birth hormonal birth control (makes me crazy and moody, also very hivey and once i grew hair in places i didnt want any) (ewwwwwwww) anyway you get the point!

JuNiPeR
January 31st, 2002, 12:54 AM
Originally posted by Myst


Was he tested for STD's since his last partner?

For those who use the excuse that "they don't always work" - well, if you like 0% chance of preventing yourself from getting AIDs better then 98% or 99% that's up to you.

Same goes for birth control :)

We've both been tested thank you. :)

I think that if your sleeping around, or in a not so serious relationship. Condoms are a must. It is better to be safe than sorry. :)

Myst
January 31st, 2002, 02:48 AM
you're welcome... ? :D

Zaniah
February 15th, 2002, 11:08 PM
I heard once that people who use a condom the first time they have sex are a heck of a lot more likely to use them regularly.

I used them when I first had sex, and every single time until I decided not to anymore. Recently my love and I are apart and should I decide to pursue someone else I would go back to using condoms.

Condoms to me are not only about birth control and std's; they're about committment. My main reason for using condoms while I did was pyschological -- the last possible barrier between oneself and someone else. I've been tested and I'm on the pill, but I just couldn't let go of the emotional protection a condom gave me. I wasn't willing to give myself *that* completely until I found the right one. I needed to keep myself just that much apart to stay sane.

Call me Libra... ;)

Raindancer
February 16th, 2002, 06:50 PM
I used a condom the first time, but still hate them. Every partner I've had hated them also. I've heard about the female condom, but don't know a lot about them. How do they work, and how good are they in avoiding the pitfalls of unprotected sex? How much do they relieve the worry of being close? Do they have the same problems as male condoms? What percent effective are they? Are there women who can't wear them?
Raindancer

Happydog
February 16th, 2002, 06:59 PM
Hi Raindancer, go here:

http://www.femalehealth.com/yourquests.html

Danustouch
May 2nd, 2002, 05:49 PM
*BUMP*

Myst
May 3rd, 2002, 08:26 AM
Originally posted by Raindancer
How do they work, and how good are they in avoiding the pitfalls of unprotected sex?

I've heard them compared to garbage bags. A few times.

shnen
May 3rd, 2002, 08:57 AM
me too! and not too comfortable... :eek:

Azure
May 6th, 2002, 05:50 PM
With Myst on that one. I was in High School in the late 80s, so like most of the people here, I can't remember a time when the threat of AIDS didn't hang over the heads of the sexually active. In college, I did AIDS education in the public schools and churches and places like that - and was pretty brutally honest.
condoms properly used are an effective deterrent to STDs and AIDS, although testing and serious monogamy are the best way of dealing with it, no question.

As to opinion - well, if a guy is lousy, the condom does just make it worse. . . but I don't tend to put up with lousy, so they either get better or it's over.

If he knows what he's doing, then the condom is no big. . .

For birth control, I take pills, which is pretty effective when combined with condoms. It takes a long term monogamous relationship for me to be okay with the lack thereof.

Favorite condom story:
Some friends of mine were on their honeymoon, and he bought some glow in the dark condoms in a truck stop rest area for the fun of it. The unfortunate part came the second time around, when her lips were "heading" in an interesting direction, and she realized that while he had discarded the used condom, the luminescence lingered. And not just on him. . .

Myst
May 6th, 2002, 06:05 PM
Originally posted by Azure
As to opinion - well, if a guy is lousy, the condom does just make it worse. . . but I don't tend to put up with lousy, so they either get better or it's over.

If he knows what he's doing, then the condom is no big. . .

Right on! I agree :)

Shy Hawk
May 23rd, 2002, 02:13 PM
Right now we're using condoms with spermicide, aswell as the withdrawl method. We also watch my cycle and avoid sex when I'm ovulating. It sounds relatively safe, however I'm thinking of going on the pill.....hmmph....but I have some questions about it.

I know it stops the egg from dropping, right...well, then some pills allow you to get a period monthly and some prevent you from getting one at all. My question is, when you are taking the inducing pills, do you have to stop having sex? Will taking the pill screw up my natural rhythm? I run on my horomones a lot, so will my moods be different?
Thanks for listening.
~Hawk:apirate:

Myst
May 23rd, 2002, 02:28 PM
Inducing pills? Not sure what you mean by those. If you mean the 7 you take that have no medication in them so you have your period, well I'm not sure. It is possible to ovulate during your period (tho very unlikely) so if you do during your period you should use a condom (just in case).

Usually the pill regulates your cycle, because it often stops you from getting your period for 3 weeks, then you get it in that week with the placebo pills. With mine, when I was on the pill you could set a clock by my cycle. This may be different for you if you're on some sort of meds that affect it, and the best thing to do would be to ask your doctor.

For some women it makes them more moody, for some others, less. One of my friends can't take them as they make her so moody, but for me it kept me much calmer and happier, and my 'moody time' was very predictable (there was one day a month when I was more sensitive, but we always knew what day it was and it got to the point where, when I got upset, I thought wait a minute it's *that* day, and we'd all get through it). It might also depend on which pill you take. It may also lessen or stop any PMS if you get that (which is what it did for me).

There can be some minor side effects, which are quite common, like nausea and weight gain or loss. The major ones (such as blood clots) your doctor will warn you about, and they are very rare, and especially so if you aren't a smoker. The Pill is often not recommended for women who smoke because of that.

My favourite was ortho tri cyclen - it's proven to help clear skin, and also the pills had a little more stuff in them each week, so it better simulated a woman's natural cycle. As far as I know the ones where you don't have a period at all are the same as the others, except that you take a pill with meds in it all the time, without taking placebos. You can achieve the same effect by taking the regular pills but discarding the placebos, and just opening a new pack after the active pills in the first one is done.

Some women don't like taking it because they forget it, but I find once you get it down to a schedule (ie. at bedtime) it's very easy to remember them.

Anyway, not sure if this has helped at all. What I can tell you is that for a lot of women they are the favourite contraceptive.

Shy Hawk
May 23rd, 2002, 03:20 PM
Actually, that is exactly what I wanted to know. And, of course, I'll talk to my doctor more about it. Just something that was on my mind.

widukind
June 1st, 2002, 08:54 AM
I voted 'I do' because I simply do, but I think the government better spend some money one making them less expensive. I mean, you can buy 200 latex gloves for about the same price as 8 condoms ! :)

Scarlettvixen
June 12th, 2002, 04:16 AM
Well before I entered into a serious relationship I used them - or made the guys use them lol

Twice I had guys refuse to use them, and then they got really P'eed at me when I said if its not on its not on lol

As for stopping while they apply them - I always made it part of our love making to put them on - perhaps cause I didnt trust the guy to do it properly, after I started that trick I never had another one break!

Now I am happily married and we are attempting to get pregnant, have to say condoms dont enter into our equation! lol
:p :p :p :p

kcrys
August 26th, 2002, 08:59 AM
well sorta redundent when one is trying to have a child!

*sheepish grin*

kcrys

kblackthorne
August 26th, 2002, 04:19 PM
I agree, Kcrys. Which is why we no longer have them in the house.

Widukind -- Perhaps you should look at some other options on where to buy them.

In most states, they're quite expensive at the drug store or grocery store -- nearly $1.00 apiece, when you break out the price.

If you go to "Planned Parenthood", a gay bookstore, or a health-clinic, however, they're more like 25˘. You can usually slap down a $10.00 bill and walk out with a little paper-bag full. (When I worked PP, the bags "officially" contained 40. What they really contained was at least 40, usually closer to 60. And they often had "goodies" like lube, as well.

Re: Condoms & His Sensation:
A drop or two of lube in the tip before he puts it on will do wonders for his sensation. Don't use too much -- you don't want it to slide off when things get heated... literally no more than a drop or two. But I've done this for a number of boyfriends, and they were all greatful.

If it's really an issue, you might also want to try swithing brands. It really does make a difference. Also, in my experience the flavored ones are really only good for activities that involve tasting. For anything else, they're too thick to be any fun.

Re: The Female Condom:
When I worked for PP, I heard that the biggest complaint about them was they were LOUD. (As in squeaky.) Anyone know from experience?

Azure
August 27th, 2002, 02:33 PM
No, but I've heard the same rumor.

SagaDraco
September 1st, 2002, 11:19 PM
I use the damned things because I don't want my gf on the pill, out of concern for her health and well-being. Just a sacrifice I'm willing to make. I truly despise them, but it beats no sex at all! Some of the newest ones actually let you feel some of the warmth, wetness, and sensations you'd feel as though you were not wearing one, but none of them come so close as to feel like they are not there at all.

kblackthorne
September 2nd, 2002, 11:09 AM
I'm telling ya, Saga... lube in the tip before you put it on. :D Makes it a lot more pleasant.

SagaDraco
September 2nd, 2002, 02:58 PM
I thought lube damaged the latex?

MzNeko
September 2nd, 2002, 03:32 PM
Well, it depends, back in my "schwingin' single" days - hell yeah, I used condoms! I don't like them and I've had the dang things break or slip off at a bad time (nothin' like going "fishing" for them, huh? eeeewww!), but since I didn't want children or a social disease, what else was there to do...

Once I got into a long-term commited relationship with my then-boyfriend now-husband, things changed a bit. We started out with condoms, had a few of the afore-mentioned accidents, had one serious pregnancy scare because of one. So for a while we used condoms and I got on depo-provera.

After it became obvious that we were in this for the long haul, we stopped using the condoms, but I stuck with the depo. We're talking about me going off it in six months or so - not so much "trying to start a family" as "no longer trying not to". :)

And while we're planning on sticking to monogamy, we do have an agreement that if either of us at any point feels a need to jump the fence, we WILL (no ifs, ands, or buts) be using condoms.

kblackthorne
September 2nd, 2002, 05:51 PM
I thought lube damaged the latex?

Not if you're using lube that was meant for the purpose!

Crisco's out... but you shouldn't be putting that into bodily openings, anyway! Same with Vasaline or petrolium jelly.

"Personal lubricants", such as KY jelly or the flavored lubes you can get in certain adult shops (or with your condoms a clinics) are water-based, and perfectly safe for latex.

Shy Hawk
September 3rd, 2002, 05:12 PM
Semi funny story....
The other day, after we had made love, I rolled off my husband, to which I heard him feeling around in the dark.
"What's wrong hun?" I said.
He said, "I uh....put on a condom didn't I?"
"I think so." Here we are feeling around in the dark.
All of a sudden he says, "do you think it's still uh....in you?" [Pause. Then a sound like a rubber glove snapping.] "It was?" [Laughter from both sides.]
For some reason in the heat of the moment, I pulled the thing straight off of him....highly unusual, it fit right, however, I suppose suction was just working in a weird way that day.
Just thought I'd share.
~Hawk

Danustouch
September 3rd, 2002, 05:37 PM
uhhhhhhhh...thanks...uhhhhh...I think.

Danustouch
September 3rd, 2002, 05:43 PM
For factual information on proper condom usage, as well as some of the MYTHS surrounding Condom Usage, please read this article.

http://www.thebody.com/cdc/factcond.html

Azure
September 3rd, 2002, 06:00 PM
Unfortunately, Shy Hawk, I've heard a few too many stories like that. A girlfriend of mine and her partner lost track of a condom and she didn't even think about it until she got an ugly infection several days later and went to see a doctor (eewwwwww). Now she isn't the brightest of bulbs, but it would seem to me that one should take the time to keep track of what happens to one's method of birth control.

Danustouch
September 3rd, 2002, 06:16 PM
Ewwwwwwwww.

kblackthorne
September 3rd, 2002, 10:26 PM
Um, been there, done that, stared at the ceiling while he went fishing.

What, she thought it just went away, and she didn't have to worry about it?!?

kblackthorne
September 3rd, 2002, 10:34 PM
Funny (and non-gross) condom story:

I went to college in the late '80's, early '90's. My second year there, our RA (Resident Advisor) told us of an RA meeting she'd been to. There was some sort of "ice-breaker" activity that involved putting a condom on -- I believe it was a broomstick or similar wooden object. (Actually, it couldn't have been a broomstick -- they're too narrow. Darn, I forget what they used!)

One of the male RA's patiently unrolled the condom and patiently tried to stretch it over the object....

Azure
September 3rd, 2002, 11:07 PM
*giggles*

And yes, Katherine, she just thought it went away. . . and when I told my GYN's nurse the story, she said that sort of thing was more common than you'd think - which is why I made mention of it when the topic sort of came up.

Ravens_Tears
September 3rd, 2002, 11:28 PM
I have used them but being very allergic to them and the spermicide..... lets say most of my life I've been pretty celibate.. still had 2 kids cause the ones I used didn't work.. talk about a trojan horse....major false sense of security and the 2nd I was on bc pills too.....

kblackthorne
September 4th, 2002, 08:22 PM
I have used them but being very allergic to them

You know, there are non-latex alternatives. The "female condom" I believe is vinyl, not latex.

They also have "natural" condoms made from membrane, not latex.

Danustouch
September 4th, 2002, 09:39 PM
Except that the membrane ones, Do not protect against HIV as effectively, as they are more pourous.

Shy Hawk
September 4th, 2002, 10:41 PM
I'm glad to hear that this is not too uncommon.
For a minute there, I felt sort of weird.
(chuckle)

talamh
September 9th, 2002, 03:53 PM
Another reason for not using condoms.. a monogomous relationship with another woman.... (well, that and menopause) .....thank goddess for the "Other" category..... :) ..
bb talamh

Sequoia
September 9th, 2002, 04:09 PM
Originally posted by Arduinna
I don't use them, I'm married. I should add I became sexually active before Aids/HIV. So I never used them much, the pill was much better.

Also the sensation/feeling issue also effects women and not just men. Condoms make it feel very different to me as a woman, yuck I hate those things.

Thank you!!! Thank you so much!!

I've met too many people who look at me like I'm some kind of insane slut or something. Condoms hurt me. I've heard theories ranging from "maybe you're allergic" to "it's just in your head, try to relax." *shudders* but I'm serious, I don't know exactly why, but I always feel sharp pain whenever my lover uses one. It's not exactly a picknick for him either. So. . . err, we pretty much do not use them.

I was on the pill for the longest time, but gods it makes me so depressed, and sex looses a lot of the "sparkel" for me, it isn't nearly as good. . . I get depressed, nausious, my PMS is hell. . . it just isn't worth it for me. So for now, we're pretty much attemping abstinance. Or at least trying to do that as much as possible, keeping to my cycles as much as we can. It's frustrating, but not nearly as frustrating as a baby would be!

Even though I understand why everyone seems tense about "ooh you're not using condoms, ohh you bad boy/girl". . . Some of us are in clean, monogamous relationships, and we're making the choices that are personally best for us. Just because someone doesn't use them, or make her partner use them, doesn't mean she's some sort of idiotic little girl who doesn't care if she gets AIDS or gets pregnant.

As many different situations as there are people! :)

Shy Hawk
September 9th, 2002, 11:59 PM
I have to say I don't mind condoms at all. We always use lubricated [with spermicide], and as such, it is even more slippery and good. I find it to be generally good. Though I like the feeling of not having one on a bit more, I don't find it repelling at all.

kblackthorne
September 17th, 2002, 03:48 PM
I don't know exactly why, but I always feel sharp pain whenever my lover uses one. It's not exactly a picknick for him either.

Were you, by any chance, using Trojans when you experienced this? Or "flavored" condoms?

I have had the same experience with both these.

The brand really does make a difference.

In my experience the best is "Touch" by Protex. Unfortuantely, I cannot find these anymore. :( But I loved "Touch" because they were the one condom I couldn't feel.

Trojans are -- in my experience -- about the worst condoms on the market. AND the most likely to break.

Lifestyles are OK but not great. I just really haven't found anything to replace Protex.

Sequoia
September 17th, 2002, 10:50 PM
you know, I havn't tried them myself, but I've heard that the brand "Kimono" is really good, because supposedly the pill didn't catch on as much in Japan as it did here, and it's a japanese brand (but I've seen it in stores so I know they sell them here). I don't remember where I read it, but I remember reading that they're supposedly one of the best kind you can get. Havn't tried 'em. . .

and no, they weren't trojans or any special kind, so far as I know. We've tried different kinds. . . (though yes, they were the kind you get from your college or something). Pretty much the same results all around.

Danustouch
September 17th, 2002, 11:05 PM
Have you discussed this with your OB-GYN, Puma? I know that you are in a committed relationship right now, but life just kinda happens sometimes, and you can never know for sure and without a doubt that you will always be protected by the pill. All I mean to say here, is that for me, I'd want to discuss the issue with my OB-GYN before ruling out condoms all together, first of all, because she might have some reccomendations of a brand to try that might work better, some idea of why they cause you pain, or, for instance, there could be an underlying medical problem that you aren't aware of yet. Latex Allergy is only one of the possibilities. It could be, for instance, that it is the spermicide on the condom that you are reacting to (if you use the spermicide coated variety) or any number of other things. I would just talk about it with your doctor, before ruling them out of your sex life altogether :)

Sequoia
September 17th, 2002, 11:10 PM
well. . . I don't really have a steady ob-gyn. My parent's medical insurance changes have kinda prevented me from getting to know one very well *chuckles* but my last one really creeped me out. I don't know what it was, but she seemed. . . I don't know. Just the looks she kept giving me. It was really hard to ask her any sort of question (and I did try, but it was almost like she wasn't listening to me very closely).

I actually am not on the pill right now, as it had been making me basically 'sick'. . . bleh. We're just . . . not having intercourse for the time being. Safest way, we figure. . .

If anybody knows a good OB-GYN in Santa Rosa, CA. . . :)

edited to add: I don't know if it makes any difference or not, but I think that last lady was actually a registered nurse and midwife, not an actual ob-gyn doc. . . I was told that she was supposed to be really good with teens, but I had the distinct feeling that she was just halfway humoring me with my questions.

Shy Hawk
September 18th, 2002, 11:43 AM
Well, the lady that I go to for all of my gynocological thingys is just a Nurse Practicianer. I don't know that it makes all that much of a difference.
I just started on the pill two days ago, and I'll let you know how that goes. Also, I got my first Pelvic Exam on Monday. It was a snap. I don't know why so many people moan about it....easy peezy. I'm glad I did it. I feel much more secure...

Semele
September 18th, 2002, 11:57 AM
Puma,

I am betting the lady you speak of is a Nurse Practitioner, like the one Shy Hawk mentioned. They have a lot of the same training as Physicians and have some prescriptive authority, for example they can prescribe BCP and antibiotics to treat STD's. I am speaking particularly of the Nurse Practitioner in a Ob/Gyn setting, such as Planned Parenthood. There are obviously other fields of specialty. I had thought about furthering my education to upgrade to that level, but have since accepted the sad fact that I just love being a floor nurse...more direct patient care and I can work the hours I want. On the down side...NP's and Nurse Anesthetists tend to make about 50K more a year than my lowly lil salary...but I digress!:rolleyes:

Puma, I would very much agree with Danus...you should ask around. If you don't feel comfortable with your Doc or don't have one, just call up the local Planned Parenthood, or equivalent. they can answer a lot of questions over the phone and they are so used to it, they never even blink. they have heard it all. I bet they probably have samples to share of the different types of condoms and other methods such as foam and female condoms. Even if you aren't sexually active right now, you may choose to be in the near future and it is just a good idea to have a plan in order for the special moments.

kblackthorne
September 18th, 2002, 03:22 PM
#1: Forget your parents' insurance. You're not limited by that.

Since you live in CA, you qualify for a special program called "SOFP" or Family Pact. (State can't make up its mind what to call it.)

SOFP is a state-funded program that provides reproductive health care. This includes routine pelvic exams, contraception (including surgical contraception), testing for and treatment of STD's, etc.

Unlike Medi-Cal, you don't have to go to a special office to sign up -- you sign up right at the clinic, and get approved on the spot. (It's a quick & easy form.) And I'll tell you right now, Puma, you qualify.

---------------

OK, I can't find a PP in Santa Rosa.

Here are some other options:

Women's Choice Clinic, Feminist Women's Health Center
4415 Sonoma Highway, Suite D
Santa Rosa, CA 95409
707-537-1171

Commonwomen's Health Project (14)
2200 Country Center Dr, Suite H
Santa Rosa, CA 95403
(707) 578-1700

Santa Rosa HELP
c/o Marsha Lose, R.N.
Community Hospital
3325 Chanate Road
Santa Rosa, CA 95404
(707) 576-4307 or (707) 573-8442 (This one is off a Herpes Support site, but the RN might be able to direct you to a good clinic.)

Family Planning
Sonoma County Public Health Clinic
3420 Chanate Road, Santa Rosa - (707) 576-4820


Sonoma County People for Economic Opportunity (SCPEO)
555 Sebastopol Road, #A, Santa Rosa, Family Planning - (707) 544-7526

Warrack Walk-In Center: 2449 Summerfield Road, Santa Rosa
(707) 542-9030



Now, you'll have to do your research -- some of these are probably more appropriate than others.


Chances are you will want to have sex again some day before menopause. And since the pill isn't working for you, and condoms are painful, you really need to find someone you trust & can work with to find a solution.

Shy Hawk
September 18th, 2002, 05:41 PM
Perhaps it's not the condom, but the way it is pulling you. Have you actually had a pelvic exam recently. Why do I ask? Sometimes painful intercourse can be the sign of a cyst or what have you. I'm not saying it sounds like you have any sort of problems in there, but you should really get it checked out.
~Hawk

Sequoia
September 18th, 2002, 07:51 PM
ahh!! so much response! thank you!!


in response to your question, ShyHawk. . . I've had *thinks about it* umm. . . two? or so exams since I became active (because the first time, it was with that california health thing, I have the little cardie still; but they wouldn't give any records of any sort to kaiser, so off we go for another -_-; ), and both have been completely fine. . . It's been painful to use a condom since the first time, I think. . . I know it was with my ex, and it still is painful, even though it's a different situation. (that kind of leads me to belive it's more the condom than the action or person, besides, there isn't pain when there's no condom)

I do have some condoms here, just in case. I don't know what brand they are. . . -_-;; *dropkicks the college* well anyway. . . I will have to check those places out, or at least give them a ring.

Shy Hawk
September 19th, 2002, 11:52 AM
So they put me on Orthotrycyclin (or whatever). Any thoughts, personal experiences, worries, etc, on this particular brand. It's my third day, and I have to say, I am feeling particularly ill. Though she said that's expected the first week or so, as I'm adjusting to it. Also, they lowered my dose of Paxil, so I'm doubly ill. It's one of those meds that will give you withdrawl simptoms...
So, any thoughts?

PS I'm glad you've had your exams Puma, my mind, at least, is at ease.

~Hawk

Danustouch
September 19th, 2002, 12:19 PM
I took Ortho Tricyclin for a while. It was "GREAT" for my skin, which is one of the benefits of that pill, it's a great acne cure. Unfortunately, it reacted badly with me, because it put my athsma in jeopardy. Many hormone therapies do. A rapid change in your estrogen levels can trigger athsma problems. Which is why athsmatics have more problems during pregnancy. So..for someone who doesn't have athsma, I would recommend ortho. But...if you have athsma, make sure you monitor your breathing, and keep in touch with your doctor about any problems you might experience. Same as with any Birth Control Pill.

Sequoia
September 19th, 2002, 12:55 PM
I was on Ortho for a year. I concur, it made my skin wonderful by comparison (dealin' with zits o' doom right now). The only problems I ever had with it, was that after about a year, I developed some sort of weird immunity or something to it. I just kind of started spotting and didn't stop for two months o_o; But that might've just been me and hormone therapy in general, because anymore I don't react that favourably to the birth control pill at all. But I've tried several kinds, and I must say that that's the one I would choose out of all of them.

Shy Hawk
September 19th, 2002, 02:03 PM
I actually do have pretty bad asthma, and unfortunately, now that you mention it. I did have some problems with my breathing today, a bit of wheezing.......will it go away or get worse? I am not worried, as I have allergies, and my husband still has those three cats. [of which need a home, wink wink] I did get an offer on one, but there are still two to go.
~Hawk

Shy Hawk
September 19th, 2002, 02:05 PM
Also, I take Singulair for my asthma....do you think that would help? I just ran out, and hadn't taken it for a couple days, but I'll be back on today.

Danustouch
September 19th, 2002, 02:16 PM
Singulair is a great drug. But with all medications, discuss it with your doctor, and see how it goes along with other medications you are on. Discuss your breathing difficulty with your doctor. And see if there may be a better dosage of Ortho for you to take, or if he/she can change the doses on your athsma meds, or give you additional medications to deal with it. If that's what you want to do. It may get better as your body get's used to the hormones. Then again, it may not. And as i'm sure you know, athsma is not a thing you want to toy with. So..PLEASE discuss your athsma with your doctor, mention that you are worried, because you just started using the Pill, and you know that sudden changes in estrogen can lead to breathing problems, and have your doctor monitor the situation. Or she may just choose to try another pill altogether.

Good luck.

Shy Hawk
September 19th, 2002, 03:10 PM
Thanks, I found that all helpful.
~Hawk

Semele
September 19th, 2002, 06:44 PM
Hawk,

I definately concur with Danus...a phone call to the Doc is in order. Singulair is a great drug, but unfortunately one you should never run out of. My coworker takes it and if she goes without it for even a couple of days she gets a nasty Bronchitis and cough and has to use her inhalors etc. So please get that thing filled. the missed doses could be causing the recent wheezing, but it could also be an interaction as Danus mentioned.

Also I am curious as to why your Paxil dose was lowered. Was that the original plan or did it have to do with the BCP. That alone can cause major mood swings...it will usually level out in a few weeks, but it can be rough. I bring this up because the BCP can also cause severe mood swings in the first couple of months, until the hormone levels get regulated and your body adjusts. Just kind of seems like a lot to expect your body to adjust to all at once.

I took Ortho for three months to get my periods started and regular while we were trying to get pregnant. I had horrible mood swings, but that could be because in my case it was a huge hormone difference. I am certainly not trying to scare you. I just want you to make sure your Doc knows all of your medical history and that you are getting the best treatment possible. Depression and mood swings can really change the way we live our lives. right now is a very happy time for you...new experiences and lots of love!! I hope everything goes well for you!

Shy Hawk
September 19th, 2002, 11:07 PM
Not to get off topic but:
I got a jump on my Singulair today, and that's all good. This is the same NP who prescribed the Paxil for me...here's the story on that.
She had me on Paxil CR [controlled release], at 25mg I believe. Then my insurance didn't cover the CR, so she switched me to regular Paxil. She said that she thought it was equivalent to 40mg of regular Paxil, but that the other doctor thought I should start at 20mg...which is a step down for me once again... I was doing really well with that dose, and I think it was kind of selfish, but it was a superior of her's I think. I didn't know if arguing with her would help. It was that same day that they put me on the Ortho, which is also supposed to help with my moodiness [the actual reason for the prescription, though birth control is a nice bonus]. So, I wonder if perhaps the Ortho will balance out the lower dose of Paxil, but at this point I feel very much like an over medicated guinea pig. I can't help but wonder if this is bad for me.... Oh yes, and she gave me allegra to help with what feels like an ear infection, though she counldn't find anything. I keep describing to her that I have numbness on the outside of both ears, and itchyness in the inner part...once and a while some acheyness in my left ear (which was the ear that first felt weird). She looked in them, and couldn't find anything. So, she thinks it's allergy related, something about the high pollen count.
Ideas?
Whoa Semele....that was a long post....but thanks for caring, I appreciate the thoughts and questions. Aswell as Danus. My chest feels a little better after having taken my Singulair and Allegra (I can't help but think that the quick recovery was at least half psychosomatic).
~Hawk

Semele
September 23rd, 2002, 05:20 PM
Hey Psychosomatic or not...take what you can get!!

Hope everything keeps improving for you!

Danustouch
September 23rd, 2002, 10:52 PM
I wouldn't worry about being overmedicated..AS LONG as your doctors are all aware of all the medications you are on, and what doses. I'm glad things are improving for you!

Incidentally, the ear infection feeling you have, could very well be connected to allergies. What happens is that your sinuses get backed up, and you get fluid draining into your eustation (sp) tubes (tubes in the ear). Often, the most drainage happens at night, so you might not show a visible build up :) Allegra should help :)

Dravius
November 25th, 2002, 05:17 AM
Twenty years and the situation hasn't come up yet, but I definitely will use one when it does :)

Leviyah
November 25th, 2002, 06:59 AM
Like some one said on the first page - monogomy and testing. Plus the fact that while we're not officially trying to conceive we're not avoiding conception either

Sequoia
January 12th, 2003, 07:38 PM
Just a lil' update to make some folks feel better ;)

Sweetie and I tried something new - I was talking to a friend of mine, and she showed me where I could buy lambskin condoms. . . . yes, I know, they were obvious to begin with, but I never really got around to trying them. Somehow, that part didn't sink into my skull ^^;; And since we're in a monogamous (sp?) relationship, STD's aren't a concern.

I was a little nervous, but lo and behold. . . they didn't hurt. Things were different, to be sure, but they didn't hurt me at all! :D good thing here! So y'know. . . maybe I am allergic to latex, at least, in that particular area. *looks a little embarrassed*

But. . . yeah. OH! And thankfully, I just found out my insurance will cover me until I'm 19!!w00tz0r! I'm actually going to look into that new thing, the patch. It looked worth a few questions, at least. Maybe I was feeling sick from the pills because I wasn't taking them correctly or something. Anyhow, it's always worth asking about. :)

shnen
January 15th, 2003, 10:43 AM
Originally posted by Puma Hime
So y'know. . . maybe I am allergic to latex, at least, in that particular area. *looks a little embarrassed*

don't be embarassed, I know SO many women who are alergic to latex... :)

SuperHeroGirl
January 19th, 2003, 08:51 PM
i ahve yet to ahve a chnce to use them but when the time comes i WILL. no STDS for me please!

tabcat
January 19th, 2003, 08:54 PM
[QUOTE]Originally posted by Drisel
[B]I used to use them all the time but I am that one that they don't always work for. I belive that my seven year old was a trojan and the new baby ( 13 months) was sheik.


You know, my husband and I quite using condems a year ago when we decided to get pregnant. We're still not pregnant...maybe we should go back to condoms!

Carickah
January 28th, 2003, 01:13 AM
Originally posted by Raindancer
People find the most ingenious ways to be stupid.

Sounds like a sig quote to me.....


Carickah

CloakofStars9
February 5th, 2003, 02:44 PM
to me sex is not worth dying over, or getting pregnant when im not ready etc.

i have only had sex with one guy in my 23 years and i refused to have sex without a condom even though i was on the pill....

it constantly surprises me how many people dont protect themselves, and dont care to.

but my worst pet peeve is when guys say "it doesnt feel the same" GET OVER IT!!!!

no glove no love

Bethra
February 5th, 2003, 07:38 PM
Having been in a long relationship I no longer feel the need to use the little fellows. I was on the pill before but still used them when I was sexualy active in a new relationship. Now I'm steralised and I don't have to use anything. Coming off the pill has been very hard on the old body how ever I've discovered all kinds of things I'd forgotten about happening to me. One blood test later and I find out I didn't really need to get sterilzed since I'm going through the change :) But pill or stelile or on always use a comdom. The biggest riseing STD is Clamidia and that's horrible AIDS kills and other STDs have pritty nasty side afects. Look at our King George he was mad thanks to an STD :)

Azure
February 6th, 2003, 01:20 PM
Actually, there are several new books out lately that argue that many of the world's great figures were who they were precisely because they suffered from STDs - mostly syphilis. If you want to be horrified, look at nineteenth century photos of people with advanced cases.

But we live in an era where responsible sex makes it possible to substantially lower our chances of STDs, and it makes sense to use condoms. Look back on this thread a couple of pages, there's some discussion about the "lost sensation" issue and ways to avoid that.

AstraSkye
February 7th, 2003, 11:39 AM
I went for "allergies". I'm allergic to latex, so if I want to use a condom, I have to go get Durex Avanti - $10 for five, or $5 for two. That's more than I can afford, so no condoms for me.

Also, I've been in a monogamous relationship for the past three years, and we were both virgins when we got together. I was on the pill during the first year, got off it two years ago, took a long break (using condoms sometimes, but mostly "safe" periods and pulling out), and now I'm on the mini-pill.

Raevyn
February 7th, 2003, 03:41 PM
You know, that's your choice, but are you aware that people can get AIDS in other ways then having sex, and thus being two virgins isn't going to mean you can't transmit/receive it?

That's what my own doctor told me when I said the same thing.

AstraSkye
February 7th, 2003, 03:45 PM
Originally posted by Raevyn
You know, that's your choice, but are you aware that people can get AIDS in other ways then having sex, and thus being two virgins isn't going to mean you can't transmit/receive it?

That's what my own doctor told me when I said the same thing.

Yes, I know (needles, breast feeding, child birth, blood transfusions, oral/anal sex, blood contact with open wounds, etc.). However, my boyfriend has been a blood donor since he was 18 (he'll be 27 in July), so I know he doesn't have HIV or AIDS, and since all donations during the past three years have come out clear, it also means I can't have it, or else he would have - most probably - gotten it from me.

Raevyn
February 7th, 2003, 04:06 PM
*nods* I don't mean to sound preachy, just I didn't know that when I was younger and I know a lot of people don't.

AstraSkye
February 7th, 2003, 04:13 PM
Originally posted by Raevyn
*nods* I don't mean to sound preachy, just I didn't know that when I was younger and I know a lot of people don't.

It's OK... :) It's nice to see more people with some knowledge on this...

...I wrote a 180-page essay on HIV/AIDS once, and have been trying to educate people constantly since then... :-o

Blueowl
February 9th, 2003, 12:06 PM
I have been pretty lucky in my life, out of the very few partners I have had, I not once used protection. I was on the pill, used the rhythm method, and was knocked up twice..the only time I got anything was from my ex husband who supposedly was monogomous(SP)and obviously wasn't. I ahve not tested positive for HIV?AIDS and I am pretty healthy except for 1 problem, but I am working on getting that taken care of. Not everyone is so lucky...and maybe there is more to come from my ex..he was by far the worst choice I made for a sexual partner...but I was always satisfied lol...not the smartest thing to do, but l;ike I said, I have been lucky...and exceedingly picky about who I spread these nice gams for. I also would see them for awhile before anything sexual happened, and I knew their back ground also, which is very important. Lambskin is great...but everyone's immune system is different, and so if the fertility aspect of things...we are all different and the same ya know!

Dresden
February 20th, 2003, 11:30 PM
I'm nineteen and my husband is twenty-eight. He is the only person I've slept with, but he has had twelve sexual partners. He got tested before we slept together, and came out clean, and we've had a monogamous relationship since. I know some people might argue that you never know if your partner is being faithful or not, but I know. I wouldn't still be married to him if I even had the slightest doubt about his loyalty. And I am definitely not the kind of person who trusts people very easily.

We don't use condoms, unless I've missed a pill. I like the pill, since it's done wonders for my skin, and made my practically non-existent boobs grow to a noticeable size! :thumbsup:

adament
February 21st, 2003, 02:30 PM
using a condom implies that i actually HAVE a love life!!!!!!!

Bryony
February 23rd, 2003, 02:24 AM
my response: other
i would not know, lol
:D

Sequoia
February 23rd, 2003, 07:23 AM
right now I'm actually trying out the patch. . . see if the hormones screw with me the same way that the pill seems to now.

If not, I have a method for future use!

('cept the d*mn thing itches like all heck)

Niphredil
February 25th, 2003, 04:52 PM
I've read a few pages from this thread, and there seems to be some misunderstanding 'bout HIV and AIDS. HIV means Human Immunodeficiency Virus and thus is the virus which causes AIDS (Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome) and that's the desease which occurs in some time after you've been tested HIV positive (seropositive). Being HIV positive doesn;t mean you've got AIDS, but you will spread the virus to anyone else by having unsave sex or any other form of blood contact !!

While reading the posts I got the idea that this wasn;t clear to anyone, so since it's an important thing these days...

As for the poll, I'm not using them anymore, my bfriend and I are together for atleast 2,5 years now (living togehter as well), and you have to thrust eachother at some point, else youre life together is horrible.

Take care,
Niphredil