Chaos Witch
June 21st, 2004, 04:57 PM
God Checker - http://www.godchecker.com/
A witty take on mythology.
Edited to add an example -
APOLLO: Greek all-rounder. The son of ZEUS and LETO, he has his Godly fingers in every pie.
Sun God. Music God. Archery God. Poetry God. Painting God. Prophecy God. Plagues and Healing God. Animal Welfare God. God of Radiance. God of Ploughing. And much much more!
Send for free brochure with no obligation. See him conduct the Holy Choir of MUSES, tickets available at the box office. Book now for Apollo Space Mission.
Also, he has undiminished Beauty and Virility. You name it, he has it. Thoroughly sickening to us mere mortals.
But he is not entirely the Mr Nice Guy he would have us believe. There are women he pursued who won’t talk due to transformation or worse. Daphne is now a laurel tree and Clytia is a sunflower.
Sudden deaths are not uncommon when he is around – and don’t try to compete with him musically. It’s all very well to be played alive but not flayed alive like poor old Marsyas. Or to be given the ears of an ass like poor old King Midas. CASSANDRA never got another chance either, nor was he very pleasant to the SIBYL-OF-CUMAE, granting her immortality but leaving out the age clause.
His son ASCLEPIUS was the result of another unfortunate lapse. Having had an affair with the mortal daughter of a king, APOLLO was consumed with jealousy when he discovered she had another suitor, and, out of control, he killed her. In a fit of remorse he was just in time to rescue her unborn child and have him brought up with the best education to be ASCLEPIUS, the Deity Doctor.
He met his match in ZEUS, and a tussle for power earned him a period in exile; but as ZEUS had zapped his son ASCLEPIUS, zapping the Cyclope thunderbolt makers seems justifiable. It can be very tough at the top and all in all APOLLO handles it very well what with ZEUS being his dad, having ARTEMIS for a twin sister, etc.
A witty take on mythology.
Edited to add an example -
APOLLO: Greek all-rounder. The son of ZEUS and LETO, he has his Godly fingers in every pie.
Sun God. Music God. Archery God. Poetry God. Painting God. Prophecy God. Plagues and Healing God. Animal Welfare God. God of Radiance. God of Ploughing. And much much more!
Send for free brochure with no obligation. See him conduct the Holy Choir of MUSES, tickets available at the box office. Book now for Apollo Space Mission.
Also, he has undiminished Beauty and Virility. You name it, he has it. Thoroughly sickening to us mere mortals.
But he is not entirely the Mr Nice Guy he would have us believe. There are women he pursued who won’t talk due to transformation or worse. Daphne is now a laurel tree and Clytia is a sunflower.
Sudden deaths are not uncommon when he is around – and don’t try to compete with him musically. It’s all very well to be played alive but not flayed alive like poor old Marsyas. Or to be given the ears of an ass like poor old King Midas. CASSANDRA never got another chance either, nor was he very pleasant to the SIBYL-OF-CUMAE, granting her immortality but leaving out the age clause.
His son ASCLEPIUS was the result of another unfortunate lapse. Having had an affair with the mortal daughter of a king, APOLLO was consumed with jealousy when he discovered she had another suitor, and, out of control, he killed her. In a fit of remorse he was just in time to rescue her unborn child and have him brought up with the best education to be ASCLEPIUS, the Deity Doctor.
He met his match in ZEUS, and a tussle for power earned him a period in exile; but as ZEUS had zapped his son ASCLEPIUS, zapping the Cyclope thunderbolt makers seems justifiable. It can be very tough at the top and all in all APOLLO handles it very well what with ZEUS being his dad, having ARTEMIS for a twin sister, etc.