How many of you are "out of the closet"

[wiccamoon]

I am asking this because I dont hide the fact of what I am - but I dont shout it from the rooftops either

However some small minded bigots in my local community have taken it upon themselves to try and make life extremely unpleasant because I am a witch and they dont agree with my way of life

I have had the social services banging on my door accusing me of not bringing up my children properly because of my beliefs after complaints from these people - I have eggs thrown at the house - and I am supposed to be the undesirable!!!!!!

So I was wondering do any of you have similar problems - and if so how do you deal with them?

Nat xx

[Radocs]

I don't tell anyone unless they ask, and people very rarely actually ask... so it's never been a problem.

[shnen]

I am doing the hokey pokey.. depending on the person, and sometimes getting the door slammed in my face! ;)

nonetheless, I love being what I am, it is me.

[Flar's Freyja]

While I don't go around telling people unless they ask, I'm a lot more out than I was in the beginning, when I was very paranoid. I live in a small town in the bible belt. I wear my jewelry and it actually attracts very little attention.

I had a lot of fun on Halloween when I dressed as a witch at my restaurant job. Customers were joking about it being the only day that I could be myself and I had fun responding "Little do you know.........." :T

[Flar's Freyja]

Originally posted by wiccamoon
I am asking this because I dont hide the fact of what I am - but I dont shout it from the rooftops either

However some small minded bigots in my local community have taken it upon themselves to try and make life extremely unpleasant because I am a witch and they dont agree with my way of life

I have had the social services banging on my door accusing me of not bringing up my children properly because of my beliefs after complaints from these people - I have eggs thrown at the house - and I am supposed to be the undesirable!!!!!!

So I was wondering do any of you have similar problems - and if so how do you deal with them?

Nat xx

Wait a second, I didn't realize the problems you are having until after I hit Reply.........

The best way to handle this is to present yourself as being as normal (according to social norms) as possible. Don't overdo it with the costumery and jewelry, do your rituals inside, and show that you're just a mom like any other, sending your kids to school, taking them to story hour, etc. The most positive image that we can present is one showing that we are not all that different from anyone else.

If it's that bad, you might want to think about moving to get a fresh start. And throwing eggs is vandalism! Make a police report.

[Trinity Faith]

I'm sorry you're having to deal with all that. :(
I myself have been out of the broom closet for many years. First to family and then to friends. I was fortunate enough to live in a big city at the time so I was the least of people's worries. I have had bad situations in smaller towns we have lived in and have had an instance where my husband lost a job because of MY beliefs. Unfortunately we didn't learn of WHY until late last year.. and he lost the job 2 years ago. Sad because he isn't even religious and because of my personal beliefs (which I didn't shout from the rooftops, the woman saw one of my books in my own home..) he lost his job.
Anyway, I refuse to hide what I believe. But like you, i'd have a hard time dealing with my home being egged or threats of any kind. I feel terrible for you. :(

[wiccamoon]

lol I know what you mean with the celebrating halloween!

It isnt celebrated quite as much over here in Britain - but they do seem to be catching up albeit very slowly.

I am sooooo annoyed with with these dimwits - hubby tells me not to let them wind me up - he says just imagine how they would be if they could see us sitting here of an evening making up the wands and gemstone runes - they would all be having a field day.

You dont see me out their telling them what religion they should be following though - bunch of hypocrites!

Nat xxx

[wiccamoon]

I'm as normal as I can be lol - the only jewellery I wear is one small ring and a pendant - dress like anyone else - all my rituals are practiced indoors at home unless I want to draw down the moon - and then it is in my back garden in the early hours of the morning - and unless they are twitching the curtains wouldnt see me anyway.

Possibly it has been noticed that I do actually make a living from the craft - and as I work from home there are a few cusomers coming and going - but 90% of it is all done online and I definately dont broadcast it.

I wont hide and I wont move - this has been my home for 14 years now and their ignorance wont put me off.

Still irks me that in this day and age there can be such petty people around

I guess that their lives are so boring and insignificant that poking their beaks into mine gives them a boost!

[Emaleth]

I also don't tell people unless they ask and where I live they don't ask. They just assume that I'm a Catholic like everyone else.

The only people who know are my sister and two of my friends, who's been very tolerant and supportive.

I admire you, Wiccamoon, for you courage and determination. Just live they way you want to and maybe in time the foolish people will see that just because you follow a different religion doesn't make you a bad person.

Blessed Be

[Old Witch]

I don't hide it......I wear pentacle earrings every day and most of the time my pentacle necklace.......people who matter to me know...and no one else matters.........

[Storm]

This is why I don't socialize.I got my family, a few friends and to hellit with everyone else. One of my buddies calls me The Shamaness in affectionade but if he only knew!!!

[Earth Walker]

I wear my pentacle earrings and necklace, and medicine bag.

I ignore verbal rhetorical tirades, but if they insist on becoming
physical, then I kick ass.

[MammaStar]

I wear my pentacle necklace every day. In the beginning I would make sure I had it hidden here at work. Now, I don't care. It's been nearly a year since I started wearing it all the time. No one asks, and I don't tell. Every so often, someone says "oh, you're wiccan" and I just say "well, yes, Pagan actually" and that's about the extent of the conversation.

I would definitely file a police report for harrassment. That kind of treatment should not be tolerated.

[Storm]

my husband got shoved for wearing an opposing football teams jersey this weekend.
So yeah. Petty people everywhere.

[Flar's Freyja]

Originally posted by wiccamoon
I'm as normal as I can be lol - the only jewellery I wear is one small ring and a pendant - dress like anyone else - all my rituals are practiced indoors at home unless I want to draw down the moon - and then it is in my back garden in the early hours of the morning - and unless they are twitching the curtains wouldnt see me anyway.

Possibly it has been noticed that I do actually make a living from the craft - and as I work from home there are a few cusomers coming and going - but 90% of it is all done online and I definately dont broadcast it.

I wont hide and I wont move - this has been my home for 14 years now and their ignorance wont put me off.

Still irks me that in this day and age there can be such petty people around

I guess that their lives are so boring and insignificant that poking their beaks into mine gives them a boost!

You got it there. I'm envious that you've been able to work from home. I would like to do professional readings and a friend of mine has shop here in town. When she mentioned it to a customer, the merchant across the street was over there lickety-split with a Save Your Soul pamphlet.

[Demeter]

My DH and I are out ... he has a Ganesha statue with incense at his desk at work; I wear my pentacle ring constantly and often a necklace; we have Wiccan bumper stickers on our car. We occasionally get questions when we're at restaurants or some such, usually from waitresses who want to know all about Wicca in five minutes and think it's really cool. Worst we've had happen so far is someone left a Chick pamphlet on our car ...

[AmbivalentMirage]

Well, since I'm a qabbalist (not fitting into the "pagan", "wiccan", or "witch" labels), I've had some different experiences. Since my family is one only a few Jewish families in my community, I am used to some persecution and weird looks. However, being a qabbalist brings up a whole new set of interactions. Christians and others are happy to accept you as a Jew (except the Neonazis down the street), but once you start adding the metaphysical and mystical into your beliefs, they freak out. I mentioned reincarnation and transmigration at my school (a private Christian school, since my mom dislikes the public schools and I hate homeschooling) and a bunch of kids nearly went bezerk. Just today I said "Divine Mother Shekhinah", and someone accused me of idolitry.

As much confusion, misconception, prejudice, and persecution as I tend to face, I would not change what I believe for anything. =) have heard the Christian dogma, the Orthodox Jewish dogma, and everything else around...and qabbalah is the only thing that seems to soothe my soul and make me feel truly close to G-d. So, yeah, I face some problems (even the occasional condemnation by my mother who is afraid I might go to hell for praciticing qabbalah), but I think that it's the price we pay for our freedom to worship outisde of the box. :)

[Dravius]

Although I'm not entirely out of the closet myself (right now, only my mom, and maybe three of my friends know), my neighbors(who are also my only Wiccan friends in RL) have gone through much of the same problems you are having. They have even had Social Services called on them! I guess it is to be expected considering we live in the heart of the "bible belt", but it still makes my blood run cold to see it :(. I hope things work out for you.

[Leviyah]

I'm pretty much like you, I don't hide it but I don't wear a neon sign :lol:

[Ryhla]

I myself in many ways have been hiding in the broom closet. Not with my family, but with my room mates...mostly with the other female who lives here. She is like a 2nd mother to me and a strong church attendee. What is harder yet, is I'm about the only one she can honestly come to with problems and get things off her chest. At this point in our relationship, telling her would devistate her. I'm hoping one day I can come out, but with everything going on in her life right now would just add to the stress. Another reason I don't say anything to her is that it just may end up getting me kicked out of the house, but I can't be sure on that one. It's more of fear of the possiblilty of it happening. As far as following my path, it hasn't stopped me. I do it in private either going for walks or in my bedroom. I do it this way more out of respect for her than in fear of the repercussions of what might happen.

As for my family, I really haven't told them since I live in another state than them, and for something like this I want to be face to face to tell them. For the most part, they wouldn't have too much of a problem with it...mostly because of my personality. I'm too stubborn and they know it...it's that irish in me. Not to mention I have always been a bit of an eccentric and this really wouldn't surprise them. Of couse a few of them would probably think "It's just a phase...she'll will grow out of it." The people in my family who would be the most vocal and cause problems are the ones who I never see anyway and I really don't do much with them for starters...so it's not a problem there as well.

As for who does know about my path is my younger older brother (I have 2 much younger brothers than I), my sister, and a few friends. In fact, my best freind is the one who helped bring out something in me that has always been there. Aside from that, I have met people in general with indifference on the matter.

Sure there are a few in this little town who would try to rescue me from this "EVIL" path ;). But for those, I worry not since I don't know any of them here. In reality, this town is a bit liberal for religeon. The diverity of religeon here is fantasic. It's the outsiders, like me, who don't belong to any of the old families that is the problem. I may be a pagan, no problem, but I'm not a _________ family member. So with that matter, I do get a cold welcome in a few places here.

[Gryphlette]

I've been "out of the closet" for about a year now. but seeing as all of my family is christian they harp on me all of the time. It gets annoying that I can't do any of my rituals. Shoot I can't even have an alter in my room. But Seeing as I go to a more or less christian bording school I can't realy do much there either. But I don't hide whta I am. I have found friends I can trust and they know what I am shoot most of the school knows and I get very little mouth about iot. kids here are becoming rather open minded nowadays. Shoot we have gays and lesbians in my school and their not even harassed. So I think I'm in an ok sittuation. Exceot that I have to study in secret. And one rule about myu sbhool is that while I can study I can't practise. Now how skrewed up is that?

[materra]

It really depends on where you are in our world if you are "out" or not. I was fully out when living in a northern state of the US and had a few small problems, but was well accepted overall. I now live in the Southwest and am very careful to be in the closet. Only a few folks here know... and that was by accident really.

I would inform the local police of the problem Wiccamoon. Living in your own home for 14 yrs and shows you are a steady member of the community. The most likely the police will find the kids who are doing this... why do I think it is kids? Cause in my experience adults are more nasty. Just my 2 cents.... good luck.

[Pan]

While I, too, don't shout it out from atop Wal Mart.. I do wear a pentacle around my neck almost every day. I don't hide what I am.. on purpose, anyway.. but then I don't scream it into a loudspeaker, either.

One reason is my family. If the community doesn't like it.. they may complain so much to them.. or try to hurt them.. or vandalise their property.. I just don't want that to happen.

Another reason is there's just no need for it. To openly dictate what I am to a town that openly does not like it is to invite ridicule, spite, anger, and possibly the inability to get a job.

I would love to do tarot readings for the community.. but I just feel horrid about taking, what, $35 the going rate now for "professional" tarot readers? I put that in quotes to refer to those around me.. not to anyone here. ;) So take no offense as it was not intended. I just can't take money for my readings. I can't bring myself to do it. I've tried!

So.. there's me. I've one foot in the closet to chuck myself back in when need be.

[Valnorran]

I'm sort of out in a roundabout way. I had a cousin who got into Wicca after I did. The difference was I told no one. She decided to confide in the absolute worst person available, an uncle of ours who is a former Presbyterian minister. He got himself defrocked by having a fling with a woman he was supposed to be counseling. To top it off, he was married at the time. Well, he went ballistic when she told him. I came out of the shadows long enough to calm the fears of my cousin's parents and my mother. I don't think my cousin is into it anymore. I haven't said a word to my brother or sister, but Mom might have made a few overtones. I'm not sure. My brother is in broadcasting, and his birthday is on April 1 (Dad went into work handing out cigars and nobody believed him!). So my brother likes to call Mom on his birthday and put her on the air while playing some sort of little joke. One year he called her up and confessed, "Mom, I'm a Druid." (He isn't, by the way. He's Episcopal.) Without missing a beat, Mom replied, "Well, your brother's been one for years!" I'm actually Wiccan, but she went along with Druid for the sake of the joke. So technically he's been told. It's just up to him if he believed it or not. When he came down here to help clean up after the hurricane my pentacle was in plain view. Normally I wear it under my shirt, but we were working in the heat and humidity so I wasn't wearing my shirt. Within minutes it will be saturated with sweat and just be more weight to bear. He said nothing. I don't know if he didn't notice or what. My wife and my mother know. My children know I don't go to church. My daughter has seen my books on magick. I've stayed in the broom closet largely for fear of the repercussions to my family, but as time goes on I grow more and more frustrated with having to walk on eggshells and slink in shadows for the grave crime of walking my own path. At some point I will probably be completely out of the closet. My own sense of pride and dignity will probably demand it.

[FlamedLilly]

Well I've just started down my path so I don't know exactly what I'd classify myself as. So I don't know if I'm in the closet yet to be let out. Does that make sense? anyway, I was raised as a mormon, so pagan or mormon I still get prosecuted and I still get people telling me what I believe. I do however think that mormonism is the closest christian religion to paganism. There are many parallels, which make my studies so much easier to understand.

[Kilia]

Having to be in the closet is a shame, coming out of the closet is really scary to say the least, but having friends and family who are supportive sure helps.

I wear beaded necklaces that have hearts turned inward to form a 5 pointed star and have people looking at it, but not commenting as yet.
I was born and raised in the Roman Catholic church and then turned LDS when I was in my 30's.

Then in the last 2 1/2 years, I began reading books by Scott Cunningham trying to get back to my Hungarian ancestral roots which supports old world spirituality. I now find this more in keeping with my own feelings and thoughts.

Bright Blessings to all...

[Psyche Ague]

I'm so sorry about your problems. :( Best of luck...

As for being out of the closet, I definitely am. I'm asked more often than I've ever first told, due to the pentacle around my neck. I'm not ashamed of what I believe, just like any other faith. I actually made a new friend here at school because I commented on her pentacle earrings and she on my necklace. :D

[Gwion]

I don't think I was ever in the closet. I wear my pentagram out all the time.

[stormyray]

I am out except to my mother.... Long story she lives 2 states away and has only visited once in 7 years so all is well..

[Cajime]

I'm out of the clostet, but only to those close to me. I don't make it known to the world but I don't hide things from people. And thankfully so far no one has had a problem with it :)

[FaerySong]

I'm half out, but working my way to be fully out. I have some people ask about why I have a pentagram on my hand, and when I tell them about what it means, they normally just go "k" but some people have asked me what it is will ask me when I have more time to explain, and I just do what I can. My cousin's sister-in-law, ginger, is Wiccan but I've never talked to her, but most (or all) of my friends no I'm Wiccan, and my parents and brother do. my mom is the only one who has a problem with the idea that "I've turned my back on Christianity" and whatnot. but yeah she left ME to find HER god and I had to get my own self out of the depression and darkness I had steadily sunken into...so...whatever floats the boats.... :P

[Élistariel]

I'm pretty much in the closet. 2 people know. What happened was I went out on a limb and posted it in my deadjournal. My friend, S, read it, and then told me she was too. That was nice, we've been friends since 2nd grade, and we both became pagan, but didn't know that we both were until last year. Our friend, T, knows because we just flat out told her. She's cool about it. There is no way I could tell my family. My grandfather's side has people working at the Baptist church. Also one aunt who works there is a tad old fashioned. She thinks 'fart' is a curse word, and gasped when I said 'brain fart'. So, yeah, not telling them. I don't know if my grandmother knows or not. She got me this ha-youge book on astrology from goodwill. Also my bathroom is all stars and moons, not entirely pagan, but still. Also my book collection isn't a 100% dead give away, but it's not a Christian bookshelf either, despite my one God's Devotional book. That was a gift from the church. Yeah, I don't go anymore, unless it's a holiday, or if my grandparents want me to go. I always had the hardest time trying not to fall asleep during the sermon. As for school, I don't think anyone would care. Although, back home (I'm in college) I'd like to blurt it out, just to see people's reactions. But I wouldn't really do that.

[Jazzmine]

My husband knows and my mom. I think there is one person at work that knows. Other than that noone else knows. I have started putting on questions like I got this thing to fill out from the doctors office and it asked about religious belief. I put down Earth-based. Personally, I feel it is really no one else's business. People are too willing to belittle what they don't know and don't understand. I, too have the necklace and earrings, but am afraid to wear them out in public. Yes, afraid! I shouldn't be, but I can't help it. The people that know now don't harass me about it. My mom is actually reading books on shamanism. And my husband, well, as far as I'm concerned is a natural born Witch. He doesn't do any Esbats or Sabbats or anything like that, but there are other ways about him that just hits you like a ton of bricks. The different things he likes and such. Anyway, no need to keep blabbering on.:p

[Twilight Garden]

I'm out. Everyone I'm aquainted with either knows or assumes such. All of my real friends and family definitely know. I was much more "proud" about it when I first started on the path. I was very defensive and immature about it then. Not that I'm not proud now, I'm just more secure with myself and don't feel the need to educate every person on tolerance.

I also got bored with the questions and the looks from the pentagrams I always wore. I still wear them when I feel like it, maybe to a ritual or something. I rarely wear them anymore though. I just don't feel that they represent my religion well. The only jewelry that I wear everyday is a moonstone necklace and my wedding ring.

[Witchy Cowgirl]

I've opened the door but haven't taken a stepped out yet.
My in-laws know, as a matter of fact they helped me find my path.
My husband and kids know.
I've told one friend and was pleasantly surprised that she didn't flip out on me!
She actually found out cause she called telling me she had phoned a "physic". I mentioned that I read cards and the converstion went from there. I ended up doing a reading for her.
Then she wanted to send clients my way. I talked with Hubby about it and we decided that it was best that she didn't.
Cause my folks live here and I don't want to do anything that might hurt them....their feelings or otherwise.
Also, because I dont' want my boys to have to take $#!% at school over something I do.
I do wear a pentacle and it's usually under my shirt. But at the basketball game a few nights ago I noticed that it was out. I left it there.
On our trip to New Orleans Hubby told me he was glad to see me wearing it out. I told him that I was gonna start wearing it out and he said it was fine with him as long as I was prepared to explain.

[Gwion]

1. I'm Jewish
or
2. I listen to heavy metal.

[Ryhla]

Originally posted by Gwion
1. I'm Jewish
or
2. I listen to heavy metal. I don't have a pentacle I wear all the time, but I do have a triskele. I get asked what it means to me...and people are usually OK with it. Some even think it's cool.

[Marchosias]

I guess i dont have as much of a problem with that as you guys do...the last christian who saw my baphomet pendant about pissed himself, probably thinking i might try and curse him, or murder him in his sleep, or sacrifice his little brother...naturally, i didnt discourage that.*evil grin* Then again, my best friend is a Christian and he couldnt care less one way or another...so i guess i just scare off all the "undesireables" eheheheehehe :)

[Saphra]

I'm half in, half out. Most of my family doesn't know, I think only my aunt (Earthcat) and her husband, my brother and his wife, are the only one's in the family that do. All of my friends know, and most of them are Pagan or Wiccan anyhow.
I was at work today, and someone mentioned an ex-employee was dating someone who was "pretending to be" a witch, and everyone just laughed and made fun of her, so I now know that no one at work will be informed of my religion. It kind of bugged me that they were making fun of her, and slamming her like that, but if they found out that I was, I would probably be fired, they would find some excuse to do it. It kind of scared me too, I thought these people were open minded, but obviously I was wrong. I wanted to stand up for her, and I don't even know her, but what would they say about me, I guess I'm just a coward......

[WynterWynd]

My hubby is out of the closet to everyone!!! Full steam ahead and damn the torpedoes with that man!!!
Me, I guess you could say I am mostly out of the closet! The people I know now since we have moved, all know that we are pagan. We only a few times have had any "troube" from it. One perspective babysitter ran out of the house, abd she still talks s**t about us ever since, and that was 5 years agao!!! The little girl up the streets catholic mother wouldnt let her play with my youngest son, but now they are in the same room at school, so :razz: to her!!!! My hubby drives a big trick for a living and (if I ever find out who is doing this:mad: ) I guess who ever unloads/loads his truck for him thinks its funny to write in the dust on the truck rude anti-witch remarks. I think he should tell his boss, cuz he knows we are pagan and is cool with it. I think its the same goober that drew a crucfix over his window decal pentacle. About the only person that I could never tell is my best friend!! She would flat out go bug-nutty!!:ahhhh: I have tried to "feel" her out about the idea, and I just don't see it going over real well, except maybe over Niagra in a barrel!!:eek: So to her, I will probly always be in the closet!!





edited for dyslexic typing!!!!

[Akarhu Tesenisis]

i'm not really sure exactly how many people know. i mean, my family knows, all except my father's parents, and my friends know, but i'm not sure home many other people from my old school (old as in i graduated high school last year) knew i was wiccan. I never told any of the teachers, but i have a feeling that most of them know. I never actually told my parents, it sorta came out accidentally in an email. I can't remember quite how, but it was an email that did it. My parents are cool with it, which is nice, although most of the time my dad would rather not know. But that doesn't bother me. my best friend isn't so keen on it, being a christian and all, thinks i'm going against god and will go to hell, but i'm surprised at how much patience i have with her. besides, i'd rather keep an 11 year friendship than lose it over religion.

Blessed be all!

Akarhu Tesenisis

[Thistle]

I don't really know who knows. I don't hide it, but I'm not "in your face" either. Some of my extended family are born-again Christian, but not militantly so. They know I pray, I just don't tell 'em how! I don't wear a pentacle. Instead, I have a pendant of the cover of the Chalice Well at Glastonbury Abbey. No one has ever asked what it is, they just say it's pretty, and I say "thanks". :D