Not a regular

[Astraea]

I just wanted to comment on some things that were posted under another thread I wrote in about Christian-Wicca.
I've been to this site only a few times and each visit was within the same week. I don't have time to visit this site or be online often because I travel so much. I noticed several people saying "I thought this subject was over" or "thought this subject had been put to bed" and so on, but I just wanted to say that the subject was not an old one to me and would't have been to anyone else who might have been new here. I'm sorry if all of you who are regulars here were sick of the subject matter. If I had known it had been discussed before I'd have never wasted my time posting anything.

I even mentioned that I was stating opinions. But people still spoke of attacks and implied that people were arguing, or even angry. I didn't like noticing that people here were so quick to say that those who are disagreeing with them are "angry" or attacking. I noticed it being said not just in the thread I posted to, but in other threads I read as well. People disagreeing with each other and then accusing people on the other side of the arguement of "attacking" and being angry. To me, that's as disrespectful as actually attacking someone.
It's almost like implying that someone is not decent enough to share opposing opinions and still have respect for others. If people can't read opposing opinions without accusing the others of being angry, that's kind of sad (in my opinion).

[Dathan]

you know what that is the exact reason i have come in here to look around but never registered myself!! i read a bunch of topics where people would disagree and other people would accuse them of being "negative" or whatever. so disagreements are negative energy? i think not. and when you disagree with a person's spiritual views you are "attacking" them and stirring up anger and hate??? if someone wants to disagree and voice their opinion, how is that "negative"????!!!!! you actually seemed to me to be the best informed person who spoke about that subjectand you never attacked.

i also hear you about being new and not knowing what topics are old and what are new. so how are you supposed to know that topic you talked about was talked over a million times here?

if we go around saying every disagreement is negative and stirs anger then how can we ever learn anything??!! i love hearing views on topics that are completely oposite of mine. especially when they don't agree with something i apply to my life like my spiritual path!!!

[Semele]

i also hear you about being new and not knowing what topics are old and what are new. so how are you supposed to know that topic you talked about was talked over a million times here?

The topics are always availiable to be read and posted on. In such a case when someone brings up a topic that is already a thread...we should just redirect them to that thread. There were some hurt feelings over that thread the first go round here so we had to edit a little so that we wouldn't offend any newcomers with the emotional attacks at each other. The hurt feelings were mended as best we could, but the memory is still there. Unfortunately this was one of those conversations that does go from voicing opinions to out right attacking...by many towards many! It went further than sharing opinions and simple refuting of those opinions. That is why I feel there is still some negative energy hanging around that topic. Hopefully everyone will heal from that tragedy and we can finally discuss it without the fear and anger involved.

[Kaylara]

There were a lot of things going on behind the scenes of that particular thread... (And trust me, it was not a pretty sight) We were getting nuemerous complaints, many people were upset, and some people even wanted to boycott the site because they were that upset.

I as a moderator here have no problems with heated discussions... But when it starts getting to the point where you are making personal attacks, I have a huge problem with that...

Not all of these attacks were made public, there were pm's flying back and forth...

I am all for opposing views, I'll play "devils advocate" if the mood takes me. But when I am getting several e-mails a day, and people are coming on to AIM and telling me and other moderators that they are really upset about this, it has to stop.

I will never stop someone from discussing a subject, I will however, close down a thread if I find that people are attacking each other.

I know that I haven't given you much more information than any of the other posts. But at this point, after a few weeks of dealing with it, many people hurt and upset over this, I say it's over...
If you are interested, there is a thread in the New Pagans forum discussing the same subject, only without the incidents that caused the last one to be shut down...

Sorry that this is a little long winded and repetitive...

Kaylara

[Astraea]

No, I wasn't interested in continuing on with the subject. I guess that was my point, I voiced my opinion and wasn't looking for some on-going battle over it. I didn't realize there were so many people who visited here who couldn't handle that. I understand if there were people who were not nice about it, and that is unfortunate.

I understand Dathan's comment about not posting here because of people's reactions to those who disagree with them. That was one reason for my hesitation here as well. It's not fun to know you can't voice an opinion without being accused of attacking. Especially among Pagans, who are supposedly rather tolerant of those with differing opinions. If someone is too sensitive to opposing opionins, I guess that is unfortunate also.

[Wyrdsister]

I guess I'm one of the lucky one's here as I seem to never run across any discussions that I find too heated. I have heard about this sort of thing though and I agree: I would find it very disconcerting and would wonder if this is the community for me.

Any online community will have its problems, but I believe Mysticwicks is one that tries hard to promote harmony and honest discussion and strongly speaks out against personal attacks and slander. The vast majority of people at MW want people to feel they are welcome here and that their voices are valuable. I do hope both of you (Astraea and Dathan) will give MW a try and stick around for awhile. I for one am glad you're here! :)

Hope to see you around the boards,

Wyrdsister

[Astraea]

Thank you Wyrdsister! I appreciate that. I agree that Mystic Wicks seems to have so many people who want us all to feel welcome. I think it was just unfortunate that the first post I made was to such a heated thread. I actually haven't been lucky enough to get here often to read many topics. I wish I could be here more.

Thank you again, I'm glad you're here too!

[MystyPines]

Astraea Merry Meet and Welcome to MysticWicks!

Just wondering what does Lucubratorian mean? [smile]

Bright Blessings!

:p

[Astraea]

I don't think it's a real word! A friend of mine said something about "lucubration" to me once, it means to study or to study hard. I had to look it up in the dictionary because I had no idea. He was talking about me always reading about different spiritual paths and so on. I said I was a "lucubrator" and it didn't sound like a very nice word, so the I said lucubratorian, lol.
Just a dumb made up word really.