PDA

View Full Version : Need help: Family curses?



Paulienm
October 28th, 2009, 07:21 PM
I was wondering, what are your thoughts on family curses? You think they exist and that they can be broken?
I'll tell you my thoughts that led to this.

I come from a family with divorced parents and four children. I have three older sisters and one older brother; me and my oldest sister differ ten years and two months.
We, as siblings, all share some of the same traits. And by triats I mean weak points, falter points, flaws. Most from which it seems we inherited them from our mother, some from my father.
These traits are above all:


fear of failure
insecurity and comprising that with an attitude of superiority towards each other, from like some sort of self-defense
tempers of anger and frustration that can randomly pop up
we all walk paths that get us absolutely nowhere and only bring us misery, and it seems nearly impossible to break away from this
we all feel abandoned, though our parents never really deserted us physically.. we just feel really alone and solitair most of the time
strangely enough we all ponder about the same things but some kind of hesitation prevents us from telling each other

Those are the ones I can think of clearly right now. Now, I know these things can be caused in early childhood, probably because we all could have had the same influences, we didn't. We all saw the world from different perspectives when we were kids, I had it the easiest because I'm the youngest and my oldest sister had the most to endure. But anyway, I know that we didn't just happen to become like this together, it's way too similar and coincidential. I can't put it into words better than that.

For the past year or two I've gone through some major changes and I noticed my family is changing too, along the same lines. Though some of us more effectively than the other. But you can imagine, having the same negative traits, it causing a lot of clash, miscommunications and misunderstanding. When I left school, I had a goal to proof to my family that we could do things differently, that we didn't have to be unhappy (since not any of us can find our place in common society fields) and that we could shape our own ways, our own future. I feel that now, that path has served its purpose and it's come to an end.
I've thought about this for months and now I'm almost definate: I think this is some sort of energy line that connects my family, like a kind of legacy. You could say that these traits literally 'run' in the family, but I feel like it's really on an energetic level, some sort of family curse.
If my current path has come to an end, the next one might be to try and break this curse, to dismantle this specific energy with energy. I was wondering if you guys had any thoughts on this, any advice on particular magic or energy means I could use for this. I really want to try and heal the legacy of my family.

David19
October 28th, 2009, 09:06 PM
I do think family curses can be real, but, IMO, I'm not sure if that's what you've got, it sounds like, maybe, you and your siblings have those similar, negative/weaker traits, 'cause, you were, likely, all brought up in the same environment, if your parents divorced, that can add to the problems (and, since I don't know you, I don't know why your parents got divorced, but, maybe, witnessing them argue had an negative effect too).

I'd suggest, maybe, therapy, to deal with those issues.

Tobias
October 28th, 2009, 09:40 PM
Paulienm,

I'm impressed that you have been able to identify this problem so well. I too have noticed the "curses" flowing through my family line, and have successfully broken a number of them. I wouldn't know how to break them off of other family members (without involving them in the procedure), but I have stopped them from affecting me and from passing on to my children.

Generational Curses are well known and often addressed by Christians in the Deliverance ministry. Which is where I first learned about them. It has been noted by many ministering in this field that certain negative traits pass down from parents to children, with no apparent reason except for spiritual. There seems to be a certain type of demonic spirit that hangs out in a family line, teaching the children to accept it's influence (and giving it permission to be there). This is just one of the many types of spirits we would pray against in Deliverance.

If you do a search on "generational curses" I'm sure you'll find all kinds of info; though I don't know how useful you'd find it to be. The only spiritual warfare I've done has been in a Christian setting, and I don't know how effective other methods are at dealing with this stuff. I've moved on to other things (besides being a warrior), so this isn't anything I've tried to adapt for use outside of Christianity.

I hope you find what you need though. :thumbsup:

Kalika
October 28th, 2009, 09:54 PM
I do think family curses can be real, but, IMO, I'm not sure if that's what you've got, it sounds like, maybe, you and your siblings have those similar, negative/weaker traits, 'cause, you were, likely, all brought up in the same environment, if your parents divorced, that can add to the problems (and, since I don't know you, I don't know why your parents got divorced, but, maybe, witnessing them argue had an negative effect too).

I'd suggest, maybe, therapy, to deal with those issues.

That was my thought as well. It doesn't seem like a curse that has been stuck with your family, but that it is rather a result of the environment and your upbringing. That is not to say anything against you or your parents - but siblings, even those who are vastly different, tend to grow up with some of the same things if they are brought up by the same parents... even if it is years apart.

It also sounds like it is more a negative outlook than a magic influence. You said that you set out to "prove to your family that you could be happy" - attitude has a big influence on your happiness. If you think bad things are going to happen... well, then they are. Affirmations are popular for a reason... they tend to work, because by putting positive out, you get positive in return.

WildThing
October 28th, 2009, 10:14 PM
I can't say whether it's psychology or a generational curse, in your case (or really in my own, which seems very similiar), but I can address one point;
The last bit about your family experiences the same sort of trends as you are? I find this happens to me too, just not with my blood-related family. People who share a niche of some sort with me. Maybe spiritual development's all the same general level...or maybe it's awareness...or maybe it's just the whole "birds of a feather" thing, "like attracts like"...but I've noticed that of this group, some I know very well and some I vaguely know, and of all different races/religions/upbringing/lifestyles/ages/etc... we all follow "trends" of energy, mood, thought. And it's so in sync, so concise, that I really haven't been able to overlook it.
I'm not sure what it is. Karma, perhaps? But it doesn't just happen with family, is my point...and in my experience, I don't think that this phenomena is an inherently negative thing.

And the truth is, your life is what YOU make it to be. Curses AND psychology are difficult to get out of. But you're your own master. You can do anything you set out to do. So I'm sure you'll find the answer as you set your mind to it.
The answer to my situation so far? I've been working on myself. Psychology AND spiritual, since I can't tell whether my problem's magic or science either. Meditation, self-help, affirmations, spells and prayers, everything I can think of. And as I break away from my family's way of living, as I've been growing spiritually, I find that the holds of whatever it is...seems to loosen. I realize and accept that some things can only be fixed by ourselves...and by our own paces. It just really helps if we know there IS a problem to begin with.

Paulienm
October 29th, 2009, 07:47 AM
That was my thought as well. It doesn't seem like a curse that has been stuck with your family, but that it is rather a result of the environment and your upbringing. That is not to say anything against you or your parents - but siblings, even those who are vastly different, tend to grow up with some of the same things if they are brought up by the same parents... even if it is years apart.


That's just it, I simply KNOW it's not a result of our upbringing and environment. At least, not entirely, some things are but those aren't the ones I'm adressing here. Therapy has already resolved most of it over the years, yet I'm sensing something.. grim about this whole thing.
I don't know how to explain it because I can't very well put my finger on it yet, but I do know it's not just the matter of unbringing, you're gonna have to take my word on that...

And Tobias, thanks for the information, I'm consulting google right now, though it's a little.. too christian for me. I am researching it a bit to take in anything that might be useful, thanks.

Lunacie
October 29th, 2009, 09:06 AM
Paulienm, I might have sounded like you 10 or 20 years ago. Before I learned that many of the "negative traits" in my family were simply undiagnosed neurological disorders - such as ADHD, Aspergers, Autism, Anxiety Disorder, Depression disorder - even Fibromyalgia. I'm not saying that's an issue in your family, just saying that there is sometimes an answer that hasn't been discovered or diagnosed yet for some of our familial struggles.

Kalika
October 29th, 2009, 09:58 AM
That's just it, I simply KNOW it's not a result of our upbringing and environment. At least, not entirely, some things are but those aren't the ones I'm adressing here. Therapy has already resolved most of it over the years, yet I'm sensing something.. grim about this whole thing.
I don't know how to explain it because I can't very well put my finger on it yet, but I do know it's not just the matter of unbringing, you're gonna have to take my word on that...



The bullet points that you listed as your issues are ones that nearly every family deals with at some point - some at the same times, some at different times. Every family goes through weak periods, some never come out of it, and feel "plagued" their entire lives. That doesn't necessarily mean that there is any sort of outside influence affecting their current situations.

If you feel that you have a family "curse", so be it. I was simply expressing my opinion that it does not sound like that is the case, based upon the information that you provided. However, that is for you to decide. I don't have to take your word for it, but I can keep from hijacking your thread. :smile:

Good luck.

Paulienm
October 29th, 2009, 07:18 PM
Thanks.

@ Tobias: I've looked up what you were talking about and yes, that's exactly what I mean. Still, I don't like the word 'sin', especially when it's used all over the place.. I've been able to see through it here and there and to take up a neutral perspective, I'm definately gonna use some of the info I found. Thanks again!

David19
October 29th, 2009, 07:33 PM
That was my thought as well. It doesn't seem like a curse that has been stuck with your family, but that it is rather a result of the environment and your upbringing. That is not to say anything against you or your parents - but siblings, even those who are vastly different, tend to grow up with some of the same things if they are brought up by the same parents... even if it is years apart.

It also sounds like it is more a negative outlook than a magic influence. You said that you set out to "prove to your family that you could be happy" - attitude has a big influence on your happiness. If you think bad things are going to happen... well, then they are. Affirmations are popular for a reason... they tend to work, because by putting positive out, you get positive in return.

Definitely agreed :thumbsup:.

David19
October 29th, 2009, 07:37 PM
That's just it, I simply KNOW it's not a result of our upbringing and environment. At least, not entirely, some things are but those aren't the ones I'm adressing here. Therapy has already resolved most of it over the years, yet I'm sensing something.. grim about this whole thing.
I don't know how to explain it because I can't very well put my finger on it yet, but I do know it's not just the matter of unbringing, you're gonna have to take my word on that...

And Tobias, thanks for the information, I'm consulting google right now, though it's a little.. too christian for me. I am researching it a bit to take in anything that might be useful, thanks.

I can't offer any help on breaking any family/generational curses, if that's what it is, although, maybe there's something in Hoodoo that could help (I'm only saying that 'cause, Hoodoo does have a lot of ways to undo curses, and other things, go to Lucky Mojo (http://www.luckymojo.com/), if that's something you want to explore). That said, try some affirmations, it might help :).

Good luck.

Tobias
October 30th, 2009, 01:16 AM
Thanks.

@ Tobias: I've looked up what you were talking about and yes, that's exactly what I mean. Still, I don't like the word 'sin', especially when it's used all over the place.. I've been able to see through it here and there and to take up a neutral perspective, I'm definately gonna use some of the info I found. Thanks again!

NP. Glad you're finding something you can use! :thumbsup:

RubyFire
November 1st, 2009, 11:53 PM
Try making an agreement with your siblings, that whatever it is you're pondering you will tell each other, you sound locked into isolation fields of your own making. So try to make a new habit, when feeling alone reach out to each other; I've read somewhere that it takes 6 weeks to make a new habit or to break an old one.

SacredNight
November 2nd, 2009, 03:10 PM
still i would like to see a family curse as much biological

meowmeow
December 21st, 2009, 03:51 AM
I'm skeptical about curses, usually it's something far less dramatic. Big families tend to have big problems, if they were all in identical situations or not- they still glen energy from one another and still influence one another. It doesn't take a curse to pass bad ideas or fear on, especially to someone you know personally.

However, I have seen alot of bad family influences and the main way to "break" a curse is to get away from the group and find something positive to fill your time. I'm talking about actually moving out and stopping communication with them all for a long time, and work on bettering yourself. It might be the environment, or group effort, that adds alot of bad energy into what you all do. Going solo is a good way to break that.