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Mithrea
May 5th, 2008, 06:48 PM
I have always craved a group experience and never found a positive one where I live. I've joined many eclectic groups that seem to work well with one another, but I just never feel like I fit in. Even when the group is completely accepting of my beliefs

Have any of you felt this to be true for you?

Tanya
May 5th, 2008, 06:54 PM
yep. which is why I don't belong to one
I think my expectations are probably too high.. I want the warm friendship and acceptance of a family.. ...

its not gonna happen I suppose.

Rowan Darkmoon
May 5th, 2008, 07:02 PM
yep. which is why I don't belong to one
I think my expectations are probably too high.. I want the warm friendship and acceptance of a family.. ...

its not gonna happen I suppose.

I agree, I think that that kind of dynamic is really hard to find and even harder to create. Especially when you live in an area with a limited pagan population and limited choices.

I was talking about this with a relative of mine later, but I feel like the older that I've gotten, the more difficult it's been to make and keep those types of relationships that are "warm friendships and the acceptance of a family." Don't know...it would be very nice though. :cutie:

Mithrea
May 5th, 2008, 07:17 PM
yep. which is why I don't belong to one
I think my expectations are probably too high.. I want the warm friendship and acceptance of a family.. ...

its not gonna happen I suppose.

I think maybe that's my problem. I have this idea of what I want and it's never what I get. I think I've been spoiled by reading about Dianic groups in other places. :) I've tried starting women's spiritual groups and meditation groups and they always turn into unproductive gossip-fests.

Tanya
May 5th, 2008, 08:04 PM
I believe these things have to form organically... and its true the older we get the harder it is to make those kind of friendships.

currently i'm in a coven of 2, and I don't know how we could ever come to love and trust a 3rd, 4th. etc as much as we do each other....

I keep hoping though....


lol


where do you live????8O

Mithrea
May 5th, 2008, 11:36 PM
I'm in West Virgina, USA. ;)

I recently met someone that I thought might be someone I could practice with . . . but strangely enough--it's a man. He's very pro-woman and pro-Goddess. In fact his practice is very Goddess oriented and he seems very interested in my practice--genuinely so, not in a condescending way.

I don't know. I guess I'll see how it goes. I just always feel like people aren't looking for the same things as I am.

EvieLee
May 5th, 2008, 11:48 PM
This has been my experience too. I feel like my expectations are too high, or maybe I have personal issues or something. I don't know. But ecclectic groups, although very accepting and understanding of my Dianic style practices, just don't feel right. Even a local group that was purely goddess oriented didn't sit right with me. Maybe there is too much ecclecticism within the Goddess paths themselves for the cohesiveness found in the older texts?

Philosophia
May 5th, 2008, 11:50 PM
I have always craved a group experience and never found a positive one where I live. I've joined many eclectic groups that seem to work well with one another, but I just never feel like I fit in. Even when the group is completely accepting of my beliefs

Have any of you felt this to be true for you?

Yep and, like Tanya stated, its probably because I have too higher standards as well.

RavenStars
May 6th, 2008, 02:00 AM
There apparently is a large number of Dianic or Goddess focused people in my area. I went to a ritual some of them put on and it was way, way too big for me. As in a medium sized hall ringed with wimmin. While the energy was good, I certainly did not fit in with so many. I seriously doubt I will ever worship in a coven of any sort. I'm pretty house bound (although you wouldn't know that today---errands!). I'm pretty much of a weirdo, too.

Mithrea
May 7th, 2008, 01:11 AM
This has been my experience too. I feel like my expectations are too high, or maybe I have personal issues or something. I don't know. But ecclectic groups, although very accepting and understanding of my Dianic style practices, just don't feel right. Even a local group that was purely goddess oriented didn't sit right with me. Maybe there is too much ecclecticism within the Goddess paths themselves for the cohesiveness found in the older texts?

I wonder if the thing about us that draws us to this path is the same thing that makes this true. What do you think?

RavenStars
May 7th, 2008, 01:49 AM
I've wondered about the number of solitaries I've read in MW, whether that isn't the case in general. Never thought to ask.

nebetmiw
June 5th, 2008, 06:33 PM
You know in my years as a Dianic I have worked with many groups Dianic and otherwise. It all comes down to two things for me. A group is just too impersonal and I am too set in my ways.

alwaysfallingup
June 11th, 2008, 08:24 PM
I guess I'm in the minority here, because I've had the amazing good fortune to work with not one, but two groups of women that have been a family to me and closer than anyone to me other than my husband. The second group was born from the first group when the first group separated because everyone was going in different directions in life.

A few things I've observed about these groups that made them work for me:

--A group sense of humor is absolutely a must. We have to be able to laugh when things fall apart or when silliness strikes.
--We have to be able to open up, to trust each other, and to know the importance of keeping confidences.
--More than six in a group seems to get too big for a close, intimate circle.
--Food will bring almost anyone together.:hehehehe:
--When looking for new members, have open events. That way, you can get to meet new folks several times and see how they work in the group dynamic before asking them to join.
--Contact outside the group needs to be maintained. I should know if Susie's mom is sick or if Debbie has custody hearings coming up and keep in contact about them. Our group work is stronger if we know what kind of common goals we have and what is going on in our lives. On the mundane side, this outside contact keeps down some of the gossip and chat time on ritual night.
--Have fun! We try and alternate very serious workings (such as dealing with abuse in childhood or past failures or Samhain rituals) with fun workings (such as beauty rituals or feasts or dance workshops).

I'm sure there's a ton more if anyone is interested. I guess I just wanted to post, though, to let you all know that good groups can happen, and do work!