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windblown
September 11th, 2008, 09:48 AM
That's where I am these days...

I have followed every path imaginable...only to find something not quite true about it...or to feel disconnected and hanging in limbo after an initial love connection...

There is nothing to hold onto...nothing makes sense...every spiritual path is just a culmination of other human being's thoughts...it comes from someone else's perception which is based on Their experience, mind, biological factors and flawed patterns...it's not MY experience...therefore I can't hold onto it as true for me.

I don't think famous sages are great anymore. Is an unseen wild flower deep in the forest any less than a planted tulip. My attachment to the tulip is real because i have experienced its beauty but does that make it greater than the wildflower? Of course not. Nothing is better than...different maybe.

I am in the process of erasing my beliefs...so I can have a blank slate free from the spaghetti menusha of thoughts created by others and myself so that I can live in the world without needing something to hold onto.

Those that claim to know, may know. But I don't know.

'Something' doesn't make sense...but 'nothing' does.

Shaman7
September 11th, 2008, 10:31 AM
The whole attachment thing: how you want to clean the slate and not be stuck within a man-made system... that sounds very Zen of you. Reading up on some Eastern religion/philosophy might help you be more accepting of 'nothing'. Who knows, maybe you'll find 'something' worthwhile...

Infinite Grey
September 11th, 2008, 10:31 AM
-cough- secular humanism -cough-

windblown
September 11th, 2008, 10:52 AM
Yep, there I go again...the whole 'nothingness' thing came from a 4 month stint I spent at the Isha Yoga Ashram in India with enlightened master Jaggi Vasudev...so that idea isn't my own...the guru told me about it.

Yes, Shaman...it is coming from eastern philosophy and though I do not follow it I have also studied Taoism and Bhuddism...but there again, I am trapped in a belief system (even when I think I'm breaking out.)

Perhaps it is impossible to undo myself. I feel hopeless. Maybe I'm depressed...but that's another belief.

Heeeeeeeelp...I think I'm going crazy.

Darkest Eve
September 11th, 2008, 02:17 PM
Honestly, this is the main reason I call myself 'eclectic'. I don't follow a system or set of rules that are already out there, not really.

None of the 'complete' paths make sense... they all seem to lead me right into a brick wall. But if I trip, and stumble, ramble and wander.... I seem to do just fine. :lol:

Sometimes that there is no right answer is the only answer you get.