My daughter...she's just gone

[Lady Jade]

Ok, I have not been here to post for awhile, but find myself in an impossible situation:

my 14 year old daughter lives with her Dad, b/c she chooses not to follow the house rules when she is here. We have significant differences and her Dad pretty much controls her mind. Alex and I have been estranged for a few years and our relationship strained, but at least we still saw each other about once a month.

Well, 3 weeks ago, against custody orders and without informing me, my lunkhead ex husband took off with her to Nevada (or that's what was said). Nobody here has heard from them for 3 weeks, not even a phone call. My ex Mother in law and I are not aware of anyone they may know out there and they have not called to even as much report that they are in any particualar place or that they made it out there or if they are ok.

Now, my son informs me he knew of this secret move, but was sworn to secrecy by his Dad, not to tell me until they were gone. He says they only wanted to move to "get me out of their lives", which I could have understood better if they had not just up and left, him thinking I would not care. We are not on the best of terms and my ex's way of thinking affects how my kids view the world, he's a real gem.

If I seek to find her, my only recourse is to report her missing, which turns the Ex into a fugutive for kidnapping, even though he is her father and legal custodian (for school purposes only, otherwise we have shared parenting). If I choose to report, the kidnapping goes into effect whether I like it or not.

My other option is do nothing and wonder forever or until she calls (that may be never) if she is dead somewhere along side the road. They were supposed to be taking a bus there, but they had no money, so i suspect they hitched a ride somehow. A dangerous activity for my ex to be teaching a young girl in itself.

Today is her birthday and I figured if she was going to call someone anyone, it would be today. It doesn't look like I'll hear from her. Now I am faced with how to proceed.

If I can find her and haul her back here, it's likely she will run away from my house. She will be even more unhappy with me for "getting her dad" in trouble, even though this is clearly a bad choice on his behalf and the trouble is his own creation. The kids won't see it that way.

I could do nothing and continue not sleeping due to the fact I don't know where one of my children is and whether she is ok or not. I can just keep waiting for that phone call that may never come.

I can turn this situation over to the authorities and get out of the way of progress.

I can ....well, any ideas? help me figure this one out. She does not want to be with me at any cost, but I still love her and want her to be safe. if I just knew she was safe that would make things ok enough to handle. Not knowing, though...

[misschief]

i would file charges. i don't know what else to say. :(

[Phoenix Blue]

If I seek to find her, my only recourse is to report her missing, which turns the Ex into a fugutive for kidnapping, even though he is her father and legal custodian (for school purposes only, otherwise we have shared parenting). If I choose to report, the kidnapping goes into effect whether I like it or not.
**Soft smile** Kidnapping is exactly what he's done, hon. I agree with LadyLeo; file the report.

[Aleannah]

he absolutely went against court orders and took her...file the charges. :hugz:

[Lady Jade]

**Soft smile** Kidnapping is exactly what he's done, hon. I agree with LadyLeo; file the report.


It can be as simple as that. The atomic fallout from hauling her back here won't be. I am calling my lawyer tomorrow to discuss all possible avenues. In the meantime, more advice is welcomed.

Edit* The court papers state that neither of us is allowed to move from the address listed on the pleadings without previously notifying the other parent and the court. Maybe this is custodial interference? But that won't get her home.

[Ceres]

i wont advise...all i can say is your story made me cry - i hope it ends well!! no mother should ever have to wonder where her babies are

[Aleannah]

it is good that you are talking to your lawyer...he will be able to advise you best...

[bridgewitch]

I went thru much the same thing. Mine was 18 tho and ran off with an abusive bf. I had an idea where they were and went to Witchvox and looked up the pagan connections in that state, covens I mean, and it was Texas so there were a few. I had I dont know how many people looking for them and even went as far as to email trucking companies to ask if he was working for them. I made it clear that I would not bother her, but simply wanted to know if she was alive and ok. She was found by a member of a group I had contacted and was "watched over". I was notified that she was ok every 2 weeks or so. Someone also struck up a "friendship" with her and they talked about letting her family know she was ok. It took 6 months but she finally called me. I will be forever grateful to the unknown people who looked out for her for me and kept me informed. Funny, after she finally called me, the email addy I had for the person who contacted me went "bad" so I will never know who to thank personally. Hang in there!! Try this and see if you can get some idea if she is ok. It really does not sound like a healthy relationship, but I am just assuming facts not in evidence. If you think your daughter is in physical or psychological danger, then go on and report it. He has taken her out of state anyway and this violates your shared custody. It does not sound ike you would be losing a good friend anyway. He has already made you son an accomplice in the matter, so he does not seem to be taking your feelings into consideration. My best to you. I will keep you and yours in my thoughts. BB

[Autumn]

I agree with the others about filing charges, as ugly as it will be, your attorney can make it known to lunkhead that a plea will be possible if he returns to his former home.

Actions have consequences and your daughter needs to see that too.

[Arani]

You need to find your daughter. Your husband was totally out of line in leaving like that. I agree with what has been said, actions have consequences. He is corrupting your daughter's sense of morality and consideration. He seems, to me, a horrible parent. You should report him immediately.

That's just my opinion. The final decision's up to you. Good luck in this difficult situation.

[karma_lives]

He was wrong to do that, I think you should file the charges. If you're looking to find her before then, I live in Nevada so if there's anything at all I can do to help you, just let me know and I'll do my best! My thoughts are with you!

[emmunite]

My heart goes out to you and your family. It's a hard call to make. You could check the schools in the area where you think they are...see if she's registered there...not sure what documentation is needed, but, it's another avenue to try. Blessings to you and yours in this time of need.

[narleymarley03]

You and your family are in my thoughts. Do what must be done. Your daughter neds stability in her life.

[RavensEye]

I agree with the othres to file the charges and I will be holding you in my thoughts and prayers. Take care ok?

[Brigid Bishop]

I really feel for you.

She is still your daughter and she will come around once she matures...the problem is now that your ex is actually poisoning her, and he is breaking the law.

Although I hate dealing with the "instituition" you need to report him for many varied reasons.

You need to have documentation of this occurrence in the event there are problems in the future. If you fail to document, you will appear as if you are being neglectful.

He chose this path, let the chips fall where they may. Your daughter may be angry and resentful for your turning on the heat, but you need to exercise your parental rights and he is in stark violation of them.

If she becomes resentful of him and acts out and gets into trouble, which is likely, you will be held accountable for not reporting him. Honestly, I know, I've had a similiar experience with a step child.

I wish you peace of mind and my thoughts are with you.

[Brigid Bishop]

You can also search for him by his social, etc. via an internet service such as intellius.com.

If he is employed or has filed a change of address or even connected an unlisted phone number there are services that can find it for you.

[~Macha~]

he is also contributing to te deliquency of a minor. file the charges. as for her being mad for "getting her dad in trouble" she will eventually learn.
question- can she live with another realtive for awhile, after you find her? that might help the situation... just make sure they are "on your side"

[HorseCrow]

:hugz:

[Lady Jade]

Well, a new day and new developments...My attorney says that this is a crminal case and filing a report will set kidnapping charges and others into motion.

I spoke with her school and they confirm she has not been in attendance since the onset of this year, but there have been no requests for her records to be transferred. Dead end.

The ex mother in law is encouraging me to wait longer to give them the chance to call home to report their status, but I don't think more time will make them call home. My family is encouraging me to to search my heart for the answers, but no advice is really offered.

I want to make a couple more contacts, but I think tomorrow I will go make an official report and see what happens from there. I want to gather any remaining facts from the ex's other son and see if he knows anything, the more I can tell the police, the more they will have to go on.


tune in

[blueangel]

Your story has really moved me. It's shocking that your ex would do this to his own daughter. she must be really confused so I hope she comes home soon to all her family. I think that you have done the best you can and if, as you suspect, you aren't contacted very soon I don't think you have a choice but to report him.

Best wishes, my thoughts are with you.

[RavensEye]

My attorney says that this is a crminal case and filing a report will set kidnapping charges and others into motion Good I wish all the best and continuing to keep you in my prayers. And remember to take care of yourself to .(((((((((((Lady Jade)))))))))

[faerieridingdragons]

:hugz: I'm sending you some much needed energy.

[~*Ginger*~]

I spoke with her school and they confirm she has not been in attendance since the onset of this year, but there have been no requests for her records to be transferred. Dead end.
I'm suprised the school hasn't tried to contact someone about her not being in school!!
That carries consequences where I live, it should where you live as well...

Best of Luck!

[soilsigh aingeal]

:hugz: my heart is breaking for you. He has kidnapped your child, you have got to file the answers as soon as you can, you can give them remaining details after you've done that. Your children will grow up, understand, and then get over it and forgive you (hopefully not necissarily in that order), and when they have children of their own, they'll understand even better what happened and why you did what you did. You love them, and are concerned about their well being. Someone like this is not good for that. If you think it'll be necissary, set up arrangements for counselling when your daughter comes back, in case she needs it, I hope it doesn't come down to her running away after all is said and done. Don't let him turn your children against you. :hugz: :hugz: :hugz:

[Muireannach]

Hello,

After reading over your post a few times I have come to the conclusion that filing charges are for the best. In situations like this often times the individual wants control over the child. They often obtain control by creating a "special" bond with the child by creating a common enemy, be it be fabrication, or by half-truths. If you are to charge him with kidnapping and you get your daughter bach for the short term she may be uncontrollable (as teenagers can often times be) but in the long term you can at least say that you did what was best and moved her out of a situation where she was being manipulated and being shown a bad example and "life on the run." When she is an adult she will soon see more clearly into the situation and begin to understand.

Through all of this I would not forget your son as well. It seems like your son may have trust issues or have been a victim of manipulation as well. I recommend perhaps going to councilling or getting a male family member of friend (who is a good communicator and he trusts) to talk through the issues before they manifest into something bigger.

Finally take care of yourself. You are her mother and have every right to be in her life. Do not let him rob you of motherhood and make you feel helpless.

[WingedTigerChild]

If I seek to find her, my only recourse is to report her missing, which turns the Ex into a fugitive for kidnapping, even though he is her father and legal custodian (for school purposes only, otherwise we have shared parenting). If I choose to report, the kidnapping goes into effect whether I like it or not.

Hmm…I don’t know where you live or what the laws are there, but you said she’s fourteen, and where I live, any child twelve and over can legally choose the parent they wish to live with, so I find this situation a bit odd. I wonder if she was included in the decision-making or talked to about her rights? Even though she was younger at the time, she still deserved to know. Anyway, my heart goes out to you, and to her and your family.

[Lady Jade]

Hmm…I don’t know where you live or what the laws are there, but you said she’s fourteen, and where I live, any child twelve and over can legally choose the parent they wish to live with, so I find this situation a bit odd. I wonder if she was included in the decision-making or talked to about her rights? Even though she was younger at the time, she still deserved to know. Anyway, my heart goes out to you, and to her and your family.

I live in Ohio...here there is no age of consent and the court will always consider the child's feelings, that's why she is with him to begin with. He has poisoned her mind against me, she absolutely hates me...which I tell her that's ok to hate me, I have enough love for the both of us. No matter where I live, I know I have the right to know where my child is.

[Katfire]

First can I say that though I did not have a kidnapping with my children I have been in both places as a child of a broken home and my children come from a broken home.

When and if you get to speak to your child again (no if you will and I believe soon) and you are not worried about her being harmed in a physical way, and I hope that is the case.... May I suggest something like this to say on her return:

"It is not alright to hate because the harm falls to the child.."You my daughter" "You do not have to love me or your father but please do not hate! Find some understanding and when you have children of your own you will truely understand all that I feel for you. Children do not come with a book of instructions and I did the best I could with all the love I have. Please do not ever hate your father either for he is also doing the best he can though keeping you from me was unkind and unjust he must need you in his life so much that he would cause me to have this broken heart not to share in your very light."

I have great steparents and wonderful real parents that taught us that we have much love to share for everyone who cared for us. Now I am not saying there were no bumps in the road but in the end I was very lucky to have so much family.

You do what you have to do to make sure your daughter knows that you did not give up on wanting her, "no matter what they say" they (children) need to know that and that the battle is really between the Father and you not her. Do not add poison to poison for you both as parents may lose in the end.

Now with saying all that I have niece that is missing for over a year, she is about your daughters age, and we believe she was abducted by a stranger and could be dead. So thank the Gods that you know she is with her father somewhere and do some meditation on a return to me spell. She knows how to find you and she will come home someday just keep the candle burning to guide her home.

Much Love

Kat








I live in Ohio...here there is no age of consent and the court will always consider the child's feelings, that's why she is with him to begin with. He has poisoned her mind against me, she absolutely hates me...which I tell her that's ok to hate me, I have enough love for the both of us. No matter where I live, I know I have the right to know where my child is.

[Wulf Stormhand]

Well since you don't wish to involve the authorities. I'm a Private Process Server (I'm the goofball who serves you the divorce papers), and studying for my Private Investigators Lics., You could try to contact a local P.I. and they technically don't have to reveal any details to anyone but you, so no "authority" based repercussions, unless you decide to take it that route. All in all you would be totally surprised at how many resources there are available to Process Servers, P.I.'s, and Skip Tracers for finding missing people...

Brightest Blessings,
Wulf Stormhand

p.s. I hope everything works out for you!

[Lady Jade]

Wulf, I just had the same thought cross my mind about a PI, I know a thing or two about that myself having worked as a paralegal/investigator for a crminal defense attorney.

Well, went to file the report with the police and despite what my lawyer says, they insist this is a matter for family court, who can issue a warrant. They DID though take a report and followed me to their last known address. It was pretty bad, I didn't go in, but the cop thought he might be sick. There was no water electic, fridge, stove... and that the ex must have been trying to grow pot in his closet. There was a US map on the table without any markings. It seems nearest we can figure is that they left riding in a red chevy pick up and loaded a couple of boxes and 2 bicycles into the back possibly on Sept 26th. The police said they would continue to look people up, hopefully the court will issue a warrant, and not a bench warrant either.

Looks like we're in for a long expensive ride.

[misschief]

if it's severe... i don't mean to imply that it isn't, it obviously is... but if she could possibly be in danger is maybe a better way to put it, why don't they issue an amber alert?

[Lady Jade]

if it's severe... i don't mean to imply that it isn't, it obviously is... but if she could possibly be in danger is maybe a better way to put it, why don't they issue an amber alert?

They didn't even inquire was he armed, would she be safe...safe at best right now is a public shelter at night. He has no money, had nothing of value to sell, moreover, they have not contacted a soul who gives a damn about them. They could be dead between here and possibly Las Vegas, in a ditch or something. They would not let me file a missing persons report on the ex either...I tried that.

But this is a civil matter for the courts. They would not even fax a picture of her to the Las Vegas PD just to make me feel better.

[misschief]

o.......m........g. you know what? i tend to be kind of.... out there.......

but i would talk to my local media. i did it once over a legal matter concerning my kids, worked wonders. not saying you should... but i would.

[bridgewitch]

She does not meet the criteria for an amber alert because she is with a custodial parentCriteria for activating an AMBER ALERT

Law enforcement agencies ensure these conditions are met before activating an AMBER ALERT:

The investigating law enforcement agency confirms an abduction has occurred.
The victim is 17 years of age or younger, or has a proven mental or physical disability.
The victim is in imminent danger of serious injury or death. could a
There is information available that, if provided to the public, could assist in the child's safe recovery.

Now if you had documentation of a physical condition..the media is a good idea, but you would have to want to like be "details at 11" and all..and boy do they mean details!!!

[Llewyth]

FILE ALREADY! As for your daughter, great opportunity to teach her responsibility through example. She is not old enough to be making this kind of decision. And after the living conditions you mentioned, definately not mature enough. "Get 'er ma!"

[narleymarley03]

Could you contact the Las Vegas police and see if they could do anything on their end?

[Lady Jade]

So far, more dead ends. I am meeting with a lawyer on Friday next week and that is what I can do right now. Local police already nixed contacting Las Vegas PD citing the fact it is a very large city and they would not have any interest since this is a "custodial matter". So for now I am treading lightly for many reasons including if the media were involved and they found out, they would likely leave again and then I would have no clue where to find them. They can't fly under the radar forever. His SSN will surface soon and then we'll know where they are.

On a side note, my loving father informed me today my daughter was not worth a $1000 investment for a lawyer to get her back. He says let things be as they are and hope she calls. Some advice...

[GaiaDea]

It may be worth your while to call a skip tracer or PI in Vegas, as they have access, or can often GET access to security tapes from the city and casinos. The whole strip has cameras everywhere, as the Vegas PD are quite serious about keeping the strip safe from muggers and so forth. I know that all the casinos have cameras, and I also know from experience that the security divisions of the casinos are very nice and quite responsive to emails. It is possible that they may agree to keep a lookout for your ex and daughter as a "training exercise", if asked. It is worth a couple of emails to find out, at least.

Good luck, many blessings, and I know you will find them soon.

[Cappy]

:hugz: I can't believe this happened. It's just so.... so.... I can't even express it. If she doesn't want to live with you, that's fine. But she is still your daughter and you have every right to know where she is!. I hope you find her and get to talk to her about this. She can't hate you enough to never want to see you again. If that's what she says, then I don't buy it. I grew up with an abusive father, but I still love him. I even miss him! She doesn't hate you, I know it.

[~*Ginger*~]

It may be worth your while to call a skip tracer or PI in Vegas, as they have access, or can often GET access to security tapes from the city and casinos. The whole strip has cameras everywhere, as the Vegas PD are quite serious about keeping the strip safe from muggers and so forth. I know that all the casinos have cameras, and I also know from experience that the security divisions of the casinos are very nice and quite responsive to emails. It is possible that they may agree to keep a lookout for your ex and daughter as a "training exercise", if asked. It is worth a couple of emails to find out, at least.

Good luck, many blessings, and I know you will find them soon.
That's a good idea I think...
If you email them, send them a picture of them, it might help.

Best of Luck!
:hugz:

[Kalika]

:hugz:

I would report it to the authorities, most definitely.

And, if she comes back and you're worried about her running away, notify her school, her friends parents, and any local shelters that you may have, as well as the police.

[pixidust]

i would file charges. i don't know what else to say. :(

Agrees 100% She is your daughter too. And you have rights being a parent. Keep her in your life as long as possible. He had no right to do that what so ever! I hope for the best no matter what you do and hope she will pick up the phone and call.

Things have a way of working them selves out.

Brightest blessings to you. May the Goddess watch over and guide her to a safe return.

Pixi

[Lady Jade]

First of all, thanks to everyone who has responded here and also for your thoughts and prayers.

Ideally, I would just meet a PI out there and go look for her, but that takes money, of which none I have. At this time I cannot borrow from family and my credit record is bad. Today, I worked my last shift til January...my seasonal layoff. So money IS an object. As it is, I have an appointment Friday with a free Legal Aid attorney, who can force the Court to issue a warrant for his arrest (I hope) and get them found.

I am meeting with Salvation Army in the morning who has agreed to post my flyer if I come in, hopefully they will also agree to distribute them. I attached it here without the pic... I have been waiting on this pic from my mom, but she didn't get it to me before she left on vacation (that's a whole 'nother topic). So I gotta figure out how to get this scanner working now that I have found it and try to find a pic that will print clearly.

I think I'm going to Witchvox and email the flyer to covens. I have contacted National Center for Missing and Exploited children, but her status is not determined being that this is custodial. When we get the Court to decided to do something, arrrggghhh, this is really aggravating...waiting for other people to do something.

Anyways what if everyone here posted the flyer (complete with picture and/or Court approval) at just a couple of local places, like a shelter/soup kitchen/ truck stop in their area? That could be like 2500 flyers if only 1/4 of MW did it...

[~*Ginger*~]

What about school pictures?
Can you get ahold of the school and find out who the photographer was and see if he still has the negatives?
What about any of her friends, that live close by? Would any of them have pictures.

*just a thought*

[Erebus]

What, nobody's suggesting any magical avenues?

[~*Ginger*~]

What, nobody's suggesting and magical avenues?
We thought we'd let you take this one!

[Kalika]

:hugz: Lady Jade.

You and your daughter are in my thoughts... and I hope that the court gets a warrant out for him!!

[WynterSpirit]

OMG what a horrible situation that I can relate to in more than a few ways. I wouldn't let this go on any further without police/authorities involvement. He committed a crime, parental kidnapping, whether your daughter went along with it or not, it's not her decision, she's a minor. I'd file charges and push for his *ss to go to jail for it too. No mercy. What mercy did he show you or your child together by trying to corrupt her mind against and putting her in this situation? File those charges. Today.

[greenwitch]

file the report right now. Dont hesitate any longer. Regardless if she's living with that lunkhead or not, he violated the rules, all actions have consequences and he needs to learn that. He's not setting the best example for your daughter and we all know that. File the report, she's your daughter too.

blessings,
Adra

[Lady Jade]

file the report right now. Dont hesitate any longer. Regardless if she's living with that lunkhead or not, he violated the rules, all actions have consequences and he needs to learn that. He's not setting the best example for your daughter and we all know that. File the report, she's your daughter too.

blessings,
Adra

I did file the report, but the police won't get involved until the Court hears the case and issues a warrant. Right now I am in a holding pattern waiting on the Court and the lawyer to do their thing.

[WynterSpirit]

Damn. And it would be so easy for them to move inbetween now and when something is actually done. The courts and its officials should move FASTER on things like this. :mad:

[RavensEye]

Right now I am in a holding pattern waiting on the Court and the lawyer to do their thing. Gee do they not think you have better thigns to be doing then waiting... sorry you are going through this, by the way how are you doing ?

[GaiaDea]

Please do try emailing the casinos, perhaps starting with the Bellagio, as I have spoken via email with their head of security before and got a genuine, hand-typed response, typos and all. Do include a pic of them in your first email, not as an attachment, as most security folks automatically delete emails with attachments from unknown writers. I trulu believe they will be willing to help, as I said, especially if you ask if it can be done perhaps as part of training (they do visual tracking training on a daily basis, using stock photos of employees of other casinos, and patron pics from tape). That way, it is possible that you will be able to track them down for free, and tell the cops where they have been so they can be arrested and brought back more quickly. And if the courts do not think this is an important issue, well, you will have a place to start looking at least.

To get the email addys of the casinos, just google vegas casinos, then go to the individual web sites, and there is usually a "help", "faq", or "about us" page that will have the link for the security email addy. They don't get a huge amount of email from the public, so they don't have an automated form letter reply for inquiries. They go to an actual live person to be read. So email, and ask! The worst thing they will tell you is "no" and you are no worse off than before. On the other hand, it is possible that they can be located by the casinos in less than a day, and if several casinos track them, you may have a good idea of their daily movements, and can get them picked up, all from your own home. After all, in Vegas, everyone goes to the strip sometime, even if it is just to look. And the casinos have cameras to watch both inside and outside, so if they are just walking down the sidewalk, they will be seen by someone's cameras. (they are more paranoid than the military!)

Blessings!

[Lady Jade]

I got a phone call this morning from the local Police Department that they got an anonymous call from a middle aged woman on a cell phone in our local area with some information. She claims that the ex and my daughter ARE living in the Las Vegas area and that Salvation Army helped them get a place to live. She is supposed to call back tomorrow with more information. That is all I know. She would not leave her name or give the name of the town they are supposedly living in, only stated that it is a suburb of Las Vegas.

Otherwise, I am getting the full runaround from everywhere I turn.

1. Salavation Army (Las Vegas) will not tell me if they have helped the ex unless the Police call to inquire the same.
2. The Police will not call Salvation Army b/c this is a court matter
3. The Court referred me to a private attorney for assistance. I do have an appointment with an attorney tomorrow to discuss the case, but the Court has stated their first open court hearing date is not until mid November! By then, they could be gone.
4. Local sheriff's Dept. says there is an open Children's Services case in the county she lived.
5. Children's Services will not confirm or deny this claim, even though I am her mother. Moreover, they refused to provide any documentation if there is a case pending there citing confidentiality issues.

Will nobody help me find my child? I am so alone in this...

[RavensEye]

Lady Jade I have no advice to give, but I did wnat you to know I am still sending you as much enegry that I can. Try to hang in there.

[~*Ginger*~]

:hugz: & *child finding vibes*!

[redthewitch75]

It seems so overwhelming when the legal system sits around seemingly doing nothing. I can't believe nothing is being done here. Well, yes, I can. I know of some people who are dealing with the legal system and custody issues, and things aren't going the way that is most obvious for everyone involved. They are going the way of the negligent parent. Each and every time. She missed a court ordered drug test, still gets visitation. She lived with a known drug dealer, who attempted to kill her, still gets visitation. She misses 3 out 4 visits, I would dare say. And she still gets visitation. The list goes on. You would think that the courts would order her to supervised visits and parenting class and drug counseling,ect. But, no.
So, I really hope that your case turns out for the better.

[emmunite]

http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/pkpa.htm

I skimmed the contents...I did a search on parental kidnapping...

http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/pkpa.htm

http://www.missingkids.com/missingkids/servlet/PageServlet?LanguageCountry=en_US&PageId=200

Hope these may help...Don't give up. Although it seems that everything's working agianst you and you keep running into walls...you're going to get through. Your perseverance is evidant in all you've been doing. Blessings to you and the safe return of your daughter.

[Lady Jade]

Well, I went o my long awaited appointment ot get told they would not help either. It seems that since the Court needs an address to mail the contempt charges to and we have no address for him, then this attorney is unwilling to "waste the court's time" with a frivolous matter. The only other recourse is to find an attorney I have to pay (last one was free) that is willing to fight to get the Court to allow us to notify him of custody proceedings via newspaper ads for a period of six more weeks, so we are talking another 2 months here.... Then the custody issues would proceed through the Court and eventually I get legal custody and then and only then will they list her as missing. I have contacted these following agencies with no help:

Children' Services
Private Attorney
Child Support Services
Legal Aid
City Police Dept
County Police Dept.
Ohio's Missing Children's Clearinghouse
National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
Salvation Army
Family Court (presiding)
Welfare Office
Public School (who failed to report her now 8 week truancy!)

Every place I have turned I get passed off to someone who finally says they can't help me. This is crazy, are there no real laws to protect the non residential parent? How can this situation be so infrequent that our legislature has not addressed it?

I think the only avenues left to me are pretty "out there" and I am again not sure how to proceed. I can call the press and hope they will help, but that's pretty public and I am not a public person. If the news ran the story, would my ex and daughter run away again or deeper into hiding? I don't know if I am prepared for a media circus.

I could also call a PI to see if they can track them down. Again money is a consideration. Hopefully a PI could tell me where they are if they are ok and I could just show up and suprise them. This seems like the best idea so far. We can hope he is easy to find but there are no credit cards, bank accounts, passports, school records have not been requested, they have no money, so shelters and soup kitchens are a good bet. All the same, we don't know where they really are to even begin to look. somewhere is the US, maybe Las Vegas.

I feel like I have exhausted all avenues and still there are no answers. I still do not even know if she is alive. I try to keep my mind from rehearsing scenarios of what could happen to an old man and a young girl on the streets of Las Vegas or somewhere. Going to bed not knowing is the worst, when I sleep I dream of them in nightmarrish (sp) situations. Anything is possible, he is not a good parent and she would do anything he asked of her and more. I can see her suggesting possible ways to make money and him letting her if SHE thought it was ok.

I will decide by Monday what to do after talking to my extended family. So far, my dad has already said "she is not worth the investment" in regard to the expense of an attorney. My mom went on vacation last week. My sister is concerned enough to check on me and if I need her to do anything. She went with me to try to file a police report. However, she has 3 kids and a recent marriage breakup to deal with. That's about it. You guys here at MW are a big help just letting me vent and say to someone who cares what is going on, thanks all!

[RavensEye]

You guys here at MW are a big help just letting me vent and say to someone who cares what is going on, thanks all! And we always will be as long as you need use. I really am just baffled that all those agnecies cannot help you in anyway. But as I said we are here for you. Just let us know what we could do.

Hey I know this is a far fetched idea, but for those of us who have web sites would you consider that route of putting a picture up of you daughter with description? It was just an idea. I would put one up on my web site. You never know it could work.

[Shatril]

Oh Jade I'm so sorry to hear this. I don't know where I've been lately, but this is the first time I've seen this. What a mess. I don't have any advice, but I will certainly hide in the cave with you and comfort you.

Love Shatril

[RavensEye]

Any updates?:sadman:

[Lady Jade]

Not, really, thanks for asking. See continuing info at this MW thread in energy requests:

http://www.mysticwicks.com/showthread.php?t=70941

That's where I have been posting the new info.

[Wolf Dancer]

It can be as simple as that. The atomic fallout from hauling her back here won't be. I am calling my lawyer tomorrow to discuss all possible avenues. In the meantime, more advice is welcomed.

Edit* The court papers state that neither of us is allowed to move from the address listed on the pleadings without previously notifying the other parent and the court. Maybe this is custodial interference? But that won't get her home.


:hugz: I understand the position your are in. I went thru it with my stepdaughter that I raised. She was 15, follow your instincts and do what you have to do to get her home safe!! I don't want to discourage you but, almost all parents end up fightin with their kids when they are teens. And in the blended families of today, it makes it easy for one to play one against the other.
:flamer: As for your ex......the worm will turn on him.

If you haven't heard anything yet, and you have tried all that has been suggested, all you can do is wait for her to call you. My daughter was finally found almost 6 months later....after pickin up a puppy, she went to the store and got busted for shoplifting.

I feel for you, for I know the feeling of looking at the phone willing it to ring....then when it rings you don't know if you want to answer it for fear of bad news.

I am dressing a candle for you and your children, sending energy to you. Take care of yourself.

[QUEEN OF THE DAMNED]

My best wishes to you when you are in need. I did a similar thing to my own mother when I was 16, but without my fathers influence. I just want to let you know, my mother was very tough with me then and got me back home. I ran away again and soon found out that if I wanted to eat that I had to move back home. I learned the hard way, but now we have a great relationship and I am so grateful to her for being strict when I needed it. Your daughter wont understand when you first do it, but I think all you can do is try (report him, file charges) and take it from there. That way your conscience will be clear, because you have done all you can. I know it is a horrible situation and you dont want to put a foot wrong. But I think in a few years your daughter will thank you for it. Good luck and keep us posted!