Nervous

[Laoghaire]

I'm getting really nervous as the day passes by. I've got my very first ritual tonight. I'm yet initiatied in this coven, but I already feel a part of it. The members are amazing people, and they make me feel so very welcome.

But I'm nervous!!

I've got my robe, and I'm very proud of it. My gran helped me and she turned my fabric in something amazing. It's magic to see it happen.
But... I still haven't got a wand. I forget to watch the moon and I still haven't found a willow tree that I like. I hope the HPS isn't going to be upset... Urgh... I don't think I'll need it yet, because I'm not initiated and therefore not allowed to summon the Watchers. But I feel bad about it...

I just arranged a bottle of Schnaps for the Cake & Wine, because I know how much they like to drink :p. Maybe I'll take the marzipan potatoes too...

I'm singing, to try and forget my nerves. And in betwee, I try to memorize the names of the Watchers, the Chant and the text to welcome my stone.

It's amazing really, as if this was meant to be... I'm the tirthteenth witch in Coven Kallisto. Our stone circel has 13 stones, and mine is number eight. Oh, and because of my text (Water & Earth) I'm going to bring my stone a gift of water and crocheted circles in a square. Yes, another job I have to do :p.

I'm nervous! But so so excited!

[Darkest Eve]

:)

Good luck tonight. I think you'll enjoy yourself - participating in the first ritual on All Hallows is an awesome way to get started, and any HP/HPS worth their salt won't be upset that you don't have a wand....but will just be happy you are there to share in the festivities. ;)

The coven should encourage your growth and understand that you are human and have limitations. :)

So stop worrying and enjoy yourself!

[Lunacie]

Every group is just a bit different, neh? I encourage my students to begin calling the quarters as a way to get them used to the energies that are all around us, to get comfortable with being part of the ritual so that in time they will be able to prepare and lead a ritual themselves. We don't use wands to call the quarters. We keep it simple and call the elements themselves rather than Watchers or Archangels.

We had 13 members in our group for a while, and for doing ritual that's an awesome number, but for classes and meetings and pot luck dinners it's just too many, and the group tends to divide into smaller groups (like smokers and non smokers) and then you miss out on some of the discussions. We had 8 members for almost a year and that's a really good number to work with, in circle and out of circle. But one member died very suddenly last month, and a couple of members can't make it to our Samhain ritual tonight. There may be only four of us tonight, which is enough but not as good as 8 or 9. At least the weather isn't going to be freezing here.


Best wishes on having a wonderful experience at your first ritual tonight. :boing:

[~Belladonna~]

Sounds amazing!

Good luck tonight (not that you'll need it) ;)

[Phoenix]

This is the first ritual for our new group as well. We have all worked separately and in a larger, more public group together. I can understand the nerves. Try taking a long hot shower, and playing some relaxing music while you finish off your prep work and get dressed. That always helps me.

[Laoghaire]

I did the shower, though it doesn't please my skin. I made a small note with my texts, packed my stuff. All ready to go, apart from the tiny little square I really have to finish before I leave home. I've barely eaten something, I'm that nervous.

Thanks for all the kind words!

[Zephyrstorm]

Good luck! :) I'm sure its going to be a lovely evening for you.

[Ivy Artemisia]

I hope you have a great time tonight! Its always a little nerve wracking when working with a new group, but you'll forget your nervousness once the ritual begins. :)

[Laoghaire]

Just got back...

Amazing, but strange at the same time. We didn't celebrate Samhain tonight (Yes, we did), but the original idea was the initiation of our stone circle. Each of us had picked a stone, and tonight we welcomed them together in our circle. I was very strange to hear the words I've read a hundred times before. And it was quite hard to find 'my place' in the group really. There were two of us, not initiated people. But the HP and HPS wanted us to be a part of it, as it was such a special moment for the coven. Because the circle is for all of us.
I did not know the words of certain chants and it felt strange to dance around the circle to raise energy while we were laughing with the chant. And sometimes I noticed that my mind wandered off. But in the end, when we broke the circle, it did feel like coming down to earth. As if a curtain was lifted. We raised energy to and I was able to feel it. It healed my tummy!
I'm a tad bit sad that I did not feel the connection with the Goddess that well. You read all those amazing stories about it, but alas. It felt good nonetheless. Strange, but good. I guess I have to grow into it still.

[Ivy Artemisia]

Keep in mind that all rituals are different. And IME, you won't have an amazing connection with the Goddess or feel the awesome power of the raised energy every time. But when it happens, its just that... awesome. Also, keep in mind that your personal experiences with ritual will change the longer you work with that group. The group has a hive mind, and becoming energetically included in that doesn't happen super quick. It usually takes awhile, and you'll find your place. You probably already do this, but if you don't- journal about your experience. Youll be able to look back on this experience from a different perspective soon enough.