Empathy & Self harm (mature)

[Ladysadefairy]

I am curious

is there any other empath's who have in a way to deal with the daily bombing of other's emotions ,reverted to self harm to cope..?


in someway , i feel like i might be the only empath to have done this

[Lunacie]

I am curious

is there any other empath's who have in a way to deal with the daily bombing of other's emotions ,reverted to self harm to cope..?


in someway , i feel like i might be the only empath to have done this

I doubt if you're alone in this, but not everyone who is an empath has realized that it's a very real thing and isn't dealing with it very well. I've always tended to self-soothe with food and sleep (and tended to get depressed as well) rather than more intenses forms of self-harm.

[swapmeetmomma]

ditto lunacie

[Ladysadefairy]

thank you for those words..

i've gone 7 months so far..

but i am slowly learning how to hold up shields , such as picturing a orb or ball taking in those others emotions it works but i am not strong enough yet to hold it up long enough

[Zetta]

hang in there honey... it is not an easy path you walk. feeling the need for SI for any reason is a difficult thing to deal with alone.
*hugs*

also this (http://mysticwicks.com/showthread.php?t=91841&page=8) thread might be of some use to you. *hugs*

[Ladysadefairy]

thank you

atleast i dont feel alone ,now ..

[BearDancing]

at least at such a tender age you realise it is not all yours..........but others that you are picking up on
do you know how to ground yourself to Mother Earth..........that helps me
know that you are never alone my sweet:uhhuhuh:

[Lunacie]

thank you for those words..

i've gone 7 months so far..

but i am slowly learning how to hold up shields , such as picturing a orb or ball taking in those others emotions it works but i am not strong enough yet to hold it up long enough

A good shield can give you the space to learn how to be empathic without it making you crazy, but for the long haul, a shield isn't the best way to go in my opinion. Learning to recognize what you're feeling and decide what to do with that energy is better. You can ask for the energy to be transmuted into something more positive and returned to the sender. You can simply ground the energy and cleanse your aura and chakras so it doesn't stay stuck to you. You can let it flow around you. I'm sure there have been other suggestions in these threads. (especially in the big long thread)

But a shield is really best for psychic attacks, when the energy is being focused or directed at you specifically, instead of you just picking up that someone is having a really bad day and it actually has nothing to do with you in particular, you were just in the area or just talked to the person.

[Ladysadefairy]

at least at such a tender age you realise it is not all yours..........but others that you are picking up on
do you know how to ground yourself to Mother Earth..........that helps me
know that you are never alone my sweet:uhhuhuh:

thank you , and no i dont know how to ground yet


A good shield can give you the space to learn how to be empathic without it making you crazy, but for the long haul, a shield isn't the best way to go in my opinion. Learning to recognize what you're feeling and decide what to do with that energy is better. You can ask for the energy to be transmuted into something more positive and returned to the sender. You can simply ground the energy and cleanse your aura and chakras so it doesn't stay stuck to you. You can let it flow around you. I'm sure there have been other suggestions in these threads. (especially in the big long thread)

But a shield is really best for psychic attacks, when the energy is being focused or directed at you specifically, instead of you just picking up that someone is having a really bad day and it actually has nothing to do with you in particular, you were just in the area or just talked to the person.

I've yet to know how , as i am still learning ..about wicca and such

[Zetta]

well, grounding for some people is a very literal thing... when i first started, if i needed to ground i would literally sit on the ground beneath a tree and place my hands to the ground and feel all the pent up energy of me going into the ground to be transformed, and also visualize the calming green energy of the earth coming up into my body.


a simple shielding technique which i use is to sit comfortably and breath in deeply envisioning good things (love, peace, etc) coming in, and when i exhale i exhale negativity. after a few cleansing breaths, i envision a flow of white light coming into my body when i inhale and expanding from within to create a sheild around my body.


may not be of much help, but they work for me :P

[watersprite]

thank you for those words..

i've gone 7 months so far..

but i am slowly learning how to hold up shields , such as picturing a orb or ball taking in those others emotions it works but i am not strong enough yet to hold it up long enough
Shields are quite necessary. As empaths they must become a part of daily life. Cutting ties are also a very good idea, as this releases the empath from the assaults of the day.
Really, I keep my shields up unless I am trying to do a healing. To find the pain, mental, spiritual or physical. It is exhausting, and I only do it for those very dear to me.

[Lunacie]

Shields are quite necessary. As empaths they must become a part of daily life. Cutting ties are also a very good idea, as this releases the empath from the assaults of the day.
Really, I keep my shields up unless I am trying to do a healing. To find the pain, mental, spiritual or physical. It is exhausting, and I only do it for those very dear to me.

You might want to edit that to read . . .


Shields are quite necessary to me. As an empath they have become a part of my daily life. Cutting ties are also a very good idea, as this releases the empath from the assaults of the day.
Really, I keep my shields up unless I am trying to do a healing. To find the pain, mental, spiritual or physical. It is exhausting, and I only do it for those very dear to me.

In your opinion shields are necessary. As I posted earlier, they may not be. There may be other ways of dealing with the random energies that get stuck to us when we're around other people. Unless those energies are being deliberately directed at you it's possible to simply let them slip past and ground anything that does get stuck to us, or to change them into something positive and return them to the person they came from (a win/win as both end up feeling better).

Cutting ties is an excellent idea, especially when we have people in our lives who drain us of energy or continue to bombard us with negative energy just because they are so unhappy themselves.

[vortigous]

i know this feeling well...just a heads up...you aint alone.

[Ladysadefairy]

i know this feeling well...just a heads up...you aint alone.

thank you ..:hugz:

[Labrynth]

Hi Ladysadefairy,

I know that at first it can be hard to start routines and to remember to keep re-inforcing shields etc. It has taken me personally a fair while and some serious bouts of depression before i was able to deal with it comfortably and even i screw up and forget to shield sometimes.
The best technique i have found is cleansing my chakras starting from the base upwards, visuallising them being burned by my internal divine flame and then water poured over them making them clean and pure.
After this i visualise white light pouring down from heavenward straight through me through to the earths core, then coming back up as a maroon colored energy that wraps around me and upwards. This grounds me after clearing. After this i visualise a white bubble of energy that orginates fom my solar plexus and completely surrounds me, if i feel i need a little extra ill do this 2 or 3 times more.

As has been mentioned before chord cutting can be extremely helpful as well, i work with Archangel Michael to cut the cords with his sword during my chakra clearing, but everyone has their own ways and methods. There are also alot of cds that can help with shielding and cleansing, New Age though they may be, but i have found them extremely helpful to deal with the Psychic overload i can get, especially working in retail.

Hope this helps
Brightest Blessings

[Ladysadefairy]

i live off music , it tends to block out the emotions..

and thats a good tip , thank you Labrynth

[zombi]

I am curious

is there any other empath's who have in a way to deal with the daily bombing of other's emotions ,reverted to self harm to cope..?

in someway , i feel like i might be the only empath to have done this
You are not alone. Though there were other reasons involved in my self injury addiction, empathy definitely played a part.

(:

[WillowMoon86]

is there any other empath's who have in a way to deal with the daily bombing of other's emotions ,reverted to self harm to cope..?yes... me

[Ladysadefairy]

I am glad i am not alone..with this..

[AthenaCrowns]

I am curious

is there any other empath's who have in a way to deal with the daily bombing of other's emotions ,reverted to self harm to cope..?


in someway , i feel like i might be the only empath to have done this

You're far from alone. :) I didn't realize I was an empath (or have any idea what an empath was, for that matter) until very recently. Before finding a new spiritual path, before I truly healed... Until then, I cut myself nearly everyday with a pair of bathroom scissors.
so.....:hugz:

[Lunacie]

You're far from alone. :) I didn't realize I was an empath (or have any idea what an empath was, for that matter) until very recently. Before finding a new spiritual path, before I truly healed... Until then, I cut myself nearly everyday with a pair of bathroom scissors.
so.....:hugz:

Hello AthenaCrowns, welcome to the Bunker. :wave: And welcome to MW.

[mynumerologist]

I do know what it's like to feel the emotions of others, and how it can be very difficult to deal with being swamped in emotions that bring you down.

I have no experience of cutting myself, so I can't speak to that, which is why I took the time to read this thread: to see what I could learn and understand about the matter.

This may both sound and be totally naive on my part, but for someone who is deeply aware of the sufferings of others, does it bring any relief to try to make the world a better place in which to live? To do your best and let someone else worry about the rest.

So the idea is instead of being deeply aware of sufferings and doing the self harm thing, to instead actively channel that energy by trying to make the world a better place in which to live in your own way.

Many practical suggestions have already been offered in this thread, and as a non-experiencer, I was wondering if my suggestion is naive or possibly practical?

wishing everyone the best,

ed

:)

[Ladysadefairy]

its not stupid or naive.

we all may of thought of it ..but its not so easy..but it could be useful for a empath to take up schooling to be a psychologist

[mynumerologist]

its not stupid or naive.

we all may of thought of it ..but its not so easy..but it could be useful for a empath to take up schooling to be a psychologist

I appreciate your words.

:)

[Kaii]

I did. At the time i did not understand what my sudden feelings of pain, and longing and etc, took me.

I find i somehow locked away my own emotions at some point. I think that my body began to believe that outside emotions were my own. I'm a very go by feelings, and intuition, and gut feels and let my heart guide me, vs. letting my mind even think in most situations. And i find that i am ingornant to my surrounds, and reasons and what not, because of that.

At the time when I was self harming, I was completely drawn and pulled to someone at my school, and new kid, and She was the only think i could feel. About a month before she came to school, I suddenly had the thought to become punk/goth, and to suddenly make this unknown change. I don't understand to this day where the thoughts or motivation came from, that early. I believe it was a task from Mother, but that is it. So i suddenly had to make these changes, and did. When she showed up, I spoke to her first. The minute i saw her, My heart pulled for her, my soul cried out to be near here, and i had this undeniable need to be close to her. So I moved my seat to sit beside her, confusing my best freind, and i struck up a conversation. Things progressed so quickly from there. The same day she told me about her cutting problem, about her past and she said she didn'y understand why she felt a pull with me. by monday we were a couple. Up until that time, I had only dated 3 guys. And had never done anything sexual. except a little experementation when i was drunk at a freinds house with anotherr girl. this was in Grade 9, and i graduated in 07'. Her and i were on and off for that hole year, and I picked up her emotions, i realize now. Thinking back, I really don't remember much from before i started to make that change and if i do, its foggy. Ever since, I have noticed that in a room, I will pick up your manerisms within 10 minutes. And if i hang with you for a while, I can finish your sentances and etc. Sometimes i feel like i was given a gift, and when i accepted it with kayla, I was reborn into who I am now. I used to feel so much hurt, and i couldn't understand why i felt it. I had a decently stable home, and I'm not the type of girl to feel self pity because I was like the wife my father never had. i had responsibilies, and i enjoy that. Now i notice, that when i'm with a freind, and she is lonely, then i yurn just as she does, or I can pick up my mothers feeling. I find i create bonds, and sometime I can feel when Kayla needs me, and Vice versa, Though it has faded over the years that we have spent apart, but when we are able to meet agian it's like we were never parted, and we connect again.

I am still working on meditation and have had a hard time building up my shields. but even now when i got though things myself, or like the depression that scared everyone who knew me, when my dad moved us in with his wreched person he calls a step-mother, I didn't revert back to self-harm.

That's just my story anyway. It could be someone around is has fallen into that pit of distruction, or you yourself have. Try rubber bands, snapp those against your wrists when you need to cut, and maybe try taking to someone even your God/Goddess. They help you alot when you need to vent.

[ancalemagill]

I am curious

is there any other empath's who have in a way to deal with the daily bombing of other's emotions ,reverted to self harm to cope..?


in someway , i feel like i might be the only empath to have done this

I am dealing with that right now. I cant block it all out and I cant get it out. It isn't emotions, its negative energy latching onto me like a sponge. This is new and I cant cope. But I am determined not to revert to self harm anymore. I have been self harm free for a few weeks now. One day at a time is my mantra these days. But I haven't attacked myself since I started trying not too, so I am doing good.

It was quite bad for a while I gave myself 2 black eyes and scratched up my forehead a few times. I was worried I would knock myself out. Or give myself brain damage.

But I feel I am on the mend. I only wish I could stop soaking up everyone's negativity. If anyone knows how please let me know. Ive tried shields they aren't working. I even had a friend help me put some up and even that didn't work.

my hart goes out to the op, and everyone else in this struggle.

[Dragonia]

Years ago, before I knew what these feelings were, I had a houseguest that I was helping (long story). Well this person who seemed so sweet online was actually a horrible person, the terrible feelings I picked up from her were like none I ever felt before, it made me so miserable to be around her.

I didn't self-harm like you are talking about but I did something alittle similar, I got my ears pierced like eight or nine times while she lived with me (for a total of ten piercings per ear, I already had one or two per ear). I didn't know why at the time but the pain of doing that made me feel better. Needless to say, I got rid of that houseguest as fast as I could (and taken out some of those earrings).

Nowadays, somehow I have learned to block out the negativity when I'm around others (unless I'm trying to analyze someone). In fact, alot of times I get a nice burst of good energy. I'm not sure how to explain how to do this, mostly I just keep concentrating on positive thoughts. :)

I know this post is old, so OP if you're still around I offer you a hug and hope you're doing good. :hugz:

[LadyCelt]

I get scared of taking things out on others, and sadly take things out on myself. I don't cut myself or do physical harm, but probably psychically harm myself. I also get sick when bad things happen.

[hypno_cossak]

Sometimes, when someone picks up on someones else's bug-a-boos, it can be shocking. Being a therapist out in the world, I have dealt with lots of conditions. Being more then just a little empathic, I pick up on my fair share of "stuff." Its a strange concept, and I think I am the only one who has ever really though of it this way; your body knows what it needs to be well. Just ask it. If the situation, that causes you to feel this way, is out of your control to change, you might want to seek someone who might be able to correct things for you. However, if its just picking up on negative stuff, you can purge it. Just get relaxed, close your eyes, take some deep breaths, and let your mind wounder. And count backwards from 5 to 1 all the while thinking, how good you feel. Then keep thinking, I dont want to own theses feelings. Then when your ready to you'll open your eyes on your own, and you'll have a better picture of what you need to do to help yourself. Give that try, works for me. :weirdsmil

[Cheshireheir]

I want you to know your not alone. I cut a lot when I was younger and trying to deal with all the emotions (or lack their of sometimes) It was the only thing that made it stop, Let me know that the feelings I was feeling were truly mine. By the time I was sent to a hospital, i was documented with over 70% of my body covered in cuts. I still have the urge to, almost every day, but its been over 2 years. If you ever need someone to talk to, I would be glad to :)

[Pyrohawk]

You are by far not the only one. I have spent years getting rid of this habit. It's hard. If you need to talk to someone shoot me a message.