Something that is constantly on my mind...

[Mindflayer]

Don't know why I'm saying this, maybe by writing it, it'll help me figure it out, then again it might just make me sound crazy...



For years, every since I can remember, I've run these...stories...in my head, they all have to do with a few familar things...


I am always a "superhero" I guess you could say, I mean I have "powers" and I save people (like the whole of the multi-verse

I'm always working for "higher-powers".

and it always involves the elements, and not just the primary 4...there's 9 in these scenarios:

Wind, Water, Earth, Fire, Light(good), Dark(Evil), Shadow(Chaos, Freedom, what I identify with the most), Time, and Null (Null is to Energy, like Anti-matter is to matter)

I started thinking up all this stuff way before I had even heard of Paganism, and the scary part is the more and more I started reading about paganism, the more and more these stories (and some of my personal theories) started to match up!



I always thought that these were just fantasies perhaps, far-out fantasies that just keep my mind occupied, but recently I've thought maybe there an expression of a feeling I have, a craving, not a craving for power, but for importance, I WANT to be important to a lot of people, I want to feel needed, I want to help people (and I'm talking on a HUGE scale)...


maybe it's just an over-active imagination, maybe it's my mind creating a situation in my head to make me feel better about the fact that I'll probably never get to be extremely important...

I don't know...

[asamananara]

It seems to me that you just described a personal path of power-
mayhaps you should think raising this from the shadows of your
imagination into the light of action. I think you've just laid
out the foundations of a viable magical system which you should
explore, define, and apply.

[Dentrick]

Sounds familiar.

[Antoninus]

**Nods** I often do that to sleep and to keep my mind occupied. It probably means a pre-emptive fascination with magic.

[LeftToWonder]

I have one vison that I always use when I'm depressed. Every time I get depressed I add a little something to it. Sad to say, its pretty detalied. :lol:

[HallsOfAvalon]

Well, set goals for yourself and do something everyday to achieve them. It might be a phone call a day.... that is one less phone call that is needed.

A superhero is a hard goal to achieve, but what about a police officer.... or fireman/woman?

Or donate blood.... every pint of blood you give... gives the gift of life to 3 people. You can donate blood every 56 days. In a years time you could save 15 people. In 4 years that's 60 people. That to me is allot of people saved with little effort. (I know everyone hates needles, but sometimes you just gotta suck it up for the better of mankind.)

[Mindflayer]

what about a police officer.... or fireman/woman?
couldn't pass the physical tests =\



Or donate blood.... every pint of blood you give... gives the gift of life to 3 people. You can donate blood every 56 days. In a years time you could save 15 people. In 4 years that's 60 people. That to me is allot of people saved with little effort. (I know everyone hates needles, but sometimes you just gotta suck it up for the better of mankind.)

I don't just hate needles...I'm TERRIFIED, as in phobic...no stabbing things...

[mothwench]

are you artistic? you write well. have you ever considered getting into the comic book trade, or righting stories? maybe you have a friend who's good at art, and you could work together? i think you have a wonderful imagination, and good stories are hard to come by these days. :colorful:

[Noressa]

Stories are a wonderful way to bring heros into peoples lives, magically! It's not really the words that are important, though... its the story you're telling...

[Laurelei]

Sometimes I run stories in my head. I'll tell you a bit about the longest running one.

The world is heavily forested and before the industrial revolution - that's because I'd prefer to live in a heavily forested environment and I can't in real life. Magic is more tangible. In this one, I started off as the villager who's village was razed to the ground. To cut a very long story short, I ended up in a fortress style city, where I met someone who, together, we could summon forth tornadoes, fireballs, lightening e.t.c. After accidentally destroying a few houses we had to run away. We got as far as the Great Pine Forests when the militia cought up with us, and made us come back to the plains because there was an army after Southern Civilisation (how stereotypical).

No, I'll end up talking for half an hour. Suffice to say I ended outdoing my magical partner, ran off with a vampire (a rather nasty one too) and ended up 6 miles beneath the earth running down subterranian passageways from bizarre creatures.

It went down the dustbin, but hey it's still fun. And yes, It's still going. Yesterday before I fell asleep I puppeteered a few skeletons magically and went on a lava hopping adventure with the vampire. He's really good at walking on ceilings like a fly, ya know.

But to the point, I don't think it shows a craving for power, at least not now. In this story I've always ended up leaving burning corpses and burning cities in my wake, and being followed everywhere by national security lunatics. If mindless head-movie entertainment has tought me anything, it's that power corrupts and I don't want much in real life.

With these stories, I like to learn from them, but I never find myself wishing it was like that in 'real' life. No, not even in the good bits when I'm sat at the bottom of a lake watching the light breaking through the water... ahh. A sea monster will come up to attack me soon there anyway.

But don't stop doing these stories, whatever you do. I would never have been as good at visualisation if it wasn't for these spontanious practice sessions :).

I didn't know that others ran stories like that. I once drew a pic of the stone circle in the story and my friend asked about it. I explained and asked her if she ran stories in her head... apparently she didn't.

[Kalika]

:lol:

This sounds all too familiar. I use it as a way to help me fall asleep... and then they run into dreams. :)

[HallsOfAvalon]

I don't just hate needles...I'm TERRIFIED, as in phobic...no stabbing things...

So are allot of people that give blood every 8 weeks.... they have their rituals they do, to be able to do it. Most won't look, some feel they have to. Some get ice applied to the back of their necks for prevention of a reaction. Some have friends hold their hands. Yet some hold stuffed animals.

It is something you can do to help many people. It's worth giving it a try.

I donate every 8 weeks (when I can).

I have a reaction every time, and work in the field. I know it's all mind over matter, but I can't stop it.

So I am one of the many who put ice on the back of my neck.... it helps me.

I hang out in the chair for about 5 mins after, to make sure I am all right.

[Mindflayer]

good for the people who give blood...3 cheers...


no stabbing things near me though...thanks :)

[Pesha]

But hum you are important. You are a beloved child of the universe and so very important. Place your storeies or feeling down and keep a record of them. They sound like they are interesting. But mostly never ever feel that you are not important, because you certainly are.

BB
DS.

[Tiana_Ecarias]

Write these stories down, you never know, perhaps your grandchildren will see them, and feel closer to you because they have similar dreams or fantasies. I often dream up a story and it sounds wonderful, but rarely does it get finished.;)

[Mindflayer]

don't know why, but Tiana, I took your advice :p

I've been writing it down, I split it into chapters for organization, and they are rather short, but I just got to the first key point in them, and I'm on like chapter 6 or 7 :p

[Teshuva3D]

When I was a kid,I was a chronicles of narnia fanatic..and would make up alot of scenarios in my head involving the characters from those books but changed so I was involved in the stories too..
I,of course,often "saved the day,battle,etc.."
these daydreams carried me through alot of lonely times...

[PoetryInDespair]

:lol: I throught I was the only one that did that! I write them down in math class, Lol not like I'm going to pass the tests if I listen anyways.

[Moon Daughter]

i can relate to what you are saying. i myself often come up with something like scenario in my head, which develops over the course of a few weeks or even months. the themes are often a bit similar, and all involve me doing something heroic, and sacrificing a part of myself for the 'higher cause' ( for the lack of a better word). somehow, it is always supposed to help 'awaken' humanity. neither one of the scenarios has an actual ending though. i think it's because i myself need to 'awaken' first.