Gah! I am ready to slit my wrists!

[CinnamonFaerie]

Thanks to those of you who responded to my prior thread. I thought all would be fine afterwards but no.

Evil incarnate barged in this weekend while I was home alone and gave me a guilt trip for 2 solid hours about how I'm trying to tear her and my father apart and she can't eat or sleep since she's stressed out since I'm trying to make her leave, and how I need to grow the hell up and that "you're entitled to your feelings but you're sorely mistaken if you think they are remotely valid since that's your immaturity and self-pity talking" and that she only wants what is best for me. She decided that since I won't agree to calling her Mom that she'll be my best friend instead but that I have to get over my snippiness and hatred toward her and that I need to find friends and a husband of my own. Excuse me? The husband part is none of her damn business and I have plenty of friends without adding her to the mix.

She's trying to tell me that the reason he doesn't say anything to me is that "men are just that way" and he doesn't know how to share us. At this point, I'm ready to go to court and dissolve the relationship although I don't even know if that's possible. I don't want anything to do with her and the rest of my family will gladly back me up on that and none of them have ever met her. And she's dictating what he will do with the rest of his life and that if I truly loved him I wouldn't cause him this much heartache. Whatever.

I just honestly don't know what to do. Everytime I try to figure a way to escape this situation, she has a way of finding me and forcing herself into my life. She even has the gall to tell me that my entire life up until this point was a lie (for example, my grandma raised me since my mom wasn't able to and I considered her to be my mom). I am so pissed off and frustrated that I'm blowing steam out my ears but yet I can't figure out to fix anything. I want her gone asap.

[Amanda Mitchell]

:hugz: for you

[WitchJezebel]

No Cinnamon, you won't slit your wrists - this woman is SO not worth it. I don't know how old you are but I'm convinced that your age may be one of the reasons she thinks she can bully you.

My advice? Stand up to her. Or better yet - wait until all's quiet at home and you 2 are the only ones there. Then barge into HER space and tell her that that was the LAST time that she invades your space and treats you like a child. If she wants respect, she needs to earn it, and if she doesn't like you or you living there, that's just tough noogies, SHE needs to get used to it because YOU are his daughter. Tell her that if she's got nothing constructive to say, then to keep her mouth shut and not speak to you anymore.

And then walk away. Don't argue, don't wait for her acknowledgement or her reaction and definitely don't pause whilst speaking. She's a bully and she's disrespectful and it sounds like she knows how to do it well. You probably don't have that kind of experience otherwise you might have told her so already. Always, always stand up for yourself, but in this case, until you get good at it, don't give her any energy to work with or fodder for an argument. Just walk away. If she comes after you, either shut the door on her (which by the way, is another thing you should tell her - to stay the hell out of your room) or just continue going about your business and ignore her; pick up a book, go for a walk, make a sandwich - pretend she isn't there. Give NO response EXCEPT ignore her. She wants to act like a child then treat her like one. Kids get tired of not being heard and not giving her the satisfaction will eventually tire her out.

I'm telling you, it works, I've dealt with my share of children in grown up bodies - sometimes treating them like kids and lowering yourself just a little really does work.

I really hope things get better - you don't deserve to be made uncomfortable in your own home.

[Adora]

:hugz: People have been known to take jobs very far away from those that they do not want to spend time with. Hope the situation gets better quickly.