adifferentopera
January 31st, 2006, 09:17 AM
Well, I was meditating last night, just seeing where the wind would take me. I tend to think that the gods might exist, might be archetypes, might be prisms of whole, but what's important is that I find a spiritual system that gives me satisfaction. So lately I've been meditating to discover my personal (meaning, not historical) gods.
Which brings us back to last night. I had read tarot earlier, and this cave entrance in the ace of pentacles (Golden Tarot) really caught my eye, so I started the meditation with that. The tunnel became smaller and smaller, to the point that I was almost hyperventilating (I went spelunking once, and it was a terrifying experience), and then eventually it got large enough to be able to walk in. Then there were four chambers: first I took cool shower to clean myself off, then heat dried me, then I put on a robe that felt like it was spun out of clouds, then I ate a really hearty meal. In the last chamber was a red door-pretty small, wooden. It took me a little bit to work up the courage to go through.
I found myself in a meadow with horses grazing. One of the horses indicated I was to get on, so I rode bareback and he took off at a gallop that seemed to last forever. So far, nothing too unusual.
Well, then the horse stopped. I was in Egypt-standing next to a woman overlooking the Nile. I immediately knew this was Hathor. We proceeded to have a conversation wherein she kept trying to convince me that my spirituality lay in Egypt, and I kept resisting. I pointed out I'm not Egyptian, and she rolled her eyes. This whole time I'm panicing, because I keep thinking about my (personal) gods and how much I love them and don't want to lose them. So I tell her that I'm quite happy with my own myths, my own truths. She replied, "People don't get to choose their own truths. That's the way it works." This went on for awhile, until she got really frustrated with me and suddenly the whole scene dissolved and I was back in my room, very upset.
Soo...I guess my question would be, does this sound like Hathor, to those who know Her? It didn't feel like a normal meditation-I had no control over where it was going, wasn't able to lead anything, etc. The whole Egyptian thing also just came out of nowhere; I've always been interested in ancient Egypt, and when I visited I loved all of the old temples, but I wouldn't call myself particulary fascinated with it, or drawn to it, or anything. Also, I wasn't really looking for a pantheon, or a patron, etc. But she was just so insistent.
Opinions?
Which brings us back to last night. I had read tarot earlier, and this cave entrance in the ace of pentacles (Golden Tarot) really caught my eye, so I started the meditation with that. The tunnel became smaller and smaller, to the point that I was almost hyperventilating (I went spelunking once, and it was a terrifying experience), and then eventually it got large enough to be able to walk in. Then there were four chambers: first I took cool shower to clean myself off, then heat dried me, then I put on a robe that felt like it was spun out of clouds, then I ate a really hearty meal. In the last chamber was a red door-pretty small, wooden. It took me a little bit to work up the courage to go through.
I found myself in a meadow with horses grazing. One of the horses indicated I was to get on, so I rode bareback and he took off at a gallop that seemed to last forever. So far, nothing too unusual.
Well, then the horse stopped. I was in Egypt-standing next to a woman overlooking the Nile. I immediately knew this was Hathor. We proceeded to have a conversation wherein she kept trying to convince me that my spirituality lay in Egypt, and I kept resisting. I pointed out I'm not Egyptian, and she rolled her eyes. This whole time I'm panicing, because I keep thinking about my (personal) gods and how much I love them and don't want to lose them. So I tell her that I'm quite happy with my own myths, my own truths. She replied, "People don't get to choose their own truths. That's the way it works." This went on for awhile, until she got really frustrated with me and suddenly the whole scene dissolved and I was back in my room, very upset.
Soo...I guess my question would be, does this sound like Hathor, to those who know Her? It didn't feel like a normal meditation-I had no control over where it was going, wasn't able to lead anything, etc. The whole Egyptian thing also just came out of nowhere; I've always been interested in ancient Egypt, and when I visited I loved all of the old temples, but I wouldn't call myself particulary fascinated with it, or drawn to it, or anything. Also, I wasn't really looking for a pantheon, or a patron, etc. But she was just so insistent.
Opinions?