Is it just me...?

[rain_fallen_tears]

Or has alot of people seem to be short tempered lately, almost every post I go into someone is using what I see to be unneccesary sarcasm and are picking apart the person who makes the tiniest flaw. Perhaps its just a reaction to have been snapped at more in the last couple days than I have been my whole time at Mystic Wicks, or maybe I'm just being sensitive.....but its not only me, I've seen others being treated this way. I'm not blaming anyone, everyone has the right to a swing in moods, I was just wondering if anyone has noticed it, or may have theories on a possible cause.

Or is it really just me? :nyah: (wouldn't be the first time) :)

[fireswimmer]

I have been spending less time in the just talk section. Things have been really sweet in the health and beauty area.

[Strawberry Bounce]

Is it just me...?


Nope!

[tygherrayn]

Mercury is in retrograde .. that tends to happen, or so I've noticed.

[morrigen]

It does seem to come in cycles...I got my first rude pm this week...someone offered to spit on me!

Not pleasant, but this too shall pass :)

[Bec_W]

Some one offered to spit on you?? How rude and gross!

I've probably been one of the more snappy people recently, so yes I've noticed it.

[Phoenix Blue]

It does seem to come in cycles...I got my first rude pm this week...someone offered to spit on me!

Not pleasant, but this too shall pass :)
:wtf: The hell..?

[SacredWithin]

Well, I've noticed it in myself too. But I have been calming down again. BUT school is starting soon... so it might get...u-g-l-y...

But for the most part, I'm nice. :) I dunno, all I know is that normally, I'm very nice (unless provoked :fishsmack ).

[zakzekezedd]

Mecury has been retrograde for the last couple of weeks (whoopee! consider it a little bit of cosmic PMS if you will!) Since Mercury rules communication when it goes retrograde anything involving communication in any way shape or form gets pretty messed up. Arguments, disagreements, and people taking things the wrong way are all part of the package. This is also a rough time for anyone involved with any kind of contract or business dealings or negotiations. Mercury goes direct on Sept 9 so hopefully things will calm down a bit after that.

[Nighthawk]

Hmm, yea, there are a few wonky things...but, we will muddle through. Morrigen...spit on you?? Ummmm... that is not right...

[misschief]

i haven't noticed it any more than usual.

[Iris]

It does seem to come in cycles...I got my first rude pm this week...someone offered to spit on me!

!!!!!!!

If someone had sent me such a PM...I don't mean just a PM disagreeing with me, but an overtly rude or insulting PM that I had not provoked...I would post the PM in Just Talk. People who use PMs to be insulting are mean and cowardly, and I wouldn't let them get away with it.

[misschief]

well... i was told to die a horrible painful death ( i think those were the words ) in chat a few days ago. lmao.

[Desdemona]

I think there are a lot of factors, some planetary, some just plain old human condition. It's cold and rainy in many parts of the country, I know up here our summer had been woefully non-existent. We also have an election coming up. The economy is not so hot and people are losing their jobs.

The first and easiest place to take out your angst would be on a forum where the people are faceless. :(

[Ahautenites]

Mine is CMS (constant menstrual syndrome), familiarity-bred contempt, financial disgruntlement, and ennui, all exacerbated by the tense, annoying political climate and the feeling of continually waiting for the other shoe to drop (in the form of more buildings getting crashed into or blown up, or whatever).

[Old Witch]

Or has alot of people seem to be short tempered lately, almost every post I go into someone is using what I see to be unneccesary sarcasm and are picking apart the person who makes the tiniest flaw. Perhaps its just a reaction to have been snapped at more in the last couple days than I have been my whole time at Mystic Wicks, or maybe I'm just being sensitive.....but its not only me, I've seen others being treated this way. I'm not blaming anyone, everyone has the right to a swing in moods, I was just wondering if anyone has noticed it, or may have theories on a possible cause.

Or is it really just me? :nyah: (wouldn't be the first time) :)

It's not you. This stuff goes in cycles....ride it out, soon it will stop. Just like in all families, some people get gripey.....This too shall pass!

[Old Witch]

It does seem to come in cycles...I got my first rude pm this week...someone offered to spit on me!

Not pleasant, but this too shall pass :)

I hpoe you reported that one!!

[Terestai]

Yes... I ran into this astrologer again in the last week - someone who I've run into before. The first time, she stopped me in my tracks and said she had to give me a reading because she could sense something about me. Well, this time she told me about Mercury being in retrograde and about how that's messing up energy right now. Funny to see someone else saying it too. ;) I only follow astrology somewhat, but I'll never forget what this particular event does. I'll be glad when it's over.

Oddly enough, I thought alot of hostility had died down over the past week or so! :foh:

[Jenne]

Ya know, I've been feelin' scrappy lately, and I even mentioned it in a thread recently how everyone had their panties in a wad...so yeah, I totally noticed a somewhat negative vibe running around here lately. I've been experiencing it too, tho lately I've been to tired to feel ANYthing but, well...tired. LOL

:hugz: to all y'all...feelings easily get raw when good ol' Mercury hits that retrograde...think last time that went on this year, we lost a few members due to pm, chat and thread wars...

[Boogins]

I've seen it... indeed, I was discussing a specific incident yesterday with another member... but oi vey Morrigen! I do hope you reported that. There's no call for that kind of crap.

[Strawberry Bounce]

!!!!!!!

If someone had sent me such a PM...I don't mean just a PM disagreeing with me, but an overtly rude or insulting PM that I had not provoked...I would post the PM in Just Talk. People who use PMs to be insulting are mean and cowardly, and I wouldn't let them get away with it.http://mysticwicks.com/images/smilies2/clap.gif

[mara]

I thought things were starting to get better.

[Keith Dragon]

Yes, I noticed it, and it is all around, not just this site, but in my everday comings and goings.

I know Mercury was in retrograde this month which usually screws with communication. But I feel as if we are looming on the edge of something. Something big is about to happen, in the sense of Globular.

Dragon.

[Carickah]

:collapse:Doh!!! I knew that Mercury was Retro and it didn't even hit me... I was wondering why everyone I know seems to be fighting :stooges: and saying hurtful things to otherwise good friends. Mad me just want to run :yikess: away and gear up with self-defense :hutone: spells. We couldn't even :fpoke:fun at anyone. I thought it was the frustration :bangyourh of being forced into nearly 20 hrs of Overtime at work :uzi:. :damnpc:.I thought I might have to start going to work drunk :drinking:.
I think we all need to :hugz::hugz::hugz::huddle:and put it behind us. On one last note, I want to say to all of you here at MW that :yourock:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



K

[Erebus]

Mercury is in retrograde .. that tends to happen, or so I've noticed.

Is mercury ever NOT in retrograde? I'm starting to wonder...

[Ahautenites]

I agree. Mercury gets WAY too much credit for the things that go wrong in our lives.

[DixieWitch]

So, can I tell my husband that my constant bad mood for the past month is because of Mercury? He'll probably just roll his eyes! He asked me last night where could I buy some chill pills because I need them! I think I'm also on the PMS path too! But back to the original thread...yes, I have noticed!! I've been noticing it for the past month or so. And it was about a month or so ago that I posted almost the same exact thread!!

[morrigen]

I hpoe you reported that one!!

Nah, it was because I gave red karma (first time ever!), and told the person they need to grow up for threatening to beat up a 12 year old...they disagreed....

C'est la vie....I'm not bothered :)

[misschief]

Something big is about to happen, in the sense of Globular.

Dragon.
right. but it's been in the works for quite some time. that's been kicking up a notch or two every year for a lot of years. not saying it isn't especially escalated right now.. because i know it is. it's because we are right on the brink. :D

[redlady]

Aw, c'mon Morrigen...they probably heard about your bizarre sputum fetish and was trying to help you out :drool: :rollingla :goodgrief :blech: :uhhhhh: :eyebrow: :geez: :sick:

[Athena-Nadine]

*...shrugs...* I haven't noticed any of this. The only thing I know is that I am under a very large amount of stress right now, but it's due to very profound (and wonderful, but even wonderful things can be extremely stressful) changes in my life. I know that I've been a bit short-tempered because of it, but I haven't seen it in anyone else.

[Pesha]

I have been coming less with all the "nad" vibes I have felt. I had hoped it was just me in a mood, but it seems alot of folk have felt it too. I do not know what to say to it myself. Guess I wil just go with shields up and hope for the best.

BB
DS.

[wounded_crow]

well if i've lashed out or said anything to P.O. anyone.. i apploigise.
i can give you a list of reasons why (everything from us getting ready to make a life chaning move to getting off anti-depressants).. but I have no excuse for typing it... it should have stayed in my mind.

I'm not even sure if i've made anyone mad. But I figured I better cover myself.

[Koehnae]

Mecury has been retrograde for the last couple of weeks (whoopee! consider it a little bit of cosmic PMS if you will!) Since Mercury rules communication when it goes retrograde anything involving communication in any way shape or form gets pretty messed up. Arguments, disagreements, and people taking things the wrong way are all part of the package. This is also a rough time for anyone involved with any kind of contract or business dealings or negotiations. Mercury goes direct on Sept 9 so hopefully things will calm down a bit after that.
This would explain why I've been such a beotch to my sweetheart of a guy. I was just ready to rumble and he's looking at me like, "What did I do???" Poor guy!

[Xentor]

!!!!!!!

If someone had sent me such a PM...I don't mean just a PM disagreeing with me, but an overtly rude or insulting PM that I had not provoked...I would post the PM in Just Talk. People who use PMs to be insulting are mean and cowardly, and I wouldn't let them get away with it.

You will do no such thing. Not only will it merely add to the short-temperedness, you would be violating the rules just as much as the sender of the PM.

The correct action is to report it to the admins.

[Xentor]

Why is it that some of us are so quick to find a cause of our behaviour outside of ourselves? Does that make it easier to cope? Does it mean you can stop working on yourself and just be a bitch?

In a tight and fast-moving community like ours, everything goes a lot faster than out there in the real world. Moods change quickly. Fights rile up and die down. Love develops and evaporates. All of it much faster than normal. Why? Because we see each other so often. We want to be influenced by each other. That has both positive and negative effects.

Forget about Mercury for a moment. Think of what YOU can do today, to make yourself and those around you a little happy.

[rain_fallen_tears]

I'd like to thank everybody! I was worried I and the few I saw were just rubbing everyones cat hair the wrong way!:D I'm glad everyone took the time to post. And certainly highly appreciate all the possible resaons things have been wonky lately! I'd give you all karma, but for some funky reason, my computer won't load the little karma window or smilies.... :ack: ....thanks again and love to you all! :smile:

[LadyTrinity]

I think something is going on cause ive been cursed with the bitchyness too :wtf:

[Xentor]

for some funky reason, my computer won't load the little karma window or smilies

Off topic: please check that your browser allows pop-up windows for Mystic Wicks. The karma and smilies windows are pop-ups.

[Aelfoak]

Why is it that some of us are so quick to find a cause of our behaviour outside of ourselves? Does that make it easier to cope? Does it mean you can stop working on yourself and just be a bitch?

In a tight and fast-moving community like ours, everything goes a lot faster than out there in the real world. Moods change quickly. Fights rile up and die down. Love develops and evaporates. All of it much faster than normal. Why? Because we see each other so often. We want to be influenced by each other. That has both positive and negative effects.

Forget about Mercury for a moment. Think of what YOU can do today, to make yourself and those around you a little happy.
I fully agree with Xentor on this one, stop putting your blame on everything else apart from yourselves, how can a planet that is 20 Billion miles away be the cause of you being nasty to somebody else, i also have a major stressful job, have no money, i get down sometimes, but i don't come on here and slag people off and be nasty to them, everyone should just stop making excuses for themselves *geez*!

[Noriohtle]

I will be honest.. i have had Foot-in-mouth disease this week, as soon as it was diagnosed i took the only known cure .... yanked it quickly out changed socks washed my mouth out with sweet smelling soap and did the unthinkable said IM SORRY!! if you say something then after you post it are like DOH i cant belive that came from me remember there is a cure no matter how bitter a pill to take.

[Iris]

You will do no such thing. Not only will it merely add to the short-temperedness, you would be violating the rules just as much as the sender of the PM.

The correct action is to report it to the admins.

I beg your pardon?! "You will do no such thing" ???!

Last time I checked, you weren't my father. So kindly refrain from speaking as if you are.

Yes, I'm aware that you're a mod, but I still think there are nicer ways to speak to people than simply ordering them about!

[Ahautenites]

Beg to differ with you, Iris. He wasn't rude. He was telling you like it is.

[Kaylara]

I beg your pardon?! "You will do no such thing" ???!

Last time I checked, you weren't my father. So kindly refrain from speaking as if you are.

Yes, I'm aware that you're a mod, but I still think there are nicer ways to speak to people than simply ordering them about!No Iris, You will do no such thing. Your post warrented the response you got, and if you don't like it, perhaps you should think before you post. Saying you are going to send nasty pm's back and forth or even post a nasty pm on the site is against our rules. Xentor is not a moderator, he is and Administrator of this website. If he gives you a direction because of something that one of your posts contains, then perhaps you should listen to it. If you have a problem with a direction that an Administrator gave you, you can go ahead and contact another Administrator.

Thank you
Kaylara

[Sleet]

Beg to differ with you, Iris. He wasn't rude. He was telling you like it is.

There are, however, gentler ways to tell it.

[Kaylara]

What she was saying she was going to do, was not gentle. In anycase, if she has a problem, she can take it to a different administrator.

[Iris]

There are, however, gentler ways to tell it.

That was exactly my point.

What I was saying wasn't GENTLE, Kaylara? And offering to spit on someone IS?

[Ahautenites]

There were no exclamation points or bolding or all-caps.... the sentence seemed fairly straightforward to me. He said that you will do no such thing. I just don't see anything rude about it. It was merely a statement of fact. I dunno. Maybe I'm just still feeling the sting of seeing my own private message to someone this weekend posted for all of MW to see.

[Xentor]

Those free of sins may throw the first stone (hands out rocks).

The mere fact that someone else violates the rules, does not give you permission to do so as well. Not even us administrators are allowed to break those rules.

Yes I was stern with you, Iris, and yes, I believe your post called for it.

No, offering to spit on someone is not gentle. The correct way to handle it however is not a public display, but reporting it to the admins. By displaying publicly you will lower yourself to the same level of those you wish to display. Yes, it will result in corrective action. But as you found out, you will find yourself being the one corrected.

These are simple rules to play by.

[Sleet]

I was not aware that Xentor is an admin, which changes the context considerably.

[Xentor]

I was not aware that Xentor is an admin, which changes the context considerably.

Duly noted. I will change my signature to make it more clear.

[Iris]

There were no exclamation points or bolding or all-caps.... the sentence seemed fairly straightforward to me. He said that you will do no such thing. I just don't see anything rude about it. It was merely a statement of fact. I dunno. Maybe I'm just still feeling the sting of seeing my own private message to someone this weekend posted for all of MW to see.

Well personally, I thought the sentence was rather rude. It could have been put in a variety of different ways, NICER ways. I am not a child, and resent being spoken to as such. While I understand there are rules which must be obeyed by MW users, I still felt Xentor could have been a little less forceful about it.

Yeah, I was aware of that thread NeverSesemet, but without knowing anything about the context in which the PM was made, I think I more or less ignored it.

Kaylara, I have no problems with the rules of the site. But seeing as I have never as such READ the rules (to me, most of the rules that admins impose on most forums are just common sense...no cursing etc...) I wasn't actually aware that posting PMs was against those rules. I am not disputing the rules. My problem is that I didn't particularly like the way Xentor phrased his statement

In my opinion, people who are going to stoop so low as to be mean and insulting in a PM deserve everything they get, and this has been my method of dealing with such problems on OTHER sites, where it wasn't against the rules. I would post the PM that I felt to be inappropriate, and show up that person for the coward they were. I wouldn't say anything myself, just make the post and let the other users reach their own conclusions. To me, this was a simple and effective way of dealing with such people.

[Sleet]

Duly noted. I will change my signature to make it more clear.

Well, I probably should have been able to figure it out. Who else would quote the community rules in their .sig? ;)

[Terestai]

The mere fact that someone else violates the rules, does not give you permission to do so as well. Not even us administrators are allowed to break those rules.

I like those rules... :lol: Seriously! I was on a forum where the mods continuously broke the rules, and their power trips tore the place apart. It didn't literally tear it apart (about 100,000 members and still going strong), but it sucked to post there. I've seen no such thing going on here.

I moderate a board at a forum completely unrelated to Paganism, and I institute the same policy that Xen just stated. In fact, I've been the biggest advocate for having the other mods follow the site's rules and getting rid of ones who continuously break them.

[Iris]

Those free of sins may throw the first stone (hands out rocks).

The mere fact that someone else violates the rules, does not give you permission to do so as well. Not even us administrators are allowed to break those rules.

Yes I was stern with you, Iris, and yes, I believe your post called for it.

No, offering to spit on someone is not gentle. The correct way to handle it however is not a public display, but reporting it to the admins. By displaying publicly you will lower yourself to the same level of those you wish to display. Yes, it will result in corrective action. But as you found out, you will find yourself being the one corrected.

These are simple rules to play by.

Ok Xentor, I have been duly corrected. I have no problem whatsoever with the rules of the site...I didn't realise that posting PMs was against the rules.

My only problem was with the way you spoke to me. I thought it was kinda rude.

[Desdemona]

Xentor, thank you for clearing that up. I thought it was against the rules to post private messages for the public to see. I thought that was the whole point of sending privately, to keep it from becoming a public row. Not that I am advocating abuse, but sometimes people get ticked and they will send you a zinger.

If I posted what someone said to me in a heated moment when they gave me red karma, I think that would lower me even further below them, and make me look bad, not them. What do they call that? Dirty pool? And he is a beloved member of this community, too.

People get crabby, and I would much prefer to be taken to task in private than publicly humiliated. The main reason is that stuff changes so rapidly. I find myself on the same and opposite sides of the table with the same people quite regularly. ;)

[mol]

Ok Xentor, I have been duly corrected. I have no problem whatsoever with the rules of the site...I didn't realise that posting PMs was against the rules.

My only problem was with the way you spoke to me. I thought it was kinda rude.
Well, he has cleary stated over and over as well as others that he was not being rude. You took it the wrong way. He was simply making a statement.

I dont understand why we have to sugarcoat everything. I'm not coming down on you, just discussing in general. Xentor made no rude comment at all. He just didnt put in any smilies or any LOL's so people assume that he is being rude?! Grief.

[Terestai]

Well, he has cleary stated over and over as well as others that he was not being rude. You took it the wrong way. He was simply making a statement.

I dont understand why we have to sugarcoat everything. I'm not coming down on you, just discussing in general. Xentor made no rude comment at all. He just didnt put in any smilies or any LOL's so people assume that he is being rude?! Grief.

Geez... you don't have to be so rude about it, mol. :bangyourh



:lol: :fpraiseyo

[Iris]

Well, he has cleary stated over and over as well as others that he was not being rude. You took it the wrong way. He was simply making a statement.

I dont understand why we have to sugarcoat everything. I'm not coming down on you, just discussing in general. Xentor made no rude comment at all. He just didnt put in any smilies or any LOL's so people assume that he is being rude?! Grief.

Obviously people have different opinions about what is rude and what is not.

Smilies have nothing to do with it. I consider the sentence "You will do no such thing" to be rude. I would consider it rude if a member of my own family said that to me, so of course I'm liable to consider it rude when a stranger says it.

In my opinion, a more appropriate way would have been simply to say "That's against the site rules" or something similar, to which I would not have taken offence. The fact is, people don't like being told what to do in such a forceful, authoritarian manner. It's bound to get peoples' backs up. Therefore, and having been a moderator myself on several boards, I would choose to use less forceful language.

[mol]

So we need to be less forceful when enforcing the rules?

[Kaylara]

Kaylara, I have no problems with the rules of the site. But seeing as I have never as such READ the rules (to me, most of the rules that admins impose on most forums are just common sense...no cursing etc...) I wasn't actually aware that posting PMs was against those rules. I am not disputing the rules. My problem is that I didn't particularly like the way Xentor phrased his statement

In my opinion, people who are going to stoop so low as to be mean and insulting in a PM deserve everything they get, and this has been my method of dealing with such problems on OTHER sites, where it wasn't against the rules. I would post the PM that I felt to be inappropriate, and show up that person for the coward they were. I wouldn't say anything myself, just make the post and let the other users reach their own conclusions. To me, this was a simple and effective way of dealing with such people.
It's your responsibility as a member to know the rules of this community. If you break them, or say you're going to break them, it doesn't matter whether you've read them or not. We're going to respond accordingly. On THIS site, it's not ok to post someone's PM on the boards without their permission, whether you think they're a coward, or deserve it, or whatever. I don't care if it's ok at other sites. This is MW, not some other site. If you have a personal problem with someone, keep it personal. No need to drag the drama out into public. And no offense, but I think it's stooping even lower to post something that someone pm'd you that you thought was obnoxious. At least they had the courtesy for the rest of the members on the site to keep the issue private.

[mol]

!!!!!!!

If someone had sent me such a PM...I don't mean just a PM disagreeing with me, but an overtly rude or insulting PM that I had not provoked...I would post the PM in Just Talk. People who use PMs to be insulting are mean and cowardly, and I wouldn't let them get away with it.
Oh good, golly, gee! That would be a no-no since that is against our rules! Pretty please don't ever do that, just PM an admin if you have any troubles.

[mol]

:) There! I interpreted Xentor's post, Iris! ;)

[Iris]

Oh good, golly, gee! That would be a no-no since that is against our rules! Pretty please don't ever do that, just PM an admin if you have any troubles.

Ok mol, no problem. Like I said, I didn't realise it was against the rules. But now that I do, I'll be sure to deal with the problem in the appropriate manner if it should ever arise.

I'm not a rule-breaker, honest. I'm far too lazy to be an anarchist.

[Terestai]

So we need to be less forceful when enforcing the rules?

I speak from past experience (which I'm sure you already know) that it doesn't work. If you try to do these things with subtelty, the people who most need the direction are invariably the ones who don't pick up on the subtle hints.

So you shouldn't take offense, Iris. A stern hand is needed across the board because some people wouldn't pick up on the message as well as you would. :D

[Iris]

:) There! I interpreted Xentor's post, Iris! ;)

:lol:

Good call, mol.

[Kaylara]

Obviously people have different opinions about what is rude and what is not.

Smilies have nothing to do with it. I consider the sentence "You will do no such thing" to be rude. I would consider it rude if a member of my own family said that to me, so of course I'm liable to consider it rude when a stranger says it.

In my opinion, a more appropriate way would have been simply to say "That's against the site rules" or something similar, to which I would not have taken offence. The fact is, people don't like being told what to do in such a forceful, authoritarian manner. It's bound to get peoples' backs up. Therefore, and having been a moderator myself on several boards, I would choose to use less forceful language.
So what you're saying here, is that in order to enforce the rules on the site, we shouldn't take a position of authority. No forceful authoritarian things... Right. Honestly, it should get their backs up. If they did something wrong, then they should get their backs up enough to go read the rules of the site and not post similar things in the future.

[mol]

I speak from past experience (which I'm sure you already know) that it doesn't work. If you try to do these things with subtelty, the people who most need the direction are invariably the ones who don't pick up on the subtle hints.

So you shouldn't take offense, Iris. A stern hand is needed across the board because some people wouldn't pick up on the message as well as you would. :D
Absolutely. We are supposed to keep the site running and safe. We never said we were going to be all smiles about it all the time. Sometimes we just need to make our point and move on so we can handle all the pm's, emails, and reports.

[mol]

So what you're saying here, is that in order to enforce the rules on the site, we shouldn't take a position of authority. No forceful authoritarian things... Right. Honestly, it should get their backs up. If they did something wrong, then they should get their backs up enough to go read the rules of the site and not post similar things in the future.
I think she gets it! Put down the hammer and walk away!

[Iris]

So we need to be less forceful when enforcing the rules?

Well, a little niceness goes a long way. People tend to respond much better to "Please don't...etc etc" rather than "YOU WILL NOT...etc etc FOR IF YOU DO, I WILL MURDER YOU HORRIBLY!" :lol:

This is getting terribly silly now :)

[mol]

Well, a little niceness goes a long way. People tend to respond much better to "Please don't...etc etc" rather than "YOU WILL NOT...etc etc FOR IF YOU DO, I WILL MURDER YOU HORRIBLY!" :lol:

This is getting terribly silly now :)
Oh yah? I have been doing this for about 4 years now. And I can tell you, from experience, niceness does not go any further than being stern. In fact, I prefer being stern when it comes to things like the community rules because it seems to make more of an impact.

[Iris]

So what you're saying here, is that in order to enforce the rules on the site, we shouldn't take a position of authority. No forceful authoritarian things... Right. Honestly, it should get their backs up. If they did something wrong, then they should get their backs up enough to go read the rules of the site and not post similar things in the future.

I didn't DO anything wrong. Read my post above. I find generally people respond better to a simple request rather than an order. Especially when they haven't broken the rules and had no intention of doing so.

The strictness, in my opinion, should be relative to the crime committed. In this case it was simply (unwitting) conspiracy to commit a crime. Not actual first degree murder.

Can you dig it?

[Nighthawk]

Iris.... HI guys... I am not an admin...just a guy here.. Xentor is not an american... he does not talk the same.. obviously he knows english...but he phrases things differently... I had a time at first, in understanding what he was ..or rather HOW he was saying and meaning things... Xentor is a really cool guy... and does not try to offend. GIve the guy a break, please? It is ok.... I cannot see hanging on to this..

[Iris]

Oh yah? I have been doing this for about 4 years now. And I can tell you, from experience, niceness does not go any further than being stern. In fact, I prefer being stern when it comes to things like the community rules because it seems to make more of an impact.

Personally, if you were to tell me off mol, I would be like this:

:yikes: :wah2:

Don't you, say, try to be nice at first and then if that doesn't work, become gradually more strict? Or do you just reach for the flame-thrower straight away? :lol:

[Kaylara]

Oh yah? I have been doing this for about 4 years now. And I can tell you, from experience, niceness does not go any further than being stern. In fact, I prefer being stern when it comes to things like the community rules because it seems to make more of an impact.
Gods... It's been four years. LMAO! *hands Mol the battle axe*

And I agree with Mol. I'm generally laid back, but I've been doing this almost as long as he has, and I will get stern if I feel it's needed. There are a lot of people here, and sometimes just being nice isn't going to cut it.

[Terestai]

Iris.... HI guys... I am not an admin...just a guy here.. Xentor is not an american... he does not talk the same.. obviously he knows english...but he phrases things differently... I had a time at first, in understanding what he was ..or rather HOW he was saying and meaning things... Xentor is a really cool guy... and does not try to offend. GIve the guy a break, please? It is ok.... I cannot see hanging on to this..

Yes! :hugz: all around. :D And Iris, the problem with using niceities in a position of authority is that things can start to become lax. We tried it at the forum I moderate (which has about 30 people who fight constantly and hate each other - to the point that I've pretty much abandoned that site for this one), and it didn't get anywhere. We couldn't get anyone to be stern, and I could see how the site suffered because of it. This is a well-run site of over 10,000 members, and I think it's a testament to how things are being done.

Besides, mods and admins have no way of knowing who's going to react to what... best to do it one way and be equal in how they handle all issues. :D

[mol]

Personally, if you were to tell me off mol, I would be like this:

:yikes: :wah2:

Don't you, say, try to be nice at first and then if that doesn't work, become gradually more strict? Or do you just reach for the flame-thrower straight away? :lol:Well, I just usually go into admin mode and post the rule being broken. Thats what all the admins do, or at least, they *should* be. :) That way there is no chit chat or room for being misinterpreted. What Xentor was doing was telling you in his english-is-my-second-language way that if you did this you WOULD be breaking the rules.

But, we are stern by rule. We go into admin mode and post the rule(s) being broken. No hand holding. No chit chat.

[Ahautenites]

One question: Xen, can you tutor me in "enligh" as *my* second language?

**grins hugely at mol and runs away**

[mol]

One question: Xen, can you tutor me in "enligh" as *my* second language?

**grins hugely at mol and runs away**
YOU SUCK! :p

[Iris]

Why, where is Xentor from?

What's his first language?

I don't think we've ever spoken before.

[Nighthawk]

Xentor is from the Netherlands.....

[earthprincess]

I just have to laugh real quick here. I know most of us are not the NORM. but really do we need to argue over every little difference in opinion. Some of us are not American... Others just dont share the same ideas. ITS OK! that is what makes this place so great... Being different... My advice is dont get your panties in a twist bc someone didnt say something you like.. Brush it off and move on.. If its really getting to a point of harasment (sp) or being abused.... then tell someone who can do something for you... Otherwise MOVE ON AND JUST LET IT GO...... BREATHE AND COUNT TO TEN AND MOVE ON.

I love you all ............ BUT COME ON PEOPLE RELAX A LITTLE THIS ISNT BRAIN SURGERY IN HERE WE ARE HERE TO TALK RELAX AND HAVE SOME FUN!

[Iris]

I just have to laugh real quick here. I know most of us are not the NORM. but really do we need to argue over every little difference in opinion. Some of us are not American... Others just dont share the same ideas. ITS OK! that is what makes this place so great... Being different... My advice is dont get your panties in a twist bc someone didnt say something you like.. Brush it off and move on.. If its really getting to a point of harasment (sp) or being abused.... then tell someone who can do something for you... Otherwise MOVE ON AND JUST LET IT GO...... BREATHE AND COUNT TO TEN AND MOVE ON.

I love you all ............ BUT COME ON PEOPLE RELAX A LITTLE THIS ISNT BRAIN SURGERY IN HERE WE ARE HERE TO TALK RELAX AND HAVE SOME FUN!

Agreed, earthprincess. This is the first time I have had anything APPROACHING a disagreement in the whole time I've been here.

[Fairyelf]

I dont lose my patience on the boards..
I really have no reason to.
and I dont dislike anyone here :hugs:

[Lunadria]

I'm sure i'll be shot for saying this, but grow up! The Mod's/Administrators do their job, and I think pretty damn well for the amount of members the community has... BUT, going on and on at a person who said something you didn't agree with is a little childish and in my opinion just as bad as someone breaking the rules. Point out what's wrong with what's been said then leave it, they will either take your direction or they won't and if they do something else that you need to address take it further in private. I really like coming here, and am fond of alot of you, but this constant bickering is really boring.

[Iris]

I'm sure i'll be shot for saying this, but grow up! The Mod's/Administrators do their job, and I think pretty damn well for the amount of members the community has... BUT, going on and on at a person who said something you didn't agree with is a little childish and in my opinion just as bad as someone breaking the rules. Point out what's wrong with what's been said then leave it, they will either take your direction or they won't and if they do something else that you need to address take it further in private. I really like coming here, and am fond of alot of you, but this constant bickering is really boring.

Not shot...how about stabbed? I don't have easy access to a gun...

I'll give you a head start and everything.

People kept making posts saying why I was wrong, so in reply I kept making posts justifying my original post. That's all. I would not have 'gone on and on' as you put it if people hadn't kept on making posts about my post. When someone replies to something I said, or comments on it, I reply. Simple as that.

[Lunadria]

Not shot...how about stabbed? I don't have easy access to a gun...

I'll give you a head start and everything.

People kept making posts saying why I was wrong, so in reply I kept making posts justifying my original post. That's all. I would not have 'gone on and on' as you put it if people hadn't kept on making posts about my post. When someone replies to something I said, or comments on it, I reply. Simple as that.

If you read my post you'd see I was commenting on both sides, not just yours. Quite frankly, I don't agree with posting anyone's private conversations on a public board. however, I don't agree with more than one mod coming down on one person either <shrug> I think both sides could have handled this alot better is all I'm saying.

[Charise]

Or has alot of people seem to be short tempered lately, almost every post I go into someone is using what I see to be unneccesary sarcasm and are picking apart the person who makes the tiniest flaw. Perhaps its just a reaction to have been snapped at more in the last couple days than I have been my whole time at Mystic Wicks, or maybe I'm just being sensitive.....but its not only me, I've seen others being treated this way. I'm not blaming anyone, everyone has the right to a swing in moods, I was just wondering if anyone has noticed it, or may have theories on a possible cause.

Or is it really just me? :nyah: (wouldn't be the first time) :)


soooo.... getting back to the original topic.. hehe

I dunno... could be the weather changing... that usually causes me to get very moody.
but I'm female too.. and so quite often it has nothing to do with the weather or any other reasonable explination..

I say a nice hot cuppa and a good bout of 'just silly' and we are all right as rain again! :tongueout

[Semele]

Forget about Mercury for a moment. Think of what YOU can do today, to make yourself and those around you a little happy.
OK. :hugz: I love ya!

Your salary is doubled...er you know just trying to make you happy!

[Iris]

soooo.... getting back to the original topic.. hehe

I dunno... could be the weather changing... that usually causes me to get very moody.
but I'm female too.. and so quite often it has nothing to do with the weather or any other reasonable explination..

I say a nice hot cuppa and a good bout of 'just silly' and we are all right as rain again! :tongueout

I don't frequent 'Just Silly' much. Maybe I should start :)

[Kaylara]

We were having a discussion, and another Administrator's action was question, hence additional Admins getting involved.

[Charise]

oh I highly recommend it!

I could be having the absolute worst day in the history of bad days... go there and just reply here and there.. and before I know it... family members are thinking I've lost my mind because I'm up here in my office all alone... laughing hysterically.

defo a good little place to wind down and relax tension. ;)

[Xentor]

OK. :hugz: I love ya!

Your salary is doubled...er you know just trying to make you happy!

wOOt! Let's see, with the latest raise, that makes double of nothing, so now I make...

...oh.

[Kaylara]

*cracks up* They've been getting me with that one for years Xen...

[Nighthawk]

Ha ha ha ha

[Terestai]

wOOt! Let's see, with the latest raise, that makes double of nothing, so now I make...

...oh.

You could go to the casinos with that! :lol:

Double or nothing? You'd win every time!

[mol]

If you read my post you'd see I was commenting on both sides, not just yours. Quite frankly, I don't agree with posting anyone's private conversations on a public board. however, I don't agree with more than one mod coming down on one person either <shrug> I think both sides could have handled this alot better is all I'm saying.
Both could have handled what? We are having a discussion.

[Old Witch]

Is it time I hijack this thread to JS?.... :yayah:

[mol]

wOOt! Let's see, with the latest raise, that makes double of nothing, so now I make...

...oh.
You should see what we have paid *out*. :p

[Lunadria]

Both could have handled what? We are having a discussion.

Well, maybe you are discussing, but sometimes it's best to take these matters up in private. Becoming quite apparent here that if your opinion disagrees with the mass you aren't welcome.

[Xentor]

Well, maybe you are discussing, but sometimes it's best to take these matters up in private. Becoming quite apparent here that if your opinion disagrees with the mass you aren't welcome.

Come again?

Disagreeing is fine. Breaking the rules is not. It's as simple as that.

[Lunadria]

Come again?

Disagreeing is fine. Breaking the rules is not. It's as simple as that.

And attacking me for airing my opinion is ok?

[Terestai]

Please bring another dead horse to the table... I need more flogging material!! :bangyourh

This argument is so 1979... :lol:

[mol]

Becoming quite apparent here that if your opinion disagrees with the mass you aren't welcome.Wrong.

Just becuase MORE people agree with the opposition does not make your opinion any less valid nor does it mean you are unwelcome.

[mol]

And attacking me for airing my opinion is ok?
Did I miss the attack?

[Lunadria]

Wrong.

Fine, I give up. I'll leave

[Ahautenites]

Why are people so intent on seeing malice where there is none?

Calm, rational statements explaining a position is hardly "attacking." Attacking would look more like this:

"You stupid idiot! I can't believe you think you're right! How could you say such a thing?!??!? I hate you and you're ugly, you.... you, POOPOO-HEAD!"

See the difference?

[mol]

Fine, I give up. I'll leave
Well, you missed my edit. But, if you are leaving...have a good one! :)

[mol]

Why are people so intent on seeing malice where there is none?

Calm, rational statements explaining a position is hardly "attacking." Attacking would look more like this:

"You stupid idiot! I can't believe you think you're right! How could you say such a thing?!??!? I hate you and you're ugly, you.... you, POOPOO-HEAD!"

See the difference?
Exactly.

[Terestai]

"You stupid idiot! I can't believe you think you're right! How could you say such a thing?!??!? I hate you and you're ugly, you.... you, POOPOO-HEAD!"

I don't think Aristotle could have said it better... your command of the Enligh language leaves me speechless once again. :D

*ducks for cover*

[Ahautenites]

**nearly gets diet lime Coke all over her from laughing while drinking and reading at the same time**

Those tutoring lessons are coming along dandy, thanks to Xentor.

[mol]

**nearly gets diet lime Coke all over her from laughing while drinking and reading at the same time**

Those tutoring lessons are coming along dandy, thanks to Xentor.
OK.

[Iris]

Attacking would look more like this:

"You stupid idiot! I can't believe you think you're right! How could you say such a thing?!??!? I hate you and you're ugly, you.... you, POOPOO-HEAD!"

See the difference?

How about "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries" ??

[WandererInGray]

"You stupid idiot! I can't believe you think you're right! How could you say such a thing?!??!? I hate you and you're ugly, you.... you, POOPOO-HEAD!"

Who you callin' a Poopoo-head, Troll bait?
:smash:


:rollingla and then runs*

[nomadicdragon]

:rollingla :hehehe:

poopyhead

:rollingla

[mol]

:rollingla :hehehe:

poopyhead

:rollingla
Not poopyhead! PooPoo-head!

[nomadicdragon]

I said..... POOPYHEAD!

*snickers*