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View Full Version : yet another unappreciated mother



phoenixblayze
February 1st, 2006, 01:14 PM
hi all
forgive me, this is gonna be a rant :rant:

ok, as many of you know im the mother of a 10 month old. i also work full time during the day, and because my husband works third shift, i have no help during the nights with the baby....i try to keep the house as clean as i can, but as many of you know, working full time and chasing a baby that has just figured out how to walk around doesnt give you alot of free time. i mainly have to catch up on the housework on the weekends when my husband is home, and then i make him play with the baby while i clean the entire house.

last weekend i was able to do some heavy duty cleaning, im talking about vaccuming the furniture, rearranging bookshelves, scrubbing the bathroom floors, everything. my son was at my mothers for the afternoon and i took advanage of the time to get some things done. the whole time that im working on the house my hubby sits there at watches the football game.....nice. when im done he says that he is hungry, and i make dinner.....all while he is sitting on the couch watching the game.

well, since then i havent had the time to do the dishes again.....i get off work at 9:00 pm, and by the time i get the baby ready for bed, wayne is walking out the door, and im zonked, so i go to bed to. last night i came home, and the husband starts laying into me about how i dont need to let things go around here. i pointed out that i cleaned last weekend, and instead of thanking me, he pointed out things that i still didnt do..........wtf, talk about being unappreciated. he then proceeds to tell me that he doesnt ask me to do much, so i should try harder to clean up, and even throws things that he has had to do to save our relationship in my face, and trys to use that as reasoning why i should clean up more...as if i need to repay him for breaking off contact with an ex?

on that note he leaves for work, i get the baby taken care of....(he didnt get to sleep until 11:30) and after laying him down i stay up until 1 cleaning up the kitchen. then my son, who got a two hour head start on sleep woke up at three in the morning, and seven......so im running on no sleep again. the husband just doesnt get it......i suppose he expects me to stay up until all hours of the night to clean the house the way he thinks i should. all he has to do around here is the laundry and outside work because i have allergies, and hello....its fricking winter right now.

i dont know, i just feel like all the crap that i do, and all the sleep that i loose taking care of his son means nothing. i have thought about going to a friends house for the weekend and leaving him with the baby, just to see how he handles it. i can guarantee when i came home the house would be a disaster area.....

*sigh* im sorry this is so long, im just tired.....

Astara Seague
February 1st, 2006, 01:24 PM
Oh poor Pheonix!
I have been there, I had three kids in the span of 4 years! and worked full time, I did take off and leave him with the kids once and it only made matters worse for us! but it was sure nice to get away for a day or so
as time has gone on I have always worked, it is so you cant not work anymore, but two divorces under my belt and alot of broken relationships have taught me alot about men in general, they just dont have a clue unless they have actually tried to take care of a house kids and wife, yes one guy even told me he had broken up with girls before because they couldnt keep house, now how shallow is that?? :rant:

CoolJ
February 1st, 2006, 01:27 PM
sweetheart *huggggs*

I'm sorry that you're so unappreciated, having seen and have been raised by a mom that does all the work, I know that you deserve a lot more..

I'm sorry, some people are just immature children, maybe you SHOULD leave him alone with the house for a while for him to see exactly how much he needs you around... you need to discipline that puppy!

BlackMagicalCat
February 1st, 2006, 01:30 PM
You are carring a heavy load precious one,I will pray for your load to be lightened.

WitchJezebel
February 1st, 2006, 01:35 PM
That sucks phoenix, it really does. I don't have any children so I can't really give you any sound advice, but I know how you feel - my best friend had this problem with her first husband. He'd be watching football all day on the weekends and SHE was doing home repairs. She'd call me and I'd come over to help while he sat on his duff in his underwear. Maybe leaving him alone with the baby for the weekend isn't so bad an idea; it'll give you a chance to get some rest, clear your head and decide how best to resolve it. The only problem is that your house will most likely be a disaster when you get back.

:hugz: to you dear, I know this must be exhausting for you.

Karissma
February 1st, 2006, 03:09 PM
Im so sorry hun. This is quite crappy for you. And totally unfair. Sometimes husbands just dont get it. :( Being a mom, caregiver,maid,cook,etcetc isnt as easy as we try and make it look. *hugs ya tightly*

Akhkharu Asgard
February 1st, 2006, 03:16 PM
What an idiot! I'm sorry that you have to put up with that. You should be appreciated! All of this stuff you do on your own while he sits there watching football. And he has the gall to complain?? GRRR! Do this: :fpcsucks to the television.

phoenixblayze
February 1st, 2006, 03:26 PM
What an idiot! I'm sorry that you have to put up with that. You should be appreciated! All of this stuff you do on your own while he sits there watching football. And he has the gall to complain?? GRRR! Do this: :fpcsucks to the television.

:lol: trust me, i have thought of it.....im seriously thinking about staying at a friends house for the weekend, and leaving him at home with the baby....of course i will have to let my mom and mother-in-law know whats going on, so they dont take the baby when he tries to pawn him off on one of them

storm_child
February 1st, 2006, 04:57 PM
HUGE HUGS FOR YOU

hang in there, i know its tough(not from personal experiance but my mum always talks to me about being unappreciated so i kinda get it, that and when i lived at home i was the slave horse).
I really hope things start getting better for you, and your husband smartens up. I seriously want to phone your house rihgt now and give that man of yours the bigest bitch out of his life. You dont need that type of stress, although i have a suggestion... next time he is on his ass watching tv and says im hungrey say "oh, ok what are you going to make your self?" hell prolly be shocked or get mad.. you then say "Well iv just done _____ while youve been watching t.v, im going to have alittle down time. then go about what ever oyu want to do. or if your busy being the maid/mother at the moment continue what you were doing. And my slighlty cattier side wants you to say "oh, ok well you a big boy im sure you can handle a kitchen" but that might not go so well... i dont know your husbands temperment.
ANYWAYS best of luck and the brightest blessings i can scrounge up
~~storm child