Rant

[Gareth]

Ok, I don't like doing this, but the whole thing really bothers me.
My wife has a friend who is going through a divorce. Her and her soon to be ex have a little girl.
She is wiccan, he is catholic. He has threatened a serious custody battle claiming she is unfit due to her religion.(real nice huh?) He claims that she is unfit because the daughter was with mommy at a witches meet-up! If anybody has ever been to a meet-up you know it's usually at a popular restaurant. For get about HIS drinking, that's got nothing to do with it.(that's what I heard anyways)

The only reason I know is I had been right near my wife when she got the e-mail about it.
My wife was saying loudly, "WHAT?!?", when I looked over and she showed me. Needless to say I was angry as hell! I said call the A.C.L.U., and see if they like what he says! The little girl was NEVER involved in ANY rituals, this I do know.

I heard about this yesterday, so I'm not sure what's going to happen. But my wife's friend has our support. I've met my wife's friend but not him, she is a real nice woman who does not deserve this.

My wife claims he is only doing this to hurt her. Sounds right to me, but I'm only hearing one side. Like I said I never met him, not that I would take his side. I mean, come on, using religion as the basis of a custody battle? I don't get people some times.

Lisa and I have had very long discussions about the "what if" factor. I'm sure we might be a little more civil than most because we don't want the headaches. :)

Thank you for letting me get this off my chest. I needed that.

[Scarlettvixen]

hugzzz Gareth
when some marriages fall apart love turns to hate very rapidly and one or both partners ends up being irrational and have this hurt at any cost attitude!
and the child/children are usually caught in the fall out
its sad
all u can give her is yr support

[Matt]

seems like he's doing it out of spite man do i hate people like that. Religion should effect nothing in the world along with age race and sexual prefference!

[LadyOak]

Yep, like you said the little girl is caught in the middle and is the victim of what sounds like "Daddy's" spite.

But please give yourself credit for your ability to realise you only know one side of the story...

[Hawk Shadowsoul]

Yep, like you said the little girl is caught in the middle and is the victim of what sounds like "Daddy's" spite.

But please give yourself credit for your ability to realise you only know one side of the story...

Ditto. It is disgusting when adults use children to hurt and fight with each other.

[Phoenix Blue]

I'm not sure a judge would be allowed to consider the parents' religion explicitly in a custody case. Parental behavior that proves risky to the child - i.e., involving the child in a cult that actually is dangerous - could be considered, but otherwise, a judge's determnation against a parent solely on the basis of religion would be a clear violation of that parent's First Amendment rights.

[Gareth]

I'm not sure a judge would be allowed to consider the parents' religion explicitly in a custody case. Parental behavior that proves risky to the child - i.e., involving the child in a cult that actually is dangerous - could be considered, but otherwise, a judge's determnation against a parent solely on the basis of religion would be a clear violation of that parent's First Amendment rights.
That's why I said to my wife to tell her friend to call the ACLU, I think they would do something in her favor on the religion issue.
But like I said, he was using a witches meet up as one of 3 reasons. :geez:
I don't know for sure what the other 2 are. I'll find out later today when my wife comes home. :)

[VelvetBlade]

I'm sure things are going to be difficult enough for this little girl, without all the additional controlling BS that seems to be going along with this situation. I'm glad her mom has friends like you guys for support, Gareth. They'll all be in my thoughts...

~AW

[docdoo]

Gareth, I am so sorry to hear about this. I have 3 children and I practice alone but my boys actively 'pray'. In fact my middle child has recently gotten his first tarot deck (he is 11...almost 12) which he adores and in fact is quite intuitive with. I must admit that I can sort of understand where your wifes friend is coming from. My elder boys (12 and 11) are from a previous marriage. I just turned 31 and if you do the math you can see that I had children and got married very young. Anyway though my first husband had the best of intentions he and I were still very young and basically just grew apart. In any case I have been divorced now for 11 years and since our divorce he has become very religous. He and his family both are in a sort of 'grass roots' christianity which has nothing in common with anything christian.

It seems that they are given to the mind that Black people were placed upon this earth as slaves...god intended that to be their one purpose. They claim this information is in the bible, I have read the bible a good many times and find it to be a good read but never did I take anything written there as saying what they are claiming. In any case I am now a witch and it is something that my children and I make a point of NOT telling their father. My children have known of my spiritual path for as long as I have and they find it to be fulfilling and enlightening. They particuarly love the aspect that acceptance and tolerance go hand in hand with the course I have chosen. The mother and father that I pray too would never punish someone to eternal damnation because of their religious views.

In any case it sounds to me as though he is angry and using this as a basis for contesting...I have found however that in many situations like this that the husband doesnt necessarily want the children because HE wants them. Rather sometimes he wants the children because it would kill HER not to have them! Im sure that in the end justice will prevail and the child will be placed with whomever will care for her the best. I wish her luck and hope it turns out well for her in the end,
til next time,

[Hoot]

when some marriages fall apart love turns to hate very rapidly and one or both partners ends up being irrational and have this hurt at any cost attitude!
and the child/children are usually caught in the fall out

This is true, and just horrible when it happens. I have watched it up close, many years after the divorce, with my in-laws. My husband's parents hate each other so much that many, long years ago they became absolutely obsessive and allowed their hate to replace any love they had for their kids. (They each would deny that, though, of course.) It's all been about using anything they can - especially their kids - as weapons against one another. This has, needless to say, pushed their kids away as adults and torn apart any family ties. It's so sad and useless and has hurt my husband to his core.

If people are willing to go to this extreme of using their own children, then it doesn't surprise me at all that they would use anything, particularly religion, against one another.