2-G
March 25th, 2005, 10:20 PM
Mother, I honor You. I can't really do any fantastic rituals for You tonight, but I've always gotten my feelings out better on the computer. I can see the night outside the window. I've lit a candle for You that's glowing beside me.
Thank you, Goddess. You've blessed me with alot lately. Through prayers, You connected me with one of the greatest boys I've ever met. My friends are ok. My mom is taking mood uplifters, and she's less crazy now. Thankyou for your blessings.
There are a few things I need your guidance with. My grades have been going down. Please give me strength so that I may pass. Especially in math. I have a C, but I need to get a C+.
I've also been very paranoid, lately. I've been scared for no reason, ashamed for no reason, like I've done something wrong. That's how I always feel when something bad is about to happen... please, protect me physically and spiritually. Restore my love for myself. Please take away this hideous emotion that makes me feel unhuman. I've especially been like that with Mike. He's just so great, and so perfect, I feel like I don't deserve him... he's so adorable. I feel very comfortable around him, but sometimes I get insecure with myself. Mother, resolve these feelings so that I can trust. Please.
Also, I pray for strength so that I can stick to my diet and exercise better.
I prayed to You for inspiration. I wanted to write a poem for the Mark Twain contest. It won first place!!!!! I'm very happy! This is one of the only things I've won. Thankyou for helping me find it in myself. I really don't think it's one of my best workings, but oh well.
I can't forget my mom. I hope everything - with all of her tests and all - go well. I also hope she starts accepting my spiritual beliefs more. She thinks that since I'm young, I can't experience spiritual light. This really hurts me. I wish she'd be more accepting. I'm actually starting to tear up... please help. I've been wishing for this for a while, and it breaks me whenever she belittles me because of my beliefs. Now a tear just rolled down my cheek. This is how much it hurts me. I just wish she'd be more understanding. We haven't talked about it in a while, and I'm just afraid of it. She acts like she's in a cult. I just want acceptance. It upsets me so much that she dissaproves of something that is such a big part of me. I remember last Yule, I was on restriction, and she was like,"No rituals, no nothing. it's just another day." IT'S NOT ANOTHER ****ING DAY. It's a day I hold sacred. She doesn't understand at all. She thinks she knows everything about Wicca, but she doesn't. She took away all of my herbs. It makes me so upset that I have to bottle everything inside. My dad is accepting. I wish it didn't have to be like this. Now I'm getting a bit histerical... I guess I didn't realize how much it bothered me.
I guess the main things I'm praying for is peace, strength and happiness. Please bless me with Your wisedom and love. Grace me with Your Divine Touch so that I may succeed. Thankyou for ALL of the blessings You've given me. I'm very greatful. You've done so much for me. You watch out for me and protect me... please don't stop looking out for me... I love you. Blessed be.
Thank you, Goddess. You've blessed me with alot lately. Through prayers, You connected me with one of the greatest boys I've ever met. My friends are ok. My mom is taking mood uplifters, and she's less crazy now. Thankyou for your blessings.
There are a few things I need your guidance with. My grades have been going down. Please give me strength so that I may pass. Especially in math. I have a C, but I need to get a C+.
I've also been very paranoid, lately. I've been scared for no reason, ashamed for no reason, like I've done something wrong. That's how I always feel when something bad is about to happen... please, protect me physically and spiritually. Restore my love for myself. Please take away this hideous emotion that makes me feel unhuman. I've especially been like that with Mike. He's just so great, and so perfect, I feel like I don't deserve him... he's so adorable. I feel very comfortable around him, but sometimes I get insecure with myself. Mother, resolve these feelings so that I can trust. Please.
Also, I pray for strength so that I can stick to my diet and exercise better.
I prayed to You for inspiration. I wanted to write a poem for the Mark Twain contest. It won first place!!!!! I'm very happy! This is one of the only things I've won. Thankyou for helping me find it in myself. I really don't think it's one of my best workings, but oh well.
I can't forget my mom. I hope everything - with all of her tests and all - go well. I also hope she starts accepting my spiritual beliefs more. She thinks that since I'm young, I can't experience spiritual light. This really hurts me. I wish she'd be more accepting. I'm actually starting to tear up... please help. I've been wishing for this for a while, and it breaks me whenever she belittles me because of my beliefs. Now a tear just rolled down my cheek. This is how much it hurts me. I just wish she'd be more understanding. We haven't talked about it in a while, and I'm just afraid of it. She acts like she's in a cult. I just want acceptance. It upsets me so much that she dissaproves of something that is such a big part of me. I remember last Yule, I was on restriction, and she was like,"No rituals, no nothing. it's just another day." IT'S NOT ANOTHER ****ING DAY. It's a day I hold sacred. She doesn't understand at all. She thinks she knows everything about Wicca, but she doesn't. She took away all of my herbs. It makes me so upset that I have to bottle everything inside. My dad is accepting. I wish it didn't have to be like this. Now I'm getting a bit histerical... I guess I didn't realize how much it bothered me.
I guess the main things I'm praying for is peace, strength and happiness. Please bless me with Your wisedom and love. Grace me with Your Divine Touch so that I may succeed. Thankyou for ALL of the blessings You've given me. I'm very greatful. You've done so much for me. You watch out for me and protect me... please don't stop looking out for me... I love you. Blessed be.