Coming of Age/Moontime

[MystyPines]

My best friend's 12 year old daughter is coming upon her first Moontime (menarche) and I was wondering if anyone has any ideas for Pagan coming of age rites to acknowledge this special time in her life. Any ideas for symbolic actions to take place during the ritual, gifts or items to be presented to her as well as poetry. I was able to get her a clay goddess called the "Menstrual Goddess" made by a company called BellPineArtFarm.com. Any book suggestions would also be great!

http://www.bellpineartfarm.com/home/bp1/page/7/11

Bright Blessings!

[Swanspirit]

Merry merry,
and what a great thing for you to do .
I beleive that honoring a young woman at Menarche is one of the most Goddess affirming , life affirming femininity affirming things to do on this earth .
How absolutely wonderful . I belong to a yahoo club that has a wealth of resources.. called
MOONTIME the Menstrual Hut.
The omen that post there have been sharing moontime experiences , and resources for a l;ong time now , I highly recommend it , and it is for women only .( Sorry guys)
http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/moontime
There is the link......
I read an amazing Native American Ritual
for menarche once I will try and find it for you :>
HUGS
Swannie

[MystyPines]

Thank you so much Swanspirit! I agree. One of the greatest mysteries is menstruation. Woman should be revered for being able to create life! I have spoken with many of my friends (ages 36-40) regarding their first experience with their menstrual cycles and it is amazing how many of them had such negative responses from their mothers about it to the point that some of these women never told their mother they had gotten it.

[Swanspirit]

Merry Merry,
Someone once called me ( and they didnt mean it nicely I am afraid), the Queen of copy paste LOL so I humbly accept the TITLE .....
This is fromthe Ritual Hut author unkown ....


"The Apache tribes today celebrate probably the most well-known and elaborate of traditional Native American puberty rites. They usually take place around the Fourth of July each year, and people come from great distances to participate. Drumming and dancing are continuous from dawn till far into the night. The young women who are the
focus of the event are instructed by ritual song and dance in the highest values of Apache life: physical strength, good nature, prosperity, and benign old age. Symbolically, as a wish for the blessing of long life, she acquires for a short time the power of the White Painted Woman (in legend, a founder of the tribe) who possesses eternal life. According to legend, White Painted Woman achieves immortality by making a journey to the East when she reaches advanced
age. East, of course, is the direction of the rising sun, from which comes everything that is new and reborn. As White Painted Woman proceeds eastward, she sees a young girl coming toward her in the distance. And as the two women approach one another, they recognize that they are one and
the same person. The old one becomes young again, and when she once again achieves that certain time of life the whole process is repeated-and repeated again, endlessly into time."
I think that is so beautiful...... and reflective of the Maiden Mother Crone Cycle
Love and Light
Swannie

[Arduinna]

I'm so glad you started this thread! My daughter is going to be 12 soon and I've been think about this same thing.

I can't wait to hear all the great suggestions.

There are some great ones in the book Circle Round.

[Kaylara]

Check out the book Circle Round. It has some very good ideas for menarche rituals...

Kaylara

[Emy]

Mystypines, I just had to say, wow, what a beutiful menstrual goddess, I am sure your best friends daughter will love it!

Bright blessings

[MystyPines]

I will be heading to the bookstore for Circle Round, thanks for the recommendation!

[MystyPines]

In many cultures a woman's menstrual cycle is indeed a cause for celebration, for positive rituals and practices. How do you feel about menstruation? What was the first time experience like?
Positive or negative experience? Were there feelings of joy or feelings of shame? Was your mother informative and supportive?

One woman's story: "I still remember that day... I knew that one day I would start to bleed, and my friends talked about it at school but when it happened I was still shocked and scared. When I told my mother it was as if I had done something wrong. I felt like I had to hide it and she warned me that now I had to be careful not to "get into trouble" with the boys!..whatever that mean't to an eleven year old."

I would be interested to hear people's own personal stories of coming into Womynhood.

[Xois]

how about a very nice garnet and silver ring?

[MystyPines]

Xois,

That is a great idea! I just learned that Garnet and Moonstone are perfect stones for Moontime. Garnet is to help balance you during Moontime.

I came across this website and what memories it brings back. It shows Menstruation booklets that are distributed to young girls at school displaying booklets dated from 1930 to present. I remember getting one called "Growing Up and Liking It." I also remember ordering the Starter Kit, he he he, check it out:

http://www.mum.org/GULIcov.htm

[Myst]

I remember when one of my cousins hit that time she refused to acknowledge it, deciding if she didn't wear pads or anything it would just go away. Wonder if this refusal to recognize her bodily functions was part of the reason behind her getting pregnant at 13?

I remember when I found that time we went out for dinner - we weren't of any religion but it was very nice to have my mom recognize me as a woman and go out for a special "women only" dinner.

[MystyPines]

I gathered the following book list:

Blood, Bread and Roses: How Menstruation Created the World by Judy Grahn
DragonTime: Magick and Mystery of Menstruation by Luisa Francia
Honoring Menstruation: A Time of Self-Renewal (formerly called: Her Blood is Gold: Celebrating the Power of Menstruation) by Lara Owen
New Moon Rising: Reclaiming the Sacred Rites of Menstruation by Linda Heron Wind
Rites of Passage by Pauline Campanelli
Red Moon: Understanding and Using the Gifts of the Menstrual Cycle by Miranda Gray
Sister Moon Lodge: The Power and Mystery of Menstruation by Kisma K. Stepanich
Blessings of the Blood by Celu Amberston
Mysteries of the Dark Moon: The Healing Power of the Dark Goddess by Demetra George
The Wise Wound: Menstruation and Everywoman by Penelope Shuttle and Peter Redgrove
Rites of Passage: A Celebration of Menarche by Synchronicty Press (www.spress.org)

[MystyPines]

I came across this amusing tidbit while searching menstruation, got a chuckle out of it:

COULD IT BE ... SATAN?
Laurie Casterline, a "Christian counselor" in Hornell, New York, recently said in a speech that God had revealed to her that PMS was "a supernatural attack from Satan" and a part of God's curse that came from the original sin in the Garden of Eden.
And she has proof, too! "Looking at American history," the Hornell Evening Tribune reported her as saying, "women didn't play a major role until the 1900s, and that's when PMS exploded." Casterline says she overcame PMS through prayer and believes that by assuming positions of influence and stepping outside their divinely ordained traditional roles, women are opening themselves to the curse. "In the Bible, God provides answers to every difficulty people face. I'm not saying God specifically addresses PMS, but the answers are in there."
(Quoted in the Door, September/October 1997)
http://commonplacebook.com/features/satan.shtm

[seawitch]

this is great i have been looking for information on this rite of passage my daughter is going to be 11 soon and the way her shape is chinging it isn't more than a year away and i want to have it all planned out well before that way it will go smoothly
she is even looking forward to it i would like to hear how it turns out and what gifts i am thinking about a garnet or ruby ring and gifts for the elements and i think i will use campinellis rites of passage with some personal changes thanks fo the great information

[Swanspirit]

Thank you for sharing it,,,,,
and even though I am on my way to moon"pause", I still cherish my moontimes , and I still cycle .........
Women are cyclical creatures, even before and after we bleed :>
HUGS
Swannie

[MystyPines]

Swanspirit,

What is the age for menopause these days? I wonder if the age of your first menstruation plays into the menopause, such as if I started late at age 16, would I go into my 50's?

[Swanspirit]

Merry Merry,
And the difference in woman so vast.....
It is really hard to say , but I started my moontimes late, at 15, as matter of fact on my fifteenth birthday ! I thought it would never come LOL but I was very thin then and I didnt think or talk about it then because NO-ONE
did, that the lack of body fat could have delayed mine.
But every woman is so very different, and my moon pause is coming along very nicely , what with herbal and diet supplements. What I have found that in my forties was, the peri- moon-pause times are longer than I expected, but I still pay attention to my monthly cycles because even if I dont bleed there is hormonal activity changing levels, just not enough to cause actual moon blood each time :>.
Love and HUGS
Swannie

[MystyPines]

Here is a list of websites for Coming of Age rituals:

http://www.homestead.com/barbooch/menarche.html
http://www.tryskelion.com/adulthd2.htm
http://www.tryskelion.com/adulth4.htm
http://www.anisoptera.com/grimoire/comeage.htm
http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/spiritl.html#Moon
http://www.earthcircle.org/sadiemoon.html
http://www.homestar.org/bryannan/ritual.html
http://www.wicca.drak.net/ladybrid/r/cager001.html
http://www.geocities.com/paris/arc/8776/agefemale.html

[MystyPines]

Some Moontime gift ideas:

Clay Menstrual Goddess:
http://www.bellpineartfarm.com/home/bp1/page/7/11
Ritual Box for Menarche: http://www.mysticmoonpdx.com/mm_html/mm_product.html
Moontime Journal: http://www.spress.org/bookandprod.html
Moontime Bath Oil: http://www.beinggirls.co.uk/Other_Menstrual_Prods.htm
Moontime Bath: http://www.aromatherapygoddess.com/retailherbbaths.html
Moontime Goddess Oil: http://www.aromatherapygoddess.com/retailessentialoils1.html
Moontime Tea: http://www.bnatural.com/pier.htm
Moontime Herbal Bath: http://www.herbalserenity.com/page2.html
Moontime Aromatherapy Oil: http://www.mysticunicorn.com/aromatherapy.html
Honor Moon Aromatherapy Bath Kit: http://www.gsgs.com/catalog/pages/personal/personal3.html
Moontime Aromatherapy Oil: http://www.outoftheearth.com/aromapp.htm
Moontime Gift Basket: http://www.natureshopper.com/cgi-bin/webc.cgi/st_prod.html?p_prodid=67&sid=8sY3qk0GcHg6DCK
Magnificent Moontime Oil: http://www.starfloweressences.com/products_blends.html
Moontime Tea: http://members.tripod.com/~BKHerbs/teasnherbs.htm
Vulva Puppet?: http://houseochicks.com/puppetsplash.html

[MystyPines]

I found the following idea as a symbolic action to have in a coming of age ritual:

The Mother and Daughter each taking hold of a long "Red" cord (representing the umbillical cord), to the sound of beating drums as they stand facing each other, the cord is cut, and given to the daughter representing her independence and adulthood.

Red wine, red candles, even annointing her forehead with a splotch of red paint after reciting her initiation into Womanhood.

[ladyrowan]

I'm at the other end of the spectrum, and hopefully within the next few years mine will stop forever. Really looking forward to that - THEN i'll be celebrating! Hehe

BB

[MystyPines]

LadyRowan,

Then, we will start a thread for Croning rituals! :D

[ladyrowan]

Originally posted by MystyPines
LadyRowan,

Then, we will start a thread for Croning rituals! :D

8O 8O 8O

Wish they'd pick a different name for it though - don't know if it's the same where you are, but here a crone is usually associated with an ugly old hag!!! Haha

BB

[banondraig]

one of my friends had all her female relatives, her mom's friends, etc. get together. everyone brought a quilt square and they sewed the quilt together while talking about their "first times". she still has the quilt.

myself, i never had a ritual of any kind, just my mom took me over to my grandma's & they discussed how awful feminine hygiene products were when they started while i wished i could fall through the floor! lol it's a nice memory to look back to though. :)

[Flar's Freyja]

Wow, I never knew this thread was here. I started this one a while back and it died because most people seemed to miss the point:

Women's Moon Lodge (http://www.mysticwicks.com/showthread.php?t=19486&highlight=womens+moon+lodge)

[Flar's Freyja]

bumping for LunaPazFemme