Need info on family caregiver stuff

[thought_on_a_wind]

My Dad's in decently bad shape in conjunction with his current circumstance. He's 65 and has Parkinson's disease, Bi-polar disorder, Diabetes (I believe he has type B), and potentially has a bad heart. He has been living with his sister ever since my mom and him separated, and just recently my "aunt" (whom I've always had this suspiscion about) has finally showed her true colors.... finally pouncing a little too hard on him in conjunction with matters that aren't and never were her concern.

That being the case, it has become clearly evident that they cannot stay in the same home anymore. My birthday present from her was an unwilling participation in her ill will that I really don't feel like explaining past the fact that the "yelling therapy" if you will, has been detrimental to my Dad's health... He snaps back in defense and she keeps attacking him, until he's drained of what little energy he's conserved. That being the case, I'm trying to get as much info on the caregiver thing as I can because he needs to move out of there pronto... The type of info I'm looking for is more on the side of compiling resources and the such, financial aid- as I'm un-employed at the moment, but am the only one capable of taking care of him (my brother has two kids and a fiance, my sis isn't near the state of mind that is a necessity for such a task). Also I'm the oldest kid, so there's that traditional responsibility jazz as well. My Dad is sound of mind enough to get well along on his own I suppose, and I view a nursing home as a last resort because it would deal a fatal blow to my Dad's self-esteem. (not to mention that I don't have the money to put him in one that doesn't drug the living daylights out of their patients). But part of Parkinson's disease is the debilitating feeling that ones loved ones don't care about them, that they aren't worthy of help because what's the point?

As I said, I need some info on the matters of caregiving, and while I'm interested in the financial aid stuff I do need some advice on what to do, because this is new and scary territory. Thank you to anyone who has time to help point me in the right direction. So far the advice I'm finding on the net is associated with "non-secular" agendas.

[Lunacie]

I don't have any answers for you, and I'm interested in seeing if anyone else does. This is a question my granddaughter will be facing in the future as her daddy was diagnosed with Parkinson's 3 years ago at the age of 41. She will likely also be responsible for the care of her little sister who has recently been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Heavy load for one person to carry eh?

[thought_on_a_wind]

I don't have any answers for you, and I'm interested in seeing if anyone else does. This is a question my granddaughter will be facing in the future as her daddy was diagnosed with Parkinson's 3 years ago at the age of 41. She will likely also be responsible for the care of her little sister who has recently been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Heavy load for one person to carry eh?

most certainly is. My Aunt had to deal with this her whole life (never had a chance for a child hood either), her dad had Alzheimer's, she had to take care of all 6 of her siblings too, I've talked to her and she doesn't know what to tell me either...

[alwaysfallingup]

The first thing you might want to do is find your local community action agency. They'll be a non-profit entity that will probably handle a lot of different grant-based programs. I don't know about a lot of the specifics for seniors, because I worked for the Head Start program in our local CAA, but they'll likely have all sorts of programs and be able to refer you to more if they don't quite fit your needs.

Some of the programs that might help you that come to mind right away are Energy Assistance (seniors usually go to the top of the list for money to help make sure the heat stays on...this program is called LIHEAP here in Illinois), respite care so if he needs someone to stay with him while you go shopping or need to get out of the house you can call and get help, or even adult day care if you decide that sometime down the road you'd like to work during the day but he's progressed to a point where he shouldn't be alone. They'll also probably have some really good support programs for YOU, because being the sole caretaker of an adult relative can be lonely and stressful. Just look them up (you can usually get the community action agency info from your local health department) or ask around (maybe at the doctor's office, etc) to see what resources your community has.

Good luck and I hope you get all the help and support you need!

[DaNcInG_WiNd]

Go through your dad's physician and find out about a visiting nurses program and help getting the equipment you need for him. He is 65 which means if I remember right that he is eligible for medicare.

See if he has a secondary insurance that will cover what medicare doesn't. Look for a social services agency in the area that might have information about what to do. It's what we have done for my mom to this point.

If I come across more information I will share it. Hope this helps some.