i wish there is only one way to explain ... which u realy cant unless they were there

[lady draco]

i really need help on this one cause i cant get him out of my head or my dreams... i wish it never had happened but it did. His name i dont speak of but its Adrian Harper. i can honestly say :uzi: I HATE HIM..... but the reason being is that i was raped and molested by him for about 2 years. He used my ex-girlfriend against me and my mom. (Now i know that this wasnt supposed to happen but it did) my ex-girl friend was older at the time and he used to use it against me to put her away..now i didnt want that to happen. But if i told my mom she would have killed her (at the time remember this). so i did what he told me to do ...somethings i will never speak of again. he used my religion to do most of those things.he told me that it was part of a ritual...ast the time i didnt now that it wasnt part of religion. Its been a year and a half later and he has been in my dreams more than he used to. Im haveing more memorise of what happened...and i cant get rid of them.

i honastlyhave no idia on how to help mend them...please i need positive energy... icant take it no more ... i cant slep because the person i love brings bad memorise of things that happened... how can i mend this pain???

[Cat]

Did you ever tell anyone what happened? You need some help sorting it all out. Go talk to a counselor at school, or some other person you trust. Some burdens are too great to bear alone.

[BlueEyedWolf]

:hugz:

[lady draco]

yes actually this has been going on for a year but i forgot to include that they had a judge hearing or a jury hearing ... all i want is for it to be over so i can rest peacefully without thinking that what if he gets out of jail and dicide to hurt my family?? thats what really scarys me

[lady draco]

thanks mom:hugz: :hugz: :smoochypo _pounce_ _pounce_

[BlueEyedWolf]

:hugz: Always Baby! I love you!:smooch:

[cloudspanther]

hun,

Every single molester tells the victum that they will hurt this person or that person if you tell on them. Very rarely do they actually carry threw on that threat. See this people are bullies, and they are control freaks, but trust your parents to make sure that you and them are safe. He will always use that threat cause than he feels he has power over you. Toss it away, tell the truth and get angry. He had NO right to do what he did, he is an adult and you are still a child. He knows he is wrong, no matter what reason he gave for what he did. HE IS WRONG.
Take each day slowly, if something makes you remember what happened, write it down. Write down everything you remember each thing, than {unless needed for court} , have mom or another adult help you burn them. He has no power on you.

In healing from this nightmare you will find that you are stronger. Eventually you will find that you are so angry at what was done to you than you will pass the anger and fnd that you are even stronger. From one survivor to a future survivor , lady bless and strength.

lady bless,
clouds

[Lunacie]

Flashbacks (remembering what happened to you, what the person looked like, what he said) are very common for survivors of rape, and even incest. I learned that by attending a support group. Some people are more comfortable talking to a counselor or a therapist one-on-one, some people are more comfortable in a large group where they can do more listening and less talking. It helped me so much just to know that I wasn't the only person who been molested, and to know that other women had the same feelings about it that I did. If you haven't found a therapist or a support group yet, please-please-please give it a try.

Sending big hugs :hugz: and positive energies from one survivor to another.

[Bluewillow]

You've been given some wonderful advice here, so I just want to say that you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. I was molested by a neighbor at about 16 years of age, and I can sympathize with what you must be feeling. Just know that there are people out there who understand what you are going through. :hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[smckim]

:hugz: :hugz: I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, I am sending you energy for emotional healing, and healing of the memories. You are brave and strong! Blessed Be!

[BlueEyedWolf]

:hugz: Thank You, cloudspanther, Lunacie, Bluewillow, Smckim! For taking the time to offer my Lady Draco, Support and your thoughts to her! She needs to hear from others who have been there! Thank You all again!:hugz:

[Lunacie]

I'm just passing it on as a way of thanking all those women who were there with me, and for me, in the support group 20 years ago. We have to keep passing it on until we find a way to prevent this from happening anymore.

[Brightshores]

I don't have anything to add...the advice above pretty much sums it up - just wanted to send my support and positive wishes for healing and peace.

:hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[lady draco]

i thank all of u guys... this helps alot to now that i do have support. i wish i could have been there for every one else.. but i cant play god or godess. this means alot .

i actualy have tears in my eyes from all this.
thank u ,
lady draco :wah2:

[smckim]

i thank all of u guys... this helps alot to now that i do have support. i wish i could have been there for every one else.. but i cant play god or godess. this means alot .

i actualy have tears in my eyes from all this.
thank u ,
lady draco :wah2:
:hugz: :hugz:

[Lunacie]

Just pay it forward after you get back on your feet emotionally, 'k?

[cloudspanther]

No thanks needed you are now part of a sisterhood that has been formed from something that should never have ever happened, but it did and as a result you will find that you will be stronger. With this group you can not run away from it. You can not drink it away, any kind of strong drink is more likely to cause you to flash back. But you will find that you will notice the child that is being abused before others do, you will notice that friend that has changed and no one knows why? You will know.

One great thing about this sisterhood is that there is no "I owe yous" cause all any of us will say is, be there for another, be the hand to say, its ok, you did nothing wrong, you will survive this and that sob was sick. Guess we are a kind of twisted sisterhood. But we are the survivors.

lady bless and hold you,
clouds