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RubyRose
May 3rd, 2008, 05:19 AM
Okay, Xander usually spends Thursday night Friday, over at my mother in law's house and occasionally the odd weekend. Which I don't have a problem with.

However, I never seem to get any of his clothes back that I send over with him, or for that matter, if we're over for dinner, the ones he's been wearing get thrown in the wash, and he's showered and changed ready for bed when we get home.

It's gotten to the point, that I now have 40% of his clothing here at home, and the rest at MIL's house.

I don't quite know how to bring it up with her, simply because she does buy clothes for him at times.

The main problem I have is, he's currently wearing size 3 and the majority of clothing I have is size 2, which at a pinch he can still fit into. Every time we go over there, I wind up loosing the bigger sized outfits.

SilverClaw
May 3rd, 2008, 05:27 AM
I use to have that problem with all three of my kids... I would simply ask my inlaws upfront that I need the clothes returned and explain why they need to be returned. Mine were pretty good about it. Now my in laws buy clothes for them to have at their place and before they come home they change into their home clothes... For the most part or I make the kids clothes that can be kept at their house.. Some times we still get stuff left there but not as much.


So ya as long as your not rude about it when talking to your inlaw, I do not think it will be a problem or wrong of you to bring it up.

RubyRose
May 3rd, 2008, 05:31 AM
Thanks. I actually not mind her having a few articles of clothing at her place, to be honest but the amount currently is rather large.

SilverClaw
May 3rd, 2008, 05:32 AM
Well then just mention that to her or desginate some clothes that can be kept there ... :)

RainInanna
May 3rd, 2008, 08:33 AM
Oh I think you should definitely be upfront about it and ask for some of them back. If it were me, I would have to. She probably hasn't realized just how much she has or thinks if you need them, you'd ask for them.

I know at least with my MIL that she would want me to be honest and forthright and would be more likely to get offended if I DIDN'T simply be honest.

RubyRose
May 3rd, 2008, 08:39 AM
Thanks.

Sun Sprite
May 3rd, 2008, 02:19 PM
Plan a day with her, bring a few of the ones too small, and say you want to go through and keep a few outfits at her hose, but need to keep most of what he wears at home, so he is ready for visits to her house. Two to three outfits should be plenty there in case of accidents.

Be sure you let her know you appreciate her washing them, you just need the pile back. It is possible she forgets everytime you are over there, and fully intends to give thm back. She doesn't want to leave them sitting out for him to knock into the floor.

RubyRose
May 3rd, 2008, 09:34 PM
It is possible, I suppose.

Lady Shalymar
May 3rd, 2008, 10:16 PM
Whenever I sent my daughter anywhere I'd pack enough clothes for the whole time she was there and completely expected to get them all back. If something was missing I would mentiont ot he person "Oh I noticed such and such article wasn't in the bag, is it still at your house?"

The only difference is when she went to her dad's. When she came to my house I'd take the clothes she was wearing off and put them aside in my room and change her into the clothes I had for her. Before going back to her dad's I'd change her back into the clothes he sent her in. He did the same thing.

I'd say if your MIL wants to have clothes at her house that's alright, especially if they go over often but maybe a system like my ex and I used would work for you?

Kaylee
May 4th, 2008, 11:38 AM
When my friend's daughter visits she comes in an outfit from her mother's and when she goes home I send her in the outfit she came in last time because if she's only over for one night and I don't have time to get laundry done she'll end up going home in an outfit I bought and I never get them back. I don't know how many things she's taken home and never brought back but I don't have anything from her house here but I always send it home.

I'd just tell her that you didn't realize how many outfits had been left at her house and that you really need some back because his clothes at home are getting low.

Lunacie
May 4th, 2008, 11:59 AM
My mom/gramma in law always sent all the clothes back home in the backpack, never had any problems. My grandkids dad takes the girls every weekend and tries to send all the clothes home with them again. Sometimes they are dirty and sometimes he has washed them. There haven't been very many times when I've needed to ask, "Did the girls leave their jackets (shoes, fav t-shirt or jeans) at your house?"

I never realized how lucky I've been.

On the other hand - he hates flip-flops and crocs and insists that the girls either wear tennis shoes or takes them along - and then they don't always remember to bring the other shoes home again. And he prefers for the girls to always wear jeans - he hates skorts and skirts and sweatpants. Sometimes I pack jeans, but some weeks the laundry didn't get done and I pack whatever is clean and he can just deal with it.

Lady Shalymar
May 4th, 2008, 01:18 PM
My theory with sending munchkin to her grandparent's house was always if they didn't like the clothes I bought for her and how I dressed her they were more than welcome to buy her other clothes and dress her like that at their house lol.

Amethyst Rose
May 4th, 2008, 02:46 PM
My kids are at my parents' house right now, and I just send all the clothes they'll need, and my mom sends them back. If something gets forgotten then it gets sent back with them the next time.

I would just ask for everything you need back.

Lyrien
May 4th, 2008, 04:18 PM
When I was a very young girl and still potty training I remember my mother taking me to daycare once when I wasn't wearing any panties. Apparently the babysitter had kept all of my training panties when I'd have accidents. When the babysitter was alarmed that I wasn't wearing any underwear, my mom just said "Well, if you'd give them back, she'd have arrived in them." She never kept them again.

Lunacie
May 4th, 2008, 05:23 PM
If the in-laws are keeping the extra clothes, then stop sending any extra clothes. Just send the kids in the clothes they're wearing and let the in-laws take care of all the laundry and send 'em back home in clean clothes. :hehehehe:

RubyRose
May 4th, 2008, 09:13 PM
If the in-laws are keeping the extra clothes, then stop sending any extra clothes. Just send the kids in the clothes they're wearing and let the in-laws take care of all the laundry and send 'em back home in clean clothes. :hehehehe:

Thanks. I think this is exactly what I'll have to do.

sarabethv
May 26th, 2008, 02:22 PM
When I was a very young girl and still potty training I remember my mother taking me to daycare once when I wasn't wearing any panties. Apparently the babysitter had kept all of my training panties when I'd have accidents. When the babysitter was alarmed that I wasn't wearing any underwear, my mom just said "Well, if you'd give them back, she'd have arrived in them." She never kept them again.

Good one.

When the granddaughters would visit me, I would send clothing back (including new stuff I had bought). Since they are part of an extended family they live with dad and visit mom, auntie, nana, and sometimes friends as well as me. Most times, I would never see the clothing I had bought again, or it would come back absolutely ruined. I started sending them back in the exact clothes they came in.