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Windigo
August 24th, 2004, 01:08 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?

How many did your parents have?

I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?

How is your personality a factor in family size?

I'm just rattling off questions now, but you see what I'm wanting, right?

Let's discuss family size. It will be interesting.

I have a desire to have a big family w/ both natural born & adopted children. But I'd probably only have 1 because after childbirth i probably won't want to do it again :). My parents have seven children. There were also two miscarriages.

Cev'aq
August 24th, 2004, 01:14 PM
My husband and I don't want any more children. We have a son, five years old, but I think it would've been a lot better if we'd waited to have children.

I'm an only child, and I preferred it that way.

Yes, my relatives (but not my parents) always ask when I'm going to have another... It's pressure of a sort, but it has absolutely no influence in my decision to not have other children.

My personality, and the personality of my husband are a huge factor in our family-size decisions. Neither of us wants or needs the responsibility of a second child.

Sylvan
August 24th, 2004, 01:17 PM
None. Though I think I would be ok with adopting an older child. I'm not good with little kids, they have so much energy! :foh:

But yeah, I don't plan on having any.

I am the oldest of three girls. My mom was one of eight siblings (nine if you count the one stillborn), and my dad was one of three (four if you count *that* stillborn).

My hubby is the oldest of two. His mom was one of three, and his dad was one of two, I think.

My family isn't pressuring us to have any. My sisters both have kids, and that's fine. Hubby's parents, however, are kinda wistful for a grandchild. No pressure, but as it looks like hubby's sister doesn't want kids either, they're kinda stuck watching the family line die off. *shrug* Name is carried on by a cousin, so I guess that's ok.

Personality wise... is a big factor. One, I don't feel like enough of an adult to be responsible for another human being's growth and well-being. Two, having a kid would put a serious cramp in the lifestyle we live. We wouldn't be able to just go and do the stuff we do. Our camping/mountain biking/rafting vacation trip we took would have never happened. Maybe that's "selfish", as I hear so often. So be it. :whatgives:

Amethyst Rose
August 24th, 2004, 01:17 PM
There are times when I don't want any more kids (like when the baby's having a grump day, or just won't cooperate). :) But mostly I want one more, so my son has someone to grow up with. I have two (half) sisters, one of which I grew up with and we're fairly close. My family asks me once in a while when I'll be having another, but there's no pressure.

Edit: I missed the personality question. My entire life I've known I wanted to be a mom. When I was a kid I thought I would have 3 or 4 kids. After meeting my husband however, we decided on two kids. After having one kid and it turning out to be much harder than I ever imagined (and discovering that I have a very short temper when I'm sleep deprived), I know that I'll only be able to handle one more. I just wouldn't have the patience for more than two at a time. :)

Calyx
August 24th, 2004, 01:18 PM
I wanted 2 girls, and I got 2 girls. I won't be having any more, because I had the equipment yanked. :rotfl:
Two is a good number. My mom had 9 brothers and sisters, and my dad was one of two.
My parents adopted 2 kids, myself and my brother.
Two is a good number.:) I wouldn't want more because I think I would go insane if I had more than what I do now. I'm not patient enough. Perhaps I'm not mature enough, who knows?
Personally, I don't know how families can afford to have a large number of kids from a financial standpoint--they're expensive! But worth every penny...

Rockprincess
August 24th, 2004, 01:19 PM
This is something we talk about a lot, as my husband and I are just trying to start a family now.

I grew up with 3 siblings, he grew up with 2. I think we should have 4 kids, he thinks we should have 3 :lol: We'll see. Maybe after 3, I'll run screaming at the thought of a 4th!

It does seem to me that the number you grew up with is the number you think is nice. Except for single children - most single children say that they wouldn't want their child to be as lonely as they were.

Athena-Nadine
August 24th, 2004, 01:20 PM
I often say that I'd like two or three, but as I don't have any children yet, I can't really say. I have two brothers and two sisters. My fiance has four brothers and three sisters. The only real influence that's had on our preferences for children is that neither one of us wants any children we have to grow up without any siblings at all. Seeing as how I'm 31 and he's 36, we probably won't have more than two--either naturally or by adoption.

Bainidhe Dub
August 24th, 2004, 01:20 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why? None. *shrugs* for various reasons.

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why? None. Same as above lol.

How many did your parents have? I would be the oldest of three. Only girl. So I guess that makes a total of three *laughs*

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives? *nods* Actually they keep telling me that I'll have children, and that it's wrong for a woman to not want to have them. *shrugs*

Smiley Girl
August 24th, 2004, 01:39 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?
I want 3 kids :) It's a nice round number for me. I think 2 isn't enough, but that 4 is too many. :kooky:

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?
I'll have 3, hopefully. :D

How many did your parents have?
My parents had ... well, my MOM had 4. Two with my dad and two with my older brother and sister's dad.

I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.
Well, my dad had 6 sisters... then my mom had 4 kids, her mom had 4 as well... I'm not sure. I don't think it depends totally on how many kids your parents had, just on how you were raised to look at the situation or your past experiences.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?
Not at all. If I had no kids or 99 kids my family (but for me and my husband) has no influence. :)

How is your personality a factor in family size?
Well, I've always been particular. I mean, like I explained: If I had 2 kids, I'd feel like having another one. If I had 3 I wouldn't want another one because it would be too crowded! Not to say that if I did per chance HAVE another one I wouldn't want it, I just wouldn't plan on it. (Hubby wants us to have quintuplets... ouch!)

I'm just rattling off questions now, but you see what I'm wanting, right?
Indeed I do.

Let's discuss family size. It will be interesting.
But we already did!

I have a desire to have a big family w/ both natural born & adopted children.
Good for you!

But I'd probably only have 1 because after childbirth i probably won't want to do it again :). My parents have seven children. There were also two miscarriages.

Do you think your mom and dad would have had 9 children, if there had been no miscarriages?

Tsuchimaru
August 24th, 2004, 01:40 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why? None.

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why? None.

How many did your parents have? Three.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives? Maybe?

Zoritsa_Nepenthe
August 24th, 2004, 01:53 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why? Would love to have three or four.I've always wanted a large family

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?Just the two I have.My second pregnancy was scary all throughout and I ended up with an emergency c-section.

How many did your parents have?Two

I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?No.I'd have as many as I wanted regardless of what family said.

How is your personality a factor in family size?Not sure my personality plays a role in size.

I'm just rattling off questions now, but you see what I'm wanting, right?

Let's discuss family size. It will be interesting.

I had always wished there were more then just my sister and I.I see my Dad's family close knit(he was 5th in a family of 6)and my Mother's family is fairly close(she is 1st in a family of 5).But since the c-section,there is no way I'm going through another pregnancy,and adoption is out because my husband feels a childless couple should be blessed with a child since we have already been blessed.

Shanti
August 24th, 2004, 01:56 PM
Relatives never played a part in my desisions to have any kids.
My moms side had small familys and my dads side had large familys.

I didnt plan on kids till I desided I wanted a child. Each one was like that. I desided as I went along. Thats why there is a 20 yr gap between the oldest 3 and yongest 2.

Tzhebee
August 24th, 2004, 01:57 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?
More...I don't know how many yet...just that I want at least 1 more. I guess it will depend on who I have them with and how well we can afford kids.

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why? I currently have 2. I will absolutely have at least 1 more. Hopefully 2 or 3 more.

How many did your parents have?
I'm my dad's only child, but my mom has 3, and I grew up with one brother and one sister.
My dad came from a family of 4 (two of each) and my mom came from a family of 3 (all girls). But my papa Ken has 17 brothers and sisters...that is just a little much. :collapse:

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?
I don't care what my relatives think. The only limit I have is being able to provide for them.

zehava
August 24th, 2004, 01:58 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?

i REALLY wanted 3, i don't know why, it just seemed to be a good numer :)

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?

i have 2 and i'm DONE!! why? because my son, as sweet as he is and no matter how much i love him, he's a handful and then some. he's a GOOD kid, but man, i can't imagine having any younger children to look after while he's in the house ;) that, and i nearly died after giving birth to him (so worth it though, but scarey enough to make me not ever want to do THAT again).

How many did your parents have?

2 - my brother and i

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?

hehe - only if you listen to them ;)

How is your personality a factor in family size?

i think you just have to have a pretty patient personality to have a bunch of kidlets. i'm pretty patient with two, but start to lose that when i have more than 4 in the house (friends of the munchkins, etc). just too many little people tugging at just me... ack!

-z

Aowyn
August 24th, 2004, 02:00 PM
I want 3, I will probobly have 2 and my parents had 6. My parents would like us to have several but I'm hoping to get more situated before we have a second. Maybe get a few years behind us and into a house or at the very least a bigger apartment.
I don't feel any pressure though. I love kids alot and would like to have a whole herd of them if I had the money but the numbers I gave above are more realistic. Personally I am a middle child the exact middle cause one of my siblings died very young. I loved having brothers and sisters, and have even "adopted" a friend of ours as an extra uncle for my boy since the friend is an only child and will never get to be an uncle unless he marrys a chick with siblings who have kids. He is suprised how much he likes it.

Cinnamon Girl
August 24th, 2004, 02:24 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why? Right now my husband and I are planning to start trying for our first. I'm just going to wait and see how we feel after that before planning anymore, although I would like to have more than one.

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why? Probably two - I wouldn't want to have a child grow up by themselves and I couldn't afford (or have the patience) for more than two, I don't think.

How many did your parents have? I have a complicated family situation, but the easy answer is I grew up with one brother.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives? No, that doesn't really factor into it. My in-laws have been after me for about five years to have a baby but this is my life, not theirs.

How is your personality a factor in family size? I'm not a person who just loves children just for the fact that they're children and I'm not the most patient person in the world, so it would probably be better for me to have a small family.

*Rain*
August 24th, 2004, 02:26 PM
I'm the youngest of 5 plus one that was miscarried. We grew up very close to my 4 cousins (lived in the next street), so there was always loads of us in the house. We didn't go on holiday together, we staged a small invasion. I loved the company and would have hated to be an only child. I am also a stereotypical youngest child.

My former fiance was also one of 5 and we wanted half a football team at least. We're not together anymore so guess it depends on the next person I decide to settle down with. I could see myself with minimum 3, but more if possible. I think it depends a lot more on your financial situation these days as it used to. I wouldn't want half a dozen kids if I couldn't provide for them properly.

soilsigh aingeal
August 24th, 2004, 02:31 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?
I have two and as of right now, I don't want any more. I have made a pact with myself that if I am not in a relationship that is fulfilling and myself and anyone I may be with at the time wants one, than I am getting my tubes tied when I'm 30. That's seven years. I just don't want to have been done and over with the diaper stage and have to go through it all again unless I'm with someone that I really love and who I know really loves me and we both want a baby. Does anyone think that this is a crazy idea because I've gotten a lot of weird looks from saying that.
Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?
see above. If I do have more, in that case, I would consider even two more.
How many did your parents have?
My mom and dad have five children
I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.
I people do half. My sisters each have two and my brother has three, one of which came from a previous relationship on his wife's part, My grandmother on my dad's side had 10 children and my grandfather had at least one previously. My grandmother had 5 and her mother had 10-12. My cousins all have 2-4 Plus, from what I hear, it was cheaper to have kids back then. So now with the costs of all the necessities to have children, I think the result is that the average family is limiting the number of children. Not to mention that sex was strictly for breeding at one time and now we've got these cool things called contraceptives and poeple are having fun sex now instead of baby sex now :lol:
Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?
Not in my case
How is your personality a factor in family size?
I honestly don't think I can handle more than 2 small children at a time. I'm very impatient and I procrastinate and that's just not a good thing to do with kids.

Windigo
August 24th, 2004, 02:51 PM
Do you think your mom and dad would have had 9 children, if there had been no miscarriages?

I wouldn't hold it past them, lol. I'm not so sure they would have stopped if they'd stayed together :lol: Fear the Foster household, land of a thousand children! :lol:

Temair
August 24th, 2004, 03:37 PM
I always wanted 6 kids or more. I've always known that my purpose in life is to be a mom, and that I am happiest when I can devote my life to them. I currently have 4 girls, 3 of which are my husband's, one from a previous marriage. I am the oldest of 3. My folks planned on just two, but my youngest brother came up as a birthday surprise. My mom is the youngest of 5 (one died at 3 months or so), and my Dad is 2nd of 4 (one was born after all the others grew up and died at age 5). I haven't decided whether I am going to have any more or not. We really can't afford the 4 we have, and the youngest, although planned, upped her schedule and decided to be born a year early, throwing all our plans down the drain financially. I had just quit for a new job, that fell through, then I couldn't find another because I was pregnant. But now I am a stay-at-home, and when I start working from home (hopefully soon), we will start discussing when to have another. I always wanted a herd of children, and I still do. The only pressure I get from my family is "You're having *another*?" But I don't care what they think. It's not their family, it's mine.

Holly Ariadna
August 24th, 2004, 04:04 PM
I want 4 kids, I think, maybe 5.

I think I'll have between 3 and 5 kids.

My dad had 3 kids and my mom had 1, me. I love having brothers and I want my kids to have a lot of siblings, especially since my brothers only have one daughter each. ;)

RogueSpirit
August 24th, 2004, 06:34 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?

One... because I don't think it's very responsible to have more children than you can afford or have the patience to deal with.


Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?

I have one and I'm very careful about not having any more. Again, I think it's irresponsible to have more than you can afford or have the patience to deal with. I'm at my limit. Also, having had the one, I know how uncomfortable pregnancy was for me. I had morning sickness literally through my whole pregnancy, it added significantly to my joint pain, and I am seriously concerned about another pregnancy possibly crippling me.


How many did your parents have?

Three... one girl and two boys. My mother claims she wanted a dozen. And quite frankly, that line of thinking is where I got the idea of having no more than I can afford or have patience for. My parents had more than they should have. And wanted more.


I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.

Well, I'm from a family of three... I have one, the older of my two brothers has three, and the youngest doesn't have any (that we know of). My dad is one of five (whole) or one of eight (whole and half)... the oldest had four, he had three, third had none, fourth had two, fifth had three, sixth died before he had any, seventh I don't know, and eighth had one. My mom is also one of eight (whole)... the oldest had two, she had three, third had two, fourth had one, fifth had one, sixth had none, seventh had three, and eighth died with none that we know of.


Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?

Not for me, but I've never been one to be influenced much by others.


How is your personality a factor in family size?

Well... I'm an introvert who could easily be a recluse. I desired a child, but I prefer to be alone than around a lot of people. I just wouldn't have the patience for it... and the fact that my child is a very boisterous extrovert doesn't help much

Is that what you had in mind?

Bec_W
August 24th, 2004, 06:38 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?

How many did your parents have?

I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?

How is your personality a factor in family size?

I'm just rattling off questions now, but you see what I'm wanting, right?

Let's discuss family size. It will be interesting.

I have a desire to have a big family w/ both natural born & adopted children. But I'd probably only have 1 because after childbirth i probably won't want to do it again :). My parents have seven children. There were also two miscarriages.

All tolled I've probably got more then seven blood related siblings. I only want one or two kids and if I can have bio kids that's how many I'll have, otherwise I'd be happy to adopt one or two :lol:

I'm very influenced by the number of siblings I have when it comes to the number of children I want. There's no family pressure though, unless you count my mother, who, when she's pretending to be interested, pushes for us to have kids now now now!

~~Vampy's~~Boo~~
August 24th, 2004, 07:18 PM
i have 2 already wouldnt mind having one more maybe 2 but that is pushing it medically my Dr. dont even want me to have one more much less 2 more lol but i will have atleast one more and he will just have to deal with it!!!!!!! :hmmmmm: ;)

Faeawyn
August 24th, 2004, 08:06 PM
I have 2. I would have liked to have had more because I always wanted a large family...but to have had more kids would have taken away from the opportunities I was financially able to provide my present two. I agree, it's not fair to have more children when you don't have the financial means to provide for them....especially if it takes away from the children you already have.

My mother came from a family of 7 siblings, my father has a brother.

My family history had no bearings what-so-ever in my decisions about having children. It was time and money. Now that I can afford to have more, my kids are 16 and 11 and just becoming independent. It's a wonderful thing :clapping: and I don't want to start all over again :lol:

Kalika
August 24th, 2004, 08:39 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why? 2. Because for my husband and I, its the perfect number. :)

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why? 2. Same reason as above.

How many did your parents have? My mom has 3, my sister has 3, my grandmother had 4, other grandmother had 6 :p Hubby's mom has 3, his sisters have 3 & 5, grandmother had 2

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives? No... their philosophy seems to be the more the merrier!

How is your personality a factor in family size? I don't know... both hubby and I can be very outgoing in the right situations... but are mostly quiet and enjoy being outdoors or in each others company.

ivygarland
August 24th, 2004, 09:05 PM
I always wanted 3, a boy and then identical twin girls. That's what I always wanted. My husband wants two. If we don't get twins, then we will probably just have two.

We currently have a boy, 1, and will be TTC starting next summer for #2 (and maybe#3!!!)

My mom is an only, my dad is youngest of 2 boys. My husband is oldest of 5, his dad is 3rd of 14. his mom is oldest of 8.

I think that being an only child myself (on my mom's side, although 1 of 5 on dad's, I lived only with my mom), I wanted more in my family, although I never wanted more than 3. Being one of so many, my husband wanted 1 or 2. The family's haven't started any pressure, as we don't have more or less than any body is happy with, and I doubt that we will.

Haruka2077
August 24th, 2004, 09:47 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?
I think I would like three altogether- one or two natural, one or two adopted (one or the other so it adds up to 3).

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?
Well, I'm definitely having at least one! *chuckle* After that, I suppose it will really depend on how I feel with the first one.


How many did your parents have?
Two, unfortunately. But then, they had my brother first, so I guess they had to keep going if they wanted a good one!

My family influenced not only my ideal family size, but its composition. When I was growing up, we were the family that took people in. As a result, I feel very strongly about adopting. I'm glad that my husband and I are having at least one child of our own, but that will probably be sufficient. After that I'd like to open my home to kids who are already here.

Kalika
August 24th, 2004, 10:09 PM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?
I think I would like three altogether- one or two natural, one or two adopted (one or the other so it adds up to 3).

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?
Well, I'm definitely having at least one! *chuckle* After that, I suppose it will really depend on how I feel with the first one.


How many did your parents have?
Two, unfortunately. But then, they had my brother first, so I guess they had to keep going if they wanted a good one!

My family influenced not only my ideal family size, but its composition. When I was growing up, we were the family that took people in. As a result, I feel very strongly about adopting. I'm glad that my husband and I are having at least one child of our own, but that will probably be sufficient. After that I'd like to open my home to kids who are already here.

I agree, I'd love to adopt, especially as I'm adopted myself. :) Planning on doing it later after our own children are older, and we are financially and emotionally ready to take on that responsibility.

FlyingBear
August 25th, 2004, 01:56 AM
[QUOTE=Windigo]How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?

~It really depends on the day and how Sophia is. There are days when I really want another one. And then there are days, like lately with all the teething, when I wonder why I even wanted one! :hehehehe: ~

Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?

~Probably just Sophia. Seabhac has been snipped. Although we have decided that if we *REALLY* want to inflict this sort of insanity on ourselves again, we'd look into a donor.~


How many did your parents have?

~ That survived, just my sister and I.~

I am wondering about the influence the size of our families as children have on the number of chidren we want to have.

Do you think there is a limit on the size of your family because of pressure from relatives?

~ Nope.~

Chibi-Fallon
August 25th, 2004, 02:12 AM
How many kids do you REALLY want? Why?
None. Maybe it just comes with the gay scene of not many people having kids or something. That and I know I don't like them for extended periods of time. I don't feel that it's expected of me like a heterosexual would either and I think that's part of it.


Now, how many do you think you'll have (or how many have you decided to have)? Why?
Since I'm a lesbian probably none, since I can't just up and have one and the condom can't break or anything.


How many did your parents have?
To quote Hard Day's Night "everyone's entitled to two." Even though Paul was talking about his other Grandfather. It still comes out to be the same number either way. And yes I do know that off the top of my head. :bouncysmi

WickedBttrfly
August 25th, 2004, 02:21 AM
i think 3. 2 adopted.

Mysticism Deity
August 25th, 2004, 03:25 PM
I only wanted 2 at first but I got them in 1 shot. After having my twins I wanted more. I want another set of twins, or 2 singletons. 4 is perfect for me. I love the experiance.

My mom had 4 kids but 1 died 24 hours after birth.


no limit.

Fideal
August 25th, 2004, 04:49 PM
I want none. I have an awful family life, and I don't want that to happen to any kids of mine. I also don't like kids that much, and I want to be free to travel around and not ever get stuck in a relationship with someone bad because I have kids.

My mom always tells me I'll change my mind, and I always tell her that just because she has no self control doenst mean I don't. I plan to get ''fixed" after I turn 18.

My mom was oldest of two, and my dad was oldest of 4, and I'm oldest of two. It doesn't really influence me except to show me how NOT to live my life.

The High Queen of Faerie
August 25th, 2004, 09:04 PM
i don't want any :)