Ideas for celebrating womanhood

[Jade Moon]

My oldest daughter just got her period. I explained all the birds and bees stuff to her long ago, but I would like to do something magickal for her. I have never really involved my children in my spiritual rituals, but I think this would be a great way to introduce her to the goddess. I'm thinking of buying her a necklace with a goddess and the moon, but what else can I do? Are there any specific rituals for this event? I don't want to embarrass her, but I want her to feel special.

[Ceres]

There are specific rituals, but how would she feel about that? If she doesnt already know about Wicca or Paganism as a fertility religion, it might not fly well to start introducing her to that aspect of it with something so intensely personal. I guess it all depends on her feelings in the matter.

My own daughter has pagan leanings, but isnt really that interested in committing herself to my spiritual path, so I offered a ritual, but respected her wishes when she declined.

Instead, to make the event special, I changed the way we do things to recognize her new status. I wanted her to look back and see it as a turning point in her life, when things changed. She was allowed more freedom in what she could wear, what movies she could watch, how she kept her room, etc. In many ways, I gave her rule over herself to show I respected she was now a woman. I also began to discuss more adult subjects with her such as abortion, domestic violence, or same sex marriage to help her form opinions on these things, encouraging her to think on subjects she hadnt thought of before.

I handle disagreements with her differently now too, listening to her arguments with more respect as an equal rather than adult to child. She isnt fully grown yet, but I am careful of her dignity and respectful of her wishes because this in between stage is as difficult a place to be for her as it is for me to see her in. We talk often about her plans for life.

I started a thread in books looking for recommendations to suggest to her for books that would be appropriate for this stage: http://www.mysticwicks.com/showthread.php?t=93365&highlight=daughter

[WitchOfEndor]

My 12 year old is getting close to having her monthly cycles & I've been looking for ways to make her feel special. She has MAJOR pagan leanings actually she's almost "militant" in her pagan leanings & has already started to debate people in religion LOL making sure all know that most xtian holidays have pagan roots. LOL I'm looking for a gold triple goddess charm to go on a necklace for her when the "big day" arrives. Other than that, I'm not sure how else to make the day special for her & how to avoid me blubbering that my baby is becoming a woman. ~sigh~

Blessings to all...

[Jade Moon]

I talked to a friend of mine last night. Her daughter just reached menarche last month and they are in the same classroom at school. We decided to hold a little ceremony/party for them next weekend. We will do a short ritual - make it real personal and meaningful - then we'll just have fun eating, drinking, dancing....whatever. I'm inviting a handful of women so that the girls will feel like they are entering "womanhood."

We are going to present them each with a moon goddess necklace with their birthstone on it. The girls are really excited!

[Lyrien]

I talked to a friend of mine last night. Her daughter just reached menarche last month and they are in the same classroom at school. We decided to hold a little ceremony/party for them next weekend. We will do a short ritual - make it real personal and meaningful - then we'll just have fun eating, drinking, dancing....whatever. I'm inviting a handful of women so that the girls will feel like they are entering "womanhood."

We are going to present them each with a moon goddess necklace with their birthstone on it. The girls are really excited!


I think this is really special and hope to do something equally as wonderful when my DD reaches this age.

I did not grow up in a pagan family, but we did have our own rituals for this situation. When my sister and I reached womanhood, mom took us out to buy an entire new 'grown up' outfit. Jewelry and shoes included. We got our hair cut in a way that we wanted, and spent the day interacting with our mother as an equal. Then that evening Dad took us on our first date. I saw Beverly Hills Cop and ate at a fancy restaurant...lol.

I was horribly embarrassed and scared when I first started even though I knew it was coming for a long time. Having our little rite of passage like we did, made me realize that it truly was a wonderful thing to be celebrated and not something to shy away from or be embarrassed by. I'm glad you are doing something wonderful for your daughter.

[Merrilyn]

I talked to a friend of mine last night. Her daughter just reached menarche last month and they are in the same classroom at school. We decided to hold a little ceremony/party for them next weekend. We will do a short ritual - make it real personal and meaningful - then we'll just have fun eating, drinking, dancing....whatever. I'm inviting a handful of women so that the girls will feel like they are entering "womanhood."

We are going to present them each with a moon goddess necklace with their birthstone on it. The girls are really excited!


What lovely ideas! Please let us know how it all turns out! :)

[Nitefalle]

I agree with everything that's been said here, and I also like the idea of the "date" with the Dad. If they don't want to do anything spiritual / religious, you could just take them out for a spa day and a fancy lunch, just have a girl's day out together, or have her pick one friend and send them together. I don't have any daughters, but this is something I've often thought about. Perhaps also ask if they have any questions about menstruation in general, or any other changes happening to their bodies / emotions at this point. A frank discussion without embarrasment might make them feel more in control of what's happening (if they aren't embarrassed to talk about it in the first place, that is).

[peggyelizabeth]

This: http://www.moltx.org/redparty.html is an interesting ritual that one mom created for her daughter. Depending on the young woman it could be way too much, but it's an interesting read none the less.

[Nitefalle]

Wow, I thought that was really beautiful!!!

[Jade Moon]

This: http://www.moltx.org/redparty.html is an interesting ritual that one mom created for her daughter. Depending on the young woman it could be way too much, but it's an interesting read none the less.

Great story! Thank you!!

[Mera_mera]

I got a special journal with a lock. I've thought about it sense, and I think it'd be good to give a journal with a calendar and encourage the girls to acknowledge and learn their patterns and what effects them, I know when I finally started doing this, I wished I'd been doing it from the start.

Another thing I've seen is giving girls a party in which someone comes to teach them bellydancing or something else womanly, and having spa treatment I think is also a great idea. I would make it very vaguely spiritual unless she is really interested/intrigued and wants to do a full-out ritual/ceremony. But I think having a day to do something womanly and getting a journal and a nice necklace as was stated would've been the ideal way to celebrate to me.

If you wanted to do something spiritual, I know that something that has become big for me during my time is to make a magickal meal, and special teas and do special exercises and meditations that make menstruation easier to handle. If you do anything like that, it could be cool to share that with her.

[LadyWillow]

I read somewhere that mothers took their daughter when menarche arrived and put aside a special day all for her. They buy her a new outfit and invite some of the mother's woman friends over from maidenhood up to crone hood. Then, the daughter spends some time talking to the women from all walks of life about everything and what it means to be a woman and a ritual follows this practice, or some other type of celebration.

I think it's wonderful you want to try something for your daughter considering mine was meant to be more of an embarssing ordeal than anything special!

[Tanya]

I have thought about this for my own daughter, and I think i will take her on a road trip. part of it camping and talking and getting close to nature, and part of it girl stuff with som hotels, and dinners out and a massage/spa...just starting a 'women's tradition' with her.

also, I have a ring my mother gave me, which now that I'm married i can't wear much , because it fits my 4th finger, and I have wedding/handfast rings on both, so I will give it to her as her 'woman ring' when it happens, its a butterfly made of pink opals.. she loves looking at it and knowing it will be hers 'when she's a woman'

[LadyCelt]

I think the book Circle Round may have somthing. I'm not sure.