Next question :: Can you be in love with someone and not be physically attracted to..

[Aine of the Fae]

Again, hypothetically (and this one applies to same sex as well as opposite sex couples..) Can you be in love with someone and not be physically attracted to them?

[mothwench]

umm... not in my experience. that would be just loving someone, like i say i love my brother, but i'd never say i'm in love with my brother... ack... going to be sick now. :sick:

[branwen74]

I think you can, I think that you should love the persons spirit/soul and not their physical appearence,

but then again are you attracted to them(physically) because you love them, or do you love them because you are attracted to them?

[Isil Darkmoon]

I find "love" to be a very nebulous word to me, although I know my definitions vary from the norm somewhat.

I know it is possible to *LOVE* people you are not attracted to... that's what close friendship, or familial (blood or bond) love is.

Being "in love" with someone you're not attracted to is trickier... largely because I think being in love *CREATES* attraction, and the situation will balance itself one way or the other.

You can be close to someone, be attrated emotionally or mentally, without physical attraction, but I've found as the relationship continues, a physiacal attraction often *follows* as the picture rounds itself out.

Or if you're in love/in a relationship with someone, but a physical attraction never develops, it oftentimes results in the relationship shifting back to being only a close friendship and *that* form of love, instead of being "in love" with them anymore.

[Xentor]

I understand being in love as nature's way of procreating the species. So, no.

Loving someone goes a step beyond being in love. I assume us perfectly capable of loving someone for other reasons than physicial attraction.

[amberwolf]

I think you can love someone that your not physiacally attracted to but I think that you have to find the whole of them ,appearance and personality to be IN love with them..If you do not find someone physiacally attractive then in My experience it wont really work in the long term.

[angelbaby]

Well, I think that perhaps people can fall in love without regards to physical apperance, for those that are more concerned with the mind of the other person. But I think more often to really be IN love with that person, there has to be some kind of physical attration, otherwise I really don't think they will last. I don't know if this makes any sense, and I'm starting to confuse myself... :whatmewor

[Autumn]

Yes, sure... I am not very visual about it...but I love Dh dearly and wouldn't want anyone else ever...

[Morr]

I find that its rare when theres absolutely zero physical attraction between two people who are in a relationship. I think that theres usually some sort of physical attraction spark - even if its just a bit - thats there from the beginning. And later on once you get to know the person and fall IN LOVE with them - then they become more attractive to you in every way, including physically.

I was in a relationship with this absolutely amazing girl - and she was over weight. Most of my friends didnt say a word about it, but one friend was like "she's very smart & funny and all... but she's... well, fat...".. And I was like "So? She's beautiful to me in every way, I dont care how fat or thin she is."... I'll admit that in the beginning the thought did cross through my mind, however her smile was what attracted me to her, and when I got to know her - Her personality & intellegence took over and made me fall in love with her, and the physical appearance deal didnt mean anything at all to me.

If youre talking about a strictly aplatonic relationship between family members/friends - then sure, you can love your family/friends to death, yet not be attracted to them.

[Faeawyn]

Absolutely. Normally, I'm attracted to the buff athletic type. But when I met my current husband (chubby cuddly type), something about him just glowed. I was immediately drawn to him. We've been together 9 years, and I'm still crazy about him. He wonders how I could be attracted to someone like him....but I just am. I don't see the weight, I just see his spirit....and I love him.

[VelvetBlade]

I most definately think you can be in love with someone and not be physically attracted to them, though I never thought that when I was younger. There is just so much more to a great relationship than physical attraction. There's kindness and trust and respect and the never ending feeling of knowing that no matter what life throws your way, your partner will always be in your corner, and the first thing you think of every morning, and the last thing you think of every night.


~AW

[Garnet]

Of course you can. My soulmate was a gay man..we were so compatible, we'd finish each other's sentences. We weren't physically attracted to each other, but we were absolutely mad about each other.

[Boogins]

Yes... but things could be kind of dull in your spare time.

[~Shamanna~]

I think that if you're 'in love' with someone you love every aspect of that person 'warts an all'. If you 'love' someone you don't necessarily find them physically attractive.

[Flaire-FireStar]

Yes.
And to not re-state what so many others here have said, I'll keep it at that. ;)

[sweet nothings]

Yep...it is absolutaly possible

[Koehnae]

I believe you can love someone purely based on their personality.