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Vincent Verthaine
September 25th, 2006, 05:11 PM
From the BOOK OF ERIS (http://www.verthaine.sphosting.com/gg.html)

If you've ever cast a sacred oblong, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever drank Irish whiskey and listened to The Doors as part of a religious experience, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever cast the Circle with a fishing rod, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked the quarters Washington, Bicentennial, Canadian and Silver, you might be a Discordian.
If your chalice is from McDonalds(tm), you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever set up 3 card monty on the side of your tarot booth, you might be a Discordian.
If your idea of a hex is screaming "Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble!", you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever done the "Great Left", you might be a Discordian.
If the majority of your Covens rituals usually ends up in drunken orgies, you might be a Discordian.
If you have at least 5 major deities or demons cellphone number on speed-dial,you might be a Discordian.
If your athame is a spork, you might be a Discordian.
If your coven sword is a light saber, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked a cartoon character, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever wiped your ass with "Principia Discordia", you might be a Discordian.
If you carry a Pope Card, but not an I.D., you might be a Discordian.
If your ritual feast consists of Jolt Cola and Spam, you might be a Discordian.
If halfway through the five-fold-kiss you stop to zerbert your HPS, you might be a Discordian.
If your BOS is written on toilet paper, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever begun a rite with "The Circle is open", you might be a Discordian.
If your coven holds a majority if it's rituals at the local goth/heavy metal or hippie jam band club, you might be a Discordian.
If you consider a moshpit to be a sacred dance circle, you might be a Discordian.
If your ritual cloak has "advertising space for rent", you might be a Discordian.
If you drive a F(N)ORD, you might be a Discordian.
If you have more than 1 can of spam in your cupboard, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked the Goddess with a wolf-whistle, you might be a Discordian.
If you're afraid that the paranoids are watching you, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.

Fiamma
September 25th, 2006, 05:19 PM
How about...if your grove is discussing the contept of "harvest" and what to do with it (what to eat, what to leave on the ground for fertilizer, what to feed to the animals etc) and you suddenly burst out singing the chorus to "The Gambler" because that's what comes to mind...you might be a Discordian

(Yes, this happened while trying to plan a ritual. I don't really consider myself to be a discordian, but I definitely have some tendencies.)

WiccanGoddess
September 25th, 2006, 05:27 PM
From the BOOK OF ERIS (http://www.verthaine.sphosting.com/gg.html)



If your chalice is from McDonalds(tm), you might be a Discordian.

Hey, just because I can't afford any other chalice! ;)



If your athame is a spork, you might be a Discordian.

*blushes* At one point, it was a spork...when I first started out in Paganism. ;)



If your coven sword is a light saber, you might be a Discordian.

Hy, I'm cheap! *sticks tongue out*




If you've ever begun a rite with "The Circle is open", you might be a Discordian.

My circle is always open, to whomever or whatever wishes to pass. The circle encloses my house, and ends at a point...but it's open.



If you have more than 1 can of spam in your cupboard, you might be a Discordian.

I'm a college student...spam is cheap.



If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.

I'll usually reply, "The Sky, dark and cloudy", or w/e the weather may be.

*laughs*

Amelserru_halqu
September 25th, 2006, 06:13 PM
How about

"If you've ever used a puppet of the killer bunny from Monty Python's Holy Grail to banish something, you might be a discordian."

Brightshores
September 25th, 2006, 06:23 PM
If your chalice is from McDonalds(tm), you might be a Discordian.
How about Taco Bell?


If your idea of a hex is screaming "Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble!", you might be a Discordian.

I think I might actually have done this at one point. I don't think it involved hexing, though, which IMO makes me even more disturbed...
:T

If you have at least 5 major deities or demons cellphone number on speed-dial,you might be a Discordian.
Does my family count?


If your athame is a spork, you might be a Discordian.

Spork!


If your ritual feast consists of Jolt Cola and Spam, you might be a Discordian.

How about Coke and mini-pretzels?

If you're afraid that the paranoids are watching you, you might be a Discordian.
What if you're sure about that one?

If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.
I'm with WG on this one... I've often answered it literally. 8O

(Absolutely brilliant post by the way... my half-joking aside, it's quite profound in a non-profound sort of way.)

SilverClaw
September 25th, 2006, 06:27 PM
:fpraise: Oh gosh there are some of those I am hmm guilty of :rollingla

Thanks for the post Vincent.

Vincent Verthaine
September 25th, 2006, 07:48 PM
You'd be suprised who may be discordians and either don't realize it,or won't admit it.

WiccanGoddess
September 25th, 2006, 08:03 PM
I don't believe things like that can make or break a Discordian. (Or any religion...the "You Might Be...If..." doesn't really strike me as truth breaking. More sarcastic than. Like the "You Might be a Redneck If...". This seems to be quite similar.)

eldora_avalon
September 25th, 2006, 08:47 PM
Yep.
Probably, especially if that counts as a religious experience.:heybaby:
Nope, I don't fish.
Not exactly,but I put them where I want them according to the geography of where I am ;)
I have a chalice I got on clearance after Halloween at Target. It is a skeleton hand going up.
Nope, that would be illegal and stuff ;)
Absoffragginlutely :hehehehe:
You weren't supposed to tell.
Well, never belonged to a coven, so I don't have to answer that one :P
I don't need no stinking cell phone to get in touch with, nevermind.
Nope, it is an actual knife, I am so ashamed :(
Yep
Are you threatening me? I AM CORNHOLIO!!!!! I need cappucino fo rmy <censored>
Nope, I couldn't find it the last time I ran out of TP, see answer above :hehehehe:
Not telling :P
No Spam, but probably PBJ's :hehehehe:
:hehehehe: :heybaby:
No, I put everything in my computer, I have a hard enough time writing on regular paper without writing on TP
Lots of times :P
No coven, I don't need no stinking coven ;)
Yeah, but I am getting kind of old for mosh pits :(
:hehehehe:
I'lll never teeeellllllll.....
NO SPAM!!!!!
No, but the goddess within has been :heybaby:
Oh, I know they are, but I am not afraid, bwahahahaha
With hilarious results, actually ;)

Twinkle
September 25th, 2006, 08:52 PM
You'd be suprised who may be discordians and either don't realize it,or won't admit it.


Not me. Nope.

Twinkle
September 25th, 2006, 08:54 PM
Seriously.

Fire's Shadow
September 25th, 2006, 08:59 PM
Not me. Nope.

I'm not either. :2G:

Srsly

Shatril
September 25th, 2006, 09:04 PM
I resemble some of those.

Kaylara
September 25th, 2006, 09:26 PM
I got a few of them, and quite a few that aren't on there.

Like casting a circle with a pink plastic lawn flamingo. (Still looking for that ritual Eldora)
Or Raising energy by chanting "Badger Badger Badger Badger, Mushroom Mushroom!"
Or my old shrine to random bits of junk that you find when walking. (you know, superhero legs, melted sporks, weird pieces of metal, plastic monkey heads, etc.)

Amelserru_halqu
September 25th, 2006, 09:34 PM
Oh! Oh! Oh! Have you ever tried destroying things with a wooden mallet while screaming GOOMBA SMASH! GOOMBA SMASH!!! It's absurd and involves destruction, what could possibly be better than that? GOOMBA SMASH!!!

Bethra
September 25th, 2006, 09:37 PM
If you've ever cast a sacred oblong, you might be a Discordian.
Umm nope
If you've ever drank Irish whiskey and listened to The Doors as part of a religious experience, you might be a Discordian.
Not whiskey but there was this time,,,,,
If you've ever cast the Circle with a fishing rod, you might be a Discordian.
Umm nope
If you've ever invoked the quarters Washington, Bicentennial, Canadian and Silver, you might be a Discordian.
Definatly not LOL
If your chalice is from McDonalds(tm), you might be a Discordian.
Chalice??? I have a nice pint pot does that count?
If you've ever set up 3 card monty on the side of your tarot booth, you might be a Discordian.
Na never had a booth.
If your idea of a hex is screaming "Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble!", you might be a Discordian.
The turkey is such an ugly bird.
If you've ever done the "Great Left", you might be a Discordian.
Naa not on purpose anyway
If the majority of your Covens rituals usually ends up in drunken orgies, you might be a Discordian.
Ah well umm on that one I plead guilty as charged
If you have at least 5 major deities or demons cellphone number on speed-dial,you might be a Discordian.
I don't have a cellphone too easy to track.
If your athame is a spork, you might be a Discordian.
I have this joke knife with a blade on a spring does that count?
If your coven sword is a light saber, you might be a Discordian.
na I just use the force.
If you've ever invoked a cartoon character, you might be a Discordian.
Don't mock the might power of Duckula
If you've ever wiped your ass with "Principia Discordia", you might be a Discordian.
Umm no just Margret Thatchers face on a newspaper.
If you carry a Pope Card, but not an I.D., you might be a Discordian.
I carry niether
If your ritual feast consists of Jolt Cola and Spam, you might be a Discordian.
*burp gurgle spam*
If halfway through the five-fold-kiss you stop to zerbert your HPS, you might be a Discordian.
Only if they are very nice to me :D
If your BOS is written on toilet paper, you might be a Discordian.
Na its just bits of scrap paer thrown together in a binder.
If you've ever begun a rite with "The Circle is open", you might be a Discordian.
*chuckles*
If your coven holds a majority if it's rituals at the local goth/heavy metal or hippie jam band club, you might be a Discordian.
*bounces about to Rob Zombie*
If you consider a moshpit to be a sacred dance circle, you might be a Discordian.
*throws self into center arms and legs flailing madly
If your ritual cloak has "advertising space for rent", you might be a Discordian.
Nope mines too cool for labels.
If you drive a F(N)ORD, you might be a Discordian.
I think I've owned more of these than all the other cars I've had put together.
If you have more than 1 can of spam in your cupboard, you might be a Discordian.
Spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam spam wonderful spam.
If you've ever invoked the Goddess with a wolf-whistle, you might be a Discordian.
Nope but I dismissed an archeangle with "Cheers for the rain Garbiel and all that but you can bugger off now"
If you're afraid that the paranoids are watching you, you might be a Discordian.
*nods and looks around* Shhh don't draw attention to me
If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.

The sky, :D

Vincent Verthaine
September 25th, 2006, 09:40 PM
I don't believe things like that can make or break a Discordian. (Or any religion...the "You Might Be...If..." doesn't really strike me as truth breaking. More sarcastic than. Like the "You Might be a Redneck If...". This seems to be quite similar.)

Umm,yeah.

Jeff Foxworthy is an admitted redneck,and I am an admitted discordian.
I'm allowed by special dispensation by ERIS Herself to make fun of my own Path.Especially since the Church of Eris,The BOOK OF ERIS,and I have been very influential in the Discordian Community for 30 years.
So if I want to poke a little harmless fun at the people who I love dearly,people who I've gone to bat for for decades,my brothers and sisters in Eris,I'd think they would understand.

SilverClaw
September 25th, 2006, 10:46 PM
I have a chalice I got on clearance after Halloween at Target. It is a skeleton hand going up.hehe I got my chalice with spider webs and things that are suppose to look like red jewels on it and I got it from Value village :)



Have you ever tried destroying things with a wooden mallet while screaming GOOMBA SMASH! GOOMBA SMASH!!! It's absurd and involves destruction, what could possibly be better than that? GOOMBA SMASH!!! Why do I see the Mario when I read that ? :D

Brightshores
September 25th, 2006, 11:16 PM
You'd be suprised who may be discordians and either don't realize it,or won't admit it.

Is it possible to be half-Discordian, or sort-of-Discordian? (seriously)


(re. Goomba Smash!) Why do I see the Mario when I read that ? :D
Because everyone who was a kid in the late 80s thinks of Mario when we read things like that. I know I do.
:rollingla

Amelserru_halqu
September 25th, 2006, 11:26 PM
Is it possible to be half-Discordian, or sort-of-Discordian? (seriously)


Because everyone who was a kid in the late 80s thinks of Mario when we read things like that. I know I do.
:rollingla

Silly person, do you want to be a half-discordian? Well, Pink Elephants and purple skys say that you are what you eat, so gobble up half a discordian and I'll count you as half a discordian.

Brightshores
September 25th, 2006, 11:29 PM
Silly person, do you want to be a half-discordian? Well, Pink Elephants and purple skys say that you are what you eat, so gobble up half a discordian and I'll count you as half a discordian.
Do they taste better with salt or with maple syrup? :T

eldora_avalon
September 25th, 2006, 11:44 PM
Do they taste better with salt or with maple syrup? :T

I can't find a way to answer that that will not get me into trouble _inabox_

SparkleWytch
September 26th, 2006, 12:28 AM
Yep that's me...or maybe not...maybe these are all signs you're a Rayne.
Hmmm
thoughts

Amelserru_halqu
September 27th, 2006, 01:40 PM
Do they taste better with salt or with maple syrup? :T

You use lemon with a parsly garnish of course.

SilverClaw
September 28th, 2006, 01:42 AM
Because everyone who was a kid in the late 80s thinks of Mario when we read things like that. I know I do.
:rollingla :santasmil glad to know I am not alone then :D :hahugh: :boing:

SammieAnn
October 4th, 2006, 09:38 AM
I am quilty on about 2/3 of those.

SilverClaw
October 10th, 2006, 05:41 PM
I am quilty on about 2/3 of those. :hahugh::cheers:

coaxialkettle
October 11th, 2006, 01:00 PM
Sink Inn Pyrate Shoppe&Wylde&WywernChocolate Box:
http://www.buildfreedom.com/stupidity/abolish_stupidity.html
get it while it lasts!
Cpt Hagbard Celine,Esq.
["CEO Gold&AppelTransfers Int'l"]

BlueEyedWolf
October 11th, 2006, 03:01 PM
lol....I'm just me.....

Malcolm
October 11th, 2006, 03:52 PM
Actually, I can answer no to all those questions. :cheers:

Besides everyone knows Irish whiskey is to good to waste on something like a spiritual experience...

ETA: well except the whats up thing but that wasn't a gut reaction, just me being a dick...

moon81goddess
October 11th, 2006, 04:11 PM
Are you threatening me? I AM CORNHOLIO!!!!! I need cappucino fo rmy <censored>

ROFLMAO

I am SO glad I wasn't the only one to have that quote pop into my head!! (Except, of course, not with the cappucino... *whistle*) :hahugh:

zionwood
October 22nd, 2006, 07:16 PM
"If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian."

i did that in sixth grade...and recently too...

Faust
October 22nd, 2006, 07:21 PM
discordians are time wasters

coaxialkettle
October 22nd, 2006, 08:58 PM
time is a stripper
doin it just for you

Twinkle
October 22nd, 2006, 09:17 PM
time is a stripper
doin it just for you


Ummm.....Could I get a lap dance?

Baron von Hoopla
October 23rd, 2006, 09:15 AM
discordians are time wasters

Please, someone move all those damn trees, I can't see the FOREST!

coaxialkettle
October 23rd, 2006, 09:20 AM
strong! Medicine

Faust
October 23rd, 2006, 10:40 AM
Please, someone move all those damn trees, I can't see the FOREST!

lol

gurlygurl2004
January 29th, 2007, 01:22 AM
From the BOOK OF ERIS (http://www.verthaine.sphosting.com/gg.html)

If you've ever cast a sacred oblong, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever drank Irish whiskey and listened to The Doors as part of a religious experience, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever cast the Circle with a fishing rod, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked the quarters Washington, Bicentennial, Canadian and Silver, you might be a Discordian.
If your chalice is from McDonalds(tm), you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever set up 3 card monty on the side of your tarot booth, you might be a Discordian.
If your idea of a hex is screaming "Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble!", you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever done the "Great Left", you might be a Discordian.
If the majority of your Covens rituals usually ends up in drunken orgies, you might be a Discordian.
If you have at least 5 major deities or demons cellphone number on speed-dial,you might be a Discordian.
If your athame is a spork, you might be a Discordian.
If your coven sword is a light saber, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked a cartoon character, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever wiped your ass with "Principia Discordia", you might be a Discordian.
If you carry a Pope Card, but not an I.D., you might be a Discordian.
If your ritual feast consists of Jolt Cola and Spam, you might be a Discordian.
If halfway through the five-fold-kiss you stop to zerbert your HPS, you might be a Discordian.
If your BOS is written on toilet paper, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever begun a rite with "The Circle is open", you might be a Discordian.
If your coven holds a majority if it's rituals at the local goth/heavy metal or hippie jam band club, you might be a Discordian.
If you consider a moshpit to be a sacred dance circle, you might be a Discordian.
If your ritual cloak has "advertising space for rent", you might be a Discordian.
If you drive a F(N)ORD, you might be a Discordian.
If you have more than 1 can of spam in your cupboard, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked the Goddess with a wolf-whistle, you might be a Discordian.
If you're afraid that the paranoids are watching you, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.

:yayah:

Idem
January 31st, 2007, 12:19 AM
Aw dammit.

eldora_avalon
January 31st, 2007, 06:54 AM
Aw dammit.

I know.

PeleRising
May 27th, 2007, 08:22 PM
From the BOOK OF ERIS (http://www.verthaine.sphosting.com/gg.html)

If you've ever cast a sacred oblong, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever drank Irish whiskey and listened to The Doors as part of a religious experience, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever cast the Circle with a fishing rod, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked the quarters Washington, Bicentennial, Canadian and Silver, you might be a Discordian.
If your chalice is from McDonalds(tm), you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever set up 3 card monty on the side of your tarot booth, you might be a Discordian.
If your idea of a hex is screaming "Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble! Gobble!", you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever done the "Great Left", you might be a Discordian.
If the majority of your Covens rituals usually ends up in drunken orgies, you might be a Discordian.
If you have at least 5 major deities or demons cellphone number on speed-dial,you might be a Discordian.
If your athame is a spork, you might be a Discordian.
If your coven sword is a light saber, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked a cartoon character, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever wiped your ass with "Principia Discordia", you might be a Discordian.
If you carry a Pope Card, but not an I.D., you might be a Discordian.
If your ritual feast consists of Jolt Cola and Spam, you might be a Discordian.
If halfway through the five-fold-kiss you stop to zerbert your HPS, you might be a Discordian.
If your BOS is written on toilet paper, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever begun a rite with "The Circle is open", you might be a Discordian.
If your coven holds a majority if it's rituals at the local goth/heavy metal or hippie jam band club, you might be a Discordian.
If you consider a moshpit to be a sacred dance circle, you might be a Discordian.
If your ritual cloak has "advertising space for rent", you might be a Discordian.
If you drive a F(N)ORD, you might be a Discordian.
If you have more than 1 can of spam in your cupboard, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever invoked the Goddess with a wolf-whistle, you might be a Discordian.
If you're afraid that the paranoids are watching you, you might be a Discordian.
If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.

Im guilty of 3-4 of these _inabox_ ... Not telling which ones though :nyah:

Sitalique
June 16th, 2007, 04:32 PM
A few of these I'm guilty of as well :)
Believe I'm in good company.

IasonOuabache
June 30th, 2010, 04:44 AM
:hyper:

jadborn
July 12th, 2010, 08:24 AM
Mmm, oh yeah, the Turkey Curse, how lovely!

Just
July 26th, 2010, 07:20 AM
Chaos I embrace, but being a Discordian I don't think I ever considered. However, some of these questions are food for thought.....

If you've ever cast a sacred oblong, you might be a Discordian.
lol -how about a sacred squiggle?

If you've ever drank Irish whiskey and listened to The Doors as part of a religious experience, you might be a Discordian.
does it have to be whiskey??? :P

If you've ever invoked a cartoon character, you might be a Discordian.
.... do general unnamed warrior archetypes count?

If you've ever begun a rite with "The Circle is open", you might be a Discordian.
LOL... nuff said. xD

If you're afraid that the paranoids are watching you, you might be a Discordian.
shh, they might here you thinking about them, tinfoil hats ppl.

If you've ever taken the question "What's up?" literally, you might be a Discordian.
What is up?

-Just

Corvis Canis Latrans
July 26th, 2010, 12:00 PM
If you carry a Pope Card, but not an I.D., you might be a Discordian.Hm. Maybe I should change my title here to "Pope" as opposed to "Papess"