Really rude people

[rantnraven]

Have you ever been entering a restaurant and there is somebody approaching behind you so you hold the door open? They don't say a word - not even a thank you and they get seated before you?

ARRRGGH!

That just ticks me off. As if they just expected it. I mean, a simple thank you and 'by the way, you go first" would be nice.

Any more, if I hold the door and get nothing in response, I will state, "You're welcome", in a very sarcastic manner. They usually turn and issue a thank you in a confused state that indicates they thought I was out of my mind.

I love the response.

RnR

[moonmagick4]

..or how about when you let a car out in front of you in traffic !!Or when you are at a 4-way intersection and you let a car go ahead of you!!!You are right!!Some people can be soooo rude!!!We just have to remember that we will NEVER be like that!!!Blessed Be Rant!!!!

[LaDaya]

Yeah!! There are some very rude people out there but the only thing we can do is just be polite ourselves and ignore their rudeness.

[Mariposa De La Luna]

It irritates me too! I always try to say thank you when someone holds open the door for me. I have to say that they never get ahead of us though because there are at least 2 of us who get in fist, unless it was an older couple. How about those parents who let their kids run around and speak loudly in restaurants, not fast food joints. Manners and common courtesy is something this country is loosing along with not minding your children. Some schools are starting to teach it because the parents don't! That is a shame! If my kids were so rude I would be ashamed and embarrassed!

[rantnraven]

Originally posted by SAHM
It irritates me too! I always try to say thank you when someone holds open the door for me. I have to say that they never get ahead of us though because there are at least 2 of us who get in fist, unless it was an older couple. How about those parents who let their kids run around and speak loudly in restaurants, not fast food joints. Manners and common courtesy is something this country is loosing along with not minding your children. Some schools are starting to teach it because the parents don't! That is a shame! If my kids were so rude I would be ashamed and embarrassed!


When I got out of hand at a restauran, my dad would take me into the mens room and promplty remedy the situation. Can't do that anymore.

[Mariposa De La Luna]

No, but they can be taken to the car while the other parent pays or the parent, if single, can hurry up and pay, take their food home. If they can't handle their children they shouldn't be in public spanking or not.

[Armitage]

I personally hate when peole bring cranky kids to restaurants after eleven pm. It's not that I don't like kids, but to see kids barely out of, or still in diapers at Denny's at 2am, being yelled at because they're crying, bugs the living hell out of me. They're crying cause they wanna sleep!

[Amora]

One of the most irritating and sad things I've ever seen was in a grocery store. A woman was checking out with her son who was around 8 or 9 years old. He was helping her to pack the groceries while she was throwing stuff at him. He accidentally put the bread in before something heavy. She ripped the bag out of his hand and screamed "you stupid get out of here!" I was dumb founded. That is her child that she embarassed, called stupid and probably ruined for life. By the look on the poor kids face it seemed to be somewhat of a common experience. I went home and cried.

I don't understand how rude people can be. It infuriates me.

[Mariposa De La Luna]

That is very sad. :( I think one of the wonderful things about a Pagan lifestyle is that most seriously consider whether they are ready to have children and when they do they respect them more than most people. Children are a very big responsibility. Its funny how the people who would make the best parents can't have children and some that can have children can't handle it without damaging them.

[rantnraven]

The parents that iritate me most are the ones who grab and yank their children around by one arm. I won't hesitate to say something to them, that just ticks me off to no end. :meanface:

[Lilu]

Originally posted by SAHM
How about those parents who let their kids run around and speak loudly in restaurants, not fast food joints. Manners and common courtesy is something this country is loosing along with not minding your children. Some schools are starting to teach it because the parents don't! That is a shame! If my kids were so rude I would be ashamed and embarrassed!


Oh sheesh! I hear you!!! I was SO EMBARRASSED a few weeks ago when we went out to lunch at a restaurant with my Mother-in-law, my sister-in-law and her son. In the MIDDLE of the restaurant he stands up on his chair and he starts singing "Who let the dogs out" at the top of his lungs. I was so embarrassed and felt really badly for the other people there. In fact *I* was the one who had to tell him to sit down and be quiet. It really was quite rude of my SIL to let him continue and even encourage him to sing. It might have been cute, but it was wholly inappropriate.

lilu

[Earth Walker]

I've held doors open for men, and gotten dirty or
hostile looks from them, or worse, been called bitch,
slut, and other names. Why be boys when they grow
up to be men? :confused:




Only my cat understands me. :D

[rantnraven]

I was using public transportaion some time back. The was mother with her little boy and the boy was being rather unruley. She would ask him to sit and, of course, he would not. She would ask him to please calm down and he would not. This went on for several minutes.

Finally a homeless man turned around, look the boy in the eye and barked "SIT!"

The little boy feel into his seat anddidn't make a sound for the rest of the ride.

[Amora]

Originally posted by SAHM
That is very sad. :( I think one of the wonderful things about a Pagan lifestyle is that most seriously consider whether they are ready to have children and when they do they respect them more than most people. Children are a very big responsibility. Its funny how the people who would make the best parents can't have children and some that can have children can't handle it without damaging them.

Truer words were never spoken. Children are a blessing and nothing less.

[Witchbourne]

Originally posted by rantnraven
Have you ever been entering a restaurant and there is somebody approaching behind you so you hold the door open? They don't say a word - not even a thank you and they get seated before you?

ARRRGGH!

That just ticks me off. As if they just expected it. I mean, a simple thank you and 'by the way, you go first" would be nice.

Any more, if I hold the door and get nothing in response, I will state, "You're welcome", in a very sarcastic manner. They usually turn and issue a thank you in a confused state that indicates they thought I was out of my mind.

I love the response.

RnR

I agree it really sucks when people cant even give a little
thank you when one do a thing like that or other nice
things....it's quite sad i think...

BB*

[gunner]

one of the early signs of the fall of a society is the loss of "good manners"

[sherry]

Gunner that is so true!
I was raised by strict but fair parents, if Dad said do you want to go to the car you knew you did not want to go there!! I could have seen the funniest thing of my life and not smiled at that point !!
and if you were told you'd be punished when you got home,( so it wouldn't upset the people you were visiting )it was as sure as christmas it was on its way!
I have to admit I caught on fast and can only remember 3 spankings in my life. Now I can see that I probably deserved more but they would take away something instead.

now i see my brothers children out of control and they don't hit them until they are ready to beat them and if they ground them they change their minds just to get them out of the house !!

I dont understand and when their children were small I would be in tears everytime I went home because I wanted children so bad ........now I go home and laugh !!
I really think if I had been a parent I would have been like my own Mom and Dad stop the bad happenings before they are habits

[Moonwillow]

Originally posted by rantnraven
The parents that iritate me most are the ones who grab and yank their children around by one arm. I won't hesitate to say something to them, that just ticks me off to no end. :meanface:


I stood beside a woman and her little girl in the nursery, and watched the child jump up and down and repeat wildly, "Mommy, Mommy, I really, really have to go!, for ten minutes. The mother continued to ignore her, the child continued. Mom turns around and yells " Stop it, I've been listening to this for over a half hour". My jaw hits the floor. I look at the little girl as the puddle starts to form on the floor. The mother frieks, shes all embarrassed, apologizing, yelling at the girl, yanking her by the arm to the bathroom (yes they had one there!).

I really shouldn't have said anything, but I felt so utterly horrible for that little girl, I just had to. Can you imagine making that poor child wait for that long??? Makes you wonder where people's heads are at?

[cydira]

I personally think things are not as bad as they could be for one simple reason, we're all here discussing it. Perhaps it's just me, but I think the more of us who point out that the decline in civlity is a problem, the sooner there will be a solution. But that is just my thoughts.

I know that when I have children, I'm going to raise them like my parents raised me. Essentially, placing a healthy respect for their parents in place before the idea of causing a public commotion. And if I ever catch a member of my family decideing to treat their children in a manner that is harmful to them or encourages the child to be a little monster, I'm going to probably berate them and do what I can to take care of the child. Of course, I'm rather lucky in the fact that the rest of my family will do the same. We're a little clannish. :)

[Tigerwallah]

Originally posted by gunner
one of the early signs of the fall of a society is the loss of "good manners"
Gunner, I've been thinking this for about 10 years now - maybe longer. I'm polite to a fault, but it is rarely ever reciprocated. My parents were the first of the television age parents. Whatever was on the tube was more important than my concerns. "Shhhhh. blank blank is on now." Was a very familiar sentence in my family. I actually turned out to be quite polite despite my parents. My sister went the other way. She causes scenes in restaurants, is rude to cashiers and other people in the service industry, and lets the door fall on whomever is behind her. I always chalked it up to my parents not paying any attention to her behavior. At 28, she should not be acting the way that she does.

When did it become so important to cut off the car infront of you to make it to the exit 3 seconds sooner? Why doesn't anyone take the door when you are holding it open? Does the person online behind you at the grocery store really think she'll check out quicker if she rams you in the butt with her carraige? Does the rude jerk telling you off at work really think that will motivate you to work harder? A lot of people just don't think beyond themselves. I always think that it is important to treat others as I would like to be treated. Is that a difficult concept?

[Lavender]

Some people are just too rude to be true. It makes you wonder how they were brought up.

What ticks me off are people who treat children with less respect than adults. Once, when my son was about 4 years old, we went to a resturant. I held the door open for him & as he was entering, a lady came out of the door & knocked him over. She kept right on going & didn't say anything or even acknowledge the fact I was holding the door. I yelled after her...Hey! You knocked my son over! She just gave me a look as if I was demented & kept right on going. If it wasn't for my hubby holding my arm, I would have hit her.

I notice things like that all the time...normally really nice & polite adults, pushing kids out of the way in line ups & such. Just because kids are smaller in size, doesn't mean they should be treated with less respect...

Ok, I'm getting off my soapbox now...

[Fawn]

A person is a person no matter how small--I love that and have said it to quite a few people and I hate those screaming name calling arm grabbing 'wanna-be' parents!! ARGH!!!
I'd dare one of them to grab my child's arm--he'd tell them to 'bugger off" yes softly too but with eyes of steel. (He has his mother's eyes) One look will fry ya!!
I also despise those 'gimme gimme can I have But Iiiiiiiiiii wannnnnnnntt iiiiiiiiiiiitttttttttt" Whiners!! ARGH We saw child do this in a store just today in fact and my son looked at me and said, "Dang if you was his Mom his butt would be sore after you told him once NO" (He's right I care not what the law says when he acts up and misbehaves I correct that misbehavior immediately not later right there on the spot always he's 13 years old now--and very mature and polite he opens the doors for the elderly and women and anyone with their arms full. He says, please and thank you and you are welcome he smiles. What is wrong with adults that they can't behave better than a 13 year old? Smiles are free give them away!!!

[Lilu]

Whenever we're in a restaurant lately, and we get a "younger" waitress/waitor and I say "thank-you" to them, they respond with "MmHm" instead of "You're welcome" or "My pleasure" or something like that. Since when do you respond to "thank you" with "Mmhm"???

I also had a pregnant friend who reported having people come up to her and put their hands on her stomach and ask things like "when are you due?" and stuff like that. Excuse Me? Since when does being pregnant give you permission to TOUCH someone?! My friend once had enough and told one woman to get her hands off her and the woman responded with "no need to be rude." And my friend was like "And touching someone without permission isn't rude?!" Another time she simply said "I'm not pregnant" The look on the woman, she said, was priceless! LOL I think I'll remember that one for if it happens to me.

I could rant about rude people for days.

BB
Lilu

[MystyPines]

I have had doors slammed in my face, elevators shut in front of me, people cut in front of me in the cashier line --What ever happened to chivalry or just plain old common courtesy? Last week at my office building, I was the "first" one at the elevator waiting to go up. I had my hands full with a large box in my hands. People started to accumulate after me waiting for the elevator to open, they all pushed their way ahead of me and now the elevator was full, so the doors closed without me. It's amazing how people are these days. I have always been taught to hold doors open, help someone carry things if their hands are full, assist someone in picking items that fell on the ground, and the "thank you's," "your welcome's" and "after you." It's so easy to get frusrated and think maybe I should be colder, harder and totally self-absorbed like these people, if you can't beat them, join them. But I cannot. I cannot change who I am......:)

[Mariposa De La Luna]

Originally posted by Lilu

I also had a pregnant friend who reported having people come up to her and put their hands on her stomach and ask things like "when are you due?" and stuff like that. Excuse Me? Since when does being pregnant give you permission to TOUCH someone?! My friend once had enough and told one woman to get her hands off her and the woman responded with "no need to be rude." And my friend was like "And touching someone without permission isn't rude?!" Another time she simply said "I'm not pregnant" The look on the woman, she said, was priceless! LOL I think I'll remember that one for if it happens to me.


If someone does that to you just say "I won't be rude like you and not ask to touch someone So can I feel you up now?!?"
or "You've touched mine now can I touch yours?"

I hate it when you're in that kind of a situation and you are so stunned you don't say anything and then later all sorts of things are going through your mind of what you should have done.

[Kaylara]

If you've read my other post about my brothers, then you know my position on kids. I think that they should be treated with respect, and I have found that for the most part this makes them respect you.
Miles (the 12 yr old) is one of the most polite kids I know, when he is not around the parents. The same with the six year old (Nicky). They are so good when they aren't in the presence of my mother and her boyfriend that it amazes me the change that occurs the minute they step in the door of their house.
My mother and father in law say that they are some of the best behaved kids they've seen. (And that's saying a lot because my mother in law is an elementary school teacher.)
What pisses me off is when kids have to resort to getting negative attention because that is the only kind of attention that their parents will give them. The thought process goes something like this:
"Mommy doesn't pay attention to me."
"Mommy doesn't pay attention to me if I do something good."
"Mommy pays attention to me when I am bad."
Therefore, to the kids, negative attention is better than no attention at all.
I think that this is a huge problem in our country. People are way too quick to blame the different media outlets for their children's problems, but refuse to accept that they are the main influence in the child's life.
Good Manners revolve around respect. If people are brought up without understanding respect, how could they learn about good manners?

*just my rant*
Kaylara

[Swanspirit]

Merry Merry,
and at the risk of disagreeing with some and deeply agreeing with others,
let me just say that teaching a child to be respectful isnt done by being
rude to the child. Aside from out and out abuse , as in yanking chidlren by the arm or any
other appendage, have a look at the Emergency Room statistics for dislocations for
children by yanking, and you will see how horrible an abuse that is.
I think when we stop taking into consideration a childs age and developmental level and expect behavior from a child that is beyond their years we have lost sight of the humanity of the child, and expectations of "behaviors" to conform with what society expects which basically amounts to the SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP expectation from children is way off the mark. All you are teaching is that you are bigger and and louder and ruder, than they are, and they probably dont understand any of other than the intimidation factor.
It deeply angers me to see children treated that way, and to see people angry at chidlren for doing what comes naturally at different ages is pure ignorance and another type of abuse, and the message sent to the child is " I care more about what other people think of ME than how I treat you". if this is how you teach children to be considerate of others , you are completely missing the mark, and I do beleive that children do need to learn to be considerate but when they are capable of learning it, not before.
Also one of my pet peeves are people with little to no child rearing experience pronouncing on other peoples parenting, and it never ceases to amaze me that these are the ones that expect children to be little automatons, get up ,do this , go to bed at exactly the RIGHT time, sit down shut up, etc etc. And these are INEVITABLY the same people that spend some time with children and cant stand it . ( my personal pet peeve and rant there )
And I do speak from experience, I have three healthy adult polite children, with two of them with children of their own. My children were well behaved in other peoples homes because I watched them not because i Yelled at them, and because I took the time and trouble to teach them.
I also have worked as a pediatric nurse for over 5 years; and also worked with abused children and adolescents for over ten years, so I know that limits have to be set and children need to learn, but they will learn what you do , not what you say, and if you teach them to be ashamed they will grow up having shame, for being children, and It saddens me to see children being shamed for just being children. Isnt there enough shame in this world ? that we dont need to teach one more child to be ashamed?
Love and light
Swannie

[Earth Walker]

If I could have one wish, it would be to change the
events of my childhood, and to have a quiet, peaceful
growing up instead of being a target for my mother's
anger, and using the closest thing she grabbed and
used on my head.:eek:

One Can Never Have Too Many Cats! :D

[Swanspirit]

Merry Merry ,
To have a second childhood,and there are deep healing techniques for what you experienced.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Love and more hugs
Swannie

[Mariposa De La Luna]

I'm sorry Swanspirit but I don't get everything you're saying.

Respecting children involves respecting what they can or cannot do. "sit down and shut up" is not respecting children and not what we're saying they should do. I have an 11mo old and when we go to restaurants I don't tell him to shut up because I know he doesn't understand, I hope other people do too. On the same hand we didn't go anywhere this weekend and are behind on errands because he had a cold and I knew he would be absolutely miserable out and about and would also be very cranky. I also have an 8 yr old who knows how to use an indoor voice, that is not the same as shutting up, and she has been taught that since she was very little. Definitely school age children should know how to use a moderate volume when speaking indoors and I've seen many who do not.

"and to see people angry at chidlren for doing what comes naturally at different ages is pure ignorance and another type of abuse, and the message sent to the child is " I care more about what other people think of ME than how I treat you". if this is how you teach children to be considerate of others , you are completely missing the mark, and I do beleive that children do need to learn to be considerate but when they are capable of learning it, not before. "

Being ashamed of your childs behavoir is not as you stated above but it should be a wake up call 4 an area of good manners you may have missed or forgotten about until you see it. I don't tell my daughter she should be ashamed but we talk of the situation and why you should have done something differently, of course she's old enough to understand.

I don't disagree with you that what you state is not productive, positive parenting. You should be aware of your child's limitations and be considerate of others. If you have a 2 yr old that cannot sit still get take out, please don't go to a restaurant without a playground. That is what I'm saying at least. The only exceptions are single parents who need a change of pace every once and a while or can't find a sitter. I know they have a tough time but I don't think that gives them a total excuse to be inconsiderate of others.

[Swanspirit]

Merry Merry,
But in different words. I wouldnt expect a two year old to be able to sit in a restaurant as long as an older child, but I wouldnt treat the child badly for behaving like a two year old. What you are saying is exactly what is needed, you TEACH your children slowly, as they are able to learn , that is showing respect for them, as children and as human beings.
( And really, if you are dining out and can't a have a little tolerance for a child in a restaurant,
and expect them to behave like little adults then,you dont have a realistic idea of what children can and cannot do at different ages. )
I love what you said about talking about it, that is exactly what I meant , not just telling a child to sit down and shut up, that doesnt help anything. I am glad to hear there are parents like you :>
Love and Hugs
Swannie