Psi-vamp!

[Garden of Eden]

A few years back I left a school and a friend and I lost contact. We weren't terribly close, and it wasn't a huge loss to me. I didn't hear from her for five years, when suddenly a few months ago she called me. We spent an hour on the phone, her telling me all about her troubles and her life. Since then she contacts me every few weeks to whinge about how terribly everything is going. She just complains. Constantly.

She called me an hour ago... and I suddenly realised I could almost feel her draining me of energy. I made my excuses and hung up, feeling drawn and depressed. This happens every time I speak to her and I've only just caught on that she's obviously a psychic vampire...

I really don't want to have to talk to her at all anymore. But I'm not sure how to end contact... any advice? :ugh:

[Rick]

Is caller ID available in your area? Answering machine to screen the calls?

Um... if someone can drain you like that via telephone, either they are extraordinarily powerful, or you need to boost your shielding level... IMO, anyway.

[Garden of Eden]

No caller ID here, unfortunately.

I probably do need to work on my shielding, but I think she does have a very strong pull. I know for a fact that most people avoid spending time around her because she tends to leave them feeling drained and quite lethargic too.

[Calen]

I don't know anything about psychic vampires. Does it mean that someone actively sucks out your energy to compensate for their own unhappiness, or that the person complaining constantly makes you feel negative and drained, without them knowing what they are doing? Is this different from just feeling depressed after hearing about other people's troubles?

[blindfaith^_^]

I would suggest that you work on your psychic sheilding, but I would also try to cleasne myself of all negative eneries and ties too. You could do a meditation where you focused on clearing any negative energies and ties (one good way to cut ties is to picture a sword cutting all negative ties from you and then picturing flames burning the ends of the ties to keep them from snaking back). Of course any work on your sheilding is always a goo call as well.

Then there is the nonmagical solution that includes telling her that you can't talk to her so much anymore. You could say that you were really busy to talk, or to stressed with your own problems to help her right now. Then you could appologize and say you will call her when you have more time/are less stressed. That might stop her from calling you.

[morrigan]

i think you will find that if you work on your shielding then her calls will eventually stop.. if she's an intentional psi-vamp then they will stop very quick as she will realise after one or two calls that she cant drain you anymore and if shes an unintentional vamp then it could just be as simple as when she feels low she knows that for some reason talking to you makes her feel better.. a few calls where she doesnt pick up after may cause her to ease up on the calls.. and if not if you have yourself shielded it shouldnt matter too much anyway as she wont drain you any more..
I had to do this with my grandmother as she was aways draining me even when she called on the phone once i put up protections for myself she stopped calling me at all hours of the day and night and now when i visit her its alot more pleasant for me and so i go more often now instead of avoiding her..i know it sounds bad because she was my grandmother but after her visiting her i would end up so bad it would take a couple of days to even have the energy to get out of bed..
if you can get a crystal necklace and wear it all the time then you will always have some sort of defence if she catches you off guard one day..if memory serves me correctly lapis lazuli is a good one for that.. its a very effective protective stone and helps with psychic power too..
Blessed Be ~Morrigan~

[Cev'aq]

This has happened to me, as well. I did the blunt thing... "Goodbye." *shrugs*

[dr_zeus440]

if it was me, id find the person a psychologist. sounds like her problems and the need to whine about them are taking over her life. if you can get her counselling for her problems, then the need to drain energy/whine should fade. treat the problem at its source.

[AlAskendir]

In my experience, what psy vamps need is that sense that they are taking energy from you against your will, dragging it out of you, dumping their mental shite and depressions on you...but you don't have to accept them. It can take a bit of practise to get the balance exactly right, but a combination of having an amazing amount of continually replenished positive energy flowing thru you while you interact with them, asking them slightly ' New Age psychological ' questions (Like her = 'whine, whine, whine!', your response = 'Umhum...And why do you think you chose to have that experience?')

To get the energy just right, when she calls you, begin doing the Fountain excercise below. To get the questions right, read up on Neuro lingistic Programming techniques and Ernest Holmes' Science of Mind or Richard Bach's Illusions (adventures of a reluctant Messiah).


First
Create a point of Power:
....Imagine that a tiny pin-point of energy as bright as a star is
.........going to appear when you 'tell' it to,
....Focus your attention on a certain spot you can see,
....Inhale 'knowing' that it is going to be as you will it,
....And exhale 'telling' the point of power to come into existence.
.................Watch the point of power, mentally 'tell' it to
....................move and watch it float around.

Then
'Tell' your point of power to bounce back and forth between your
....main hand's thumb-tip and index fingertip. Watch it for a
....couple of breaths, then 'tell' it to go faster...and faster...
....and faster! By now, it should seem to be a 'solid' line of light.
'Tell' your line of power to start spinning in place. Watch it for a
....couple of breaths, then 'tell' it to go faster...and faster...
....and faster! By now, it should seem to be a 'solid' disc of light.
'Tell' your disc of power to start spinning the other way. Watch it
....for a couple of breaths, then 'tell' it to go faster...and....
....faster.....and faster! By now, it should seem to be a 'solid'
....ball of light.
Holding your ball of light with one hand, grab the other side of it
....with your other hand, knowing that when you pull the 'two
....halves' apart, you'll then have two balls of light,,you'll just
....be making a copy....
Pull one copy off of the first ball, and 'stick' it in the air
....nearby. Do that another seven times.
......(note for purists, the chakra locations I use Reiki calls
.......the 'developing chakra-s', and may not be the same as what ...
.......or where the Chakras are clasically considered to be.)
Push the first ball of light into your own chest in the vicinity
....of your heart. Grab one of the others and push it half into
....the top of your head. Grab another ball of light and push it
....halfway into your forehead. Grab another and push it halfway
....into the base of your throat. Grab another and push it into your
....stomach area. Grab another and push it into your groin. Grab the
....second to last one and push it into the floor between your feet.
Take a couple of breaths, get used to how all of that is, and then...
'Tell' the last ball to fly straight up about 5 miles, and then North
....about a mile and a half. 'Tell' it to fly clockwise in a circle
....centered on you. Breathe thru a couple of these orbits. Then
....'tell' it to fly faster and faster and faster, until it forms an
....apparently 'solid' ring of light about five miles above you.
....Now as you inhale, streamers of light come spiraling down to the
....ball in the top of your head. As you exhale you realize that a
....gigantic cone of light has formed in the sky above you, and
....within that cone as you exhale, all forms of energy (sunlight,
....cosmic rays, radio waves, heat, microwaves, etc) transform into
....astral/ psychic energy and come cascading down the funnel.

................(Now the real fun starts!)...................

Inhale and feel the energy get pulled into that ball in the top of
....your head; Exhale and feel more energy come cascading down as the
....ball in the top of your head begins to spin in place; Inhale and
....feel more energy get pulled into the ball; Exhale and feel even
....more energy come cascading down as the ball in the top of your
....head begin glowing; Inhale and feel much more energy get pulled
....down the cone into the glowing, spinning ball of light in the
....top of your head; Exhale, feel the ball in the top of your head
....being completely full, and feel the energy flow down over that
....ball and down to the next one in the middle of your forehead.
Inhale and feel the energy get pulled into that ball in the middle
....of your head; Exhale and feel more energy come down to the
....ball in the middle of your forehead begins to spin in place;
....Inhale and feel more energy get pulled into the ball; Exhale and
....feel even more energy come into the ball in the middle of your
....forehead begin glowing; Inhale and feel much more
....energy get pulled down the cone and past the top, full,
....spinning, glowing ball of light in the top of your head into the
....glowing, spinning ball of light in the middle of your forehead
....Exhale, feel the ball in the middle of your forehead being
....completely full, and feel the energy flow down over that
....ball and down to the next one in the base of your throat.
Inhale and feel the energy get pulled into that ball in the base of
....your throat; Exhale and feel more energy come cascading down as
....the ball in the base of your throat begins to spin in place;
....Inhale and feel more energy get pulled into the ball; Exhale and
....feel the ball in the base of your throat begin glowing; Inhale
....and feel much more energy get pulled down the cone, past the top
....glowing, spinning ball, past the forehead glowing, spinning ball,
....into the glowing, spinning ball of light at the base of your
....throat; Exhale, feel the ball at the base of your throat being
....completely full, and feel the energy flow down over that
....ball and down to the next one in your heart.
Inhale and feel the energy get pulled into that ball in your heart;
....Exhale and feel more energy come cascading down to the ball
....in your heart and feel it begin to spin in place;
....Inhale and feel more energy get pulled into the ball; Exhale and
....feel the ball in your heart begin glowing; Inhale and feel much
....more energy get pulled down the cone, past the top glowing,
....spinning ball, past the forehead glowing, spinning ball,
....past the glowing, spinning ball of light at the base of your
....throat, into the glowing, spinning ball of light in your heart;
....Exhale, feel the ball in your heart being completely full, and
....feel the energy flow down over that ball and down to the next
....one in your stomach.
Inhale and feel the energy get pulled into that ball in your
....groin; Exhale and feel more energy come cascading down to the
....ball in your groin and feel it begin to spin in place;
....Inhale and feel more energy get pulled into the ball; Exhale and
....feel the ball in your groin begin glowing; Inhale and feel much
....more energy get pulled down the cone, past the top glowing,
....spinning ball, past the forehead glowing, spinning ball,
....past the glowing, spinning ball of light at the base of your
....throat, past the glowing, spinning ball of light in your heart,
....past the glowing, spinning ball of light in your stomach, into
....the glowing, spinning ball of light in your groin;
....Exhale, feel the ball in your groin being completely full, and
....feel the energy flow down over that ball and down to the next
....one in the floor between your feet.
Inhale and feel the energy get pulled into that ball in the floor
....between your feet; Exhale and feel more energy come cascading
....down into the floor between your feet and feel it begin to spin
....in place; Inhale and feel more energy get pulled into the ball;
....Exhale and feel the ball in the floor between your feet begin
....glowing; Inhale and feel much more energy get pulled down the
....cone, past the top glowing, spinning ball, past the forehead
....glowing, spinning ball, past the glowing, spinning ball of light
....at the base of your throat, past the glowing, spinning ball of
....light in your heart, past the glowing, spinning ball of light in
....your stomach, past the glowing, spinning ball of light in your
....groin, into the spinning, glowing ball of light in the floor
....between your feet; Exhale, feel the ball in the floor between
....your feet grow larger; Inhale and feel more energy get pulled
....into the ball; Exhale, feel the ball in the floor between
....your feet grow larger; Inhale and feel more energy get pulled
....into the ball; Exhale, feel the ball in the floor between
....your feet grow larger, until it touches your feet; Inhale and
....feel more energy get pulled into the ball; Exhale, feel the ball
....in the floor between your feet become comepletely full,
....and 'roots' of light begin spiraling downward into the earth.
Inhale and feel the energy running down from the sky, thru you, and
....into the ball in the floor between your feet; Exhale and feel
....your roots grow longer, spiraling down thru the magma toward the
....center of the earth; Inhale and feel the energy running down
....from the sky, thru you, and into the ball in the floor between
....your feet; Exhale and feel your roots grow longer, spiraling
....into the white hot center of the planet...
Suddenly, feel Gaea turn her attention to your existence...
And the polarity of your flowing energy flips...
The direction of the flow reverses, and as you Inhale, comes shooting
....straight up to you, straight up thru you to the top of your head;
Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all around
....you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy pooled at
....your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor between your
....feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top of your head.
....Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all
....around you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy
....pooled at your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor
....between your feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top
....of your head....
Now breathe a little faster.....
Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all around
....you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy pooled at
....your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor between your
....feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top of your head.
....Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all
....around you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy
....pooled at your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor
....between your feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top
....of your head....
And breathe faster!
Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all around
....you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy pooled at
....your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor between your
....feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top of your head.
....Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all
....around you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy
....pooled at your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor
....between your feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top
....of your head....
and faster and faster!
Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all around
....you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy pooled at
....your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor between your
....feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top of your head.
....Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all
....around you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy
....pooled at your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor
....between your feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top
....of your head....
now breathe as fast as you possibly can!
Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all around
....you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy pooled at
....your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor between your
....feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top of your head.
....Exhale and feel the energy burst forth and cascade down all
....around you, to pool at your feet. Inhale and feel the energy
....pooled at your feet get pulled into the ball in the floor
....between your feet, and pulled up thru you to the ball in the top
....of your head....
Exhale and feel the energy shoot back up into the sky...and let go
....of all your imaging, and normalize your breathing....


That was the Fountain.....have fun!

[Garden of Eden]

Thanks for all the advice guys, especially for that reeeeeally long one at the end ;) I'm going to consider this a little while longer before I act.
~Eden