Control

[Hedwig]

I thought I had an ethics question but then I read the ethics thread and realized that is not my problem. My problem is this: I don't seem to be able to control my will. When I work a spell, usually nothing happens. On the other hand, the simple vocalization of a wish seems to work even when I didn't mean it to be a spell and it often has a bad ending.

Here are some examples: I was at a wedding over the summer and this woman was leaving the church because she was mad. I said to my mother, "look at that woman, she's pissed because Mindy was in her way. Is that Todd's mom?" and my mom said "where? where?" and I said (pointing at where she was), "right there, right there, right there." The woman went splat right on her face in the spot where I had pointed. That stopped her from leaving my mom's view and she got to tell me who she was.

A couple of months ago, a truck was about to pull out in front of me and I was really mad because I had just had an argument with my Maw Maw. He was coming fast and wasn't going to stop and I knew that if he did pull out in front of me, I wouldn't be able to stop in time. I pointed at the struck and screamed "STOP!" and the truck stopped like it had hit a brick wall and smoke came out from under the hood. Both of these incidents have scared my mom out of her mind.

Then last week I made an appointment with the gynecologist because I had a lump on my breast. I prayed hard that I would forget it about it just for two days so I could enjoy spending time with my family. We had no more pulled into the driveway of my Maw Maw's house when my Mom fell and busted her whole face on the cover to a water meter. I was looking right at her. It actually looked like someone pushed her. I spent all of the holdiays in the ambulance and at the hospital and worrying about my mom. Needless to say, my prayer came true, I didn't think about the lump once (even though I was in the hospital) but I never meant for that to happen like that!

So I have no trouble making things happen when my emotions are high and I am just blurting stuff out. Each of these times (and there are many more examples) I could actually feel the magic in me and around me. But then if I actually sit down and try to purposefully work magic, nothing ever happens, the air feels stale and dead. I thought that maybe the problem is that when I bind a spell, I am keeping it from working somehow and that since just saying, I want something without binding it is what's sending that energy out with no control.

I've been trying Dorothy Morrison's exercises for controlling visualization and it's really not helping because I don't feel it's really addressing my specific problem. Sure, I want my spellwork to actually materialize, but more than that, I want to stop the other things from happening.

Any suggestions? Thanks!

[Rick]

Have you considered verbalizing that you wish for your "wishcraft" to be under concious control? Just a thought...

[Myst]

Spellcasting is half intent, so if you don't want it so much that you get emotionally into it, no wonder it doesn't work. Also, when you get emotionally into something you want to happen, you are basically casting a spell. Stop and think before you cast a spell or even say something. Seems to me you need to concentrate more on focusing your intent. Be more careful not to blurt something out when you don't want something, and if you do intend to cast a spell spend more time on forming your intent.

Try meditating regularly and working on controlling your energy.

When you want to do a spell spend at least half an hour visualizing and concentrating on your end. Spend lots of time crafting your mind keys to match your intent. Use the skills you learned by meditating, ground thoroughly, and focus your energy. And keep in mind if the spell doesn't work it wasn't supposed to - either the time is right or you aren't supposed to get what you think you want. It isn't necessarily a failure on your end but possibly the fact that other intents are involved or it's just not meant to happen.

[Pheonix]

I have a similair problems, and I find that working on anger management is what i need. Developing the ability to stop calm down and think before I act. I would never hit a person just out of anger but yet i still seem to somehow cast spells let nand right. The control takes time and practice. and even after practising it for about a year it still happens sometimes.

As for your spellwork itself can you force yourself to cry? if you can try the same principle. Bring out your emotions. Get them running high and then just let it go!!!

Hope these things have helped.

Brightest Blessings,
Pheonix

[Myst]

Good advice :)

Sometimes I get mad and think things not nice too, and it can be a bad thing. So I have to work on that too :)

[Joy]

I have had the same thing happen to me, although when I do my rituals I have no problem manifesting them. If you can think about it, when you say something like that, you could qualify it with saying "in a loving way" or "for the highest good of the whole" or something similar. That will give you greater control over events in your life. I do think that whatever emotion or feeling you are having about something has a lot to do with the outcome of events. You may want to discover what your judgements are as well as what angers you and work through them. Hope that has made sense.
Oh, and when you are performing your rituals, try dancing to see if that will help you while casting.
Love & Blessings

[Rick]

Originally posted by Joy
<BIG SNIP>Oh, and when you are performing your rituals, try dancing to see if that will help you while casting.
Love & Blessings
HEHEHE... I can't chew gum & walk at the same time... just imagine how dangerous I'd be trying to do magic & dance at the same time... there'd be magic flyin' around in all directions... 8O