It was Negative, and now I'm sad!

[MystickalMe]

I apologize if I am too forward, as I know I am new here... but I feel comfortable here, everyone is so caring!

My "Aunt Flo" is about a month late, and I have a few symptoms of pregnancy (peeing all the time, Frequent Heartburn, Always Tired) s I took 4 HPTs, at first Furious and scared, not wanting a baby. All 4 tests were negative, I should be thrilled right? My husband sure is!

I'm so depressed lately, all I can think about is babies.
My husband and I want children, bad! But financially he's sure we can't afford one, I disagree (We'd have to cut a few things out that we don't need to spend money on and I WANT to cut out anyway...)

Now before someone jumps at me telling me what a responsibility children are... I was an au pair for 2 years (A live in Nanny) to 3 children, the youngest was 4 months when I moved in and the oldest was 8. The parents were "Ghosts" as I liked to call them. The father was a business man, bank president and the mom was only concerned for spending her husbands money. I loved these kids and was there for first days of school, first steps, first words EVERYTHING! So I know how much work they are, but I also know what a pay off they are.

I suppose I am just suffering from Baby Fever... but I'm not really sure how to tell my husband how badly I want a baby... (and how I know it often takes awhile to get pregnant... it seems to get harder once you're actually trying!)

Thank you for listening...

[Hope]

(((hugs))) i am sorry you are struggling right now with this

i am glad you felt comfy talking with us though, we tend to be pretty nice ;)

love
hope

[Temair]

I'm so sorry. I remember that feeling. When I was pregnant with my first, my test said it was negative and I threw myself on my bed and sobbed for an hour. I had to take another test later to confirm that I was indeed pregnant. But I only did one the first time. If you don't get your "Aunt Flo" soon, try another test. If it is also negative, it may be stress that is causing your symptoms. Do take care of yourself and you will get through this.

[Starpixie]

I know where you're coming from. I used to suffer from baby fever bad. But chin up sweets, when the timing is right, you will be blessed with a baby. :)

[Kelley]

If you aren't pregnant right now you may want to check out some Natural Family Planning sites and start charting your daily symptoms. With NFP you can figure out the best time to somewhat plan sex to get pregnant, or avoid it if you don't want to. They can also tell you about some of the signs your body will have if you do become pregnant, which can tell you before the store test will.

Don't stress yourself out too much, it can and will throw your body out of whack quicker than anything else. Good luck.

[MystickalMe]

Thank you all so very much!!

I am feeling a little bit better today... however I'm wanting to start trying soon! (Just need hubby to come around on the idea too!)

[GaiaDea]

With the symptoms you are having, you may want to be tested for diabetes, just in case. If you know a diabetic who tests their blood sugar with a meter, PM me and I will tell you how to do a blood glucose tolerance test at home. Understand, that is not a substitute for getting a test done at the Dr.'s, but it can give you a clue about what's going on. And the Dr. will be happy to have the additional info to help diagnose with.

[soilsigh aingeal]

It could be late due to stress, change in diet, weight loss, anything, and most importantly, something could be wrong and you should see a doctor. It's also normal for women to skip a cycle so if you still haven't gotten it, i'd make an appt with a doctor.

:hugz:

[Hellenic_Witch]

I'm so sorry the tests were negative -- I know the feeling and am blessed with 3 little pumpkins (1 girl and 2 boys) ---- In response to your hubby: I know he feels you're not financially ready, but in my experience you NEVER are. There will always be financial issues, and even if you get to a point where things are more financially secure, you never know what is around the corner. I know it's cliche, but things have a way of working out. Our second child has Spina Bifida and has a lot of medical expenses, so we put off having another baby until things were "more secure". BUT, the problem was, they never seemed to get "more secure", so finally we just did it -- got tired off waiting for our finances to get in line -- and just decided to just do it. And you know what, it's been great! So now, our new baby is 18 months old, we still have bills, but at least things haven't gotten worse. It's just a matter of balancing your money, deciding what's really a priority, etc. We do splurge every now and then, we're not perfect, but we try!
It seems like the time is right for you, I can sense your longing in your posts. I would talk to your husband honestly and patiently and let him know how dear this is to you. Acknowledge his doubts and be sincere. That's what worked for me!!!

[Flutterby_whispers]

I just wanted to send you hugs ... I remember that feeling all too well ((((hugs))))

[Llewyth]

Rasberry leaf tea! 3 cups a day! Works wonders!

[TWILIGHTSKY]

:hugz: It took us nine months of trying before we concieved, and I cried after each flow started- I felt like there was something terribly wrong with me! But when the time is right you will come with child- you just need the right egg to ripen!

I've been really tired lately, too; cravings and crankiness being part of the deal, but I just had my period- hmmm, do you live in New York? Methinks we have a crappy state epidemic in the works!

[Mab]

Oh sweetie!! I totally understand how you feel. I've been in a similar situation off & on for years now....logic saying "good....it's terrible timing, etc" but this huge part of you getting very sad b/c it's what you want....

You should definitely talk to your husband about it. Just start a dialogue.

Hugs & good luck, honey.

[MystickalMe]

Thank you ladies!!

As far as it being something else... My doctor told me "Sorry to upset you, but you are perfectly fine!" (I was intent that SOMETHING was wrong with me!)

So as for my Dear Husband, he is coming around to the idea of having a child!! (Especially since We just officially got completely out of debt, except for a house payment!)

[Strega Del Vento]

I can definitely understand your sadness and frustration. Before my husband and I were married, I found out I was pregnant. There was a lot of surprise, frustration (we didn't understand how it could have happened, as we were always protected), and confusion on how we were going to handle it. Once we accepted it, and became extremely overjoyed about the impending arrival, I was rushed to the ER with bleeding and severe pains. They thought it was nothing, just some bleeding, and regular pregnancy pains. Two days later, I went back in and they found after an ultrasound, that the pregnancy was an ectopic (tubal). Luckily, it termed itself out when it did (I was 2 1/2 months). I was told that if it had gone further, it would have ruptured, killing me. Words can't describe the sadness felt by me and my hubby. We truly wanted the baby.

After we were married, We started trying. We figured that the pregnancy before we were married was just not the right time, and it wasn't meant to be. It took us 6 months before we finally conceived. I remember getting pregnancy tests every single month, and getting horribly disappointed each time. The 6th month, we had decided to "stop" trying, and let it happen on its own, if it was going to. That's when it did happen.

Very good post, Sidhe. I think you made a very valid point.

No one is ever financially "ready" for a baby. There are always bills, necessities, and unexpected expenses that pop up. There's always some kind of struggle with finances, children or not. We still struggle, even though my husband and I make more than enough money.

I am so glad to hear that your husband is coming around! This is great news! I'm especially glad that he's taking your desire seriously and is supporting you. I wish you the best of luck! Keep us posted.

;)

[Kalika]

:hugz:

It'll happen when the time is right for you sweetie... don't worry!

I'm glad you felt comfortable sharing your thoughts.

[MystickalMe]

Thank you all!!!

Hopefully soon we will start "full fledged" trying!! Although now I've caught a terrible cold and want to wait it out :( Missed my shot for this month