Getting my daughter off the paci

[FaerieGothMommy]

My daughter is 27 months old and still has a pacifier/dummy, well today we went out and she left her dummy somewhere, so it's lost! We get home and shes tired, so she wants her dummy to have a nap, we tell her its lost so she has to go nap with just her blanket. We thought, she has to come off it sooner or later, so we'll try now, seen as we lost her dummy.
Anyway, it took us LOTS of screaming, kicking, crying until she finally dropped off to sleep! And the only reason she dropped off, was because she had NO energy left....
But we also have a 3month old son, and so if we have this trouble everytime she needs to go sleep we'll also have trouble trying to see to ethan aswel.
Does anyone have any suggestions in other ways to get her off the dummy? She does have a blanket, but thats not enough for her, it's like, 1 is no good without the other. We tryed putting her radio on, playing lullabys with her light up teddy....
I really don't want this everytime she needs to go sleep, it's upsetting to watch aswel, that she just gets so tired and upset she has absoloutly no energy left!!!!
We even tryed her with a different dummy, but she will not have any other dummy it has to be her dummy (which she lost) so we obviously can't give that to her, but shes getting to old for a dummy now.

PLEASE HELP!!!

[Shanti]

I personally let all my children give up security items when they were ready to just leave them and forget them. They all did it very slowly over time. I am a perent that just doesnt set time lines on some issues with my kids such as security issues.
Thats just the way I am.
Out of 5 kids, each let go of their pacifiers at differant ages and differant speeds. One just lost interest about 1 yrs old and on the far side of the spectrum, my youngest son is functionaly autistic and still needs it at bed time and he is 4. But the rest averaged around the 2 ish bracket when they began to loose interest. I think its easier if its not made an issue of.
But thats just me, my way of doing things is deffinately not for everyone. I just never saw a reason to encourage them to surrender their attachment. They seem to just grow out of it with out the struggle.
:)

[Ceres]

i am with shanti, but u cant let her have the item she wants because its not in your power - its lost :(
i would try telling her how much you wish she could have her pacifier and how u can see how sad she is it got lost. instead of trying to convince her she doesnt need it, agree with her that its terrible she cant have it and offer a replacement of another one or something else.
there is a book called "the last noo-noo" by jill murphy about a boy and his pacifier that might help her see lots of kids like their dummies and someday her affair with her dummy will end lol. none of my kids had pacifiers (except my breast lol) but they loved this book anyway.

[Gwenhwyfar]

I agree too, my daughter did everything on her own time, and it was never far off from when I thought it was time. Id get a few differant kinds and let her choose.

[FaerieGothMommy]

Well, we ended up with about 8 different paci's :lol: as she wouldnt settle with certain ones, eventually she chose some she liked.
I've just ordered her some of the same ones as the one she lost too, they are not that easy to find.
I agree with you all actually, ive been thinking i should leave her to it, let her give it up when she wants, but you know how society can be, they think children should have set times for everything!! The paci she loves is orthodontic though, and its designed so it won't ruin her developing mouth.
Thanks for your input :) at least shes settled with different ones until her fave pacis get here :)

[Ceres]

if anyone gives u a hard time about it, u can reply that adults are allowed their oral comfort items like cigarettes and alcohol, pens and gum and toothpicks , so she can have hers too!

[Pandoras]

I don't have kids, but I'll share the experiences I've had with my sister's kids (who live upstairs).

My oldest niece (now 8) abandoned her pacifier at about 6 months old. She just lost interest. My second niece (now 6) didn't begin to let it go until she started kinder, and she still uses it sometimes. The only real problem that we (my mom, my sister, and I - hey, it takes a village, right?) see with it is that her front teeth are being affected. She's becoming somewhat buck-toothed. Her doctor agrees, but since they're only her baby teeth, it's not a huge deal. Besides, she's too old now for us to simply take her pinkie (as she calls it) away. My nephew, now almost 3, uses his religiously.

I agree with Shanti and the other moms about letting the child let go of the pinkie when ready. It will happen eventually.

[FaerieGothMommy]

Well, like i said my daughter takes orthodontic ones, sometimes she will have a regular/cheap one temporarily, but i make sure her permanent paci's are orthodontic. So, her teeth should be ok, i hope!!!

Thanks for your advice

[WingedTigerChild]

My youngest sister didn't give up her pacifier until she was about 3 and a half. Like the others said, let her give it up of her own accord. I find most children usually don't until they're 3 anyway.

[Ceres]

i sucked my thumb till i was 13...thats not a typo either! my teeth are wonderful (i didnt even need braces)and we have gone thru several dentists over the years and all of them have agreed - pacifier damage was overblown.
one dentist even said he has seen cases where the thumb sucking or paci use helped push out the teeth of a kid who would have otherwise had an underbite.