I need spiritural advice on my problem...

[WillowPhenix]

I have several problems. I'm bipolar with general anxiety disorder, and I'm addicted to cutting myself. I'm recieving medical and psychiatric help, but I 'm not sure how this will affect me spiriturally. I spent Yule in the psych ward of my local hospital, and overdosed the weekend before. I'm doing better now, but still pretty bad. Someone give me advice please?

[Faeawyn]

I've pm'd you :)

[Aquarian_Moon]

Well, not to say that you can't become what most psychiatrists would say, ahem... b.e.t.t.e.r, I think you have to just be careful with what you do to yourself. Sometimes you can never really defeat the desires, unless you're on medication for your entire life, which a lot of people are (thank goodness I'm not despite being suicidal many times before). But in my own experience, medication is very bad thing for me spiritually (as well as being hospitalized - it only happened to me once, when I was 18). The medication just didn't make me feel like myself, and there were some pretty bad side effects too. But if YOU truly need it, to avoid hurting yourself permanently, then it should be up to your own intuition.

I believe in this very thin line between being 'sick' and 'crazy', and it doesn"t seem like you're sick, just a bit crazy like all of us are, but in different ways. Some people drink to relieve stress/feel happy, some people cut themselves, and some hurt others (the worst coping mechanism there is in my view). Just be careful how you go about it, so you don't do anything which you might deeply regret. If you can defeat the desires however, that's even better!

But there doesn't seem to be much of a choice there for you, so try the medication/counselling for a little while, because you need to make the decision for yourself whether it helps or not, and perhaps it will. So give it a shot. :)

[William]

Greetings WillowPhenix,

I suffer from a condition as well. This condition was only in the last few months diagnosed and I am now on medication. My life has changed dramatically for the better. The only problem that I have faced since starting on the medication is the reaction that I have received from some Pagans and New Agers.

These reactions range from "how could you poision yourself with that stuff", "It affects your mind and your spiritual being", "the modern medical profession is only interested in curing the symtoms and not healing the problem, you should seek spiritual healing" and of course my personal favorite "you shouldn't take the medication because the pharmacutical industry is so corrupt and you are just supporting them". Most of this from people that don't know that the main ingredient of asprin is found in the bark of Willow trees or have no problem with taking other "substances" to reach higher states of enlightenment!

Do you know what my reply to them is? "Kiss my ......!!" I am 45 years old. My life, looking back now with the difference made by the medication, has been a living hell and I am amazed that I came as far as I did.

I think of myself as a very spiritual person, having a very close personal relationship to Diety as I see it. I have been active to some extent in the Neo-Pagan movement for the last 25 years. I have written a book, with my wife, on the Priesthood within the Nature Religion and have 2 more on the way. I have gone through numerous "healings" throughout my life from Christian to Neo-Pagan to Shamanistic traditions, stress management and time management courses and other therapies. None of these helped more that a few weeks at best due to the fact that my condition is physical. The major point being that now that I am being treated, not only happier, healthier and more centered, I am also able to reach new heights and depths with my spirituality. Being on the medication has not damaged my spirituallity, it has helped it.

Sometimes we are not made 100%. Sometimes we need to use the knowlege we as a race have gained to support the body and mind to function correctly.

I suggest you working with the therapy to stabilze yourself and come to a level that could be considered normal or healthy and then work on your spirituality.

BB

William

[Raven Reed]

Greetings. I am bi-polar with an anxiety disorder as well. I got so sick at one point I was basically housebound for two years because I couldn't leave home without the anxiety overwhelming me.

I pretty much agree with William except for one thing... When I had completely withdrawn from society, the love and support I recieved from my coven was very instumental in helping come out of me shell. If I waited until I was "normal" I would still be housebound. :)

The meds got me to the point where I could even attend, but without access to the spiritual side of myself, I don't think I would have progressed as far as I have. (Notice I don't say normal, because even with meds I may never BE normal...)

But I do agree that the main focus is to worry about health first and spirituality second. Your spiritual side won't go away, it will be there when you are ready!

[William]

Greetings,

I have to agree with Raven Reed... actually I ment something other than what came out..

There is no need to wait to work on your spirituality. If you have others that share your beliefs they could be of great assistance to you in this hard time, but don't worry about the therapy messing up your spirituality. Go with the flow.

BB

William

[WillowPhenix]

Thank you everyone. That helps. I wasnt so worried about the medication as the spiritual affects of what I've done to myself. I truly believe in the threefold law and I was worried about that. I guess I'll just take the hurdles as they come. But I'm getting the therapy and meds that I need to feel better, and its definately helping. Thank you for all your advice, and if you have any more I'd love to hear it. :hugz:

Blessed be,
WillowPhenix

[MsFireHaven]

Greetings. I am bi-polar with an anxiety disorder as well. I got so sick at one point I was basically housebound for two years because I couldn't leave home without the anxiety overwhelming me.

I pretty much agree with William except for one thing... When I had completely withdrawn from society, the love and support I recieved from my coven was very instumental in helping come out of me shell. If I waited until I was "normal" I would still be housebound. :)

The meds got me to the point where I could even attend, but without access to the spiritual side of myself, I don't think I would have progressed as far as I have. (Notice I don't say normal, because even with meds I may never BE normal...)

But I do agree that the main focus is to worry about health first and spirituality second. Your spiritual side won't go away, it will be there when you are ready!


I agree with it all! I also am bi-polar with agoraphobia, and anxiety.
Keep up the thearpy and the meds! You will find things are soo much better.

[William]

Hi WillowPhenix,

I wasnt so worried about the medication as the spiritual affects of what I've done to myself. I truly believe in the threefold law and I was worried about that.

As far as what you have done having an affect on you spiritually... I don't see it. You may have to live with the consiquences of your actions on the physical plane but I seriously doubt that the Gods will hold it against you as long you are doing what you can.


BB

William