I’m planning a Pantheist funeral!

[TygerTyger]

After recently writing my will and with major surgery getting closer on my horizon my thoughts turned to what kind of funeral would I like if things don’t turn out as well as hoped?

I know some might think this morbid but as I am 105 (allegedly) I decided that it is something that I should get sorted, especially as I have a particular belief and I don’t want a CofE service.

I’ve researched secular funerals and the use of a celebrant to lead the service and the directions seem pretty easy to follow. I have to find a funeral director’s that provides this service and then start writing the particular requirements that I want.

I know that I want to be cremated.

I think that I would like my ashes deposited at sea, which is strange because I can’t swim and I’m not a sailor, but I do love watching the sea and I want to retire to the coast. I think it’s because I envisage my remains returning to the Earth’s cycle of creation all the sooner by sinking down to Davy Jones’s Locker?!

I would love to record a poem for my wife, a way of saying goodbye from beyond the grave – or is that too ghoulish?

Obviously I would have to sort out some music but that’s really difficult, I mean I have a hard enough time settling on a top ten as it is!

Also, no flowers please, I have hay-fever and I think the money would be better spent as a charitable gift.

Most definitely no black clothes, except for any Goths of course! It’s a celebration of a life lived not a chance for everyone to wander around like extras from The Matrix!

Finally, for everyone who makes the effort to turn up, a drink on me! That would be nice.

Any other ideas?

[TygerTyger]

No one got any ideas then?

It's going to happen to us all one day you know!

[Falling Star]

I believe that we are eternal souls on an eternal journey tyger tyger, so i have no fear of death,...i see it as only an illusion.

I understand though that at a certain time in our lives we have to face our own immortality, and very responsibly we have to consider the feelings and needs of our loved ones after our passing.

I can only admire you for this.

I do however think that with the love and blessings of all of your frinds here on mysticwicks, that you will be safe during your operation, and bounce back very quickly after your surgery.

I wish you peace of mind Tyger,Tyger what ever you decide your plans to be.
And once again you have to be admired for your foresight.:hugz:

[TygerTyger]

Thank you Falling Star, I really appreciate your comments.

I'm not anticipating my demise in the very near future but, taking a commonsense approach, I thought I might try and spare my wife as much anguish as possible if the worst comes to the worst.

To that end it seems reasonable to start planning now so that there's as little as possible for her to do when the moment comes.

It's actually giving me somehting to think about and, perhaps surprisingly, I don't find the process morbid at all, in fact quite the opposite!

[Falling Star]

Bless you Tyger tyger, I have always been taught that death is only the beginning......going home.

the pain is leaving our loved ones behind, but guides have also taught me that we travel together as souls..soulgroup.

love is an energy that cannot die, i sense a soulmate bond between you and your wife, an eternal bond of love that will never be broken.

as you are now only a hundred and something,lol you will not have to face this for another at least 30-40 yrs in reality.

Wishing you a journey of peace, and untold blessings.

[*oonagh*]

a party sounds like a good idea

[TygerTyger]

a party sounds like a good idea

Yeah, my thought too!

:hahugh:

[Nyxchik]

Sorry to be responding so late, but I think it's a great idea to plan for yourself- have been working on it myself, even tho I'm in my 30's and pretty healthy, as you said it is going to happen to us all, and who knows when? I had much rather have something planned out than leave it to my loved ones to try to figure out what I would've wanted. (of course this may be the control freak in me...)
And I agree that it's not morbid thinking, Tyger. We're conditioned to not talk about it, but why not? It's a natural progression that deserves a rite of passage...imo
A 'party' does sound good, with participants able to celebrate your life as well as your next adventure, whatever that holds. I like your bit of humor (i.e. hayfever so no flowers), will help ease the discomfort some may have in hearing your plans.
I also suggest action steps for loved ones-from experience working with bereavement clients (as well as being one myself), people want to 'do something' instead of sitting around feeling helpless. For example, listing those charities to send donations to, and maybe having your closest friends/family pick a song each... something that represents you to them(?) since you may have a difficult time picking it. I think asking people to bring a picture, quote, story that reminds them of you, to put in a scrapbook for your wife/family would be cool- much more personal than just signing a log...
While I think a letter to your wife sounds like something she would treasure, can I suggest that it may be something you ask a friend/family member to give to her instead of reading it at the ceremony/celebration? I don't know- I guess it depends on the individual, but I would rather that be something private that I write to my Beloved, or read from him if he should go first.
OK- hope I didn't ramble too much; thanks for bringing up this subject Tyger Tyger!
~nyx

[TygerTyger]

Many thanks Nyxchik, you've given me some great ideas! :idea2: