Passing of a loved one

[waterlily]

Merry Meet,

First I hope this is the right area to post this. I looked through the boards and this one seem the most appropriate.
I need help dealing with grief and anger that I'm feeling. This is from my mom passing unexpectedly in October. She died a week before my wedding. I also was the one who found her dead. I know what I'm feeling is 'normal' I just need help in dealing with them. Plus I want to stop taking my feeling out on my husband. I light candles and meditate. It dosen't seem to help. Is there anything else I can do?

In love and light,

Waterlily

:heartthro :sunny:

[MammaStar]

Time my friend. It's all I can say. I'm sooooo incredibly sorry about your mother's passing. I don't know what other words of comfort that I may offer. I think you are feeling normal. Maybe you should seek out a grief counseling service or group. Maybe they can help you work out some of the angry feelings you're having.

[waterlily]

I know time will help, and heal. It's only been 2 months. It was just difficult with the holidays. Being all the firsts. First married and first without her. I've been going to counseling since I got back from our honeymoon. I was just wondering if there were any type of meditation that I could do to help me through this time as well as deal with the emotions.


Love and light,
Waterlily

:heartthro :sunny:

[Angelwulfe]

ldy starlite gave some pretty good advice. i'm really not sure what to say. i just hope all goes well with you in the future. love and blessings your way.

[Danustouch]

These things do take time, to heal. You will always miss your loved one...and the holidays will probably make you feel her passing more keenly. So..perhaps around the holidays, you could light a candle on your altar, specifically for her, Or bring a poinsettia, or some other gift to her gravesite, just to let her know that you do miss her, and think of her all the time. I'm sure she already knows..but sometimes, part of why grief is felt so deeply, can be bound up with regrets of things we didn't say, or didn't do, when the person was alive. Being active in your grief can help quite a bit. Grief, is generally, passive. It comes upon us in waves. And can be quite overwhelming. If instead of waiting for the next wave to hit, you instead, take the bull by the horns, and give yourself "TIME" to grieve, a special time, or a special action for just you and mom, it kind of cuts down on that overwhelmed feeling.

I am very sorry for your loss. As others have said here, time is the best healer hon. I hope in time, that your heart heals a bit more, and that the pain will not feel as fresh.

Take care.

[sherry]

I too feel that time eases these feelings. My Father passed 9 years ago in October although I can tell you that the sorrow eases up, when the Holidays come around you still have that little empty feeling. It also makes you notice things your friends might say in anger about their parents. I am sure my friends did not even realize the comments they say about their parents could be taken so literal by someone who has had such a loss.

I wrote poetry about my Dad and helped Mom deal with the even greater loss than I could have imagined. After nine years I still write poetry about holidays I remembered as a kid and how much I Love my Dad.

[Kristin Ann]

Hi Waterlily,

{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}, the only answer is time. This past year my dear grandmother passed away so the holidays this year were our first without her being here physically, it was hard for sure. I'd being doing perfectly fine, then a second later something would remind me of her and I'd be crying. Keep the memories of your mom alive, but instead of letting them make you sad, remind yourself that you're so lucky to have those memories. Your mom may not be around physically, but trust me, she's still here. Take care, :).

Love & light always,
Kristin Ann

[Xander67]

I agree with Kristin
Time...

I think it also helps to have a get together now and then with your family and friends of your mother...

trust me when I tell you, Your mother was right there at your wedding, and Im sure she was very happy for you .

as for anger, there is no way around it, you have to let it out some way,

keeping it in , surpressing it, will only contribute to a major blow up in the future...I speak from experience on that one...

If I may assume, Im sure you have many wonderful memories of your mom,

and those memories will keep your mother's spirit alive in your heart..

i dont know exactly what to say here, but I just thought id share with you some of the things Ive found that helped me ..

hope this helps some...

[Xander67]

Hopeing all is well with you water Lily