umm... i need a little help... please?

[garden witch]

okay, here goes. I'm living with my Mother and Stepdad and I'm trying to wiccan, but it isn't working. I told my mom about how I feel, but she totally rejected it. She took away all my candles and books on Wicca because she seems to think I'm worshipping the "devil", when I don't even beleive in him. The more i try to explain to her about it, the more she loses her trust in me. I still beleive in what i do... it's just kinda hard not to get mad at her hen she wont even try to listen to me. My Mom is super Catholic too, and i don't know if that's why, but i'd really like to know why she's acting this way! please help me! thank you in advance.

Blessed Be,
Mia

[Merrie]

Merry Meet and Welcome!
I have a similar predicament, so you have my sympathies. My family is Roman Catholic, and so very not into this. :( I mentioned the word wicca in a conversation once and my mother went into a spiel..."It takes power from something other than our god, who is a jealous god...(At this point I stopped listening) Yaddda yadda yadda..." :D Anyway, I've recently learned to be more subtle around my mother because she doesen't get it (I think, somehow, she sees it as a threat) because I do love her, after all, and lack of trust is fun for no one. You've obviously found this site, and there are many others, like witchvox, where you can learn and socialize with others like you. Just be patient, be carefull, and know that, while she may control alot of your life just now, What you believe and pray and feel is something she cant take from you. Candles and books mean so much less than your own heart, which is untouchable. Hope i helped, and feel free to e-mail me or something if you want to talk to someone.:)

[Lilu]

Hi,

I was wondering how old you are garden witch?

While I fully sympathise with your situation, the fact remains that in America, according to the law, your parents can pretty much dictate what religions you can and can't study.

My advice would be to continue to read what you can on the Net, and in books if you can get them, you will be 18 eventually and then your parents can't dictate what you want to study.

If you're already 18, then they have no say, you're an adult, do as you see fit.

Bright Blessings,
Lilu

[Rick]

...I think I'd have to say that as long as you live in your parents home, no matter what your age, you should be respectful of their wishes, insofar as burning candles, having certain books, etc. That can't change how you feel, or who you are, but it just might help create an atmosphere of mutual respect (& will probably save a lot of arguments & lectures, as well).

Hail & Welcome! Someone will be along presently with the Lemonade & Chocolate Chip Cookies. In the meantime, have some Spam. :D

[Faery-Wings]

I think Lilu and Rick gave great advice (except for the spam, do not, I repeat.. do *not* eat the spam!!!). Believe me, I was in your shoes (not so much about being Pagan, b/c I wasn't as a teen, but I had other issues LOL)~ and it is easier to just bide by their rules.

However, if you feel that you can sit down and have a *calm* (can't stress this one enough) conversation, it might be helpful.
http://www.witchvox.com/ had a section that had sample letters to teachers that explained the basics of witchcarft. And wouldn't you know, for the life of me, I can't find them now. If you can find the letter on the site, you could print it out and have your mom read it over and then discuss it.

Whatever you do- please respect your parents!! And Merrie is so completely on the mark- no one can take what is in your heart.

Good luck!

Chris

[Astraea]

I agree with everyone here, they offer great advice. Definitely respect your parents wishes, believe me, it will make things go so much smoother for you.
As far as candles and so on, just remember that they are just "tools" to assist you in your celebrations, in your rituals, meditation, etc. If your spiritual path is truly in your heart, you can carry on without the use of the candles and and other things for a while. I know it's hard to deal with the fact that you must abide by your parents rules until you are of age, but we all had to do it and we survived! You will make it, and remember that if the situation can't be remedied, then don't stress it! If you can talk to your parents more without a catastrophe, great. If not, you have your beliefs firmly in your heart and that's what is important.

[Mariposa De La Luna]

There are elements of Paganism that you can study without your parents feeling too uneasy. You can study animals, the seasons, weather, meditation, herbs and plants, recycling and the environment. You can grow a garden or just a little flower in a pot. These things are not obviously pagan but may help you get closer to Mother Earth. Take walks in nature. What you think about and observe there is something your parents will never be able to take away from you.

[rantnraven]

And welcome to the porch.

The irony of this whole thing is that Pagan's of old may well have had the same thoughts when there young started converting to Christianity.

Just remember, there is nothing in the material things that make us Pagan. What makes us what we are is what we find in our heats - the rest are symbolism and such that may help us focus but can be easily discarded.

Don't hold anger but, rather, respect for their wishes. They do unto you out of concerne and care and what they believe in their hearts. Surely you must understand that.

Hold tight. Time can change people but people cannot change time. Patience.

Bright blessings,
RnR