drowning in tears

[FaeRain]

Goddess, please make them stop. I go to sleep crying, I wake up crying, I cry while driving, I cry at work, I go home and cry when no one is around.

Last week at ritual I was told by the channeler that I've already left but that he won't let me go anytime soon. What lesson am I supposed to learn? If I'm being punished for something I've done, I'm so truly sorry. I was also told that I need to work on my foundations and I'm still missing pieces of me. When will I be able to move in? All i do is foundation work...or that's how it feels.
I was told that she + I would have years of bliss together....but I dont see how I'm supposed to overcome so many obstacles to be with her. Being married would be enough, but the fact that she's on the other side of the world is a bit cruel, I think.

I've begged you to give me a glimpse of what I'm supposed to do. I'm listening, please help me.

[Flaire-FireStar]

Mother,

Please give FaeRain strength to get through this difficult time. So mote it be :heartthro

((((((FaeRain)))))

[FaeRain]

...thank you for the gifts of free tickets over the past week....the renaissance faire and 2 hockey games! That made being broke a little more entertaining...and I really shouldn't eat at those events anyway, so having only parking money kept me from being contaminated!!

I think I cried/slept a lot of negativity out today.

Thank you.