I'm so fat... I had no idea...

[PandoraHealer]

My mom just uploaded some pictures of an event we went to a few weekends ago. Theres a few pictures of me sitting down with the dogs.... I had no idea i was that big....
I mean... i knew i was overweight but.... god....
Its one of those things where, when you see one of those big girls and its like "woah"... thats what i did... I want to die... actually I want to barf my dinner up and eat a box of exlax.....

I don't want to look like this..... oh my god...

anyway- just needed a hug... I'm balling my eyes out... :sniffsnif
heres the pic that made me see how damn big I am....

[Lorrie]

Hun, I quit smoking about 8 months ago, I WAS a size 7. I am now wearing a 15, nicotine controls alot of functions of the body, now my body is all out of whack. It can take a year to get metabolism working again. I cannot stand to see myself in the mirror. I even tried going for several weeks on 1500 calories a day, I just kept gaining weight.( I was also doing 40 minutes of exercise a day) It was out of control and nothing I can do until my body remembers how to work correctly. It really sucks!!! _whistle_

[PandoraHealer]

ugh- thats what started the problem. I quit smoking (several things) the day i found out i was pregnant with my son (2 years ago)- and between that and the baby fat- and then the next baby- i'm just totally f-ed.

tempting to start up again- just to loose weight but then i have a different problem.... and i've grown quite fond of my lungs...

congrats on quitting- maybe "hell" will freeze over and we'll both loose 80 lbs... lol

[blackroseivy]

I don't even have the excuse of a child - BUT, I am bi-polar & struggling with a medication that makes me constantly hungry (I am hoping to change this soon).

My weight just recently went UP rather than the DOWN I was hoping for, when I applied for school. I went off the deep end, & now I'm trying to get back on the wagon.

There's support here for you, hon - you'll make it!!

[GEBS]

big hugs!! :hugz:

I understand. I went through that when I was preparing for the wedding. And then the wedding pics!! Ack!! I have never looked like this before.

It was not a total surprise for me. I knew that I was gaining weight. It was obvious. I have had health issues that were not helping and no health insurance to get them taken care of. It was awful. But then I remember that my husband loves me and I am more happy than I have ever been in my life. Anything I am feeling about myself and how I look doesn't matter when I see myself through his eyes. He worships me and would rather look at me than anyone else in the world. That's a great feeling. When I am feeling down I remind myself of that.

I don't know if you have had this issue but I have had some people make comments about the weight I've gained. Those people are just showing me how worthless they are to me. Some people are idiots and resort to grade school insults which show their intelligence and character. If you don't deal with that I'm glad. Maybe I just needed to say it because it's been on my mind lately. People think they're clever when actually they're just assholes.

[October]

:hugz: Been there, Honey. Am there, Honey!

I'm one of those people with a fantastic self-image. No one can possibly think I'm hotter than I do, lol! But when I walk past a mirror, I have to do a double-take. Is that me??? Are you kidding?? Is that my butt?? My arms?? My God, what happened??

Recently I've had to reign myself in massively, and my campus is huge, so I walk a lot. But every step, painful though it is, makes me happy, because it's doing me good. And I detest walking. Lol.

I'm sending you calming and healing energies, because I'm going through the same thing. :hugz:

[Brightshores]

:hugz: :hugz: I've struggled with my weight for most of my life, so I know where you're coming from.

Just try to remember, although I know how very hard this is, that YOU are much more than a number on a scale. YOU are a wonderful person with skills, talents, hopes, dreams, and beauty all your own. Sure - you can try to lose weight and do healthy things - and that will likely make you healthier. Note that I say "healthier," not "better" or "happier" - when it comes down to it, what you weigh does not in any way reflect who you are. :hugz:

[Lorrie]

ugh- thats what started the problem. I quit smoking (several things) the day i found out i was pregnant with my son (2 years ago)- and between that and the baby fat- and then the next baby- i'm just totally f-ed.

tempting to start up again- just to loose weight but then i have a different problem.... and i've grown quite fond of my lungs...

congrats on quitting- maybe "hell" will freeze over and we'll both loose 80 lbs... lol



Well, we do have a cold snap on the way!!!!:T:T:T:T:T:T

[blackroseivy]

I walk - at least, I WAS walking very regularly & then I stopped - & voil`a... 12 lbs.

I am making a real effort to do that again EVERY DAY except Sundays, however tedious it may be, because obviously it makes a difference!

[ravenmyst]

i quit 8/01, developed pcos, gained 60 lbs in a yr, then crept up another 20, I have a very active job and dont eat enough according to the doc, and still no loss, at least the gain stopped, :hugz: i feel your pain

[Lady_Door]

*hugs* Try and keep a positive attitude.

[DarkWitch]

My mom just uploaded some pictures of an event we went to a few weekends ago. Theres a few pictures of me sitting down with the dogs.... I had no idea i was that big....
I mean... i knew i was overweight but.... god....
Its one of those things where, when you see one of those big girls and its like "woah"... thats what i did... I want to die... actually I want to barf my dinner up and eat a box of exlax.....

I don't want to look like this..... oh my god...

anyway- just needed a hug... I'm balling my eyes out... :sniffsnif
heres the pic that made me see how damn big I am....

Look im moving out there soon and im a big girl my self and soon you will have a buddy to get together with and go out walking and stuff too_pounce_

[wolfjan1]

OK, go to the Dr. Make sure that all your lab work is good and you are healthy enough to start walking. Then take off with those big dogs.
Stock your fridge with fruit, salad veggies and yogurt, and stay away from the "DIET" foods, ESPECIALLY soda. IF you are a vegetarian, Amen, you have a good start, because you know were to get your proteins. The rest we can discuss later, if you don't want to look it up yourself. You NEED protein, fats and carbohydrates. What a lot of people don't think about is that vegetables are carbohydrates and turn in to sugar to supply your body with energy. BUT, eaten raw, or steamed, (don't boil them to death) they are really good for you. I keep celery, carrots cut up in the fridge along with pineapple, watermelon, granny Smith and red delicious apples. I eat something raw every time I feel a llitle hungry, munchy or frustrated.
That being said, _pounce_ :abanana: :hugz: :hugz: :hugz: :huddle: :fpompoms :fpompoms :fpompoms
It's time to lighten up on yourself a little. You can actually eat whatever you want, as long as it's portioned controlled.
Those of us still in the doldrums about our weight commiserate with you. And support you.
Here's a shoulder,
Pm me anytime you want, I am in the same boat. Except my diabetic medicine and insulin have the side effects of gaining weight.
Stress does it to you too, luv.
Blessings,
wj:abanana:
Blessings,
wj

[wolfjan1]

Yes, people can be butt heads(referring to the place where they usually keep it).
But not to worry, All of us can get through this.
With support encouragement, and lotsa Hugs,
wj

[dragoncrone]

Whatever you do, DO IT BECAUSE YOU LOVE YOURSELF! You are a fantastic person and you deserve to have a long happy healthy life. Becoming a little less heavy will enable you to feel better and do more fun stuff. Be positive and don't beat yourself up, okay??

One other thing - which I NEVER would have known, if I hadn't worked in a gym for a while:

Stay AWAY from 'crash' diets. People NEVER lose weight and keep it off, and this is why: When you all of a sudden deprive your body of food, it goes "Oh no! She;s trying to starve us to death! Everybody into Emergency Mode!" This means your body thinks it isn't getting enough food, AND IT HANGS ON TO EVERY LITTLE FAT MOLECULE, for dear life. The best way is to eat healthy AND eat five or six little tiny meals throughout the day, like 3 hours apart or so. That way you sort of 'fake out' your body - it's still getting food so it learns to get by on less and less. And you really will lose .

I hope this doesn't sound preachy or weird, just thought it is some handy information.
Peace & Blessings -

[darkchild]

Please don't let a number or a preconceived idea of what you *should* look like make you feel bad. If you aren't happy with yourself, then do something about it, but don't let someone elses idea of acceptable make you feel less than you are. Your worth is measured by who you are on the inside, not what you look like on the outside. I know it's hard to see pictures like that. I went from a size 3 to a size 16-18 after my kids were born. I lived with it for a while and then *I* decided that I was done with it and did something good for myself. It wasn't easy and sometimes I wondered why I was working so hard, but I wanted it, so I kept going, still am working on it. ((((HUGS)))) to you and know that there are people out there that understand what you are going through.

[Stormbeard]

There are reasons but there are never excuses.

Drink more water. Get out in the street for a few hours a week and exercise. Get into shape and do it for nobody but yourself.

[Cindlady2]

Good Luck to you! It's a tough battle! I've had 5 kids and gained (and kept) 25# with the first 4. It took a long time but I got it off! :)Then I got pregnant with my 5th and gained it all back! :( I was in my 30's then and I lost little of what I gained. The older you get the harder it is so if your not happy with your weight.... get it off now. And yes, no crash diets!
Again.... Good Luck!

[Annorah]

:hugz:

You are beautiful!

[bellaluca]

Hi,
Just wanted to add my support as I can relate as well. Actually last night I had a dream that my dad called me fat, and it's sticking in my mind and I can't seem to shake it. Don't feel alone, you absolutely are not.

[*GrumpButt*]

I used to be 255 pnds after i had my daughter... i became a vegiutarian and w/in a year of tht and exersize i git back down to 165 b/f i git preganat w/my son.. i am now @ 178 and have to lost tht 12 pnds again.. i know its hard hon but i know you can do it!

[LadyWinter]

This whole thread is making me rethink my quitting smoking this friday lol....

If you decide to lose weight dont be disappointed if it takes awhile...one of the unfair things in life...easy to put on ....hard to take off.

Winter

[Xentor]

Being big does not make you an awful person. Being an asshole does. One can be tiny and awful, one can be big and wonderful, and vice versa. It isn't the body size that matters, it's how one behaves.

If you're going to work on your size, don't look at your weight. Look at your body mass index instead. Use a tape measure. Excercise creates muscle tissue, which is heavier than fat. So expect to tone up and increase in weight.

If you must weigh yourself, do it once a day, at the same time every day. Our weight can fluctuate wildly during a day. It will also fluctuate during a month. Get used to it that your weight will go up and down in a monthly cycle, apart from going up or down due to your diet and excercise levels.

If you're drinking coffee: stop. Take tea instead. Green tea, no sugar (use honey, if sweetening is desired). Coffee will make you burn your food faster, which increases the amount of nutrients your body takes in. By switching to green tea, the digestion speed slows down. Expect to feel hungry for no appearant reason and battle it by having fruit ready to eat.

Do consult your doctor, especially when you or your family suffer from kidney failure or diabetes.

[Merrilyn]

Just offering support.. Right there with ya, honey! :hugz:

[GothicNymph]

im also right there with you, need to lose some weight for health issues, i have high blood pressure so i need to do it for my health. i do live in your area, feel free to pm me if you want and maybe we can kind of support each other. :hugz:

[WitchJezebel]

First thing you do is stop feeling sorry for yourself. I can say that, I went through the same thing. I've lost about 15 lbs and I want (or I should say need) to lose about 50 - 60 more. First off - GET MOVING. Check with your doctor and make sure he clears you for activities and go for a walk. Lots of walks. I see a pup in the picture there of you and they are a great motivator. My old geezer still wants to go for long walks as often as possible. There's loads of exercises you can do at home, the internet is full of sites that can help.

Also, work on your fat/caloric intake. Maybe your doctor can make suggestions. First off, someone said above (I think wolfjan1) to not use 'diet' products. First off, they're nasty and they're loaded with junk you don't want or need. I'll use reduced fat products sometimes, but not very often, I don't like the taste of alot of them. Up your intake of fresh fruits and vegetables, move away from overprocessed and empty carbohydrates and eat more complex whole grains. Cut back on full fat dairy products and meat and start eating more lean proteins like chicken breasts and fish and eat lean beef and/or pork less often. You don't have to eat animal protein every day, I eat beans as a protein source a few times a week and I'm satisfied. Also, don't deprive yourself of little snacks every now and then - A small scoop of reduced fat ice cream can satisfy you just as much as the full fat versions. This isn't a diet but a lifestyle change and you've got to want it and want to do it.... forever.

[RayneStorm]

I'm right there with you too offering support. I saw the picture and I gotta tell ya... I dont think it's as bad as you think it is. You look beautiful! (so do the dogs too) but I definitely hear you about the weight thing. I look in the mirror and I do a bit of a double take as well. Mind you I did just have a kid 4 months ago (was almost 200 lbs when I had him and was about 120 or so before) but still... I have absolutely no clothes to wear!! Plus I'm planning on quiting smoking VERY soon and I'm scared about that cuz I dont want to put on any more weight either!
But hang in there and do what you have to do and time will pass in no time at all.
You are not alone!!
Rayne

[wolfjan1]

That's EXACTLY right! You are better off eating your five fruit and vegetable servings a day as little "meals," and feel satisfied all day. Plus, you can reward yourself one time a week with 1 brownie, or one of the four servings in a pint of ice cream (ridiculous, but true) or 1 serving of your favorite food. That way you don't feel deproved all the time.
It's working for me. Slowly, but that's the best way. it gives your skin time to keep up with you.
Moisturize EVERWHERE! I like the carrier almond oil. Take care of your feet. Indulge in your bath. Treat yourself like the royalty that you are.
Blessings,
wj

[Tullip Troll]

I have a few weeks to go before this critter comes out, and then I too will be right there with you.

Just don't get too down because nothing makes you eat more then depression and obsession. Make a few small consistant changes and it will start.

(((((hugs))))) it's true chubby and nice is better then skinny and bitchy.

[Tullip Troll]

That's EXACTLY right! You are better off eating your five fruit and vegetable servings a day as little "meals," and feel satisfied all day. Plus, you can reward yourself one time a week with 1 brownie, or one of the four servings in a pint of ice cream (ridiculous, but true) or 1 serving of your favorite food. That way you don't feel deproved all the time.
It's working for me. Slowly, but that's the best way. it gives your skin time to keep up with you.
Moisturize EVERWHERE! I like the carrier almond oil. Take care of your feet. Indulge in your bath. Treat yourself like the royalty that you are.
Blessings,
wj


I like the indulge in bath, I think it's a great way to diet, indulge in things like baths and entertainment or pampering so you won't have to indulge in food.

[Tifa Lockhart]

Just wanted to add my support and also say that you can be big and beautiful... personally I am not a small girl... I'm a size 15 and I could lose some weight but it's the way we carry ourselves and the way we see ourselves that people notice more. I have confidence in my looks and carry myself confidently and that is what people see, that despite my size I am beautiful. You are beautiful... just see that in yourself and the rest of the world will see it too!
Much love and blessings... and support. If you ever wanna talk p.m me.

[Twinkle]

You are beautiful. I can understand how you feel...but you've got to stop hating yourself and take some positive action.

I want to give you a big hug and a lot of support.

[kismet]

You look like a lovely person to me. Don't be so hard on yourself! Photos can be so unflattering to begin with, nevermind if you are sitting down.

If you really feel the need to lose weight, I agree with what the others have posted. A positive attitude is key!

[Moonlite Faery]

I know how you feel. and i personally think you look beautiful! im definately not as small as i used to be. in one point in college i could fit into a size 2, a size 2!!! now im about a size 12. i started gaining weight after i became engaged, and then after we moved up to oregon. i was sad and depressed and hung around the house all day playing games. ive slimmed down a little since then and its a tough fight. i even had my grandma tell me to my face that i was fat 2 christmas' ago, yeah, that didnt help the confidence any. but like GEBS said she has a husband who loves her for who she is and so do i and sometimes i need him to say it to remind me. we all have people who love us for who we are, not for what we look like. and photos do suck! thats why head shots are so much better :D

[Morrigan_Wolfwind]

As someone from the other end of the spectrum, I can tell you that it's just as hard to be skinny as it is to be overweight. I'm around 110 pounds, which is good with my frame but technically the absolute minimum for my height.

The fact that I'm 110lbs makes people jealous, but I can't skip more than one meal or else I'll feel horrible for at least two days, even after I get back on my normal eating schedule. It's also VERY hard for me to gain muscle, which leads to insecurities about my appearance--"I hardly have ANY fat to lose! Why is it taking so long for me to get toned?!" I've been working out for two months and I've only JUST NOW started to tone up someplace besides my stomach.

Everyone's already said what I was going to say. Just know that skinny people don't have it any easier just because they weigh less.

[Glowy]

_pounce_ _pounce_

I admire the courage to post a pic. when you are feeling most vulnerable.

The easiest thing is to actually look at what is considered a portion- truly... it is frightening. 12 chips- ?1/2 cup of cereal with 1/2 cup of milk.? 1/4 cup of cooked pasta-" a card sized portion of a meat.? Yikes!! but that is what they mean by a portion. If you start paying attention to portions and make an effort to walk more and I mean little changes like parking further away and taking stairs when you can. The weight will drop, slow but steady... and you have a better chance of keeping it off. I wish you the best of health._pounce_

and, you really are beautiful_pounce_

[ashla86]

Yeah, that happened to me too. I went through really bad depression when I was a teenager and gained a lot of weight. I was a size five and went to a fourteen. But then I started losing a lot of weight without noticing and am down to a nine. I didn't realise it until I had to start wearing a belt. It's weird how that happens, it's our bodies so how can we not notice?

[SidneyCozzoi]

Lots of hugs! I think we all know what it's like! I did a photo shoot back in Jan and I was over 180lbs at the time (I was living with my ex who was a feeder) anyhow, I'm done to 160 and I saw pics of me recently and I was shcked to see that I looked ike a BLIMP!!! It's tough to get past that. I hope we can all find the strength to love ourselves.

[Wintersteel]

_pounce_ :hugz: I can relate.. I have been struggling with my weight for the last 7 years.. I just rebounded hard from a massive weight loss.. its true you gain it back and more.. But I always remind myself, I'm beautiful.. even when I look in the mirror and doubt.. I keep in mind all the good things I have done in this world.. And all the people who like me for me... not for the outer image I present.. don't get me wrong... I am conscious of everything I eat.. and I would like to exercise more.. _inabox_ Hang in there.. we will all make it through our weight woes..

Love and Light!

[Sethserpenthus]

If it's any consolation, I had pretty much the same thing happen. This is why I hate it when other people take pictures of me... I always wind up with a frog-like double chin or something.