Serious Health Issues

[Bluewillow]

I've mentioned a few times since joining MW that I've got what doctors believe to be severe osteoarthritis in both knees, and to a lesser degree in every other joint in my body. I've been unable to walk since last September due to it.

When I moved to England last October, I registered with my local gp, and he referred me to a rheumatologist, who referred me to an orthopedic surgeon.
I had already had two arthroscopies (one on each knee) since I was about 18 years of age, and the problems have just progressed. After the last operation at 21, the surgeon back in America said in no uncertain terms that a knee replacement would be the next step, and that he had never seen anything like what I have in anyone near my age. I'm now 23.

Anyway, after seeing some MRI's and x-rays I'd had sent from America and doing some x-rays of his own, the orthopedic surgeon here gave me some grim news (which I posted right around the time I joined MW). I was basically told that if I have the knees of an 80 year old or worse, horrifically arthritic, and that if I have a knee replacement now, I run the risk of having it wear out very quickly (due to the severity of the osteoarthritis and my age), like within about 15 years or less.

By the time that happens, I will need another one, but there won't be as much bone to work with by the time that rolls around, and if I cannot have a second replacement I will either be wheelchair bound, or I have two even worse options: I could have the knee joint completely removed and have the upper leg bone fused to the lower leg bone, OR, (in the absolute worst case scenario) if the joint becomes badly infected because of the absence of a joint, the leg would amputated from above the knee. So, yes, grim news. Of course I am taking into account the fact that in 15 years from now, medical science will have improved and they will figure out a way to help me if any of that occurs, and they could also have much better replacements than they do now.

Anyway, the surgeon sent me for another MRI on my right knee, the one they are focusing on at present. Now I have an appointment for Thursday to go in and discuss the results of the MRI and what step I want to take next.

I am afraid that he's going to want to put off the knee replacement because of my age. I want it done now. I know it could be done now, younger people have had it done. I've already been told that it should be done. There is no other option. It's either I sit and wait while my knees waste away further and my life continues to pass me by, or I get this done and see what happens in the long run. My entire life is on hold because of my damn knees. I can't walk, I can't find a job (seriously, not even office work because I don't have the proper qualifications and I don't have transportation with my hubby working full time), I can't go anywhere by myself, I don't have a social life, and all because of what is happening to my knees.

I have to file for indefinite leave to remain (residency) in one year from now. When I do, I have to be able to prove that my husband and I are building a life together. We are, but if I cannot even work because of this, how can I prove that I am doing my part???

So I guess I just need any energy and prayers that you all would be willing to give, so that this doctor will be entirely honest with me and not put the surgery off simply because of my age. I need this surgery done NOW. I need him to just buckle down and say okay, fine, we'll do it. There is no other option. I can't stand living like this anymore, not being able to be the independent person I am inside.

Any energy/prayers would be GREATLY appreciated.

[moonbride]

Will definitely be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you can get yourself fixed up and feel better soon. :hugz:

[LostSheep]

all the sheepy hugs you can get ....

:hugz:

:hugz: :hugz:

:hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

oh all right then,

:hugz: :hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you Moonbride, and thank you Sheep for the Sheepy hugs. :D :hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[debnmike]

K, you know I wish only the best for you. I'm sending you all I've got (want some wine to go with it?).

I'm thinking of you!

Love ya!
Deb

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Deb. Sure, I'd love some wine! Want to share a bottle? :D

Lots of love to you too. :hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Sage Rainsong]

Hope you feel better soon! Energy and prayers to you.

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Sage Rainsong!! :hugz:

[Brightshores]

:hugz: and best wishes...

Sending you all the helpful and healing energy I can muster up. :hahugh:

By the way - I had some experience dealing with the Home Office when I was over there - in general, they're a fairly reasonable bunch. They can tell who's in an honest marriage and who's doing it for the little piece of paper. Don't worry too much about your knees affecting your immigration process. Everything will be OK.

:hugz:

[Sage Rainsong]

Thank you so much, Sage Rainsong!! :hugz:

No problem! Do I get any of that wine now?

[Brenda]

:hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

No problem! Do I get any of that wine now?


Absolutely. *pours you a glass* There ya go! :D

[Bluewillow]

Thank you very much, Brightshores!! :hugz: I worry about the ILR process so much. I hear the Home Office is pretty reasonable, I just worry that we won't have all the documentation they want because A: We're living with my brother in law for the time being, and so are missing certain documents we'll need and B: We need 10 documents for each year to show that we're living together, working on building a life, e.t.c......and so far most of what I have is merely NHS letters and letters from home. Argh!! lol

I'm sure somehow it will work out, it just worries me in the meanwhile. :awilly:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you for the hugs, Brenda! I could always do with some of those.:hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Brightshores]

Glad I can help. :hugz:

If you ever need to chat about the Home Office process, just send me a PM - my husband and I spent a lot of time researching that sort of thing. In the end, we came back to the US before we applied for ILR, but we know exactly what you're going through. :hahugh:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you very much! It's just kind of nervewracking. I've been researching it for some time, and though I am not much of a worrier about most things, this has me worried. lol :awilly:

Anyway, I'd really appreciate hearing about your experience! Thank you! :)

[Brightshores]

Well.. our situation was a bit different because I am a dual US/EU citizen, so I was entering the country under the EEC treaty rules, and my husband was coming in as an EEC spouse. Other than that, though, we went through the NI card interview process, and the proving-we're-functioning-members-of-society-and-not-destitute process in just the same way.

I assume you're married to a British citizen? I have a good friend from the US who married a guy from Northampton, and I think she just got her IRL in the last few months. (It's funny how I moved to Britain and ended up becoming friends with a bunch of expats from various countries. :hahugh: ) If you like, I'll mention your situation to my husband, who did most of our research and see what helpful hints he may have.

Everything will work out fine! You'll see. :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Well.. our situation was a bit different because I am a dual US/EU citizen, so I was entering the country under the EEC treaty rules, and my husband was coming in as an EEC spouse. Other than that, though, we went through the NI card interview process, and the proving-we're-functioning-members-of-society-and-not-destitute process in just the same way.

I assume you're married to a British citizen? I have a good friend from the US who married a guy from Northampton, and I think she just got her IRL in the last few months. (It's funny how I moved to Britain and ended up becoming friends with a bunch of expats from various countries. :hahugh: ) If you like, I'll mention your situation to my husband, who did most of our research and see what helpful hints he may have.

Everything will work out fine! You'll see. :hugz:

Yep, I'm married to a native Yorkshireman. :D

I belong to a forum for American expats who've made the move to Britain, mostly who've made the move after marrying a Brit. So that's helpful in the sense that I have that source for info and advice, and it's really cool knowing of so many couples who've been through some of what we have.

I wouldn't mind at all if you mention my situation to your husband. I'd really appreciate it, as a matter of fact! :)

Thank you again! :hugz:

[Brightshores]

That forum sounds great! I'll talk to my husband and let you know what he has to say.

Hope you feel better soon. (To put the thread back on topic a bit. :hahugh: )

[RunningBear]

Extra specical hugs and lots of energy for you :hugz: :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you very much, Running Bear! :hugz::hugz::hugz:

[Wisowl]

Positive Energy for the NHS doctors to get to the right decision ... and healing energies to your poor knees.

Love, Light and Healing

[Bluewillow]

Thank you very much, Wisowl!! :hugz:

[Philosophia]

Sending healing, positive, comforting and calming energy! :hugz:

[Sun Sprite]

I can relate to needing to feel like you are contributing to your marriage, and needing the doctors to listen. My problems are not the same as you, but I was house bound, and nearly wheelchair bound a few years ago.

Can you take any online college courses from home? Really, office work isn't too bad, and there may be some help available there that will help you learn some skills so you can do office work from home. Especially things like medical codeing and stuff. Seriously, some things you can learn and work from anywhere in the world. (I am trying myself)

Best wishes!

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Minerva Mind!! :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

I can relate to needing to feel like you are contributing to your marriage, and needing the doctors to listen. My problems are not the same as you, but I was house bound, and nearly wheelchair bound a few years ago.

Can you take any online college courses from home? Really, office work isn't too bad, and there may be some help available there that will help you learn some skills so you can do office work from home. Especially things like medical codeing and stuff. Seriously, some things you can learn and work from anywhere in the world. (I am trying myself)

Best wishes!

Thank you for your reply, Sun Sprite! :hugz:

I've considered taking online courses, but we just can't afford it right now. It's definately something I will be keeping in mind, though! :)

[LadyAutumnCat]

Sending you loving and healing energies. :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you very much, LadyAutumnCat!! :hugz:

[GalenaFaolan]

Sending you energies! :hugz: I know how it feels to be unable to do the things you want to and can't. Keep smiling though and something will happen for the good!

[LostSheep]

Is it today you're seeing someone about it? good luck :hugz:

_wedgie_ <-- that'll help as well

[Scarlettvixen]

sending healing to your knees hun

can you type accurately? do secretarial work? sometimes you can find work at home casual work for that sort of stuff
especially if there is a university in town.... uni student pay people to type their stuff up!

[Bluewillow]

Is it today you're seeing someone about it? good luck :hugz:

_wedgie_ <-- that'll help as well

Yep, I'm headed out to see the surgeon in about half an hour. Thank you, I need all the luck I can get! :hugz: _wedgie_ :D

[Bluewillow]

sending healing to your knees hun

can you type accurately? do secretarial work? sometimes you can find work at home casual work for that sort of stuff
especially if there is a university in town.... uni student pay people to type their stuff up!

I'm computer savvy, great with typing, e.t.c., but with the businesses around here, that doesn't seem to matter. lol They want folks with specific qualifications and experience. I've been looking for work at home stuff for a long while now, and all the companies I've seen advertising want specific experience. I have considered putting an ad in a paper offering to type up papers for students, however. lol

Anyway, thank you Scarlettvixen!!! :hugz:

[Brightshores]

Good luck! Hope he's got good news for you.

By the way - I spoke to my husband, and he says in a situation like yours, the Home Office will be far more interested to see if your hubby is working, since when a non-citizen marries a citizen, it's technically the citizen's responsibility to "support" the non-citizen financially. Obviously, if both are working, that's great, but they're looking for him to be doing most of the work at this point. So - no worries! :hahugh: (Or less of them, anyway. :lol: )

[Bluewillow]

Thank you, Brightshores!! Yep, my hubby's working full time as an assistant manager at a shop not far from here. So that at least covers that, I guess! :lol:
Thank you for talking to your husband about that for me! I really appreciate it. :)

[Brightshores]

Glad I can help. Hope you feel better soon and the surgeon has happy news for you. :hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Well, as it turns out, the receptionist in charge of appointments totally screwed up. My husband and I went all the way to the hospital for nothing, because the surgeon wasn't there and won't be until after next week. The receptionist was well aware of this, yet made my appointment for two weeks early. lol So now I've got an appointment for two weeks from today instead. Argh!!! lol

Ah well, two weeks isn't that bad, but I really the wish the receptionist had been paying enough attention to know when to make my appointment.

[Astara Seague]

two weeks go by fast..
best of luck and lots of healing energies for you

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Astara Seague. :hugz: :hugz:

[debnmike]

Well, as it turns out, the receptionist in charge of appointments totally screwed up. My husband and I went all the way to the hospital for nothing, because the surgeon wasn't there and won't be until after next week. The receptionist was well aware of this, yet made my appointment for two weeks early. lol So now I've got an appointment for two weeks from today instead. Argh!!! lol

Ah well, two weeks isn't that bad, but I really the wish the receptionist had been paying enough attention to know when to make my appointment.

Oh, K, that sucks! I was just about to PM you to see how it went.

Don't worry--we will be here to entertain ya...the next 2 weeks will fly by!

[Bluewillow]

Awwww, Deb, thank you. It just irritates the hell out of me that the receptionist wasn't paying attention to what she was doing. They even sent us to the wrong hospital!!! In any event, we've got the appointment and everything all worked out, I'll just have to remind myself to be patient in the meanwhile...lol. :hugz:

[debnmike]

Awwww, Deb, thank you. It just irritates the hell out of me that the receptionist wasn't paying attention to what she was doing. They even sent us to the wrong hospital!!! In any event, we've got the appointment and everything all worked out, I'll just have to remind myself to be patient in the meanwhile...lol. :hugz:

No doubt! Instead of hauling your cookies all the way down there, you could've been sittin' pretty and spending time with us! The nerve of her!:lol:

I'm glad they could get you in reasonably soon!

[Bluewillow]

I agree. I was worried that they would put the appointment off, but instead they got us one for pretty much right when the surgeon returns from vacation. My husband is still filing a complaint because he had to take time off from work to do this, I had to crutch in there for no reason, they sent us to the wrong hospital, and two weeks early.....so....:lol:

Let's hope this particular receptionist pays a little more attention to what she is doing in the future.

[Brightshores]

Awwww, Deb, thank you. It just irritates the hell out of me that the receptionist wasn't paying attention to what she was doing. They even sent us to the wrong hospital!!! In any event, we've got the appointment and everything all worked out, I'll just have to remind myself to be patient in the meanwhile...lol. :hugz:

Aww, that's got to be so frustrating. Someone should not let that woman near the appointments system.
:fpcsucks

:hugz:

[Bluewillow]

It is, and I totally agree!! :fpcsucks

[smckim]

Well, as it turns out, the receptionist in charge of appointments totally screwed up. My husband and I went all the way to the hospital for nothing, because the surgeon wasn't there and won't be until after next week. The receptionist was well aware of this, yet made my appointment for two weeks early. lol So now I've got an appointment for two weeks from today instead. Argh!!! lol

Ah well, two weeks isn't that bad, but I really the wish the receptionist had been paying enough attention to know when to make my appointment.
:hugz: :hugz: Sorry you had to go through all this! it sucks!
Lets push these two weeks by fast!
Sending calming energy and energy for a positive outcome with the surgery!

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, smckim!! :hugz: :hugz:

[Ancient Wisdom]

:hugz: :hugz: sending you energy hun!

[wolfjan1]

I will keep you in my prayers and meditations, and send you all the energy I can.
Bless you.

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Ancient Wisdom and Wolfjan1!! :hugz: :hugz:

[LostSheep]

Back in the old days people knew their jobs, see... now they just say "well, it's not on the computer.... :hrmm:". Don't let the incompetence of the receptionist put you off; the people doing the important jobs know what they're doing.

[Bluewillow]

You're absolutely correct there, Sheep. She might be completely incompetent, but at least I know that the surgeon knows what he's doing...:lol:

[Epona44]

for Bluewillow

be blessed, and be fortunate

:ringaroun

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Epona44!! :hugz: :hugz:

[MysticWitch]

Wow, Willow.. Do me a favor. I know that its not a cure but go out and buy the biggest bottle of VITAMIN B-100. they range from 13.00-25.00 a bottle but you will feel better in less than 3 months of taking them. I have the same problem as you but in my hands and arms and I went to a specialist and although nothing is a cure the specialist said she doesnt know why Vitamin B-100 helps.. but it does and there is fact to back it up... so ask your hubby for a bottle. What do you have to loose?

[Bluewillow]

That's awesome, Mystic Witch!! Thank you. I know there's no cure, but it's hell to live with and if that is something that helps, I'm all for giving it a try! He doesn't get paid for a couple of weeks yet, but when he does I will ask him to pop down to the pharmacy here and see if he can find a bottle. I am all for giving it a try if it will help me! In fact, my mother suffers from severe arthritis as well, so I'll pass the info on to her also. Thank you! :hugz:

[cloverleaf]

Done! I pray things are looking better already.

[Bluewillow]

Thank you, Clover Leaf! :)

Well, I go back to the surgeon tomorrow. As I said, two weeks ago I was sent to the wrong hospital two weeks early, and finally have the actual appointment to see my surgeon tomorrow in the afternoon. I don't want to ask again for energy because I really appreciate what was already given and the effort that went into it, and so if anyone reads this, would you please just keep me in your thoughts and prayers? I would really appreciate it so much, and I need all the luck and positive thoughts, e.t.c. that I can get. As I said before, I just need this surgeon to buckle down and do the surgery that is needed. Many thanks to everyone who sent energy and so on, and many thanks to whoever reads this. :hugz:

[Scarlettvixen]

:hugz:
good luck with the visit tomorrow hun

[Cassie]

My thoughts and prayers are with you. :hugz:
Good luck today!

[Bluewillow]

Well, I have just returned from my appointment with the surgeon. Here's the gist of what he told me: He's prepared to do a replacement, but has never seen a case like mine or done one on anyone so young (I am 23), so would like to get a second opinion, just to make sure that he has taken everything into consideration. There is something causing my knee joint to become deformed. There is a lot of deformed bone and abnormal cartilage, and there are huge spaces between the cartilage where there shouldn't be. The knee cap is far larger than it should be, and as I said in the original post, is set in a position far lower than what it should be. So basically he asked me, when I got there, whether I had given it much consideration, and I told him YES, I want the surgery done asap. He is worried nonetheless that I may end up having my leg amputated in 15 years roughly if I go ahead with it, and is worried that if he does the surgery on my knee in the bizarre state that it is in, it will not turn out well, which is why he is getting a second opinion from another surgeon who may have done the operation on someone closer to my age, and possibly has seen anything similar to what I have.

So now, as well as knowing I have osteoarthritis, I have something that is causing my joints to become deformed. Just looking at the MRI's there in his office made me want to bust out crying because I could see so plainly how horribly messed up my knee is. I nearly started crying right there because he said that it may take up to 2 months to get this second opinion (what with waiting lists on the NHS), and I thought to myself, who knows how long after that til surgery? I feel afraid and depressed. There's something ripping my joints apart and I cannot put a name to it. None of the surgeons I have seen have ever seen anything like it, and the latest has no idea what the hell it is. He's experienced. He's top in his department. I feel thankful that he is taking my case very seriously, but I also feel helpless, scared and depressed.

I am sorry for the ramble, I am just in shock and feeling very down about it, and my mind's going a mile a minute! lol

Anyway, thank you all for the energy you sent and the prayers you said. I appreciate it so much. :hugz:

[LadyAutumnCat]

:hugz: I'm so sorry.

[Brightshores]

:hugz:

Sorry the meeting didn't go as well as you may have planned. I hope this other surgeon can help you.... pain can be so hard to live with.

Best wishes...

[Bluewillow]

Thank you. I guess all I can do now is hold my head high and keep truckin', so to speak. I need to remind myself that I have a wonderfully supportive husband who has been and will be with me through all of this, and a loving family back home in Oregon cheering me on. I just feel so sad. I am so tired of not walking.

[LostSheep]

sheepy hugs. :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you, Sheep. :hugz:

[Cassie]

So sorry your appointment today didn't put your mind more at rest.
It does seem they are taking your condition seriously though and are trying to do the best for you. I know it is hard; but try to stay as positive as possible. I don't mean that as a cliche, I just think it will help.
Meanwhile I will send you as much healing energy as I can.
:hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you so much, Cassie. I absolutely agree that positivity is a must! There's a part of me that just feels scared and helpless, but I know that the only way I can truly keep going on with my head held high is to think positively and have courage. I am lucky to have a surgeon who cares enough to get a second opinion, keep me as informed as I can be about my condition, and get me the best help possible. :hugz:

[OrionNeb87]

:hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Bluewillow]

Thank you, OrionNeb! :hugz:

[Scarlettvixen]

:hugz: hun
sending the NHS hurry the @#$ up energies for your second opinion appointment!

[Bluewillow]

Thank you, Scarlettvixen!:hugz: