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FaerieGothMommy
December 22nd, 2005, 08:18 AM
Lately my self esteem has been so low, it's becoming a joke! It is really affecting my every day life, and i hate it! I've tryed so much, and i cannot stop myself from getting depressed, and i just cry. What can be done about low self-esteem? It doesn't help that i have social anxiety, and i feel completely usless and so insignificant to everyone else.

SSanf
December 22nd, 2005, 08:36 AM
What can be done about low self-esteem?The cure for low self esteem is good, solid accomplishment.

How do you expect to have respect for yourself if you don't do something worthy of respect?

Find a task that is hard to do and do it.

Find a thing that is good to do and do it.

Esteem whether from yourself or from others is something that is earned by your deeds.

If you have done nothing, lately, worthy of respect, well, you ain't no fool. You won't respect yourself.

Why should you?

Do something admirable.

(And, if you are allowing yourself to live in a pig sty, start by cleaning up that mess!! Keep yourself clean and tidy. Dress nicely. Live like a person who DESERVES to be respected.)

bbnflpn
December 22nd, 2005, 08:51 AM
i my self have had issues with my low self esteem since i can remember, and i have slowly worked some of it away, not totaly but alot of it. and there are times that i still feel like i am the most worthless person in the world. it takes time. and trying to get over it is not easy and it is differnt for every one. for me it was mostly about my looks, and my intelegence. i started to get over it when i had a freind (not a family member cause of corse they are biased) tell me that i was beautiful, i told him he was lieing to me. and he said something that i will never forget. "when you get home look at your self in the mirror as if you were a stranger seeing you for the first time, and then you will see how beautiful you are" so i did, i cleared my mind and looked through some one elses eyes at my self and i realized that i was pretty. i still do it some times, not always with the same result, but alot of times i feel that i am still pretty. my intellegence problem was alittle harder, finding out that i had dyslexia was a big starter for me, and then finnaly getting a B gpa helped abit, i was always good at learning, it was the homework that i had a problem with, and when i got to college i did my best to excel. the last college i went to i graduated with perfect attendace (somthing that i had never been able to do before) and i almost made honors, (i didnt make it cause of my terrible math) it didnt matter the fact was that i came close like .5 of a point and that was good enough for me to realize that i could do it.

i did have a large stroke to my ego latly, over the weekend a guy that i had a huge crush on me contacted me, and he told me how he regreted not asking me out, this was a big thing for me, i always felt that he didnt really like me or find me attractive. and now i know other wise.

Morr
December 22nd, 2005, 09:37 AM
FGM, sweetie, all I can say is that you are a beautiful woman inside and out. And you know I have no reason to lie to you, or that I say things just to make you feel better.

We have known each other for quite a while now, I promise you that you are a wonderful person with so much to give. You are so smart, so talented and you have this urge inside you to give and help others.

First of all, you should be proud of yourself that you WANT to do something with your life, and that you WANT to be productful. Many people could have used the SA excuse as a means to get away with working and being a productful member of socity. But you are not like that. You are trying to battle this SA and you dream of one day walking out there and making your goals come true. I admire that about you.

Second, there just comes a time where you have to look straight towards your demons' face and say "enough!". You take control of your self esteem. Dont let anyone else control it, not even those voices in your mind that tell you that you are ugly or not good enough. It is very difficult, I have gone through it myself (you know it ;)), but it must be done. You have to really knock out that low self esteem shell that surrounds you, in order to grow out of it and like yourself and be true to yourself. Relay on your friends for this. Friends are wonderful sources of strength. Believe us when we tell you that you ARE beautiful, that you ARE great, that you ARE worth it. We have no reason to lie to you. Draw strength from your kids who look up at you with admiration and unconditional love.

Whenever you feel this yicky feeling of low self esteem taking over you, just fight it. Say no, even outloud -- Yell it. You dont have to start believing that you are Miss Universe or some Model and that you are Miss Perfect. All you have to learn is to accept that this is who you are and the way you are -- And that its perfectly ok to be this way, look this way and just be who you are.

And just remember, you are wonderful. I dont pick my pod partner lightly! And coming to think of it, I only have ONE pod partner in the whole world -- YOU!

Remember the motto: Morr & FGM -- Two Freaks In A Pod!

*Lots of Hugs*

You know where I am if you need to talk. If I am not on Yahoo, you can always rant and rave and seek advice through PM. I will respond the moment I get it :)

I heart you!

Silver Ivy
December 23rd, 2005, 02:40 AM
Lately my self esteem has been so low, it's becoming a joke! It is really affecting my every day life, and i hate it! I've tryed so much, and i cannot stop myself from getting depressed, and i just cry. What can be done about low self-esteem? It doesn't help that i have social anxiety, and i feel completely usless and so insignificant to everyone else.

Hi FarieGothMommy :)

I can relate to everything that you have written here, for the last year I have suffered from crippling low self esteem. I has never been so bad, until a certain incident that I had with a male ...

Anyway - I am working with way through it.

One thing that I have found helpful is affirmations. You might sound weird at first saying them, but if you have faith and give them a try they really start to help. Louise Hay, has alot of affirmations in her books ...
there are some at this website too
www.aplacefortheheart.co.uk

Also - excersice makes me feel better - like taking my dog for a walk. I like Kayaking too ... so being outdoors helps me.

I know how hard it is to have low self esteem and the effect that it has on your life.

Hope that you feel better and find a way to gain more confidence.

Cryptic
February 10th, 2006, 01:38 AM
I used to be at that point as well, and possibly half an inch of going overboard to the "other side."

[One site that I used to go and talk to others similar to me during my rough thought period was http://www.recoveryourlife.com/ (formerly www.ruinyourlife.com). This site is not only for self-harm individuals, but for anyone who is going through a difficult period in their life and would like some support.]

After spending some time by myself and thinking about my life, I went through some transformation.

Take some time to yourself and analyze your life. Is there something (a person, place or thing) in your environment that is negative? What do you think makes you sad? What is it that you want to do in your life? Only you have the answer.

After my self-analysis, I have learned is that it's all in your mind. You have the power to control your life and do what you want. Don't spend your time doing nothing, but take the time you need to learn more about yourself and what YOU want to do and discover your desires in life. These words and the words of others may sound foreign, but if you try little by little with just changing your environment or controlling what things you encounter around you (like what you hear and see - avoiding negative things), you will see progress. I am just stating what worked for me and how I changed my life around.

Remember to laugh and play! Live your life to the fullest!

If you wish to chat or PM me feel free. :)

Sorry for the long post, thanks for listening!

mtpathy
February 10th, 2006, 02:10 AM
stop taking yourself so damn seriously.
learn to laugh at yourself,and most
importantly learn to laugh and find humour
in the things that make you want to cry
and hide the most.