emotional turmoil

[dragonsfollower]

:huh: okay in my last thread i mentiond my friend and his girlfriend. i spent the day with her while he was at work today, before anyone freaks he knew about it. my problem is this while with her to day i learned that she hadnt intended to date him, some of the things he does bugs her and the REAL problems are these: A)i am really attracted to this girl our energies seem to matsh so perfectly B) she told me she knows she must do something but wouldnt tell me what C) he is married and wont tell her. I promised him id not say anything and that i wouldnt act on the way i feel. to me tey dont seem to fit together right. but i dont know what i should do. should i act on my feelings and hurt him. let her get hrut when she learns the truth.

[dragonsfollower]

:rubhead: no one wants to help huh
:huh: okay in my last thread i mentiond my friend and his girlfriend. i spent the day with her while he was at work today, before anyone freaks he knew about it. my problem is this while with her to day i learned that she hadnt intended to date him, some of the things he does bugs her and the REAL problems are these: A)i am really attracted to this girl our energies seem to matsh so perfectly B) she told me she knows she must do something but wouldnt tell me what C) he is married and wont tell her. I promised him id not say anything and that i wouldnt act on the way i feel. to me tey dont seem to fit together right. but i dont know what i should do. should i act on my feelings and hurt him. let her get hrut when she learns the truth.

[{Tigress}]

I'm sorry, I have you down as already having a Peer Counselor from you post in your last thread. Has no one contacted you yet?

[dragonsfollower]

nope

[fairywings]

I'm not an official peer counselor, but I'll talk with you about this. I am 42 years old, on my 2nd marriage, and I had more failed relationships than I care to think about before that (and a few nice ones too).

For one thing, your married friend does not deserve her, he's married! And his deceitfulness towards her about not wanting her to know is sickening. I can understand you having loyalty to your friend, but in this case, you must both use your head and your heart. The fact that you feel a positive connection with this girl is significant. You must not assist in hurting her by supporting your friend's deception any longer, and you really aught to be true to yourself and let her know how you feel. Maybe pass this by your friend first so he is not totally shocked or feel betrayed by you, but even he must see the truth in this situation. If he objects very strongly to your postion, too bad. Maybe this girl will turn out to be worth more in your life than than your friend ever was. And if he is a true friend, he'll come back around when he gets over it. He really is in the wrong.

Good luck!

~fairywings

[dragonsfollower]

:fprisoner thank you your advice will really help i hope as for telling her how i feel she already knows
:collapse: sorry al's drunk agian

I'm not an official peer counselor, but I'll talk with you about this. I am 42 years old, on my 2nd marriage, and I had more failed relationships than I care to think about before that (and a few nice ones too).

For one thing, your married friend does not deserve her, he's married! And his deceitfulness towards her about not wanting her to know is sickening. I can understand you having loyalty to your friend, but in this case, you must both use your head and your heart. The fact that you feel a positive connection with this girl is significant. You must not assist in hurting her by supporting your friend's deception any longer, and you really aught to be true to yourself and let her know how you feel. Maybe pass this by your friend first so he is not totally shocked or feel betrayed by you, but even he must see the truth in this situation. If he objects very strongly to your postion, too bad. Maybe this girl will turn out to be worth more in your life than than your friend ever was. And if he is a true friend, he'll come back around when he gets over it. He really is in the wrong.

Good luck!

~fairywings

[dragonsfollower]

one more thing how the hell do you close a thread???????????????????????

[{Tigress}]

one more thing how the hell do you close a thread???????????????????????

Does this mean you don't need me to find someone for you? lol

Let me know either way, please.

[dragonsfollower]

not any more several people have pmd me

[dragonsfollower]

well i mthink ive fallen in love with ramona......hell i know i have but ive not seen or heard and i still dont know how to handle josh :huh: what is the best way to do it ive tryed to talk to him but he wont listen. man i just dont know what to do. worst of all like i said ive fallen in love with my friends girlfriend. is that wrong????????????


:collapse: <----- meet al the drunkin smilie

[banondraig]

well i mthink ive fallen in love with ramona......hell i know i have but ive not seen or heard and i still dont know how to handle josh :huh: what is the best way to do it ive tryed to talk to him but he wont listen. man i just dont know what to do. worst of all like i said ive fallen in love with my friends girlfriend. is that wrong????????????


:collapse: <----- meet al the drunkin smilie

$h!t happens. it's not good to fall in love with girlfriends of friends, but this friend (being MARRIED!) shouldn't be having girlfriends in the first place, esp. if this married person is who i think it is. to hell with him anyway. maybe it will help teach him to not to be a little he-slut. it happens sometimes that people find someone new before their marriages are oficially over, but the honorable thing to do would be to say, "look, i like you, but i'm married. i can expect the divorce to be final at x time, maybe we can take this further then." lying to her is just sleazy, and she deserves to know, whether the wife is nearby or not.