Dria El
August 15th, 2001, 08:45 PM
Just another something someone sent me awhile back that I thought you may get something out of... Enjoy!
Just another tale of how to become a Witch!
SO...how many REAL Witches do you know? Me...not many really...but I feel linked with all of them in a special way that only another Wiccan can know. I didn't always feel that way though...I was lost for a long time. A VERY long time.
I grew up in the "Bible Belt" of the USA. For anyone who doesn't know what that is...that is basically an area of the US that has a church on every corner, and the best things to do on a Friday night are go to a church social of one type or another.
My Dad is a minister of one of these churches...I will leave off the name/denomination...cause I am not ashamed...but rather...those things aren't really important to me any more. Mom is the typical housewife/minister's wife/mother/carpool advisor...etc.... LOL My house was a pretty happy one really. There weren't any harsh words, or punishments that I didn't deserve.
EXCEPT...I was forced to go to church with the family every Sunday to "repent" & hopefully save my evil, wicked soul from damnation. Yeah I know...there are lots of good people out there that would say..."That isn't a punishment". But to me it was.
You see, I never really felt loved by the Christian God. I felt confused mostly and more than a little uncomfortable. I mean Dad was awsome at the pulpit....he preached the "fire & brimstone" that surely awaited all normal mortals when we died. But for some reason...even with all his teachings...I never really "got" it. WHY when this God loves me SO much, will he surely send me to a hell that is so...hellish?? Is there NOTHING I can do to prevent this from happening? Is it not human nature to be vain, at least on occasion? To want what our neighbor has, sometimes? To sometimes in our frustration, take his name in vain? These things & others like...WHY would He create me in his image...but when I fail to be the perfect specimen...send me to hell? Yes I can pray...but isn't there something that I personally can do here & now...to make my prayers come true?
See? I was FULL of questions...but Dad was never really able to help me out. My other MAIN question was...WHAT makes Dad so much better than my mother? What makes HIM the all supreme one in our house? Why did Mom cook, clean, & take care of us kids all the time when all Dad had to do was sit & read the Bible...and occasionally take care of disciplining us when we stepped out of line?
Maybe that isn't the way it is in your family...but that is how it was with mine. And to this day...still is. My mother is always on her feet while his feet are always the ottoman.
So...back to my tale...
Like I said...my childhood was peaceful from day to day..but when Sunday rolled around I would get antsy...anticipating the inevitable lack of comfort in the Church. I glided smoothly from elementary school into Junior High...attending all the right functions & avoiding the wrong ones. High school came along & I cracked down on my books. I wanted to get out of the house...& if a scholorship to colledge would do that...FINE WITH ME!!! lol
I graduated and went to school. I met a man and we married...I got my degree...but by that time I had my first child on the way...so instead of diving into the work force of America...I jumped from colledge straight into Mommyhood.
Those first few years were absolutely a few of the happiest of my life. My husband wasn't particularly into a religion, so we didn't attend church. After a few years my Daughter got a brother. I was becoming my mother without knowing it. LOL I was running to T-Ball, cooking, cleaning & nursing a sick child here and there. My husband was working long hours at the office, coming home & falling straight to sleep. After my son began school, I got a little antsy. I wanted to put my hard earned degree to work for me & my family. I wanted to be out in the world.
We discussed it, my husband and I, but something seemed to always be in the way of me going to work. Time passed and I got the call one day that Mother had died. Hard work...little rest & a TON of responsibilities that she had taken on at the church to make up for her children being gone from home had given her a heart attack. She was only 56.
I attended my mother's funeral...my children and I...my husband had to "work". LOL As I sat there watching my fathers best Friends come up & say what a wonderful wife my mother was...I honestly thought to myself...WHAT ELSE WAS SHE???? She was more than a wife surely. More than a mother. But WHAT ELSE?
I went home with the normal feelings of loss, and more than my share of a sense of "What Else". I decided about a month later that I would be a little more. I couldn't let my family become my identity. I began working. A small part time job, that helped me be who I was and that also let me keep up with the family type chores.
After about a year, my husband came to me & said...I can't handle this. You have to quit work. Handle what I asked? That I work? That sometimes YOU have to fix dinner? No it wasn't really all those things that he had had to take up the slack on when I began to work. It was another woman. We divorced. Slightly less than civil, but we divorced.
I began to pick up the pieces of my life one by one. There wasn't a lot of child support, so I had to work full time. Over the course of time the kids entered High School one by one...as they tend to do eventually. I happened to run across a few references one day when I was helping my daughter research a report on the Salem Witchcraft trials. These references intrigued me. Wicca...Wiccans...Witches. Witches are real??? PUH LEESE!! Everyone knows that witches are a thing to scare young children with...OR Satanic groups with nothing but horrible thoughts on thier minds.
But I was seriously interested. I wondered what sort of people professed to be a Witch? I began digging...and turning up all types of books, and other sources for my search. My daughter thought it was cool & she helped me alot. We began looking into this more & more & more. Eventually my daughter came to me one day & all excited said, " I FOUND one Mom!!! Right here in town!!!" Of course that was a little vague but after some rambling I finally discovered what ONE she had found...a Witch. She ran the local oddity shop, selling things like pretty candles...the odd bath oil here & there...and she had the BEST garden in town.
MY daughter and I asked to meet with her. She was wonderful. I laugh sometimes cause my daughter and I, who THOUGHT we were experts by now on this subject, pelted her with a ton of questions. She answered all that she could...and if she didn't know the answer...simply said in a mysterious way...I don't know...maybe we kind find out together? LOL After several meetings My daughter and I were beginning to love this woman and we wanted to be a part of her life.
Over a few more years we became friends and things slowly seemed to get older. Me, my children and our Dearest friend. My daughter now went off to colledge and my Son was soon to go too.
One day, my friend...the witch...(lol) came to me and told me that she wanted to show me some things around her shop. I reluctantly agreed and things were set up. Over those days she showed me how to do several things that she said I would need to know. I became so ingrossed in her teachings that I didn't realize she was loosing weight rapidly & that the lessons had gone beyond "just a few things".
Eventually I woke up from my little mind slumber...(I have always wondered if there wasn't SOME influence there on her part, but she meant well) And took stock of what was happening around me. I KNEW things that I didn't know before. Like about plants and candles and numerous other things. And I notice for the first time that my dearest friend....for that is what she was now...was not all well. When I confronted her about it...she said...all will be fine.
Over time I was brought to the Wiccan religion slowly, by her, I had come to feel at home with her & all these things about her. She took me under her wing and she showed me what she could. What she couldn't show me I found in books. It seemed like such a natural progression for me. Of course my daughter asked me what took me so long when I told her. My son said bout time you came out about it...Everyone in town has been saying you were a witch for years.
Remember all those questions about the Christian God that I had asked as a child? Well, I now have MY answers. Maybe these aren't right for everyone...but they feel right to me. And in my own mind...that is basically what matters. My dearest friend died a year ago now, just after she bought me this computer as a "gift". LOL The old witch KNEW what she was doing huh? At least I like to think so. Maybe she knew she was going to die soon, and wanted to link me up with others like me...for there are very few here, My children and myself are all that I know...other than online.
Even though I haven't been a witch long (under 10 years)...I have made some friends...and lost some friends. But all in all I am happy now. I am a Witch!
Just another tale of how to become a Witch!
SO...how many REAL Witches do you know? Me...not many really...but I feel linked with all of them in a special way that only another Wiccan can know. I didn't always feel that way though...I was lost for a long time. A VERY long time.
I grew up in the "Bible Belt" of the USA. For anyone who doesn't know what that is...that is basically an area of the US that has a church on every corner, and the best things to do on a Friday night are go to a church social of one type or another.
My Dad is a minister of one of these churches...I will leave off the name/denomination...cause I am not ashamed...but rather...those things aren't really important to me any more. Mom is the typical housewife/minister's wife/mother/carpool advisor...etc.... LOL My house was a pretty happy one really. There weren't any harsh words, or punishments that I didn't deserve.
EXCEPT...I was forced to go to church with the family every Sunday to "repent" & hopefully save my evil, wicked soul from damnation. Yeah I know...there are lots of good people out there that would say..."That isn't a punishment". But to me it was.
You see, I never really felt loved by the Christian God. I felt confused mostly and more than a little uncomfortable. I mean Dad was awsome at the pulpit....he preached the "fire & brimstone" that surely awaited all normal mortals when we died. But for some reason...even with all his teachings...I never really "got" it. WHY when this God loves me SO much, will he surely send me to a hell that is so...hellish?? Is there NOTHING I can do to prevent this from happening? Is it not human nature to be vain, at least on occasion? To want what our neighbor has, sometimes? To sometimes in our frustration, take his name in vain? These things & others like...WHY would He create me in his image...but when I fail to be the perfect specimen...send me to hell? Yes I can pray...but isn't there something that I personally can do here & now...to make my prayers come true?
See? I was FULL of questions...but Dad was never really able to help me out. My other MAIN question was...WHAT makes Dad so much better than my mother? What makes HIM the all supreme one in our house? Why did Mom cook, clean, & take care of us kids all the time when all Dad had to do was sit & read the Bible...and occasionally take care of disciplining us when we stepped out of line?
Maybe that isn't the way it is in your family...but that is how it was with mine. And to this day...still is. My mother is always on her feet while his feet are always the ottoman.
So...back to my tale...
Like I said...my childhood was peaceful from day to day..but when Sunday rolled around I would get antsy...anticipating the inevitable lack of comfort in the Church. I glided smoothly from elementary school into Junior High...attending all the right functions & avoiding the wrong ones. High school came along & I cracked down on my books. I wanted to get out of the house...& if a scholorship to colledge would do that...FINE WITH ME!!! lol
I graduated and went to school. I met a man and we married...I got my degree...but by that time I had my first child on the way...so instead of diving into the work force of America...I jumped from colledge straight into Mommyhood.
Those first few years were absolutely a few of the happiest of my life. My husband wasn't particularly into a religion, so we didn't attend church. After a few years my Daughter got a brother. I was becoming my mother without knowing it. LOL I was running to T-Ball, cooking, cleaning & nursing a sick child here and there. My husband was working long hours at the office, coming home & falling straight to sleep. After my son began school, I got a little antsy. I wanted to put my hard earned degree to work for me & my family. I wanted to be out in the world.
We discussed it, my husband and I, but something seemed to always be in the way of me going to work. Time passed and I got the call one day that Mother had died. Hard work...little rest & a TON of responsibilities that she had taken on at the church to make up for her children being gone from home had given her a heart attack. She was only 56.
I attended my mother's funeral...my children and I...my husband had to "work". LOL As I sat there watching my fathers best Friends come up & say what a wonderful wife my mother was...I honestly thought to myself...WHAT ELSE WAS SHE???? She was more than a wife surely. More than a mother. But WHAT ELSE?
I went home with the normal feelings of loss, and more than my share of a sense of "What Else". I decided about a month later that I would be a little more. I couldn't let my family become my identity. I began working. A small part time job, that helped me be who I was and that also let me keep up with the family type chores.
After about a year, my husband came to me & said...I can't handle this. You have to quit work. Handle what I asked? That I work? That sometimes YOU have to fix dinner? No it wasn't really all those things that he had had to take up the slack on when I began to work. It was another woman. We divorced. Slightly less than civil, but we divorced.
I began to pick up the pieces of my life one by one. There wasn't a lot of child support, so I had to work full time. Over the course of time the kids entered High School one by one...as they tend to do eventually. I happened to run across a few references one day when I was helping my daughter research a report on the Salem Witchcraft trials. These references intrigued me. Wicca...Wiccans...Witches. Witches are real??? PUH LEESE!! Everyone knows that witches are a thing to scare young children with...OR Satanic groups with nothing but horrible thoughts on thier minds.
But I was seriously interested. I wondered what sort of people professed to be a Witch? I began digging...and turning up all types of books, and other sources for my search. My daughter thought it was cool & she helped me alot. We began looking into this more & more & more. Eventually my daughter came to me one day & all excited said, " I FOUND one Mom!!! Right here in town!!!" Of course that was a little vague but after some rambling I finally discovered what ONE she had found...a Witch. She ran the local oddity shop, selling things like pretty candles...the odd bath oil here & there...and she had the BEST garden in town.
MY daughter and I asked to meet with her. She was wonderful. I laugh sometimes cause my daughter and I, who THOUGHT we were experts by now on this subject, pelted her with a ton of questions. She answered all that she could...and if she didn't know the answer...simply said in a mysterious way...I don't know...maybe we kind find out together? LOL After several meetings My daughter and I were beginning to love this woman and we wanted to be a part of her life.
Over a few more years we became friends and things slowly seemed to get older. Me, my children and our Dearest friend. My daughter now went off to colledge and my Son was soon to go too.
One day, my friend...the witch...(lol) came to me and told me that she wanted to show me some things around her shop. I reluctantly agreed and things were set up. Over those days she showed me how to do several things that she said I would need to know. I became so ingrossed in her teachings that I didn't realize she was loosing weight rapidly & that the lessons had gone beyond "just a few things".
Eventually I woke up from my little mind slumber...(I have always wondered if there wasn't SOME influence there on her part, but she meant well) And took stock of what was happening around me. I KNEW things that I didn't know before. Like about plants and candles and numerous other things. And I notice for the first time that my dearest friend....for that is what she was now...was not all well. When I confronted her about it...she said...all will be fine.
Over time I was brought to the Wiccan religion slowly, by her, I had come to feel at home with her & all these things about her. She took me under her wing and she showed me what she could. What she couldn't show me I found in books. It seemed like such a natural progression for me. Of course my daughter asked me what took me so long when I told her. My son said bout time you came out about it...Everyone in town has been saying you were a witch for years.
Remember all those questions about the Christian God that I had asked as a child? Well, I now have MY answers. Maybe these aren't right for everyone...but they feel right to me. And in my own mind...that is basically what matters. My dearest friend died a year ago now, just after she bought me this computer as a "gift". LOL The old witch KNEW what she was doing huh? At least I like to think so. Maybe she knew she was going to die soon, and wanted to link me up with others like me...for there are very few here, My children and myself are all that I know...other than online.
Even though I haven't been a witch long (under 10 years)...I have made some friends...and lost some friends. But all in all I am happy now. I am a Witch!