Relationships w/ non pagans

[Grey]

What are your opions with:

1) Dating non-pagans

2) Marrying non-pagans

3) Friendships w/ non-pagans


just wondering.....

[Yvonne Belisle]

Many of us started out that way. Perhaps they are just potential pagans. :)

[Arduinna]

Originally posted by Grey
What are your opions with:

1) Dating non-pagans

2) Marrying non-pagans

3) Friendships w/ non-pagans


just wondering.....

1) I'm married, so I only date hubby, lol. Who is pagan
2) see above, if I was ever single again I would seek out someone with similar beliefs. No fundys for me, sorry.
3) ha, many of my friends are non pagan. Usually non practicing christians.

[Twilight Garden]

1) Dating non-pagans -
I've dated non-pagans in my past and some turned out to be very decent, even long, relationships. They have to be very open minded. I will not bury my beliefs for the sake of relationship. I never asked that we follow the same beliefs, just that they don't try to make me change them.

2) Marrying non-pagans -
I'm married to (basically) a pagan. I would have married a similar minded non--pagan, had I fallen as deeply in love with one and new that he was the one for me. If, in the future, my husband opens his eyes to new religions and strays from paganism, I will still love and respect him as much as I do now so long as the love and respect are returned.

3) Friendships w/ non-pagans -
Most of my friends are pagan, but some of my very good friends are not. My feelings on friendship are pretty much the same as they were for dating.

[MammaStar]

Originally posted by Grey
What are your opions with:

1) Dating non-pagans

2) Marrying non-pagans

3) Friendships w/ non-pagans


just wondering.....

1. Well since I didnt' become pagan till about 3 1/2 years ago....I date all kinds of people. Or I should say I did in the past. I've been exclusive with Eshallet for 2 1/2 years now. He's not Pagan either. If I had to put him in a category, it'd be Agnostic.

2. See note above. *feel free to email Eshallet with your thoughts* :p

3. Makes no difference to me. Since my friends are a wonderful group of many different people and religious paths. Ranging from Southern Baptist to Muslim. I care for them all for the person they ARE, not which *G-D* they worship. As long as they are good people, they can follow the yellow brick road. :D

[Faery-Wings]

Originally posted by Grey
What are your opions with:

1) Dating non-pagans

2) Marrying non-pagans

3) Friendships w/ non-pagans


just wondering.....

I feel pretty much the same as everyone else who has spoken. I am married, so dating doesn't apply. But if for some reason, I was single, I wouldn't date or not date because of religion. Sheesh, it would be hard enough for a 33 yo with two kids to get a date as it is! Seriously, I don't know if I would feel comfortable being with someone who had strong views against mine. Like Arduinna, I couldn't see myself with a fundy- too radical of a difference, unless we both could somehow move beyond it and respect our Paths. Tough as a dating situation, IMO. If I became Pagan after being married to a Fundy, I would have a lot more at stake and be more willing to work with it. My hubby is an Atheist and he is absolutely fine with my beliefs even though he doesn't agree.

Friends- I have no problem with religion at all in a friendship. My cousin has recently converted to her hubby's church and has been "saved." I don't know how much she would understand of me, so I just don't talk about it.
I care for them all for the person they ARE, not which *G-D* they worship.
Agreed!

[Valnorran]

My wife is Roman Catholic (they're kind of hard to avoid in my neck of the woods) but she focuses almost entirely on the Blessed Mother, so i tend to think of her as an unconscious goddess worshipper. I once postulated that with their emphasis on the saints, perhaps the Church of Rome isn't so far removed from polytheism as it likes to think!

[Nissala]

I have only be pagan for about a year and am married to a non-pagan for almost 12 years. Freedom of religion is for everyone as long as it is respected amongst dates, spouses and friends as such I do not see any problem with dating, marrying or having friends that are non-pagan....to each his own...everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

;)

[Myst]

From personal experience, the only thing that matters to me is mutual respect. My fiance isn't Pagan but respects my beliefs, talks to me about them, and even participates in circles etc. if we ask him for help, simply because he wants to help.

My ex wouldn't even let me talk about Paganism because "all religions are stupid".

This is half the reason why the former is my fiance and the latter my ex :)

Most of my friends are Pagan, but a lot aren't too. As long as we respect eachother it isn't a problem.

[Flar's Freyja]

I have several Christian friends whose devotion to their paths I admire and respect, but I don't feel that I can come out of the closet with them. I think this is kind of sad, because I do believe that many Christians and Pagans are basically walking the same path, just in different ways......

I'm excited that the new pagan community I've been involved in establishing has welcomed a few Christians as members! This is working very well and has provided a comfort zone for non-pagan spouses and significant others.

I think that having the same spiritual path can greatly enhance a relationship, but as long as there is mutual respect and religion is not an issue, mixed relationships can definitely work.

[Phoenix Blue]

I don't know any non-Pagans who'd be my type, even if I were available. . .

[WandererInGray]

To divide someone up on the basis of their religious beliefs is devisive and stupid in my opinion.

People are people...and they're either my friends or not, my loved ones or not, based on what's inside them....*shakes head*...not what deity they chose to believe in.

That to me, is as bad as someone not liking me, just because I'm a Pagan...

[Flar's Freyja]

Wanderer - your post brings to mind a recent experience. There's a couple I've known for years and we've had a great relationship. Their son was visiting from out of town and we all ran into each other. I noticed that he and his wife were wearing huge, beautiful pentagrams, and of course this launched a discussion.......

They have completely changed their opinion of me, after being crazy about me and even bringing their granddaughter to visit me at work - and I helped them adopt her about five years ago.

Haven't seen them since.

[Raynewitch]

My boyfriend is the worlds biggest Athiest so it really doesnt bother me what his beliefs are as long as he treats me well :) Neither of us impose our beliefs on the other, and all in all he is very supportive of me and what I choose to do :)

Gotta love a man who hates shopping but will trail around behind me for hours in Occult shops :)

[Old Witch]

I've been married to a Christian for 29 yrs........and I've always been Pagan.........don't know why, but it works for us..........

[Rubi Waters]

I started my pagan path just a few years ago....which my currant (christian) boyfriend encouraged me to explore. so I've only dated non-pagans but none of the others would have accepted me if I had been one then...he does...and we've been together for 7 years so even though we arn't legally married we say we are. so the dating and married thing applys togehter.
my only pagan friends are here on this board...everyone else I know is christian and aside from hubby no one knows about me....but i don't condem them for what they believe. everyone is entitled to thier opinion and should be respected for it.

[Silver]

It is good to see open minded people these days..
But I must agree w/ some who said that they could not get as close to their non-pagan freinds. I unfortuneatly am in an area were the pagans (99% wiccan + me the only runer) stay underground. I find this to be sad....

[Earthcup]

I get along fine with most people as long as I don't bring up sports, religon, philosophy, politics and economics.

I'm equally close to most of my friends I suppose. Some people I discuss religon with, some politics and some personal issues. I don't think anyone I know knows everything about me but then again, the only person who needs that much info is me. :D

Half the people I know are Christian and we either agree to disagree, which is fabulous, or the subject is simply avoided out of respect for our friendship.

[shnen]

1) dating - as long as they respect my path, altho it makes life easier if they are.

2) Marrying - :shaker: not ready to marry anyone at the moment, lets get the dating thing covered first.

3) My family is all die hard christian (pentecostal) and they push it like anything onto me, but they don't know I am pagan. If they did they would try and do some demon posessing thingy on me. Eventually when I do want to give them heart attacks or sever all relations with them I will tell them.

As far as friends go, as long as they respect me and I respect them thats all that matters, they even ask questions, which I love! :)

[cherrywind]

I don't see a problem with dating/befriending/marrying a non-pagan at all. I've been dating a non-pagan for 2 1/2 years (and have lived with him for one, he's a very staunch athiest) and he's wonderfully respectful and very curious.
If both parties can respect the other's beliefs, what's the difference? It can make for some interesting conversations :).

[Grey]

Its good to see that the people here are open minded. I simply wanted to see the native attitude at this joint and it looks good
:boing::boing:

[Emaleth]

I actually dont know any pagans, except through the internet:( All of my friends are not - pagan and as long as my faith doesn't bother them, theirs don't bother me.

However, as far as marriage is concerned it is more complicated, because your partner may have different views on bringing up children, to what faith they should be raised.

But on the whole I don't think religion matters that much to me when it comes to contacts with other people. I'm a very tolerant person ;)

Blessed Be

[Ravensnest]

I've been pagan as long as I can remember :D My family was pretty much "white bread" christian. The catholic church, and later episcopal (liberal catholics lol). I grew up studying a lot of different religions (mom was a religion major) and made my decision based on all I had learned. My mother fortunately feels like I do, we are all walking the same path ultimately it's just how we choose to walk that works for each of us. My family is fully aware of my beliefs and are fine with it. My husband grew up fundmentalist pentecostal. Fortunately he didn't really agree with all of it and we work even though he's not pagan. We've been together for almost 10 years now and doing better than ever.

His family on the other hand knows nothing of my beliefs. I have respected my husband's wishes to not tell them anything. Now, he used to turn my books backwards so they couldn't see the bindings and I told him in our home I will not hide so that doesn't happen anymore he just doesn't invite them over as often.

There are some people I feel comfortable telling and others I don't. Although, if they ask me directly I will tell them the truth. My daughter will be raised as I was.. exposed to many different religions and when she's old enough she'll make her own choice. But, I will not hide my beliefs from her. My stepdaughters know nothing of my beliefs and I have told my husband be prepared.. I won't lie or hide from our daughter and she may well say something to her sisters.

As to friends.. I have some who are pagans and some who are not. As all others have stated mutual respect is all that matters.

[Witchy Cowgirl]

Not dating as my husband and I have been married 16 years come July 5th.

But as far as my friends go, all the Pagan friends I have are ya'll.

Like so many others have stated respect is the key word. I'm a Liberal Christian Witch. My parents are liberal Christians. So is my husbands family who are Native American so there are alot of Pagan influences on us there.

[Jeleia]

Most of my relationships are with non-pagans. To me it doesn't matter.

Marrying non-pagans~ My boyfriend isn't Pagan. But he respects my path, we're not married (yet.)

Friendships w/ non-pagans ~ my relationships with my friends are not determinded by religion, most of my friends are fairly open minded and don't follow a religion. I have a few Christian friends, but I don't know any other pagans expect for online.

[materra]

In the funny but true story category...A dear and deeply Christian friend sent me the link to this website...She is a true friend to have thoughts for my spiritual well being within my beliefs, access to information and new friends. :)

[bluecat]

It makes no difference to me. I am an equal opportunity kinda guy, race religion, ethinic origin is no problem for me, except that I don't date guys ... just gals.

Nobody's perfect ;)

Blue :cool:

[Starry Di]

as for dating and marriage, religion is just a religion ;) As long as the guy repects me and loves me for who I am, I'm happy.

As for friends, most of my pagan friends are on this board ;) I have a wiccan friend from another board, and other than that, my friends are christian :S not sure if they all practise that religion or not. Got a few friends that are jewish though :D :$

[Bryony]

from my extremely limited dating experience (ONE guy and I am seventeen), he was VERY christian, and didn't care. It was his parents who would have flipped a lid. Hey! The attraction was mutual, it kinda came up when we discussed stuff, but he was curious about it. A O K for me. then again, 99% of the town are strict christians.
Alot of my friends are christian, most of which don't know/care that I am a witch, the word of which was more frightening for them than the reality. Those that tried to 'convert' me thought that something was wrong when i pointed out to them that i was raised quasi-christian and went 'heathen' (as one called it who i no longer speak to).
Marraige to a non-pagan I am not sure about-- for one, how would we raise our children? :wah2: too far ahead for me to think.

[aluokaloo]

to me it doesn't matter, i don't hate/like/love/ignore most people based on
what they are, but who they are. I have friends from all walks of life, I have enemies, from all walks of life, however if I should ever get married, a big if, because I have come to the conclusion that no one in or out of there right mind would be able to put up with me for the rest of there days;) I would PREFER them to be a polytheist of some sort, or at least an aetheist.