Ok I'm so sick of being stubborn.........

[SilentStarWolf]

Hi everyone. My dad knows of my interest in Paganism and so does my stepmom. My dad bought this book called: Wicca: Exploring the world of Wicca and Witchcraft. I absolutely refused to sit down and look at/discuss the book with him.......because I just figured it would be written all slanted (point of view rather) but in order to foster some communication..........I am willing to possibly sit down with him and discuss it. What do you all think?

[Lunacie]

I've never heard of this book so I looked at Amazon.com and couldn't find it there. What I did find was this: Witchcraft: Exploring the World of Wicca. I included the link so you could check out the reviews. If this is the book your Dad bought, I'd look for something less biased (slanted) and ask him to read your book while you read his. Then you can have a discussion. That should be fair, eh? But chances are that he will never accept you embracing anything except Christianity. The most you may expect might be that he will tolerate it and let you do your own thing but he probably won't ever like it.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/080105382X/104-9720974-0387125?v=glance

[Xander67]

actually, there is a lil preview of the book here on amazon
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/080105382X/104-7925457-2602332?v=glance

it appears to be a rather objective look and I think your Dad is honestly trying to understand you a lil...

[SilentStarWolf]

Yes your right.........that is the title of it. I typed it wrong. I don't think he will accept that there are even other religions out there. And as far as giving him a book of mine to read I can't. He was the one that threw them away last time.

[Xander67]

I've never heard of this book so I looked at Amazon.com and couldn't find it there. What I did find was this: Witchcraft: Exploring the World of Wicca. I included the link so you could check out the reviews. If this is the book your Dad bought, I'd look for something less biased (slanted) and ask him to read your book while you read his. Then you can have a discussion. That should be fair, eh? But chances are that he will never accept you embracing anything except Christianity. The most you may expect might be that he will tolerate it and let you do your own thing but he probably won't ever like it.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/080105382X/104-9720974-0387125?v=glance
i dont think this book is Biased at all, I read the sample pages

[VelvetBlade]

I think it's good that he's trying.....be careful not to cut off your nose to spite your face!

Sit down and talk to him...

~AW

[Xander67]

Yes your right.........that is the title of it. I typed it wrong. I don't think he will accept that there are even other religions out there. And as far as giving him a book of mine to read I can't. He was the one that threw them away last time.
the book does make it clear that Wicca is a path on its own... and is not reverse christianity or satanism... I would say it is a good read

[SilentStarWolf]

Actually, what he has said when I've brought it up (i.e. told him I rebought my books) was okay thats fine you can do what you want. but you know how I feel about it.

[mato]

First off the book is totally fudged up. Unfortunately it is one of the kinder fundamentalists tools. Talking is good you can go over some of your opinions and your beliefs and come to some sort of common ground that doesnt involve flames and stakes. Basically I think that they just want to know that you are not insane in the membrane and know what you are doing and what you believe. Talk is good, just dont let them get away with BS, and try to respect their ppls beliefs.

[mato]

i dont think this book is Biased at all, I read the sample pages
Just saying you cant tell a book by a few pages... Those were the 'nice' ones.

[Xander67]

I agree with Mato on the talking...

as long as your Dad can Respect you for who you are, and respect your beliefs... and doesnt try to impose, convert, or anythign along those lines, then I say go for it, sit down and talk with him.

[Xander67]

Just saying you cant tell a book by a few pages... Those were the 'nice' ones.
agrees

[SilentStarWolf]

First off the book is totally fudged up. Unfortunately it is one of the kinder fundamentalists tools. Talking is good you can go over some of your opinions and your beliefs and come to some sort of common ground that doesnt involve flames and stakes. Basically I think that they just want to know that you are not insane in the membrane and know what you are doing and what you believe. Talk is good, just dont let them get away with BS, and try to respect their ppls beliefs.
Then again, It might be difficult to talk with him about this because I'm sure he would expect me to back my beleifs up?

[Xander67]

Then again, It might be difficult to talk with him about this because I'm sure he would expect me to back my beleifs up?
on that note,

sometimes, Radical Christians will sit there and DEBATE you and have scriptures
just waiting for you...

if anyone were to ask me to back up how I believe, I would simply tell them that
I will not becuase I cannot...

my beliefs are personal to me, based on my views of the world and spirituality.

if I have to defend my beliefs that means im not being accepted... I would gladly answer
any honest questions ...however....

[mato]

I like those times, then I wip out my rose (literal rose) and ask them to deny its existance and it's reality. It is fun to see their faces when they finally understand or get frustrated and write me off as a whacko. Though I think I might have ruined a few ppls romantic notions...

[Xander67]

LOL

with family, these talks always usually get rather INTENSE and Dramma filled... good luck!

[mato]

Ya jerry springer aint got nothin on us... It's all fun and games until some one gets a chair to the head.

[SilentStarWolf]

My dad is so afraid that "Wicca is too much like Witchcraft"..........maybe I should ask him what he thinks a Witch is?
Oh yeah, maybe too I should have never brought up my interests in the first place but what's done is done.

My stepmom however came into my room once and says "Now I'm mad (well to me she IS crazy but I knew she meant angry LOL) she proceeded to say I'm going to hell, asked me why I didn't want to get to know the Christian God (the one that she says I will hopefully spend my life with). Also said 'There is only ONE God not 'a stupid Goddess and God!' (in her oh so whiny bitchy tone)

Can you see why I can't seem to reason with them both and was SO happy to move out?

[Hawk Shadowsoul]

This is the path they are on in this life at this time. It may be inconvient for you now, but try to respect their beliefs, even if they cannot return the respect at this time. In another life the circumstances may have been or may be reversed.Maybe understanding on your part can prevent a rift between you and your parents. Above all, be true to your ownself.

[Lunacie]

Off-topic... Hello HawkShadowsoul. I didn't realize until just now that you guys are out there in western Kansas. When we were in Hoisington it was very hard to find any other Pagans or Wiccans. I'm glad to see other folks from Kansas posting on MW these days. I don't feel so lonely anymore.

[Nikita2oo4]

I like those times, then I wip out my rose (literal rose) and ask them to deny its existance and it's reality. It is fun to see their faces when they finally understand or get frustrated and write me off as a whacko. Though I think I might have ruined a few ppls romantic notions...

Thats very interesting in my opinion and very true. How can you deny the exsistance of a rose? It's almost impossible.

You aren't alone, my mom has the same opinion as your parents. My mom came home one day and was like "you need to volenteer at the church and get away from all that mystic stuff". Some parents don't want to accept a different religion other than what they believe in. How can they prove there was a God who saved the world from sins and all that stuff. It could be a myth people made up to be able to explain why we are here, the purpose in life, and how the world started. That's why we have mythology. (I'm currently learning about mythology and folktales in school)

I would say sit down with him and explain things. Maybe he might become a little more open to the idea. Atleast he is trying to make an effort to understand. Who knows what will happen just hope for the best.

[SilentStarWolf]

This is the path they are on in this life at this time. It may be inconvient for you now, but try to respect their beliefs, even if they cannot return the respect at this time. In another life the circumstances may have been or may be reversed.Maybe understanding on your part can prevent a rift between you and your parents. Above all, be true to your ownself.
Oh definitely, I'm trying to respect them. It's just aggravating. (as are a lot of things in life) :)

[Hawk Shadowsoul]

Oh definitely, I'm trying to respect them. It's just aggravating. (as are a lot of things in life) :)
I wonder how boring life would be if everything went exactly the way we wanted it to. Might be fun to find out!!! I caught more hell from family when I was a Mormon than I do now as a Pagan. Go figure. Of course my family all live down south and I'm in Kansas. Distance has really improved relationships! Good luck.

[mato]

meditation usually cures all ills... but in this case I would suggest a lock on your door...

[Ben Trismegistus]

Hi everyone. My dad knows of my interest in Paganism and so does my stepmom. My dad bought this book called: Wicca: Exploring the world of Wicca and Witchcraft. I absolutely refused to sit down and look at/discuss the book with him.......because I just figured it would be written all slanted (point of view rather) but in order to foster some communication..........I am willing to possibly sit down with him and discuss it. What do you all think?
The fact that he's even bought ANY book, even one with a possible slant, is a HUGE step in the right direction, and a sign that he's trying to understand you. You should absolutely sit down with him and read/discuss the book together. If the book is slanted/biased, calmly tell your dad what parts of the book are inaccurate, and explain how it differs from your own spirituality. He's giving you an opening by initiating the conversation, and frankly you'd be stupid not to take advantage of his olive branch.

Buy him another book, perhaps "When Someone You Love Is Wiccan" or one of the Cunningham books, and suggest that you look through that one together as well. Remember that this is very difficult for them - they've been raised their entire lives to believe that there is only ONE God, and that anyone who believes differently is a heretic who is going straight to hell. Rather than antagonizing them, try to help them to see the beauty in your spirituality, and how your religion and their religion are simply two different ways to find the same thing.

[SilentStarWolf]

The fact that he's even bought ANY book, even one with a possible slant, is a HUGE step in the right direction, and a sign that he's trying to understand you. You should absolutely sit down with him and read/discuss the book together. If the book is slanted/biased, calmly tell your dad what parts of the book are inaccurate, and explain how it differs from your own spirituality. He's giving you an opening by initiating the conversation, and frankly you'd be stupid not to take advantage of his olive branch.

Buy him another book, perhaps "When Someone You Love Is Wiccan" or one of the Cunningham books, and suggest that you look through that one together as well. Remember that this is very difficult for them - they've been raised their entire lives to believe that there is only ONE God, and that anyone who believes differently is a heretic who is going straight to hell. Rather than antagonizing them, try to help them to see the beauty in your spirituality, and how your religion and their religion are simply two different ways to find the same thing.

I admit, I'm writing this thread from my college dorm room. (Finally college!) So it would be difficult for us to sit and talk. I'm also not speaking to him right now because of certain things. So it's hard to call a truce/discuss things when I'm four hours away. I should have seized the opportunity l guess back when I was living under his roof. Then again, he never mentions it anymore so why bother?

[SilentStarWolf]

meditation usually cures all ills... but in this case I would suggest a lock on your door...
Yeah I did have a lock on my door, but my room was invaded when I wasn't home. I literally came home to find everything missing.

[Ben Trismegistus]

I admit, I'm writing this thread from my college dorm room. (Finally college!) So it would be difficult for us to sit and talk. I'm also not speaking to him right now because of certain things. So it's hard to call a truce/discuss things when I'm four hours away. I should have seized the opportunity l guess back when I was living under his roof. Then again, he never mentions it anymore so why bother?
Because he's your father? And, difficult as it may be, it's nicer to have a relationship with your family than to cut them off entirely?

OK, that's a simplistic answer. In some cases, there's simply no way to reconcile your world-view with that of your parents, and there's little you can do but keep them at arm's length for the rest of your life. But that's very sad (that's the case with my wife's family, and it upsets her every day). So you might as well give it a shot - you've got nothing to lose.

[SilentStarWolf]

Because he's your father? And, difficult as it may be, it's nicer to have a relationship with your family than to cut them off entirely?

OK, that's a simplistic answer. In some cases, there's simply no way to reconcile your world-view with that of your parents, and there's little you can do but keep them at arm's length for the rest of your life. But that's very sad (that's the case with my wife's family, and it upsets her every day). So you might as well give it a shot - you've got nothing to lose.
Yes I understand that it is better to have a relationship with them. It's not just my world-view that has spawned this. Like I said before it is other things also. I'm in the process of going to counseling to try and deal with these issues I'm having with my Dad, so I WILL take him back (I'm just very angry right now) It will all just take a while.

[Ben Trismegistus]

Good luck. Healing family issues is a very long and difficult process.

[SilentStarWolf]

Good luck. Healing family issues is a very long and difficult process.Thanks for the well-wishes, I will keep you updated if you all would like :)