Aoi's Altar

[Aoibheal]

I know it has been a while, but I just wanted to say thanks.

Thank you for all the abundance in my life.

Thank you for the home I have finally found.

Bless me with the courage and strength to work again.

I need your guidance now so I may find my path.

Forever shall you remain in my dance.

[Aoibheal]

Today is another beautiful day and I thank you for it.
My parents are going to be giving me my little brother for the next two weeks to watch over and all I ask is that you grant me the extra patience to make it through. He is very trying with me, but I know he does not mean any harm. Let this be a powerful time of growth between me and him because I feel the distance of our ages pulling at us. He is young and does not understand, but he loves me the same.

Thank you, I will dance for you today because for the next two weeks I will not be able to dance.

[Aoibheal]

Thank you for the many blessings in my life and for the rain you gave me last night.

Please lend your strength and courage to my Aunt Judy. She is undertaking one of the most difficult tasks a mother can take. She is choosing to take her three young and leave her bastard of a husband behind. Grant her strength of heart and give her young ones peace. It will be hard for them, they love their father so.

[Aoibheal]

Many are my thanks this day. For a wonderful new friend, a gorgeous day, and hopes of a wonderful evening.

[Aoibheal]

Thank you for the rain this morning and afternoon. The thunderstorm was inspiring. The child has been excellent so far, I am so grateful and optimistic about his stay here with us.

[Aoibheal]

I feel the darkness coming back. I know I must embrace both, but I don't think I can handle it at the moment.
I know you will guide me through these trials.

[Aoibheal]

Thank you for another rainy day. My a/c is working today and for that I am most thankful for as well.

I am so tired. Let me lay my head on your lap and rest a while. My head is so quiet...the world is so loud.

[Aoibheal]

Thank you for helping me to get my permit. I am well on the road to my own independence and this is another step to get me on my way. I hope you bless me with the same luck this following weekend when I hope to take the test for my actual license.

This week has been a challenge, but I am loving it. Thank you so much.

[Aoibheal]

Just a few more days. Thank you for the strength you have given me so far. Even though I feel like I'm falling apart trying to make everyone happy, I will remember to take care of myself once this week is over.

[Aoibheal]

Last night was truly a test. I am very happy with how things have turned out. It was hard, but Tim and I are only closer to each other now I think.

The house is all mine until later in the afternoon and though I have a lot to do I will not forget to honor you today.

[Aoibheal]

Please I really need your help. I don't know what to do or what to think. Please just help us get through this.

[Aoibheal]

Everything has turned around in such a wonderful way. What I had to do to make it happen was a hard choice and sometimes I do feel sad about it, but sometimes these things must be done.

We're making choices to live healthier lives now. Planning our escape from this negative area. Please guide us in our choices for housing for our move. We can't decide whether we want to buy a home when we first move down there, or rent for another 6 months and save a bit more. We're leaning a bit more toward saving, we both feel it is a good idea to have extra money.

I feel so free now. I have my license. I have a man that loves and adores me, who wants to share my life but not control it. Everything is just going so well right now, thank you. I really needed it.

[Aoibheal]

Please...give me guidance, give me strength...today has been really hard so far. Yesturday was hard too. I just need some comforting and reassurance that everything will be okay, that we will get through this.

I always muck things up...to err is to be human though right? I can't be a goddess all the time...

[Aoibheal]

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.


I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

I know it is from the bible..but it really isn't all that of a bad book if you can get past some things. There are some really good passages in there, no matter ones faith...

[Aoibheal]

How do you convince the person you love the most that you aren't going to leave them? That is the only thing I am struggling with right now and its taking all of me. I just don't know how to show him that he is the only one for me. The only one that makes my soul feel complete.
I wake up in the morning next to him and my soul wants to dance.
Each time I hear him say "I love you" it makes my soul smile.
Every touch from him feels like electric, when he hugs me or kisses me it makes me weak...

And I've gone and ruined that. I always muck up. I just want him to know that I love him more then anything in the world and that he means everything to me...

[Aoibheal]

Can you have love without trust?
How do you rebuild that?

I just want him. I just want him back. I'm tired of crying all the time. I'm tired of sometimes feeling unloved and unwanted by my own soulmate.

What do I do? What can I do? I feel so helpless...

[Aoibheal]

So its been a while. Just needed to say thanks for the help over the last year, I really needed it. Things with me and Tim, while not perfect, are really great. Its taken a lot of work from us both, but we're really happy together.

Just looking for a little peace today. I'm so messed up lately sometimes its hard to tell which way is up. I think its time to just release my "dad" from my life. After all the years of abuse and torment from him and that side of my family its time to just let it go. I think I know what to do to make it happen.

Please, please give me the strength to tell my friend that I can't move back down there where she lives. I love her dearly, but I want to be near my family. I can't go back to living 6-7 hours away from them again.

Thanks, feels better just writing and getting some of this out.