...I need help...

[Rae ShadowWolf]

This is my plea for help. This is my outcry. This is my last chance...

A little background:

Rob and I live in Bakersfield, and the Technology Field isn't yielding any jobs. With my "condition" (I'll get to that later) I can't seem to get hired. We've been unemployed since April. Money just seems to avoid us. We haven't boughten anything lately, because we need it for rent (which, although it isn't much, is killing us).

*stops to wipe the tears*

Lately, I've been so depressed and I've been in so much pain, its not funny. Both Physical and Emotional. Rob just doesn't seem to care. His Dad died when he was 12, his Mom wasn't much of a Mom. He grew up being the hated among 3 brothers. He didn't know love until he met me. He doesn't know how to show love back and that's killing me. All I want is for someone to listen. (Read my poem "Thoughts of the Day" you'll see how I'm feeling).

Money is short, Pain is getting more and more... I'm lossing all hope. I try to think happy, I try to better everything. Nothing is working. I did do a Money Spell and it worked as Rob is heading down to L.A. to fix someone's computer. But it isn't enough.

My condition is that I've got Carpal Tunnel in both hands, with cysts in both wrists along with pinched ulna nerves in my elbows. I was also born with West's Syndrom (which is Infantile Spasms (Worse than Grand-Mal Seisures)). I spasmed everyday until I was 4. Sometimes those spasms would last 30 seconds or more and I'd have upwards of 25+ a day. The medicine they gave me... well... lets just say that I'm not the prettiest girl in the world. Which is why no one will hire me for what I am skilled in.

This hurts when you are the best damn secretary that your H&R Block store has ever had, and your boss tells you, "You can't work up front." That crushed me.

I've been so depressed because we need this money to survive, but no one will hire me. I've been turned down from Rite-Aid! And Am-Pm! Gods, why does everyone hate me!

I call out to you, people of MW. The only people I know who care. Please, help me get through this. Just some comforting energies...anything...

I'm sorry....

[*Cerridwen*]

Oh hon ((((((((((((Sylent-Rayne)))))))))))))

I am so very sorry to hear of this, I am sending you energy right now I will light a candle for you this evening to help things get better for you.

Blessings

[SylverStar]

You have my energy and blessings. May things start to look up for you. ((((hugz)))) :)

[lovemy1dane]

((((hugs))))) I hope things look up for you soon. My mom has carpel tunnel so I can start to understand what you are feeling in physical pain. I am sending you lots of energy !!

[Rae ShadowWolf]

*crying* Thank you... Words cannot express my thanks.

(((hugs all)))

[Vuthiel]

I'm so sorry to hear the trouble you're having Rayne. My fiance and I have been unemployed for quite a while, and things were starting to look dire, so I can understand, to a certain extent, the trouble you're having. It's my most sincere hope that you find a way through the trials you face now. You can bet I'll be sending comforting energy your way, and I'll be sure to try doing a couple workings to send some good luck with money your way. Again, Rayne, I'm sorry you feel so upset. If you need someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me, I'm usually online most of the day (and night...).

Yahoo: Vuthiel_Rosvenir, AOL IM: Mtl Messiah.

~*~*~*~

[Devin]

I can offer lots of (((((HUGS))))))) and energy that things work out. Could you work from home?

Leslie

[LadyOak]

I am sorry for the pain you feel right now...Energy sent for you....

[Hope]

ohhhh ((((hugs))))

and love to you~~

It is so hard when everything is looking down isn't it.

Hang in there and know we can help you be a place to recover from the world.
love
hope

[WynnJera]

I am sending Energy to you hun ... I feel you pain for both being out of work and the siezures as I too was out of work for 18 moths and have E ... hugs and healing on the way .... :)

[Hawk Shadowsoul]

Sorry to hear this. Will be sending you energy and a candle burning. Remember, night is always darkest just before the dawn.

[Rae ShadowWolf]

I honestly don't know how to thank you all.

Never before have I have felt so loved. So many beautiful people. I truly thank each and every one of you.

[Aidron]

Rayne, I'm deeply sorry your life is in such shambles right now, but you are not alone.

The recent world politics have filled every country with negativity. Jobs are hard to find, people are soaking up the negativity and not even realizing that its affecting them.

Take a hot bath, relax, and do some meditations. I recommend all of you do this, cause you can't really alter your life to be more positive until you yourself are taken care of. Beyond that, cry. Yes, cry, just cry and cry until you cannot cry anymore. Let go of all that nasty negativity. It will truly drain you, but before long it will make you feel better. May take some time, it has for me in the past, but I truly believe that crying is the body's way of rejecting negative energy and vibrations before it can manifest itself as something worse, such as a physical condition.

Jobs and money are next to impossible to come across right now. Go after whatever you can find and your beliefs will tolerate.

Try to occupy your time with fun hobbies. Make things, draw, whatever. It will give you something to do when while you're re-cooperating and keep your mind from focusing on all that is wrong in your life in your eyes so you can go through the healing process. The focus will keep you from absorbing the negativity right back up too.

It's not much in the way of advice, but I'm here for you and I hope everythings turns around for the better soon. Scratch that, I know it will. Tell yourself that. Believe it will, and I'll be the one who just sits around hoping for you. :)

[DanuMoonrunner]

Sylent-Rayne
And these signs shall follow those that believeth in the name of the Goddess
They shall cast out demons and they shall speak in new tongues
And if they drink anything deadly, it shall not harm them.
They shall lay hands upon the sick and they shall recover
In the name of the Mother, Maiden and Crone.

My healing chant to you Sylent-Rayne. So mote it be.

[Chrystiona]

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."
William Morrow


Sweetie - things can only get better from here ! :)
Please remember that every cloud has a silver lining and that everything happens for a reason ! (even if we can't understand it ! ) :) ~
~All of my positive energy - ~
Love and Luck ....
Here's a page on homeopathic remedies for Carpal Tunnel... http://www.pccnaturalmarkets.com/health/Homeo/Carpal_Tunnel_hm.htm#Homeo-Directions-Insert
I find that mint oil works to soothe the pain too !
xoxoxo
chrys

[Old Witch]

Sweetie I wiil send Job Ju-Ju........and Healing energy and Calming energy to you........And lots of love too.......

Remember, don't give up on the job search!!

[Altheia]

Like I told you today...I'm here if you need to talk!

[athena422]

Rayne,

I'm sending energy your way. I know how hard it can be to try to find a job. One thing you might want to consider also is going to a staffing/temporary agency. That's how I found my current job. I had been without a job for over a year before I started as a temporary employee with the company I'm at. I've now been there for a little over a year. I'll light a candle for you tonight and ask some friends in my pagan community here to send energy your way too.

Blessings.

[sianand_flidais]

((((hugs))))) and energy on it's way to you.

May the light guide your way,
May the dark heal your pain,
May your strength grow each day,
And joy fill your life again.

So mote it be

*hugs*
sianand

[Rae ShadowWolf]

A little update:

Tonight, Rob came home. Something happened, something clicked in the right direction. I thought he would take in about $30. To my surprise, his friend's Mother was generous, he took home $160! That's incredible!

We also had a talk tonight, he seemed more open, and caring. He promised me he would be there for me more. I actually got to talk to him about my ways a little bit and he seemed fine with it, giving me a hug afterwards!

I know this isn't much, but, this is about the best news I've had all month!!

Thank you ever so much! All of you!

[Faery-Wings]

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

Energy still being sent- Good luck to you hon!

[Scarlettvixen]

SR while i have never been unemployed its been 2 yrs for my dh now due to the downturn in the IT industry
he picks up bits and pieces fixing computers and he has started teaching the internet to people and installing their new computers - lots people dont want to have to do that so he goes to their house and does everything from unpacking it from the box
still work was slow - we decided to sell the house so have had a massive clean out, and guess what - since he has decluttered his stuff he is getting very busy with work - good feng shui!

have u thought about doing volunteer work?
a gf of mine started out doing that and got a full time job through it

my energies and thoughts are with u hun
pm me if u ever want to talk
Scarlett

[IvyCeltress]

I'd so sorry. <<hug>> Healing and job energy on the way.

[Autumn]

Energy being sent!

Have you considered looking for help via programs that help folks with congenital problems? They may be able to point you toward employers who are not so narrow minded. also apply for jobs at local healthcare facilities they may be less mired in lookism and more ready to hire a good secretary...also investigate the Americans With Disabilities Act since neither your carpel tunnel nor your looks are your fault...to some extent you are being descriminated against! Hope this stuff helps...

[jillian fisher]

i do not know what life will give you later but your destiny will lead you down the right path

[Mdme Morella]

Oh honey!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *HUG*
I started crying when I read this. I will light a candle for you, and you have my love and energy comming.
things will work out.
*an endless supply of hugs*

[Prizm]

HUGE hugs and strength sent to you! Healing energy and blessings for finances and employment also on its way! Keep believing!!

[WandererInGray]

*bigs hugs*

I'm so sorry to hear that, sweetie! *soft smile* But good news the other day, eh? Things will pick up, someday I know.
My best wishes for you and your dh.

[JeweledNight]

I don't know how I managed to miss this thread!

Anyways, dear, you know I'm here for you <3 I know things have started to improve, and I'm so glad to hear it! I just wanted to remind you that no matter what, I'll always be here for you to talk to :)

Lots of good thoughts and positive energies are still headed your way!

[Autumn]

How are things going for you?

[Rubi Waters]

More Love, Hugz & energy sent your way.

[Rae ShadowWolf]

Thank you all, I definately feel the energies and the love. *smiles* Rob had that interview last week, still awaiting word. There will be another interview from another company this week, I know I'm feeling tons better. I'm more cheerful, I'm sleeping better (Can you believe it, I'm actually going to bed around midnight! (instead of 6am))

Heck, I think Ash-cat is doing better!!

Rob has been kinder. The other day, he brought me home some incense sticks, and last night he took me out to dinner, so something must be clicking with him...finally.

I again thank each and every one of you. If it weren't for you guys, I'd still be overly depressed. Much love and hugs to all!!