How did you know it was time?

[Memory's Flame]

How did you and your significant other know that the time was right to start a family? (IE Have children)

[Aowyn]

How did you and your significant other know that the time was right to start a family? (IE Have children)
When the universe snuck that baby into me...

[HorseCrow]

When the universe snuck that baby into me...


:lol: :lol:

[Raven Reed]

When the universe snuck that baby into me...

Ditto. Twice!

[Serendipity]

No planning for us either - it just happened.

[Ceres]

i felt like i couldnt wait any longer to meet my children. this happened with #2 and #3 and then i felt like everyone had arrived. like a party but noisier ;)

[Shanti]

Let me see, the first times....I got married and we wanted kids!

The second time....20 years later....new SO and we wanted kids!!!
:)

I figure the right time for me and my SO is when we both want them!!! :)

[fahawk]

I doubt there is the "perfect" time ever- there always could be 100 reasons it wasnt the right time..

[Strega Del Vento]

Whew.. Let's see.. First marriage, we had gotten married and decided that if a pregnancy happened, it would. We of course weren't taking any precautions against it. Three months later, we were pregnant with our first (a Son). When our son turned 1, I really really wanted another baby. Turns out, my husband did too! So, we tried right away, and our Daughter was born 22 months after our son. So, almost a 2-year age difference. During the birth of our daughter (by C-Section, she was a breech *butt-first*), I had requested that my tubed be tied. We were done having children. We had one of each, so we didn't feel the need to have more. The doctor of course, refused to do it because I was only 19 at the time. (Yes, married young, at 16!).

That was certainly a blessing in disguise, because our marraige lasted a total of 7 years. Two years later, I remarried. But, before my husband and I married, we suffered a tubal pregnancy. We didn't mean to get pregnant, and were protecting ourselves. But, nothing's 100%. So, 2 1/2 months into the pregnancy, we found it to be an ectopic (pregnancy in the tubes). Luckily, it had termed itself out on its own, because in most cases, when an ectopic ruptures, it can be fatal to the woman.

After we married (about 7 months later), we knew that we wanted to actually "try" to have a child together. It took us 6 months, but we finally got pregnant!

I'm totally rambling now.. LOL.. In summary though, I believe that you just "know" when it's time. I've never taken finances into account when planning to have children. In my opinion, there's never enough money for ANYTHING, no matter what you do. So finances never played a part in our plans.

[Magicfuzzies]

I agree, you just know.

My husband had been trying to convince me since before we were married (he wants 5 but I told him that I'm willing to have 2. Any more than that and he has to find someone else to have them :hahugh: ). Finances weren't good so I didn't want to try yet but something in me just said "it's time".

When it's time, it's time.

[Arinya]

I'm only 19 but my SO sometime goes on little dreamy thoughts about kids and talks about having them. He's 28, we've been together 2 1/2 years but we've both agreed that we aren't having any children until I'm out of college and we move out west where we both have a strong calling towards. That and we're both financially prepared for it. That is in my opinion the only problem with an age difference, I think as you get older you are more likely to want children because of that feeling that time is running out.

[Amethyst Rose]

Well.... I was in the Caribbean and I ran out of birth control. I didn't bother to go and get more, and my husband and I didn't take any other precautions against getting pregnant. However, it wasn't a conscious decision to have a baby...it was just laziness.
Two weeks before I found out I was pregnant, (so I was actually pregnant at the time), my husband and I had a conversation. I was worried that he never wanted kids, and the idea of never having them made me cry, (that's how I knew I was ready). He assured me that some day in the next couple of years he'd want kids, just not right at that moment.
When it turned out that I was pregnant, and I told him, I was terrified that he'd be upset, because of our earlier conversation. He ended up being really happy and excited, and I was so relieved. :)
I plan on trying to have a second child in 2 years, simply because I know I want two kids and I know I want them to be 3-4 years apart in age. At times, however, I get worried about having a second and I wonder how I'll handle it.... that's how I know I'm not ready for a second one yet. :)

[Ben Trismegistus]

When three of our really good friends (and covenmates) got pregnant within the space of three months, we figured there was no time like the present.

I guess you could say we succumbed to peer pressure.

[Tarbh Nathroch]

We didn’t. We and everyone else were always saying. Wait until you can “do it right” or “when you’re prepared”, “when you’re ready” and the like. Then one day while talking about it we came to the realization who is ever ready, what right time and you can’t prepare for that kind of life changing event. So we just did it. Because we wanted to have a family, we had seven years of couple time so why not now. My biggest argument for it was, at some point my kid is going to kick my ass. I would like that to happen around the age of 19 not 9.

[Kalika]

We had been wanting to for awhile... and finally realized that if we waited for the PERFECT time... well, we'd be waiting forever. So, we decided to go ahead and start trying... and now here we are. :lol:

[Aleigh]

When the universe snuck that baby into me...
Same here. :D The second one was planned though...soon as we moved into a house big enough for more than one.

[KimberSly]

Well, we've talked about it for so long. I do not want to have kids unless we can support them and give them the life we would have wanted when we were kids. I don't want to have to scrape by... so we're going to wait until we are financially stable.

As for mentally... heck, I'd get him in bed right now. :lol:

[LadyMoreta]

when i got pregnant....all three times. :bigblue:

[botea]

When the universe snuck that baby into me...
I just woke my 2yr old daughter up laughing lol

Our son just 'happened'... our daughter we ttc'd for 8months

[Mab]

I just know. Though................not overly sure who the daddy'll be.....

[Memory's Flame]

:D

DH and I are currently Trying... we just woke up one morning and though "Gee, We'd really like kids!"

[LadyTrinity]

I met the right guy and the spiritual bond was so intense I just knew :smoochypo

[FlyingBear]

Sometimes you just know.........

And then sometimes you get lazy and think that it'll be ok that you skip the birth control " just this once"
Don't want the birth control to "interrupt the moment"
Think that having a baby is what you're supposed to do, " the next logical step"
You believed that you couldn't get pregnant having sex for the first time
Decide that since everyone else is having one, what the hell...
Didn't bother to read up on where babies come from and figure that God will give you one.
Thought that maybe having a baby would make your relationship between you and your "other" better..
Figured that it would be the best way " to keep your man"
You were told that you couldn't get pregnant when on your period and whoops!
Had too much wine...
Smoked too much weed...
Had too many drugs...
It was prom night ( which explains why so many weddings happen in June, cause prom tends to be in May )
Cause your parents are *dying* to be grandparents


But hey, I'm just snarky! What would I know?

:tub:

[Aowyn]

Sometimes you just know.........

And then sometimes you get lazy and think that it'll be ok that you skip the birth control " just this once"
Don't want the birth control to "interrupt the moment"
Think that having a baby is what you're supposed to do, " the next logical step"
You believed that you couldn't get pregnant having sex for the first time
Decide that since everyone else is having one, what the hell...
Didn't bother to read up on where babies come from and figure that God will give you one.
Thought that maybe having a baby would make your relationship between you and your "other" better..
Figured that it would be the best way " to keep your man"
You were told that you couldn't get pregnant when on your period and whoops!
Had too much wine...
Smoked too much weed...
Had too many drugs...
It was prom night ( which explains why so many weddings happen in June, cause prom tends to be in May )
Cause your parents are *dying* to be grandparents


But hey, I'm just snarky! What would I know?

:tub:
lol those are true for some people but you left one out sometimes you think that you aren't able to and the Universe says "hehehe wanna bet?" and you get "ninja babied" so to speak.
All snarkiness aside though.
The truth is what some have already stated sometimes you just know.
There are always millions of reasons not to have a baby so if you are thinking of waiting for a time where there isn't ie that "perfect" time then you could very well end up never having a child at all. Make a list of the things that are most important to you and see how a child would fit in to that list that's what I would do.

[FlyingBear]

lol those are true for some people but you left one out sometimes you think that you aren't able to and the Universe says "hehehe wanna bet?" and you get "ninja babied" so to speak.
All snarkiness aside though.
The truth is what some have already stated sometimes you just know.
There are always millions of reasons not to have a baby so if you are thinking of waiting for a time where there isn't ie that "perfect" time then you could very well end up never having a child at all. Make a list of the things that are most important to you and see how a child would fit in to that list that's what I would do.


LOL O I agree. I just hafta get my snark spike out once in a a while and do some poking with it.

I don't know of anyone who could honestly say that they were 100% ready for everything that would entail with a wee bairn. And I don't think that waiting for that moment is such a good idea either, because it really never comes when you think it will.

Babies are an absolute joy, but the responsibility can scare the stuffings out of the strongest heart. I would suggest that you do all the research you can before hand. If you want some links, PM me and I'll send you the oddles I have bookmarked.

Just do it when you're ready and only you will be able to decide when that is. But you know you'll get support around here! Lots of helpful parents here who know all to well the love and dedication that is a child.

[Amethyst Rose]

I don't know of anyone who could honestly say that they were 100% ready for everything that would entail with a wee bairn. And I don't think that waiting for that moment is such a good idea either, because it really never comes when you think it will.



Yup. I'm of the belief that if I'd waited until I was "ready" to have kids, I'd never have had them, and probably never would. There'd always be something else that I'd have to get ready.... more money, better house, establish a career...etc.

[BethieRose]

Our first just...happened. We were actually trying to prevent, but the Universe took over!

The two boys were planned, though. My second was born two years and two weeks after our first. We were so enthused about the idea of having another, despite the financial situation taking a sharp downturn after we found out we were pregnant.

The second boy was born one year and several months after our second child's death. I worried that it was too soon, but at the same time we both *really* wanted to have another baby. Well, I had a lot of irrational anxieties while pregnant with #3, who can blame me? In any case, he's a great little guy and I"m so glad we have him!

I tend to agree with the thought that if you wait for the "right time" the right time will never come, as far as finances and jobs and homes go. Emotionally, well, there often is a right time. And sometimes, the Universe decides it's time. lol. Once you have them, you fight tooth and nail to give them all that they *need*, and you often discover that its much less than you want to give them or that they want you to give them. ;)

[Stardevil]

Well personally we did nto know it was time. We met in October of 1999 were engaged in December.. My Birthday was January and on my hubby's birthday (before we were married) In February 2000 I foudn out I was pregnant. We were not even trying. I was on the pill, we had condoms and more. It jsut happened. My son turns 4 tomorrow and honestly it has been the best 4 years :) We ar ento having any other children though untill after I finish college or if it jsut "happens" then it will happen.