Can't stop getting upset with my SO :(

[mystic_peacock]

Hi.
I am in a sad predicament. I am stressed and tired from school and everything else. My boyfriend and I have very little time to spend together because he is in a theatre show right now (rehearsals every Saturday since January!) and I have school. But every time we get moments together I end up getting upset over stupid things and ruining the precious hours we have!
I think I get upset because I don't want to leave + am tired/stressed, and when I get upset he won't let me go home until we resolved the argument.

But I don't want this to keep happening. I don't want to keep getting upset over things that aren't his fault. I end up taking things out on him and I don't know why, I don't know what to do. I don't want to make him "put up with" me---I don't want to be that kind of girlfriend :(
What should I do? How do I calm down and learn to separate stupid things from real issues that need to be discussed?

I am so sad today over this. It happened again last night, and I woke up so upset about it. I already emailed him (I can't call him at the moment) and will be talking to him about it tonight. My concern is that I just don't want it to keep happening and any advice anyone has to stop this cycle will be very much appreciated.

Thank you so much. Love to everyone.
--Serra

[SilverClaw]

Well for the stress can you say what is exactly stressing you out ? With school what things may be causing the most stress is their anyway you can change it?

Also on a personal level have you tried grounding yourself? I do it everytime I start to get upset sometimes I calm down right away other times it is a real struggle. There is also Colour Therapy and mediation to that could help.

Those are some of the suggestions that came to mind right away, I wish you the best in talking to him tonight and hope things work out for you.

[mystic_peacock]

Hymnia--
The things that are stressful are just the mass amounts of things I have gotten assigned in the last week and a half of the semester. I got my take-home final for a class and it consists of 4 papers: one is 5-7 pages long, the other three are 2-3 pages each :(
Plus this just hasn't been a good semester---I am hatin' school very much and I think it just makes things worse.

About grounding> That was the first thing that came to my mind. Is there a couple's grounding sort of thing that would calm me down and get me in tune with my SO?

Thanks for your reply, I appreciate it.
--Serra

[MysticWitch]

Well communication is important. Maybe talking about issues before they build up inside of you?

Life gets busy sometimes. No matter who you are with. If these issues are affecting your currently relationship, they might affect any relationship you will be in until they are out of the way.

If you think school is too much stress, maybe being single until schools done can help?

Maybe date this person but casually, that way there are no expectations and that you both can see each other when you have the time..

Its either that or you both have to MAKE the time.
A relationship is effort on BOTH sides.
Good luck hun.

[SilverClaw]

Ah yes the joys of homework I know it well :D

I am hatin' school very much and I think it just makes things worse. Yes that certainly does not help, and in my opinion most grounding exercises can be used as a couple.. Basically you do it at the same time, you can hold hands while doing it...

If you can there are grounding exercises in some of the forums here and there is also one I do which I will type out for you later today. But right now I have to get back to doing dishes so talk to you soon.

[Brenda]

:hugz: :hugz:
Stress can have strange effects on people honey.
There's not much you can do about it.
Except positive thoughts.
When you're feeling positive, then your actions will be positive too.
But of course, I know it isn't easy to be positive.
Try to talk to your bf, and tell him how you feel.
Then he'll know what he can except from you and then you won't have to feel so guilty.