Do you worry?

[HetHert]

What is your feeling about the concept of worrying and it's functionality in life and living? What purpose does it serve you? Is it healthy?

I personally worry very little, or rather I don't worry for very long about any one thing. I do worry sometimes and get fussy over details but soon after the moment is gone so is the worrying, however, my mother worries A LOT! She is what some might call a professional or perpetual worrier.

I was just reading an article that posits that we are born and raised to be a worriers. I tend to agree on some levels, we learn a lot from watching and emulating our parents behaviors, mannerisms as well as emotional responses.. If I had taken any more cue from my mom I'd be a balled up mess. Luckily I chose not to take that aspect from her and followed more of my dads demeanor.

So tell me what *you* think or feel or both about worrying...

[LacyRoze]

I'm not much of a worrier. Things always seem to work out so what's the point in worrying myself to death? I know that one way or the other I will make it through whatever life throws at me.

My mother too is a perpetual worrier. I've watched her worry about things until she literally makes herself sick. I just can't understand doing that to yourself.

My hubby calls me the ultimate optimist. I don't think that's entirely true. I do believe life is too short and I'm not going to waste time worrying when I can be working to change things.

[Sionnach le Fey]

I tend to be a little too laid back about everything to worry. No matter what happens to me, things could be a helluva lot worse. Worrying only causes unneccessary stress.

Although, saying that, if men are involved, it's a whole different story...

[Terra Mater]

Once upon a time, the following poem was a popular wall hanging in many homes. Though most of us do not believe in Heaven or Hell, I think it still illustrates the folly of worrying quite effectively.


There are only two things to worry about
Either you are well or you are sick.
If you are well,then there's nothing
to worrry about.
But if you are sick, there are
two things to worry about.
Either you will get well or
you will die.
If you get well, there's nothing
to worry about.
If you die there are two things
to worry about.
Either you will go to heaven
or Hell.
If you got to Heaven there's nothing
to worry about.
If you go to Hell, You'll be so
damn busy shaking hands with friends, you won't
have time to worry.
So, why worry?

[WokeUpDead]

If we don't worry about anything then we'll get eaten by the saber toothed tigers because we're careless. If we worry too much we never leave our caves because we're too afraid of the saber toothed tigers and we'll starve to death.

[Glowingsun]

Reminds me of my fav. movie quote from National Lampoons Van Wilder: "Stress is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere."

There is truth in that.

I worry alot about things, but I take things into action to try to prevent it or lessen the impact on things that I'm worried about. Like if I'm worried about how much groceries I can afford after paying bills and rent, then I make up a budget and grocery list. Then I adjust the budget. Perhaps only a pay a part of something that can wait. Or delete unessential things off of my grocery list. If I fear I may have a financial set back, I call my folks and my husband does the same.

[Childof_theMorrigan]

ugh. i used to worry a LOT. i would worry myself physically sick. i had the worst anxiety and cortisol? coursing through my body almost constantly. my doctor basically told me i had to knock it off.

now i think i worry a healthy amount. if something comes up, i acknowledge it and give a small amount of time to it.. and then i release it to the universe. i try not to keep obsessing over something i can't control or am waiting on an answer for. i revisit the issue when circumstances change and i have something i can "fix".

the only time that this doesn't work is if I'm in a depressive crash. then, of course, there are other issues at hand making it more difficult to think rationally about the situation.

[Cunae]

I don't worry. I know God has my life in His control and I pray for acceptance of whatever He knows is best for me. I have a lot of serenity that way! I still pray for things sometimes, but mostly for acceptance of what's going to happen.

[Astara Seague]

I used to..alot..especilly when my kids were growing up..or when my so called boyfriends were acting like idiots
but I have learned that it never really accomplishs anything..
and yes it does make a person physically ill..Ive been there and also seen others,

I dont worry hardly ever any more I cant say never..things slip into my head sometimes..but I have learned very easy ways to help them out of my head so...

put it this way I try really hard not to worry it is not good for the worrier or the one being worried about.

[Dio]

I used to be a perpetual worrier. Got it from my mom. I remember having feelings of complete incapacitating worry over people I cared about.

I somehow learned the fine art of apathy which helped me temper those worrisome thoughts. I needed to stop caring so much because it would probably kill me if I didn't. I don't think that apathy is necessarily a good thing, but it sure helped me with the worrying. I still care deeply for my loved ones, but I know I can't control what they're going through. I can't MAKE people stay in my life, and I can't MAKE people like me, and I can't MAKE people stay alive. Things happen as they happen.

Now I take things as they come, and can accept any situation as it comes my way. I've accepted that I can't control everyone and every situation. The worry only comes in as fleeting thoughts that I can easily control. It's nice not feeling controlled by that awful behavior. I hate to say it's awful, but that's how it feels.

Things will probably change when my son becomes a teenager, but that's a long ways away. :)

[Faelon_Moon_Hawk]

What is your feeling about the concept of worrying and it's functionality in life and living? What purpose does it serve you? Is it healthy?

I personally worry very little, or rather I don't worry for very long about any one thing. I do worry sometimes and get fussy over details but soon after the moment is gone so is the worrying, however, my mother worries A LOT! She is what some might call a professional or perpetual worrier.

I was just reading an article that posits that we are born and raised to be a worriers. I tend to agree on some levels, we learn a lot from watching and emulating our parents behaviors, mannerisms as well as emotional responses.. If I had taken any more cue from my mom I'd be a balled up mess. Luckily I chose not to take that aspect from her and followed more of my dads demeanor.

So tell me what *you* think or feel or both about worrying...


I worry, and I can worry alot. But I know this and I know it won't help anything, so I try to avoid things that make me worry. I've also learned that you can't let worry get to you. For example, I'm planning a wedding, it will be in a few months. My fiancee is a Marine and there's no garuntee he will get leave then, no garuntee the wedding will happen then. I have two choices, worry about it & freak out driving myself insane, or realize that all the worry in the world won't change anything and it will either go as planned or we'll have to change and adapt. I chose to go with the latter.

[Morgane]

What is your feeling about the concept of worrying and it's functionality in life and living? What purpose does it serve you? Is it healthy?

I was just reading an article that posits that we are born and raised to be a worriers.

So tell me what *you* think or feel or both about worrying...


I am the first female in our family to NOT wind up on anti-anxiety meds from worrying too much!

It's not that I don't worry...I do...Constantly...

I just refuse to muffle it with meds.

Is it healthy? No, it's not. I've had alot of sleepless nights due to my excessive worrying nature. But the worry itself does force me to act, and I don't see that as being a bad thing. It's when we worry constantly and do nothing to change the outcome that it reaches an unhealthy level.

I do try to minimize the things I worry about...I worry about my children (both grown), my husband, and money, of course...But that's about it. I don't let it go any further than that, because if I did, I would make my life pretty miserable.

I do believe that my mother and grandmother's constant worrying affected me, but I think it drove me insane enough to force me to keep it to a "dull roar" inside my head!

[SphinYote]

I worry a lot...to the point where it's counter-productive. Sometimes extremely so.

Like a lot of people, I take it too far.

But I think that it has a definite purpose.

People mull things over in their minds in order to learn from them. We replay scenes mentally, and do things differently in our imagined worlds.

Reasons

How could I have done this better?
And thus we plan for future similar events, and learn.

Why did this person react the way they did? What is going on in their life to cause them to act this way (and we proceed to imagine the possibilities).
And thus we learn about human nature.

Am I doing my job badly? Could I do it better?
And we plan for more efficient ways of doing things, or are alert to the fact that we might be able to achieve more.

Could I be ill?
We do research and/or go to a doctor.

All of these types of questions, and the feeling of concern that accompanies them, help us to adapt to life, learn, make changes.

The problem comes when we can't stop.

Metaphor:
The problem comes when we revisit those same paths too often, and have wrung out any advantage we can, but still revisit them because they are familiar. And because we might forget there are other paths of thought (these other paths fade away and become overgrown and hard to pass through when we spend all our time wearing down the worry-paths).

After being anxious and depressed for a while, I'm revisiting other trails, but it takes a while to clear them, it takes work because I've left the positive trails untended for too long.

Whereas the worry-paths are clear to the point of erosion, and sometimes wash out from under me, leaving me ungrounded and covered in worry-dirt....

Yote

[Morgane]

Excellent post, SphinYote...

And now I worry because I worry too much!:smileroll

[Skye]

I tend to be an optimist, in my world, the glass is always half-full. To me it is useless to worry about something, it is more useful to think and take action if you can. If there is nothing you can do or if what you are worrying about is beyond your control, then what is the point?

[WitchJezebel]

now i think i worry a healthy amount. if something comes up, i acknowledge it and give a small amount of time to it.. and then i release it to the universe. i try not to keep obsessing over something i can't control or am waiting on an answer for. i revisit the issue when circumstances change and i have something i can "fix".

This about sums it up for me but I don't think I was ever really a worrier, but more of a 'stress'er. In my 20's everything stressed me out. Like I had this horrible fear of always being in trouble for something. I was a nervous Nelly over everything and it always felt like I was walking on eggshells. The only people that didn't make me feel that way were my best friends but my family always had me all twitchy (I come from an abusive family) to the point that I would get physically sick. When I'd go home from CA to NY for the holidays, about 3 days prior I'd have an upset stomach and couldn't sleep. That would last until I went back to CA. To this day, when I visit family (who now live in IL) I can only stay up to 5 days; anything more than that takes a toll on me.

Now, well over a decade later, I don't let anyone stress me out that much. I learned the tools to have a more settled and well rounded life and when the family starts up I cut it short. Or maybe I just don't give a shit about most people anymore. Yeah... therapy works wonders :uhhuhuh:

[Meadhbh]

I try not to worry all that much. I agree things normally work out in the end and all we do is add stress to our lives. There is only so much that worry can get done. Either do something about it or let it go and try not to dwell on it.

[HetHert]

I love all the responses. Thought provoking and insightful. Sphin has brought up many of the same worries my mom would get into.

Do you think that the path of witch, pagan, metaphysic, occult has helped you with worries?

For me it has. I've learned to refocus that energy into a different manner. For instance rather than worry I will do a small rit or spellwork or commune with some aspect of nature and meditate. All these little things that divert my attention away from the cycle of worry and put my mind and energy into a more productive outlet.

Anyone care to share any worry spells, meditations, or methods they employee.

Oooh has anyone ever used worry dolls? I remember when I was little I and lived in San Antonio that I received some of them from a neighbor.
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d6/HetHert1129/worrydolls.jpg

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Worry_doll

I've also employeed worry stones, those stones with a smooth divet that you can rub your thumb into. I used to carry one in my pocket or purse sometimes.

[*oonagh*]

i can get down sometimes, but i don't often worry. things happen just as they should. we don't have to like it all the time, but, in the end, things work out.

[Morgaine_cla]

Worry seems to me to be mostly about fear of not having control of one's own life and, by extension, one's own life experiences. Mainly, it stems from fear -- mostly from fear of the power within us, but also from fear of loss or of being controlled by someone or something outside the Self. Avalonian spirituality has taught me to face my fears (which doesn't mean I stop feeling them, but that they do not rule my life), which has dramatically lessened my anxiety/worry about things.

Interesting question! Thanks for posting it.

[David19]

I sometimes worry, sometimes, it's gets out of hand, like I lose perspective, but, soon get it back, it's annoying, but, to be fair, if we didn't worry, we, probably, wouldn't be human, it helps to keep us alive and on our toes, IMO, anyway.

[Falling Star]

my guides have always told me, that worry is a sign of responsibility,....and i have had a lot of that!
Worry is a negative energy, and very draining,....so nowadays whenever possible, i try to transcend it!
(not always easy!) haha:boing::boing:

[Darth Brooks]

To worry is inevitable for me.

[ainecrea]

Great post! I am a "calm worrier". People have told me in the past they just want to be near me because I send out such calmness, however if they were inside my head it's quite opposite. I am worried about something constantly that I have stomach problems because of it. I do however, refuse to be medicated anymore and just meditate and pray more about things.

[Rudas Starblaze]

i dont worry about hardly anything.
but the few things i do worry about, i worry about alot.