Afterlife planning

[Jade Moon]

This is sort of a dark question to ask....but....
I recently had to help my mother write her will and the discussion came up about her wishes for burial and funeral arrangements. Well, this got me to wondering about what I want for myself when I die. And I honestly haven't a clue. What is the "pagan" thing to do? I've really only been exposed to the traditional Southern Baptist funeral and old fashioned cemetary burial. But I suppose there are many other possibilities like cremation.
So....I'm asking for ideas for my own funeral, lol! No, I don't need mental help! (Well, maybe a little!)

[Lyrien]

I wouldn't know if there is a pagan way to deal with death, sorry. However, something like that is so incredibly individual, that I'd imagine anything goes.

Personally, I'm not attached to my body. So everything that happens to it after death is strictly for those I leave behind. I'd prefer not being locked in a box, but if it makes those around me most happy; have at it. I honestly wouldn't care if everyone stood around and said 'have fun' right before they flushed me down the john. But like I said....it's all individual. :hahugh:

[Elderbush]

Truly an individual choice. I want to be cremated because it is a whole lot cheaper than casket burials and I object to the high costs, I have no desire to be dug up in a 1,000 years for study and I would much rather return to nature that much faster. Dig a hole for a tree, pour my ashes in and plant a new tree, that's fine with me or anything else my family feels comfortable with.

[Darklord_Kodiak]

I want to be put in a tomb. Dont know if I might just need this body even after death.

[Windsmith]

I want natural burial. No embalming; no dressing me in my fancy clothes and piling me with stuff. Just wrap me in a shroud or drop me in a cardboard box and toss me in the ground. And no big granite headstone - plant a tree, maybe. Since caring for the environment is a big part of my spirituality in my life, I'd like to do as much as I can to do the same in my death.

Eventually, I will plan a funeral and write it out, but this is mainly so that if I predecease my parents, they honor my wishes for a Pagan funeral (it doesn't matter to me personally, since I'll be dead, but as a comfort to my wife, who is also a non-deistic Pagan like me and would probably be pretty distressed by a Christian or Jewish funeral). If other relatives want to hold memorial services for me in their own faith tradition, that's fine, but I want the first ceremony to be Pagan - and I want it to be more a celebration of my life than a mourning of my death.

mother_faery, like Belle says, there is no one "Pagan" thing to do after death; it varies widely from tradition to tradition. If you want some good ideas, though check out The Pagan Book of Living and Dying (http://www.reclaiming.org/resources/death/). It was written by members of my tradition (Reclaiming), so I can't vouch for how universal it will read, but it has a lot of suggestions for funerals and memorials, burial, practical concerns - really useful stuff. The Reclaiming site has several other good resouces on death and bereavement issues, as well.

[AmyDarling]

However, something like that is so incredibly individual, that I'd imagine anything goes.

Bingo. It doesn't matter if you wanna get yourself bronzed and displayed in your own home! Lol. It's your choice. The only limiting factor is money.

[Meadhbh]

I want to be buried, my body can stuck around for a while longer thank you. As far as the actual funeral goes I want to go out big. A lot of guests, food, drink, music ect.

[Sesen]

If any of you are familiar with the show Six Feet Under I loved the episode with the biker funeral. More of a celebration of life then a mourning of death. Good music, plenty of food, and enough alcohol to go around:) . I think I would prefer to be cremated and have my ashes scattered though. It's much cheaper and there is really no need to have a plot to visit, I won't be there anyway. Of course as most here have already said it's a personal decision, and it's really more for your friends and family then it is for you. Perhaps if it wouldnt be too upsetting a subject it would be best to ask them what they want.

[Jade Moon]

I want natural burial. No embalming; no dressing me in my fancy clothes and piling me with stuff. Just wrap me in a shroud or drop me in a cardboard box and toss me in the ground. And no big granite headstone - plant a tree, maybe. Since caring for the environment is a big part of my spirituality in my life, I'd like to do as much as I can to do the same in my death.


I really like this! But, aren't there laws about embalming? I always wished to just be thrown into the ocean, but I figured that wasn't allowed for sanitary reasons or something.

[Windsmith]

I really like this! But, aren't there laws about embalming? I always wished to just be thrown into the ocean, but I figured that wasn't allowed for sanitary reasons or something.Ah-hah! There is an embalming law, but that law is not, "Everyone must be embalmed! Always!" It varies from state to state, but in general, embalming is only required under one or more of the following conditions:
The body will be viewed in a public place. So if your viewing is at a funeral home or church, embalming is required. If it's at home, or you're not having one, it's not.
The body will be transported via public transportation or across state or national borders.
Burial will take place more than 72 hours after death.
The health department requires it for infectious disease reasons.
Like I said, it's different in every state, so check into the laws of the state where you live, but by and large, those are the only situations where embalming is required.

I don't think dumping your body in the ocean is allowed. Though that would be cool. If it's ocean burial you're wanting, it'll probably have to be by scattering your cremains.

[Kalika]

I don't know about the 'pagan' thing to do, but I want to be cremated. The whole idea of my body rotting in a box in the ground kinda grosses me out.

[omar]

Most states have embalming laws, caskat laws & valt laws. I think here in Ohio the Amish can now use wood caskets.

[Wolfpoet]

The Nordic tradition is a rather simple one.

The body is burned along with his/her most valubale posessions. The old ways called for a man's wife to be burned along with him, but that's custom best not revived.

After the burning everyone gets drunk and has a party, brawling is optional. The traditional Irish wake is a very good example of this kind of tradition.

To mourn a person is to do him/her an injustice, celebrate who they where, how they lived their life and get so drunk you don't have time to cry.

[Cindlady2]

I want natural burial. No embalming; no dressing me in my fancy clothes and piling me with stuff. Just wrap me in a shroud or drop me in a cardboard box and toss me in the ground. And no big granite headstone - plant a tree, maybe. Since caring for the environment is a big part of my spirituality in my life, I'd like to do as much as I can to do the same in my death.



Yep! That's for me! I want to be fertilizer! LOL Let me rot and the worms eat my face.... just like Nature intended!:)

2nd choice is cremation... but I prefer to rot... I would like a hickory tree though. :)

I think you would have to check your state for laws but many states have "Green burial" areas now. Maybe check online for that too.

[danuwest]

After that there are several choices.

There is a company, I believe in Chicago, that will transform your loved one's ashes into a diamond. Someone can admire your diamond ring and you can say, "thanks, it's Grandma!"

Or you can have your ashes mixed into concrete and used as part of an artificial reef. One issue I have is that the area must be properly marked. It's unfortunate, but the reef aquarium hobbyists mainly get their coral chiseled right out of the reef. (There are new businesses starting that are trying to stop this destructive practice) I wouldn't want a loved one who wanted to be a place for corals to thrive to be ripped off the reef and placed in someone's tank in their living room.

Of course, there's just simple scattering too.

[Greybird]

Give this (http://community.gaiam.com/gaiam/p/HowtoBeGreenintheAfterlife.html) a good read.

[Windsmith]

Most states have embalming laws, caskat laws & valt laws. I think here in Ohio the Amish can now use wood caskets.That vault law's gonna get me in the end. If we can get me in the ground fast enough, no embalming, and I'm pretty sure I can be buried in one of the heavy cardboard caskets the funeral homes keep for transporting bodies...but that darned vault law. Minnesota needs to step on it to create a natural burial cemetary, otherwise there won't be a place that'll bury me without that stupid concrete grave liner.

I'm working on it, believe you me. If we can't figure it out, I'll be cremated, but that's far less "green," and I'd like to avoid it if possible.